Afleveringen
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In this week’s episode of The Unmasking Unschool Podcast,
I am joined by Rebekah Ubuntu (they/them, she/her)
who generously shares their unique perspective on what it means to be in transition;
Refusing to be a finished product; a destination, a known self,
and being open to the mystery of being in process.
Rebekah articulates felt truths that have emerged inside the experience of not knowing, and not needing to know, who they are becoming next;
"refusal as an act of love"
“in honouring refusal, I am also visualising everything that is refused, not being rejected or thrown away […] Composting as a literal phenomena [that] I derive a lot of hope, not necessarily optimism, but hope that even in the face of life destroying forces, that nature has a way of bringing some kind of balance.”
Photo: Ciaran Frame
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz
Subscribe to the SOLA Systems mailing list HERE -
I'm doing something I've never done before.
I'm taking NEW ACTION
I'm inviting all my clients, my podcast listeners, and my subscribers into ONE space;
To coach with me,
LIVE
FREE
NOW
and you are invited.
I'm inviting you too,
to take NEW ACTION
To become someone who can CREATE CHANGE on purpose.
Who can shift the culture, the structure, the fabric of your life experience
into higher integrity:
CHANGE MAKER, CULTURE CREATOR
Info & Enrol: HERE
or:
https://www.solasystems.xyz/cmcc -
Zijn er afleveringen die ontbreken?
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"The art world is so opaque and it really doesn't provide a lot of feedback or clear communication. So many processes are difficult to navigate, I think, probably for most people. And then for someone like me, who really needs to understand the whole process, why things are happening, it's just so difficult to access.
and because there was a sense of scarcity and precarity, we didn't really feel stable. Like we just had to keep working and overworking to prove ourselves..."
This week on the Unmasking Unschool podcast, I speak with artists Mia Rushton and Eric Moschopedis (Mia + Eric).
They share insights from their 15-year collaborative art practice, and what unfolded in our coaching journey that formed part of their ongoing project 'Art School'.
You'll hear about their struggles with art world opacity and inaccessibility, and the resulting self doubt, and sense of not belonging, as well as the breakthroughs that enabled them to recognise the value of their work, and embody that value with a new level of confidence.
Plus the ripple effects - including in how they care for themselves within their practice.
"[it's] been liberating and exciting because it means that we get to decide which systems and structures are interesting to us and which support us and which ones don't and which ones we want to engage in."
Mia and Eric also share about their unique approach to creating a poetic, adaptive and relational culture of access, that informs their work now, and their artwork: 'A Guide for the Prepared'.
To learn more about Mia + Eric's practice:
miaanderic.ca
@mia.and.eric
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz
Subscribe to the SOLA Systems mailing list HERE -
"I don't think I need some tweaks. I think I need to burn it down."
This week on the Unmasking Unschool podcast, I'm joined by the wonderful Andrea Cox (she/her). Andrea joined Unmasking Unschool in 2023 after a burnout that coincided with realising her neurodivergence, and led to the decision to review every aspect of her life, from the inside out. I talk with Andrea about taking the huge leap of going from full time employment to starting her own business as an Occupational Therapist working exclusively with hypermobile and neurodivergent clients.
A decision that was part of a complete reinvention of her life structures.
We also talk about the self doubts that come with working for yourself, and getting comfortable with a new level of visibility. How creating belief in the value of what you offer means your actions and decision are in integrity with how you best live and work so you can offer that value sustainably, and without waiting for permission.
"There's not a single area of my life, honestly, that hasn't been changed."
Find out more about Andrea's Occupational Therapy practice, access relevant resources, and subscribe to her waiting list here:
https://www.hypermobileot.com/
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz
Subscribe to the SOLA Systems mailing list HERE -
Today's Unmasking Unschool podcast episode
is about a common form of static that can mess with your sense of self
corrupt the flow of energy
corral your actions into contortions.
That static in your sense of self is:
Over-identifying with your habitual ACTIONS.
Because over-identifying with your actions, when your actions are learned protective and reactive patterns, to past conditions
means you can't SEE yourself clearly
nor whats possible for you.
SO we clean them up.
And because
ACTIONS
are a primary source of belief.
So when you need to believe New Things about your self, future and dreams
your ACTIONS will be the first confirmation
(before anyone else believes).
Yup.
And when your ACTIONS
change course
into a path that reflects deep integrity with who you are becoming, inside, and what you really want
they create the feedback loop
that AFFIRMS that new emergent self.
Subscribe to the mailing list HERE
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz
Unmasking Unschool opens for enrolment in September! Get ready...
This is the online group coaching, support system, and social context for #autistic/audhd visionaries, creatives, change-makers who are not here to fit in,
to enact the life pivots, self re-inventions involved in becoming your boldest self, and realising your most impactful work in the world...
Subscribe to the mailing list HERE to find out more. -
Your level of self-belief that YOU can
• create the creative / rebellious / outstanding / impactful / world-changing / unique visions, projects, services that you dream of
• BE YOURSELF and make life work at the same time
• experience your FULL self as lovable, seen, enough...
that belief level
is directly correlated to what your environment (your social, economic, physical context)
reflects about WHO you currently are
and how much that aligns with inner self.
How much the IDENTITY you crafted in response to that environment, actually supports you BEING who you are.
So if that IDENTITY is out of date, misaligned, inaccurate
AND you want to go against the grain of your environment
or your past
of what people expect of you
to MAKE BIG DREAMS happen,
that requires carving out space (head space, physical space, attention, time, relational space) for the parts of self, the version of you
that YOU haven't yet experienced.
The new IDENTITY, that your current environment can't possibly reflect...
Subscribe to the mailing list HERE
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
In this week's Unmasking Unschool PODCAST episode I speak to my experiences of having a porous sense of self.
The artistic sensibilities and energetic sensitivities
that this gifted me
but also, how much my journey has been about CREATING and building an ego;
developing an individuated, distinct, felt experience of my own boundaried limits
so that I'm not LOST in other people.
In their gaze, and their energy, and their agenda.
WHAT I represent to others (autistic / adhd / etc)
matters less than:
I experience that I exist.
Because I have CHOICE in my existence. And that choice creates SELF-TRUST;
creates the self esteem + confidence to show up to my life and relationships
knowing I 'have my own back'.
Emerging into an experience of your own self, that is not a product of others dictates takes time, but it is worth the work of re-orienting to Self Connection:
Subscribe to the mailing list HERE
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
Tightly attuned for survival
teaches you: to be oriented to how other people see you.
Then comes: a late-diagnosis/self-identifying as autistic, or AuDHD
opening a door, unfolding a second adolescence, that doesn't match your age, and the "supposed to have done X by now"s:
supposed to know what I like
supposed to know how to do life
supposed to have a job, kids, partner(s), purpose, blah blah by now,
supposed to know what I really feel and what I really want by now
supposed to be living that already by now
supposed to know WHO I am, by now
That AGE COMPARISON,
in the unacknowledged context of survival,
creates a sense of loss;
shoulda woulda coulda
IF ONLY I'd known earlier.
Yes, if only. It hurts. And -
We are a product of our times;
of so much before our times
of so much outside of our own spheres of influence
and yet
here we are.
EXISTING.
Here you are.
Still alive to find out.
Still alive to re-write the story of WHO you are
based on what you did next.
That journey of WHO AM I NEXT?
means:
learning publicly.
Giving over to a process of sharing the process of finding out who you are,
visibly.
Of being someone who is re-oriented to inner self
in order to FIND OUT.
And letting go of the shame of
not knowing (how)
so you can GET to know WHO you became next.
That willingness to learn publicly, transforms the sense of loss
into mind-blowing unfolding
of finding out.
Subscribe to the mailing list HERE
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
Imposter syndrome feels be like:
You're not supposed to be here!
That's not yours!
Who do you think you are?
Who asked you?
You're not good enough!
You don't know enough yet!
But is it true?
Sometimes, its just a product of industry bias; narrow paths to a position of recognised expertise; ~isms presented as meritocracy.
And sometimes its a LACK of feedback, or feedback you can't perceive or receive,
that has you doubting if you can really call yourself that
Other times, it's a signal that you are in the process of becoming.
In this week's podcast episode, I get into these three reasons,
so you can decide whether 'imposter syndrome' feelings are worth believing
or are there to be welcomed as a sign that you are on track.
Subscribe to the mailing list HERE
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
Like many late-identified autistic / AuDHD / ADHD folks,
a foggy, porous, unstructured sense of self;
illusions, fantasies, pipe dreams...
was my predominant experience of myself,
until I learned to take EFFECTIVE, STRUCTURED ACTION.
That action has to be structured a certain way
for it to be effective.
I couldn't do things the way other people did them
nor follow their ideals, without losing myself.
"falling into holes"
In finding what has worked for me, I've adapted a concept that makes a strength out of my need to go deep; my monotropic tendencies; my need for distinction depth;
A way of structuring ACTION, called 'skills stacking'.
And this week's podcast episode is about why this works.
Focusing on the next skill / system / sensorial groove
until it is established, STACKING them one by one,
has given me the material experience
of my own agency, boundaries, and effectiveness
(the antidote to a porous self)
and helped me to build belief, clarity and unconscious competence
for my big impossible dreams
at speed.
I hope it serves you too.
Subscribe to the mailing list HERE
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
In this episode, I speak to the importance of knowing and centring in your strengths, to create more energy. And offering a new term as a way to think about some of those strengths, called 'Distinction Depth'. When an environment or activity affords and rewards distinction depth: you excel!
Subscribe to the mailing list HERE
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
In this episode I talk through seven 'C' words;
CHOICE
CLARITY
COMPETENCE
CAPACITY
CADENCE
COACHING
and I also reference The Social Change Ecosystem Map:
https://buildingmovement.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Ecosystem-Guide-April-2022.pdf
and invite you to consider what 'C' or 'season' are you in?
I also mention that I am sharing some behind the scenes of the creation of the 'final evolved form' of The SOLA System on my mailing list
Subscribe HERE
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
This episode is an interview with Jem Dobie (they/them). Jem is a 'sensory sibling' who has been through the Unmasking Unschool journey, and you're going to hear them talk in generous and vulnerable detail about what it's been like to transform their experience of their life, their sense of self, their relationships and the work they're doing in the world.
More about Jem:
The Feel Good Circus:
Jem Dobie & Rowan Berry
[email protected]
On instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the.feel.good.circus/
On facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thefeelgoodcircus
Mentioned:
Access Intimacy, by Mia Mingus:
https://leavingevidence.wordpress.com/2011/05/05/access-intimacy-the-missing-link/
Jem's favourite resource on boundaries, by Prentis Hemphill:
https://open.spotify.com/episode/65HYFdou7s7vR8LDQpjVAV?si=T3NN1_M8QOearLu-O22cPA
The 'Finding our way' series is also a really important resource for Jem, and this episode, in which Prentis Hemphill interviews Kazu Haga, is where Jem first heard ‘slow is smooth, smooth is fast’:
https://open.spotify.com/episode/5oPiPY4iB7GbbLSq3oOOEr?si=wNnzzGPqQTy_m537SX-nXw
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TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz
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OPEN FOR ENROLMENT:
Unmasking Unschool, the groundbreaking 6 month coaching program, for ambitious, kind-hearted, visionary #autistic folks seeking to enact the life pivots, self-reinventions and creative innovations to become your boldest, most authentic self. Learn more:
https://www.solasystems.xyz/ -
In this episode I talk about what comes after the deep dives into all things autistic stop being satisfying; when information stops being transformative, and you need actual change. I introduce another frame for this series: the 'metaskills' of becoming yourself .
TRANSCRIPT
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
This episode introduces the concepts of 'affordances', 'disaffordances', and 'dysaffordances'; concepts from design thinking that have a lot to offer the project of reframing the value and importance of recognising and embracing what our bodyminds afford us to do, experience, understand.
TRANSCRIPT
This episode mentions:
A designer's approach: how can autistic adults with learning disabilities be involved in the design process?, By Katie Gaudion
https://core.ac.uk/download/pdf/43099267.pdf
Activist Affordances: how disabled people improvise more habitable worlds
By Arseli Dokumaci
Design Justice: commuity-led practices to build the worlds we need, by Sasha Constranza-Chock
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast is for autistic visionaries, creatives and change-makers. Who are seeking to exit the burnout cycles, pathology paradigms, masks and self-negations of the past that keep you stuck, and want to realise the self-reinventions, life pivots and culture-shifting projects to become your boldest most authentic self.
Hosted by Louisa Shaeri, artist, coach, cultural activator, founder of SOLA Systems.
Learn more at solasystems.xyz -
In this week's episode, I'm sharing with you an interview I did with the gorgeous, generous, visionary soul that is Opal Turner. I featured on their podcast Rebel with a Cause. This was my first time being a guest on someone else's podcast and it's going to be hard to beat! Opal asked some really juicy questions. We cried. We laughed, and I felt truly held and seen. And I believe it was mutual. And my hope is that you also feel seen as you listen in enjoy.
This is PART TWO.
The Original podcast was hosted by MediaCat
Mentioned on the podcast:
Jem's The Feel Good Circus creates a space that is not about getting it right.
Visit Laurie’s neuro-queer network.
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Transcript:
www.solasystems.xyz/blog/038
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast (formerly: sensory siblings) is brought to you by Louisa Shaeri, beaming from The SOLA System; the liberatory framework and unmasking unschool for late identified autistic+ folks seeking a new way to see, know and be yourself, beyond the paradigm of pathology, and the fiction of 'normal'.
Unmask, unravel the false ideas of who you are, build a life that works, and emerge from systemic invisibility into the confidence to realise culture shifting projects in the world:
Sign up to the mailing list at solasystems.xyz -
In this week's episode, I'm sharing with you an interview I did with the gorgeous, generous, visionary soul that is Opal Turner. I featured on their podcast Rebel with a Cause. This was my first time being a guest on someone else's podcast and it's going to be hard to beat! Opal asked some really juicy questions. We cried. We laughed, and I felt truly held and seen. And I believe it was mutual. And my hope is that you also feel seen as you listen in enjoy.
This is PART ONE of two.
The Original podcast was hosted by MediaCat
Mentioned on the podcast:
Jem's The Feel Good Circus
Laurie’s neuro-queer network.
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Transcript:
www.solasystems.xyz/blog/037
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast (formerly: sensory siblings) is brought to you by Louisa Shaeri, beaming from The SOLA System; the liberatory framework and unmasking unschool for late identified autistic+ folks seeking a new way to see, know and be yourself, beyond the paradigm of pathology, and the fiction of 'normal'.
Unmask, unravel the false ideas of who you are, build a life that works, and emerge from systemic invisibility into the confidence to realise culture shifting projects in the world:
Sign up to the mailing list at solasystems.xyz -
Doors to The SOLA System + Siblings are OPEN for enrolment:
https://www.solasystems.xyz/summer
This is the 6 month, online, group program for kind-hearted, ambitious, visionary folks who happen to also be autistic, and are seeking the support system and social context to create culture shifting projects.
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Episode Summary:
When what you want to CREATE or BECOME
isn’t just new or unknown, but ALSO involves being more of the parts of you that have in the past been actively discouraged,
the fear of being “too much/not good enough” can stop you expanding and moving forward into your most fervently coveted dreams and goals.
In this episode I share the solution...
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Transcript:
www.solasystems.xyz/blog/036
The next cohort of The SOLA System + Siblings is OPEN!
https://www.solasystems.xyz/summer
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The Unmasking Unschool Podcast (formerly: sensory siblings) is brought to you by Louisa Shaeri, beaming from The SOLA System; the liberatory framework and unmasking unschool for late identified autistic+ folks seeking a new way to see, know and be yourself, beyond the paradigm of pathology, and the fiction of 'normal'.
Unmask, unravel the false ideas of who you are, build a life that works, and emerge from systemic invisibility into the light of your full self:
Sign up to the mailing list at solasystems.xyz -
Connect with Louisa on Instagram HERE
Episode Summary:
In the legacy of Eurocentric forms of knowledge,
that are about having a self appointed god-like gaze over others
and naming and labelling and defining meanings
into splits separations and hierarchies,
there is an obsession with being right.
With doing the right thing
in the right way;
fitting in with the status quo
being a good cog
not rocking the boat.
This can complicate the path to identifying, expressing and contributing your gifts.
And contribute to a sense that - it’s not actually okay for me to express my gifts.
It's not possible for me to prosper AND be myself.
It will lead to rejection or harm.
And yet, you have an inner conviction, right?
There is some part of you that does know that you have strengths, insights, perspectives, gifts, unique zones of excellence...
So the solution is to get around people who can amplify that inner knowing.
And who can reflect that conviction back to you.
Transcript:
www.solasystems.xyz/blog/035
The next cohort of The SOLA System + Siblings will open in July.
Get on the mailing list here:
solasystems.xyz
_____________________
The Unmasking Unschool Podcast (formerly: sensory siblings) is brought to you by Louisa Shaeri, beaming from The SOLA System; the liberatory framework and unmasking unschool for late identified autistic+ folks seeking a new way to see, know and be yourself, beyond the paradigm of pathology, and the fiction of 'normal'.
Unmask, unravel the false ideas of who you are, build a life that works, and emerge from systemic invisibility into the light of your full self:
Sign up to the mailing list at solasystems.xyz -
Connect with Louisa on Instagram HERE
Episode Summary:
Money does not have to equal extraction and exploitation.
But when we witness corruption that leads to lives being valued below profit,
AND also hear phrases like "charge your worth",
it can lead to thinking that our worthiness has something to do with our ability to be productive or fit into pre-existing agendas, values and flow structures.
In this episode, I make the case that your inherent worth is infinite - and separating the value of what you create from your inherent self worth, means you can consider HOW and to WHOM you communicate the value of what you create, without attachment.
Transcript:
www.solasystems.xyz/blog/034
The next cohort of The SOLA System + Siblings will open in July.
Get on the mailing list here:
solasystems.xyz
_____________________
The Unmasking Unschool Podcast (formerly: sensory siblings) is brought to you by Louisa Shaeri, beaming from The SOLA System; the liberatory framework and unmasking unschool for late identified autistic+ folks seeking a new way to see, know and be yourself, beyond the paradigm of pathology, and the fiction of 'normal'.
Unmask, unravel the false ideas of who you are, build a life that works, and emerge from systemic invisibility into the light of your full self:
Sign up to the mailing list at solasystems.xyz - Laat meer zien
