Afleveringen
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I'm watching my babies go from being children to being young men, and I gotta be honest, it's making me sadder than I've been in a long time. In this Flying Higher moment I'll share a new thought I had this morning as I watched my 14-year-old in the kitchen. A thought that helped create a deeper shift within me from sadness to joy. Maybe it will help you as much as it helped me.
Need a mentor this year? Go to joinflyinghigher.com to learn more!
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Today I visit with Diana Swillinger, a life coach and fellow advocate for personal growth and healing. Together, we explore the profound role of empathyânot just for others but for yourselfâin overcoming lifeâs challenges and moving forward.
Key Topics Covered:
The role of empathy in healingPersonal responsibility vs. victim-blamingThe difference between needing validation and needing empowermentThe importance of challenging our deeply rooted beliefsA powerful tool for growthBuilding a life aligned with the heart of GodRead the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Love Diana? Listen to Episode 256 of the Flying Free Podcast to get more of her!Check out Dianaâs website.Follow Dianaâs podcast, The Renew Your Mind Podcast. Some of her best episodes include âStaying Out of Family Drama,â âHave To Vs. Choose To,â âWhen People Are Wrong About You,â âWhen People Are Right About You,â and âAccepting What Is.âFollow Diana on Facebook and Instagram.Listen to the episode on victim blaming that I mentioned in todayâs show. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress.
Related Resources:Diana Swillinger is a life and business coach, host of The Renew Your Mind Podcast, and founder of the Renew Your Mind Institute Coach Training. After decades of trying please God, be a good person and do the right thing, she ended up exhausted and discouraged. Desperate for a solution, Diana went back to school, joined personal development programs, and more, then took what she learned and created mind renewal tools that let her love life in every situation no matter what comes her way. Over the past 5 year she has empowered thousands of women with those same tools to heal themselves, get back to who God created them to be, and build a life they love.
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Zijn er afleveringen die ontbreken?
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This week's Flying Higher moment introduces a simple exercise that will help you discover core beliefs that are keeping you stuck. You'll also learn how to quickly create a shift in your body that will give you just enough energy to regain some power and control in your life. It's a powerful exercise to try right at the beginning of 2025!
Links mentioned:
Try Flying Free one week for one dollar now through January 5, 2025 - Click HERE
Flying Free
Flying Higher -
In todayâs episode, I reflect on the incredible transformations that can happen in just one year. (Thatâs not a very long time, when you think about it! I feel like every January, I blink, and itâs December!)
Through powerful testimonials from Christian women, I highlight the courage, growth, and healing that come in just one year of taking intentional steps to break free from abuse, rebuild a life of freedom, and pursue self-development.
Discover how these women overcame fear, anxiety, and self-doubt to embrace healing, reclaim their identities, and create lives full of purpose and joy. Whether youâre navigating the complexities of divorce, overcoming spiritual abuse, or simply seeking personal growth, this episode will encourage you to imagine your own transformation in the coming year.
Heartfelt stories of resilience and transformation from Christian women just like you.Reflections on recognizing abuse, setting boundaries, and finding freedom.Insights into rebuilding relationships with God, children, and oneself after abuse.An invitation to intentionally plan for growth and healing in 2025
What Youâll Hear in This Episode:Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Grab your own butterfly planner for 2025 (and consider joining us in Flying Higher if you want to go through the Wings to Soar planning workshop with me in January 2025!)Listen to the episode mentioned in todayâs show, Episode 197, about all of our different parts and how they interact on our bus!Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress.
Related Resources: -
Do you ever wonder if you're measuring up to God's standard? If you're good enough to win God's attention and help? If you've done enough to make your life really matter?
If you're looking for a little hope, joy, and maybe even a restored connection to Godâs original design for humanity, I invite you to listen in to today's Flying Higher moment and embrace the possibility of a deeper faith journey rooted in love instead of manipulation and shame.
Resources mentioned:
Flying Higher
The Mirror Bible -
Hi friends, and Merry Christmas! I hope this special day brings moments of peace and reflection, wherever you are and whatever youâre doing. In this solo episode, I reflect on the powerful connection between scent, memory, and emotionâespecially during the holiday season. Iâll share personal stories, including my years as a soap maker, and how the fragrances of Christmas invite us to reflect on our own environments and experiences.
Weâll explore what it means to find hope and healing in unexpected circumstances and how the true spirit of Christmas can create a lasting fragrance of love, even in challenging seasons.
How our senses connect to our memories and emotions.Why we can grow numb to unhealthy environments.A reflection on religious attitudes and how they impact others,The hope and beauty found in embracing life as it is, not as we expected.
What You'll Learn in This Episode:Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. (The Kindle version is only $2.99 now through the end of the year!)My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. (Again - the Kindle version is only $2.99 now through the end of the year!)Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress.
Related Resources: -
In this episode, we explore what it truly means to "fly higher" in life, even when weighed down by challenges and pain. Through a story and metaphor, you'll learn how letting go of control and embracing internal freedom can transform your darkest moments.
Resource mentioned:
Flying Higher -
In todayâs reflective episode, I share insights from my ongoing recovery following a recent car accident that left me with a broken wrist. I want to draw some powerful parallels for you between my physical therapy journey and the emotional and spiritual healing journeys faced by survivors of abuse.
The reality of physical therapy (hint - itâs not a walk in the park) The role of support systemsEmbracing pain for growthHealing through alignment with your programmingThe power of music to heal
Key Topics Covered:Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Related Resources:
Check out the Flying Free playlist on Spotify! Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for Christian women interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. -
"If I could give you 10x what I paid to join Flying Higher it wouldn't even scrape the true value of the deep level of understanding you have for being exactly where I am right now and how grateful I am that you teach us without holding back." Flying Higher Butterfly
Resources mentioned:
The Butterfly Planner
The Flying Free Website (to hop on my mailing list!)
Flying Free
Flying Higher -
In this deeply insightful episode, I sit down with Dr. Emma Katz to discuss the phenomenon of coercively controlling fathers sabotaging mothers' relationships with their children. Dr. Katz introduces the term âchild and mother sabotageâ (CAMS) to replace the often co-opted term âparental alienation,â highlighting its roots in coercive control and its frequent targeting of mothers.
Dr. Katz explains how societal sexism plays a critical role in these dynamics, amplifying the harm done to mothers and perpetuating harmful stereotypes. She also touches on the challenges survivors face in escaping abuse and emphasizes the strength and resilience it takes to rebuild after experiencing coercive control.
CAMS Explained: Why âchild and mother sabotageâ is a more accurate and protective term than âparental alienation.âThe Role of Societal Bias: How sexist stereotypes are weaponized against mothers in cases of coercive control.Global Gender Bias: Findings from UN research that show the pervasive bias against women worldwide.Survivor Recognition: Why victims of coercive control deserve societal recognition akin to war heroes.Practical Guidance: How survivors can use CAMS terminology in legal and advocacy settings.
Key Topics Discussed:Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Read Dr. Katzâs book, Coercive Control in Children's and Mothers' Lives.Read the article that Dr. Katz quoted from in todayâs interview. Check out Dr. Katzâs Substack and connect with her on Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, and Facebook. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for Christian women interested in 10Xing their self-development progress.
Related Resources:Dr. Emma Katz is a researcher in domestic violence and coercive control, whose work has helped shape legislation and professional practice globally. Her book, Coercive Control in Children's and Mothers' Lives (Oxford University Press), is widely acclaimed. Emma also brings her research to the public in an accessible and influential way on her platform "Decoding Coercive Control with Dr. Emma Katz", which is read by 10,000s of people in more than 90 countries around the world. Emma's research has illuminated children's experiences of coercive control, which had previously remained largely invisible. She argues that children are affected by many forms of abuse inherent to coercive control, including the breaking down of close relationships with loved ones, deprivation of resources, constrained behavior and isolation from the outside world. Her research has been described as "pioneering work" that "will change how we understand and respond to childrenâs experience of domestic abuse.â
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What is Christmas Magic? Do you feel like you're missing out? Here's an idea that might help you have the most magical Christmas of your entire life this year, and your circumstances don't even have to change.
Resources mentioned:
Podcast episodes and articles related to holiday challenges HERE.
Flying Free (for Christian women stuck in emotionally and spiritually abusive relationships, families of origin, or religious communities)
Flying Higher (for Christian women ready to move forward from abuse into their own personal metamorphosis adventure) -
In this personal and anecdotal episode, I reflect on a recent car accident that changed my perspective on pain, resilience, and staying present. Drawing from my own experience of navigating physical injury, emotional turmoil, and life's unexpected disruptions, I want to share some valuable lessons on accepting pain and choosing who we want to be in the midst of it.
Key Takeaways
Pain is a Universal Experience: Everyone faces pain in various forms. Adjusting expectations helps to navigate lifeâs inevitable challenges.Choosing Who to Be in Pain: While we can't control painful circumstances, we can choose our response and who we want to become in those moments.Faith and Resilience: God is present in our suffering, showing us how to lean into pain and live authentically.The Value of Lament: Acknowledging and naming our losses is essential. Lamenting is not about toxic positivity but about truthfully addressing the pain while moving forward.Staying Present: Focusing on the current moment can alleviate overwhelm and help manage pain one step at a time.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Check out the books I mentioned: Manâs Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl and The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for Christian women interested in 10Xing their self-development progress.
Related Resources: -
If you've ever wondered "is my child an abuser?" you'll want to listen to this Flying Higher moment.
Learn more:
Flying Free
Flying Higher -
In todayâs episode, I interview Natalie Deering, an Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapist and host of That Wellness Podcast. Together, we explore practical and spiritual approaches to anxiety, offering tools to transform anxiety from an adversary into an ally. We discuss personal experiences, explain key IFS concepts like "trailheads," and share exercises to regulate the nervous system and foster self-compassion.
Understanding anxiety as a trailhead (find out what a trailhead is in IFS too!)Practical self-regulation tools.The role of fear in anxiety.Spiritual integration.Everyday self-embodiment practices (SEEs).
Key Topics Discussed:Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Connect with Natalie on her website and on Instagram.Listen to Natalieâs podcast, That Wellness Podcast.Check out the books Natalie mentioned, âWhy Zebras Don't Get Ulcersâ and âFuel Your Brain, Not Your Anxiety: Stop the Cycle of Worry, Fatigue, and Sugar Cravings with Simple Protein-Rich Foods.â Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir using IFS about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for Christian women interested in 10Xing their self-development progress.
Related Resources:Natalie Deering is a licensed mental health therapist and IFS level 2 practitioner who specializes in using Internal Family Systems therapy to help people get to know their authentic selves and heal the parts of them that are stuck in the past. Natalie hosts That Wellness Podcast, a podcast that provides interesting IFS-related interviews and meditations for people who are doing healing work on their inner parts using IFS.
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Introducing Flying Higher Moments: A short little weekly insight into topics that are important to you. Today we talk about the parts of us that want to hang onto things in case we might need them AND the parts of us who think that's dumb. Let's talk about decluttering!
All the Scary Little GodsFlying FreeFlying Higher
Resources mentioned: -
The link to register for this weekâs FREE Q&A with the founder of Aimee Says, Anne Wintemute, is HERE! This Q&A will take place on Saturday, November 23 at 11:00 am Central Time. Again, you can register for this event on Zoom HERE.
In this compelling episode, Natalie Hoffman talks with Anne Wintemute, founder of Aimee Says, an innovative AI tool designed to support abuse survivors. Natalie and Anne explore how Aimee Says provides both immediate, compassionate assistance and long-term documentation capabilities for those navigating abusive situations. Anne shares the toolâs features, including its free and paid versions, and emphasizes its privacy and security safeguards. Together, they illustrate how Aimee Says can be an empowering companion for survivors, particularly those involved in legal matters like custody cases.
Anneâs personal motivation for creating an AI tool focused on empowering abuse survivors.The toolâs core purpose of providing survivors with a private, supportive, and easily accessible resource.The features of both free and paid accounts.AI as a transformative tool in abuse advocacy.Practical use case examples.
Key Points:Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Check out Aimee Says for free today. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you.
Related Resources:Anne Wintemute is the Co-Founder and CEO of Aimee Says, the AI companion for victims and survivors of domestic violence. She is a fierce champion for the rights of survivors and children, and systems that hold perpetrators accountable.
Prior to working with survivors, Anne founded and directed an elementary school that became a model for micro-schools across the United States. In her spare time, she enjoys urban homesteading with her partner and their blended family in Denver, Colorado.
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In this episode, I interview Dr. Stephanie Holmes to explore the unique challenges and dynamics within neurodiverse marriages. We talk about how Autism interacts with faith, how religion plays into neurodiversity, the difference between abusers and neurodiverse individuals, and how neurodiverse couples can navigate their relationships more effectively. Dr. Holmes shares insights from her extensive experience working with these couples.
Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Check out Stephanieâs Autism Spectrum Resources for Marriage & Family as well as the International Association of NeuroDiverse Christian Marriage. Go listen to Stephanieâs podcast, NeuroDiverse Christian Couples.Find Stephanie on YouTube.Pre-order Stephanieâs book, Uniquely Us.Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you.
Related Resources:Dr. Stephanie C. Holmes is an ordained minister, author, autism researcher, speaker, and certified autism specialist. She is the owner and founder of Autism Spectrum Resources for Marriage & Family, LLC, and she and her husband, Dan, are co-founders of The International Association of NeuroDiverse Christian Marriage, LLC, and the podcast NeuroDiverse Christian Couples.
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We are celebrating 300 episodes of the Flying Free podcast by looking at where this podcast started, what has been accomplished since then, and where we are heading in the future!
Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you.
Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Related Resources: -
In todayâs episode, I answer a listener's question about co-parenting with an abusive ex and challenge the idea of "working together" with abusers. Youâll learn the importance of shifting the focus away from the abuser and toward personal healing and growth.
Stop investing emotional energy into trying to "fix" or "work with" an abusive person. It's a cycle that leads nowhere.Redefine what it means to be a "father"âbiological ties do not make someone a healthy or safe parent.Avoid gaslighting your children by pretending their experiences with their abusive parent are fun or normal.It is impossible to thrive while working with someone who thrives on control and abuse. The focus should be on healing yourself and your children.
Key Takeaways:Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Episodes mentioned with Bob Hamp: Episode 1, Episode 76, Episode 277, and Episode 297.Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you.
Related Resources: -
In this episode, Natalie interviews guest Anne Blythe, a leader in the Betrayal Trauma Recovery community. Together, they discuss the profound impact of sharing survivor stories, how lived experience can be just as valuable as formal expertise, and the damaging effects of sexual coercion in abusive relationships. Anne also sheds light on critical issues like manipulation, trauma, and reclaiming safety.
Some Key Takeaways:
Sexual Coercion and Abuse: Anne emphasizes how sexual coercion is often a hidden form of abuse within relationships. Many women face manipulation and pressure regarding sexual behaviors, which is often downplayed or ignored by their abusers, adding layers of trauma.Removing Shame from the Healing Process: Survivors often feel isolated or ashamed of their experiences, but through sharing their stories and seeking help, they can shed this burden.Prioritizing Safety Over Confrontation: Directly confronting an abuser often leads to further manipulation. Instead, focusing on safety and gathering support is a crucial first step in the healing process.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Listen to Anneâs podcast, Betrayal Trauma Recovery, on your favorite podcast listening app. Read Anneâs book, Trauma Mama Husband Drama.Check out Anneâs Meditation, Living Free, and Message workshops.Connect with Anne on Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok. If youâve found porn on your husbandâs phone, you can get a simple PDF HERE about what to do next.Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Womanâs Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you.
Related Resources:Anne is the Producer & Host of The BTR.ORG podcast and the author of Trauma Mama Husband Drama. Sheâs also the creator of: The BTR.ORG Meditation, Living Free, and Message Workshops. After years of attempting to stop her husbandâs pornography use and âanger issues,â she turned her attention to establishing emotional and psychological safety for herself and her three children. As she learns in real-time, Anne shares her journey to help women safely and effectively separate themselves from their husbandsâ (or exesâ) emotional & psychological abuse and sexual coercion in order to establish peace in their homes. You can sign up to get group sessions with the coaches at BTR.ORG HERE.
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