Afgespeeld
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Listen to this audiobook free with a 30-day trial. Go to http://hotaudiobook.com/free Title: The Art of Saying NoSubtitle: How to Stand Your Ground, Reclaim Your Time and Energy, and Refuse to Be Taken for Granted (Without Feeling Guilty!)Author: Damon ZahariadesNarrator: Joe HempelFormat: UnabridgedLength: 2 hrs and 22 minsLanguage: EnglishRelease date: 09-04-17Publisher: Damon ZahariadesRatings: 4 of 5 out of 29 votesGenres: Self Development, Communication SkillsPublisher's Summary:Stop being a people pleaser! Learn to set boundaries and say no to people - without feeling guilty!Are you fed up with people taking advantage of you? Are you tired of coworkers, friends, and family members demanding your time and expecting you to give it to them?If so, The Art of Saying No is for you.Imagine being able to turn down requests and decline invitations with confidence and poise. Imagine saying no to people asking you for favors, and inspiring their respect in the process.Download The Art of Saying No: How to Stand Your Ground, Reclaim Your Time and Energy, and Refuse to Be Taken for Granted (Without Feeling Guilty!)Amazon best-selling author Damon Zahariades provides a step-by-step, strategic guide for setting boundaries and developing the assertiveness you need to maintain them. You'll learn how to say no in every situation, at home and in the workplace, according to your convictions. And best of all, you'll discover how to get your friends, family members, bosses, coworkers, and neighbors to respect your boundaries and recognize your personal authority.In The Art of Saying No, you'll discover:Contact me for any questions: [email protected]
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Listen to this audiobook free with a 30-day trial. Go to http://hotaudiobook.com/free Title: Not NiceSubtitle: Stop People Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty... And Start Speaking up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, and Unapologetically Being YourselfAuthor: Dr. Aziz Gazipura PsyDNarrator: Dr. Aziz Gazipura PsyDFormat: UnabridgedLength: 18 hrs and 2 minsLanguage: EnglishRelease date: 11-30-17Publisher: The Center for Social ConfidenceRatings: 5 of 5 out of 11 votesGenres: Self Development, Communication SkillsPublisher's Summary:Are you too nice?If you find it hard to be assertive, directly ask for what you want, or say "no" to others, then you just might be suffering from too much niceness.In this controversial book, world-renowned confidence expert, Dr. Aziz Gazipura, takes an incisive look at the concept of nice. Through his typical style, Dr. Aziz uses engaging stories, humor, and disarming vulnerability to cut through the nice conditioning and liberate the most bold, expressive, authentic version of you.You'll discover how to:Contact me for any questions: [email protected]
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In today’s episode Alex and Mimi chat about a concept that has proven itself time and time again, throughout both their business and personal lives. May you might want to sing along like in the Disney movie Frozen, as we are going to be discussing - Letting Go.
Whether it’s waiting for a friend to reply to your important message, asking someone out on a date, to sending a business proposal to client or applying to go to University / College. We’ve all felt the fear of losing out on the one thing we’ve been dreaming about. Often a thought that we’ve put so much energy behind can have us attached greatly to the outcome and even more often this leads to disappointment.
We see it in depressed people or people who hold low value of themselves, disappointment seems to be everywhere these days. Too much of this is wrapped up in misread expectations and clinging on too hard to your desires. Maybe you lost your partner or your job and you just can’t seem to;‘LET IT ALL GO’
“You might fail at this at first and that is Ok, you have to keep getting up and doing it because eventually it will work out” - Alex [9:00]
Alex and Mimi share how they’ve had to overcome this time and time again, from negotiating the sale of Luxy hair to walking away from relationships that were not good for them. Mimi shares her Vipassana story and how she learnt the importance of equanimity:
Equanimity - noun
calmness and composure, especially in a difficult situation."she accepted both the good and the bad with equanimity"
composure, calmness, calm, level-headedness, self-possession, self-control, even-temperedness, coolness, cool-headedness, presence of mind.“I understand you really want this and it’s your desire, but because you want this so badly, it’s probably not going to work” - Alex [8:00]
Whether it’s someone bullying you or you’re simply not happy with your job or relationship, or looking to find the perfect place to live, there’s so much you can take away from this episode.
Here’s what we get into:
Attachment is most obvious during challenging times The truth can hurt sometimes but it’s that pain is your bodies way of showing you to change The importance of meditation and a still mind during times of conflict Conflict can be with yourself not just with others How desperation seeps into your interactions, how to communicate your intentions Sometimes you have to face losing it all to get your dream life Outcome dependency reduces your negotiating powers Letting go isn’t an instant strategy, it’s a mindset that takes time to become effective Only you can set your real valueLetting Go - The Pathway of Surrender by Dr. Hawkins
Linchpin - Are You Indispensable?
Full show notes: https://www.ikonns.com/podcast/episode41
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Travelling, building new relationships, getting a new job, giving and honest feedback or speaking in public — all these situations require you to go outside your comfort zone. And here is the dilemma: one part of us wants to stick to our comfort zone, while the other part strives to face challenges, have unique genuine experience and grow. And, as Seth Godin explains this, our lizard brain – the primal part of us – wants us to stay safe and keeps us far away from any changes.
There is a relationship that we need to have with ourselves, Alex believes. And by that he means the understanding that, by nature, we are all designed to seek comfort, because our lizard brain wants us to be safe and not to die. However, with this thinking, we will never actually experience anything in life. And let’s be real: a lot of people prefer to stay in the comfort zone. And the reason some of us don’t get that job promotion, or the reason we aren’t in a relationship with the person of our dreams or we don’t experience what we want to experience in life is simply because we are in a comfort zone.
“The most oldest part of our brain – the lizard brain or the primal brain – protects us from changes and strives for our safety. That’s why it’s so important to be aware of that part of ourselves that wants us to stay safe and survive. We don’t have to deny it, we have to understand it and learn more about it, so that we can be aware of what actually holds us back” – Alex Ikonn
Coming from the background of immigrants moving to Canada, Mimi and Alex started everything from scratch. And all the adversities they have faced allowed them to build strong and beautiful relationships, be here today where they are, do what they love and live the life they have always dreamt about. That’s why the Ikonns family believes – and knows it for sure – the feeling of discomfort is normal. Actually, it is the signal of growth.
“Depending on how you interact on this discomfort,'' Alex explains, “it will go one place or another”. We must be aware that we can’t expect growth without discomfort. So, it’s also about reframing our relationship with what that feeling is. If we give up in power of the resistance voice that holds us back, then how do we expect to grow, prosper and change?
Alex mentions the great example of working out. When we exercise, we build our body by tearing our muscles apart. And the reason we become stronger is that our muscles tissues will then repair and rebuild and become stronger. First we make them uncomfortable, then we tear them apart, and when we work out enough, we then create that growth. So, that’s why Alex is sure that feeling discomfort means getting stronger is the very basic law of nature.
“Life is always changing, pushing you to grow and step into new stages of your life. The moment you shy away from that is the moment you stop growing” – Mimi Ikonn
Have you ever asked yourself the question of why so many people struggle with the idea of how to grow their relationships and careers? The reality is simple: in order to have a better life, we will have to face the challenges and the discomfort, and go through them. And one of the most important things to keep in mind is to always be honest one with another in relationships and face challenges together, and not be afraid to talk through what you think or feel.
The reason so many marriages and friendships fall apart is because with the time the parties just stop talking to each other and they don’t actually want to bring some certain things up. But, here is a great reminder: we will not be able to grow in our relationship unless we will be able to face challenging situations together. When we are able to do emotional work by truly listening, opening up, giving each other enough space, being vulnerable and accepting our own fault, we will defuse the conflict and have that massive opportunity to build a stronger bond.
“So many family relationships, friendships, marriages come to the point then someone just don’t want to face the challenge. Unless both parts are ready to work with this, be honest and open, they cannot experience growth” – Alex Ikonn
Alex believes that life throws us in challenges, because it wants us to teach a lesson. That’s why we also have to be open to the adversity. The moment we bring that awareness of discomfort, it’s really the moment for us to see how we can make the best of it and what we can learn. We are our own habits, we build them every day. So, in any situation of growth, we will face discomfort. By focusing on it and seeing it as a real opportunity, we will build this healthy habit of getting outside our comfort zone and become a little better.
And another kind reminder: the reason we are here is not to hide, is to live.
Here is what else we have talked about:
How being courageous in all areas of our life helps us face challenges and become better The consequences of staying in a comfort zone and not taking responsibility for our choices The power of facing reality of life and discomfort How giving a feedback creates an opportunity to have deeper, stronger, fulfilling and beautiful relationships How giving more freedom to your children will help them become stronger Power of placebo energy
Books we have mentioned in this episode:
Linchpin - Are you indispensable? by Seth Godin
Do the Work by Steven Pressfield
