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When a narcissist targets you for abuse, they reserve a special kind of cruelty that no one else sees. This powerful episode pulls back the curtain on narcissistic abuse through raw, firsthand accounts that validate what countless survivors experience behind closed doors.
Dana and her co-host courageously share their personal journeys through narcissistic relationships, revealing how these master manipulators present a charming face to the world while systematically destroying their victims' sense of reality, self-worth, and safety. They discuss Dana's revealing book "Narc Narc, Who's There?" which documents through text messages, emails, and photographs the calculated manipulation narcissists employ.
The conversation explores how narcissistic abuse escalates gradually, testing boundaries until victims become accustomed to increasingly harmful behavior. "It's interesting how they see what they can get away with," one host explains. "It's like dipping your toes in the water... Every time they do something they just go, they just put their toe just over that edge to where they know it's going to poke at you a little."
Particularly moving is their discussion of the physical toll this trauma takes—from eating disorders that persist decades later to the physical pain of simply writing about past experiences. The hosts don't shy away from addressing how narcissistic parents devastate children's development, with alarming statistics showing that 38% of all US children experience at least one incident of domestic violence or abuse before age 18.
Despite the heavy subject matter, the episode offers genuine hope. Both hosts have not only survived but built fulfilling lives after narcissistic abuse. Their message to listeners still trapped in these relationships is clear: healing is possible, you deserve better, and you're not alone in this fight. As one host powerfully states, "We survived it. We are living beautiful lives now. You don't have to stay in that muck."Support the show
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The unexpected viral success of our podcast has revealed a disturbing truth: millions of people recognize the nightmare of narcissistic abuse. While gratified to reach so many, we're heartbroken that our stories resonate with such a vast audience.
This episode takes a dark turn as we explore the shocking reality of narcissistic retaliation. Dana shares a chilling recent incident where someone targeted her daughter Faith's medical insurance shortly after our podcast gained popularity—calling to cancel coverage for a child who nearly lost her life earlier this year. This perfectly demonstrates how narcissists operate: identifying your most vulnerable point and striking there deliberately, even years after you've escaped their direct control.
We dive deep into the ongoing nature of narcissistic abuse, revealing how going "no contact" often isn't the end but merely shifts the battlefield. From smear campaigns that isolate victims from family to intimidation tactics designed to remind you they're still watching, narcissists refuse to relinquish control easily. These aren't just petty annoyances—they're calculated psychological warfare designed to maintain power over your life.
The conversation turns deeply personal as we share our experiences with family estrangement, the pain of watching family gatherings happen without you, and the lifelong journey of healing from being told you're not "enough" by those who should love you unconditionally. We also address a heartfelt message from a listener questioning her strength, reminding everyone that survival itself is evidence of extraordinary resilience.
For anyone currently trapped in the fog of narcissistic abuse or struggling through its aftermath, know this: you're stronger than you realize, you deserve peace, and you're absolutely not alone. Join us next episode for a special Q&A where we'll answer your questions about narcissistic abuse, recovery, and our personal journeys.Support the show
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The unfiltered wisdom of teens takes center stage in this refreshingly honest conversation about youth mental health. When our teenage guests Kinsley and Faith join the podcast, they waste no time delivering hard truths about what young people actually need from the adults in their lives.
"Maybe not hound them so much about a couple of things on the floor of their room," Kinsley suggests when asked what adults can do better. This simple yet profound insight sets the tone for a discussion that peels back the layers of teen-adult communication barriers. Throughout the episode, our young guests highlight the disconnect between what adults think helps and what teens genuinely need: space when appropriate, genuine listening (not the "uh-huh" kind while scrolling on phones), and the security of knowing someone will respond immediately - even to texts sent at 12:50 AM.
The conversation introduces the powerful concept of an "emotional toolbox" - resources teens can access during difficult moments. From creative outlets like Kinsley's remarkable artistic talents to having a designated trusted adult, these tools provide crucial support systems. Victoria shares the touching practice of maintaining an "invisible string" with Kinsley, where intuitive understanding sometimes means simply showing up without being asked and sitting together during tough moments. This level of attunement creates the safety net teens need to navigate emotional challenges.
Our guests offer practical strategies any teen can implement: finding calming creative activities, playing games that redirect anxious thoughts, writing letters to yourself during difficult times, and remembering that hard moments don't last forever. Parents and caregivers will find invaluable insights into building trust with the teens in their lives, while young listeners will discover they're not alone in their experiences and that asking for help isn't weakness - it's wisdom. Ready to transform how you connect with the teens in your life? This episode might just change everything. Visit StuccoSquad on Facebook to join our community and access free resources for supporting teen mental health.Support the show
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What does it mean to heal after narcissistic abuse? In this raw, unfiltered Q&A episode, Dana and Victoria tackle the questions that keep survivors up at night—from handling others' judgment to finding self-worth when everyone around you has tried to strip it away.
"I don't have to prove anything to anybody," Victoria asserts when addressing how to handle others talking down about you. This powerful statement sets the tone for a conversation that gives listeners permission to stop shrinking themselves for people who can't—or won't—see them clearly. The hosts share deeply personal experiences about recognizing they weren't at fault for their abuse, a realization both admit they're still working through even now.
As the episode unfolds, Dana and Victoria create a safe space for exploring how to celebrate your individuality in families that demand conformity. "You don't have to fit in," they remind listeners, challenging the societal expectation that family relationships must follow a predetermined script. Instead, they propose a radical idea: what if the problem was never you?
The most moving moment comes when the hosts address a question from a young listener about suicidal thoughts. Their compassionate response acknowledges the reality of those feelings while offering hope. "You know you're worth the fight because you've started your journey," Victoria says, speaking directly to a teenager questioning their worth while navigating gender transition without family support.
Whether you're questioning if you could someday become a narcissist (spoiler: if you're worried about it, you're not one), feeling responsible for your family's dysfunction, or simply trying to understand how to let people in after abuse, this episode offers validation, clarity, and the comforting reminder that you've survived 100% of your worst days—you are stronger than you know.Support the show
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Support the show
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Support the show
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Mark Wright's story redefines what's possible after traumatic injury. As the first amputee motorcycle officer in United States history, Mark demonstrates that our physical limitations are often far less restrictive than our mental ones.
When Mark crashed his motorcycle after a late-night shift, hitting a disabled vehicle with no lights, his world changed forever. Multiple compound fractures left his left foot "like it went through a meat grinder." Despite doctors' attempts at limb salvage, Mark knew from his Marine Corps experience that amputation was inevitable. What happened next stunned everyone—from amputation in March to full police duty by December, and eventually qualifying for the elite motorcycle officer position, a feat many thought impossible.
"Our minds are our only limit," Mark explains, crediting his extraordinary recovery to mindset and exceptional support from his department. Unlike organizations that might sideline an amputee, Mark's colleagues embraced his return, even modifying equipment to accommodate his prosthetic leg. This partnership between personal determination and institutional support created the perfect environment for success.
Mark approaches life's challenges with remarkable humor and perspective. His license plates read "I'm on my last leg" and "It only cost me a leg." When people stare or ask questions, he uses these moments as teaching opportunities rather than sources of frustration. His philosophy is refreshingly simple: "My foot ain't going to grow back, so why waste emotional energy stressing about it?"
Whether you're facing your own physical challenges or simply need inspiration to overcome life's obstacles, Mark's journey reminds us that our perceived limitations often have little to do with our actual capabilities. Connect with Mark through his social media if you're struggling with similar challenges—he's made it his mission to help others realize they too are unstoppable.Support the show
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The pollen count is high and so are the emotions in this raw, unfiltered conversation between Victoria and Michael. Between sneezes and watery eyes, they dive into the grueling realities of advocacy work—the sleepless nights, endless paperwork, and emotional toll that comes with fighting for those who cannot fight for themselves.
Victoria opens up about a new family she's working with, revealing the complex dynamics involved in cases with multiple children and parents. Michael courageously shares his personal experience as a male survivor of domestic abuse, shedding light on the silent suffering many men endure when society tells them to "take it like a man." His powerful testimony offers hope to other men trapped in abusive relationships, affirming that escape and healing are possible.
The conversation shifts to frustrations with healthcare systems that make patients wait months for necessary surgeries while jumping through bureaucratic hoops. But the most passionate moments come when Victoria fiercely defends her daughter against narcissistic family members who show love only when it benefits them. Her maternal protectiveness ignites as she recounts how these individuals have repeatedly disappointed her daughter despite her unwavering love and desire for genuine connection.
A beautiful highlight emerges when Victoria shares a touching poem written by her daughter—a testament to resilience despite experiencing neglect and pain. This heart-to-heart reminds us that while we cannot choose our biological family, we can create supportive environments with people who truly value us. Listeners struggling with toxic relationships will find validation and encouragement in this authentically human episode about standing up for what's right, even when it's difficult.Support the show
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Ever wondered what happens when you throw together a redhead, a redneck, and a family dynamic that thrives on elaborate pranks? This raw, unfiltered episode takes you straight into the chaotic heart of family relationships where shoes get thrown in restaurant parking lots and trucks become canvases for bird droppings and marshmallows.
But beneath the laughter lies something deeper. When our conversation shifts to children caught in divorce crossfire, we don't hold back. From personal experiences to heartbreaking stories of kids shuttled weekly between homes, we explore the real cost of parental battles. "It's not fair," becomes the recurring theme as we advocate for children who never asked to be pawns in adult conflicts.
The contrast between our lighthearted family antics and these profound reflections mirrors real family life – where profound conversations about childhood trauma might be immediately followed by a heated debate about whether all Skittles actually taste the same. Our impromptu blindfolded taste test brings welcome comic relief before we dive back into family dynamics.
You'll hear unvarnished truths about blended families, co-parenting challenges, and the lasting impact of childhood experiences. We don't claim to have all the answers, but we offer authentic perspectives from people who've lived through the complexities of modern family relationships.
Whether you're navigating co-parenting challenges, curious about blended family dynamics, or simply enjoy unscripted family banter, this episode delivers raw honesty wrapped in humor that can only come from people who genuinely care about each other – even when they're plotting their next outrageous prank.
Join our conversation, and perhaps find some comfort knowing that families everywhere are finding their way through similar challenges with whatever combination of love, humor and occasional chaos they can muster.Support the show
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Take a deep breath with us as we explore the transformation that awaits beyond toxic relationships. In this raw, unfiltered conversation, we step away from the heaviness of narcissistic abuse to focus on something equally important. This beautiful life exists on the other side of healing.
One host shares her harrowing health journey, describing how narcissistic abuse physically manifested as a life-threatening lung condition requiring constant oxygen support, with levels dropping to a dangerous 83%. Yet, within years of leaving that relationship, her body healed dramatically, a powerful metaphor for the emotional recovery possible for all survivors.
We explore those exhilarating moments of freedom when you finally ask yourself, "What do I want?" after years of living by someone else's rules. Whether it's enjoying butter pecan ice cream for dinner or getting your nails done for the first time in years, these small acts of self-determination mark the beginning of reclaiming your authentic self.
The conversation delves into how childhood conditioning shapes adult behaviors, surprisingly, from protective postures around food to unhealthy relationship patterns. We discuss how narcissistic abuse affects not just the direct victim but ripples outward to impact children, family members, and entire communities.
For those still trapped in toxic relationships and wondering if escape is possible, yes, freedom awaits you. The landscape beyond abuse isn't just livable; it's breathtaking. You've survived every dark day so far, and healing, joy, and peace aren't just possibilities; they're your birthright. Join us as we celebrate the view from the other side and remind you that you're worth fighting for.Support the show
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Taking a deep breath becomes an act of revolution after escaping narcissistic abuse. In this raw, unfiltered conversation, Faith and Dana step away from their usual format to share profound insights about life after abuse—and why that journey is worth every difficult step.
Faith arrives emotionally drained from six days of intense advocacy work, including a harrowing six-hour standoff, prompting a candid discussion about the toll of supporting those still trapped in toxic dynamics. Rather than dwelling in darkness, they pivot to the transformative healing possible once survivors cross to the other side of trauma.
Dana vulnerably shares how her 25-year marriage to a narcissist nearly killed her—literally. Her body deteriorated to 93 pounds, requiring constant oxygen supplementation as her organs began shutting down, with oxygen levels dangerously low at 83%. Yet within five years of freedom, her health dramatically improved, demonstrating the profound physical healing possible when removed from toxic environments.
The conversation weaves through practical strategies for reclaiming joy after abuse. From Faith's simple act of getting her nails done—a rare moment of self-care—to Dana's liberating realization that she could eat ice cream for dinner without following her ex's rigid rules, these small victories represent monumental steps in the healing journey. Their shared wisdom crystallizes into a powerful question survivors can ask themselves: "What do I want?" A question that feels revolutionary after years of putting everyone else first.
They tackle complex issues with compassion and occasional humor—discussing how childhood conditioning shapes adult behaviors, the physical manifestations of emotional abuse, and why leaving abusive situations is rarely simple. The conversation acknowledges the reality that narcissistic abuse affects entire families, with children's core beliefs about themselves largely formed by age seven.
Join Faith and Dana for this life-affirming reminder that peace, joy, and renewed health await on the other side of narcissistic relationships. If you're struggling, remember their parting message: "You are worth fighting for and you can get past all of this. You are not alone."Support the show
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Every survivor deserves a voice—regardless of gender. When Michael witnessed his wife Victoria's domestic violence advocacy work up close for the first time, it sparked a raw, necessary conversation about who abuse affects and how cycles can be broken.
Victoria pulls back the curtain on her nearly two decades as an advocate, showing how she bridges the gap between survivors, law enforcement, and the court system. She explains the crucial first steps an advocate takes when approaching authorities: "I am not a threat to you, I am a domestic violence advocate." This inside look demystifies a process that many fear, potentially giving survivors the courage to seek the help they deserve.
The conversation takes a powerful turn when Michael shares his own journey as a male survivor of emotional and financial abuse. "I would tell people, 'Oh, that's just the way she is' for years," he reveals, describing how he would "smile and laugh it off" while going home miserable. His vulnerability challenges the harmful stereotype that men can't be victims, showing fellow male survivors they aren't alone in their experiences.
Both hosts emphasize that breaking generational cycles is possible—and essential. "It is not fair to make our children spend their adulthood recovering from their childhood," Victoria states, as they discuss how conscious parenting choices can create homes free from the trauma they experienced. Their message is clear: whether you're seeking help or supporting someone who is, speaking up against abuse changes lives.
Ready to join the conversation about breaking cycles of abuse? Subscribe now and share your thoughts. If you're experiencing domestic violence or know someone who is, resources are available through our website—because everyone deserves a life free from abuse.Support the show
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Heartfelt celebrations and serious conversations collide in this candid episode where we start by toasting Michael's first colonoscopy (yes, really!) and the clean bill of health that followed. It's a perfect reminder that sometimes the most uncomfortable moments become our greatest gifts to those we love - as Michael puts it, "I want to live longer for my family."
The energy shifts as we unveil our passion project: the Stucco Squad. This initiative for special needs children has consumed our hearts completely, with carefully crafted items from superhero bracelets that can be worn through medical procedures to "pocket hugs" for comfort during difficult moments. Drawing from Victoria's personal journey as both a special needs person and parent, every detail has been considered with extraordinary care. "Normal, ordinary - that's who wants it? Nobody does," Victoria shares, capturing the spirit behind this movement to celebrate what makes these children exceptional.
Our conversation takes a more serious turn as we discuss California legislation allowing minors to pursue gender reassignment surgery without parental consent - even permitting legal action against objecting parents. We wrestle with difficult questions about children's capacity for life-altering decisions, sharing perspectives that challenge conventional thinking while maintaining respect for everyone's journey.
Throughout it all runs a thread about genuine human connection in our increasingly digital world. We share how our family dinners remain sacred spaces without phones, where eye contact and conversation remind us what truly matters. "It's the happiness that I crave, it's the longing, it's the belonging," Michael reflects about these precious moments.
We'd love to hear your thoughts on any of these topics. Have you created tech-free family traditions? What do you think about the balance between protecting children and respecting their autonomy? Join our conversation and discover the power of unstoppable, unfiltered authenticity.Support the show
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https://www.amazon.com/Dream-Things-Never-Kunken-Story/dp/1946074411/ref=sr_1_1?crid=I0A7ECUBICVQ&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.vAMrAnYnj9uBVExYnQAqxQ.TbIaGSb-nuHCxGomqQSS7iGt-mmIv_mqDBOLqKob1oM&dib_tag=se&keywords=ken+kunken+story&qid=1742781695&sprefix=ken+ku%2Caps%2C129&sr=8-1
The moment Ken Kunkin made that fateful tackle during a Cornell University football game in 1970, his life's trajectory was forever altered. Left a quadriplegic with minimal movement in just his left arm, Ken faced a medical establishment that offered little hope—suggesting his future might consist of selling magazine subscriptions by telephone. But this podcast conversation reveals how profoundly they underestimated his determination.
Ken's journey unfolds like a masterclass in resilience. With unwavering family support who promised to serve as his "arms and legs," he became the first quadriplegic to graduate from Cornell University—navigating a campus without a single ramp or curb cut. Against all odds, he earned three Ivy League degrees, only to face another crushing reality: despite sending over 200 resumes, no one would hire him. The employment discrimination he encountered eventually gave way to opportunity when Dr. Henry Viscardi Jr. recognized his potential, launching Ken into a remarkable 40-year career as an Assistant District Attorney.
What makes this conversation particularly captivating is how Ken’s personal and professional journeys intertwine. His love story with Anna, who began as his personal care attendant and eventually proposed to him, reminds us of life’s unexpected beautiful turns. Together, they defied medical improbabilities by becoming parents to triplet sons through in vitro fertilization, creating the family that continues to inspire Ken’s advocacy work.
Throughout our discussion, Ken articulates the transformative impact of the Americans with Disabilities Act while highlighting how much work remains in creating genuinely inclusive spaces. His passionate defense of diversity, equity, and inclusion efforts comes from lived experience—from being unable to fit through courtroom doors as a newly minted prosecutor to having the Nassau County DA's office create an annual award in his name.
Listen to this remarkable story of a man who, when told something was impossible, simply reframed it as "I'm possible." Ken's memoir, "I Dreamt of Things That Never Were," and his continued advocacy remind us that limitations are often more about perception than reality. His message will leave you questioning what seemingly impossible dreams you might pursue with just a bit more determination.Support the show
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Financial abuse remains one of the most powerful yet least understood tactics used by abusers to maintain control. In this raw, emotional conversation, two survivors share their hard-earned strategies for financially preparing to escape dangerous relationships.
The hosts reveal detailed methods that helped them break free—from getting cash back at checkout and removing that portion of receipts, to building reserves through reward programs, gift cards, and couponing. Their advice extends beyond merely saving money to creating comprehensive safety plans, including teaching children emergency protocols and maintaining "grab-and-go" safes with essential documents.
What makes this episode particularly powerful is the authentic vulnerability shared through personal stories. One host reveals the horrifying moment her ex-partner deliberately endangered her infant daughter's life by obstructing her tracheostomy, while another describes preparing end-of-life instructions for her teenage son when she discovered her ex was planning to kill her. These aren't theoretical scenarios but lived experiences that underscore why financial preparation can be life-saving.
The conversation also addresses the judgment survivors often face from those who've never experienced abuse, with a poignant story about confronting a mother who blamed her daughter for staying in an abusive relationship. The comparison between seeking specialized medical care for cancer versus appropriate support for domestic violence survivors resonates deeply.
Whether you're currently planning your exit, supporting someone who is, or simply seeking to understand the complex dynamics of abuse, this episode offers practical wisdom, emotional support, and above all, the reassurance that you are not alone on this journey.Support the show
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When Malcolm Goodwin reached out to thank Victoria for saving his friend's life, it reinforced exactly why the Contagious Smile podcast exists. "I'm not looking for praise or notoriety," Victoria shares with raw honesty. "When I went through this and was laying on the floor bleeding, not wanting to get up, I wished someone could say 'I've got you. You're not alone.'" That connection – knowing someone understands your darkest moments – can transform a tiny remaining spark into a wildfire of healing.
This episode unveils exciting new developments, including Victoria joining Cameo as talent (at just $10 per video) and the creation of the Stucco Squad community, named after Victoria's beloved service dog. The Squad will offer special merchandise including hospital-friendly bracelets for children and families navigating medical challenges. Michael and Victoria's natural, sometimes hilarious banter reveals why their authenticity resonates with millions of listeners worldwide, propelling their podcast into the top 2% globally.
The heart of their mission shines through stories of impact – how Victoria's memoir "Who Kicked First" took a decade to write due to fear but ultimately saved lives, and how her domestic violence advocacy creates practical safety plans for those in danger. Their work extends beyond trauma to celebrate relationships that heal, like Michael's special father-daughter bond with Faith, showcased through weekly movie nights and playful pranks that balance the heavier topics with genuine joy.
Whether you're a survivor seeking connection, a parent navigating challenges, or someone wanting to understand trauma's impact, the Contagious Smile podcast offers a rare blend of unflinching honesty and hopeful perspective. Join the Stucco Squad community on Facebook to participate in upcoming events, contests, and receive updates on their initiatives that turn pain into purpose and isolation into belonging.Support the show
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In this heartfelt episode, It's a colorful tapestry woven from laughter, memories, and the anticipation of what lies ahead.
We discuss the nuances of gifting experiences over material items and reflect on what it means to prioritize relationships and shared moments. We also introduce an upcoming Podcast-a-thon aimed at supporting the Make-A-Wish Foundation, an organization dedicated to bringing joy to children facing life-threatening illnesses, and provide insights into the transformative Give Kids the World charity.
Unpacking the significance of faith in our lives, we celebrate her inspiring journey, remarkable achievements, and how her resilience stirs hope within our community. Join our discussion as we focus on embracing life, encouraging each other to pursue our dreams, and the profound impact of giving back to those in need.
Tune in for a rich conversation that will uplift your heart and inspire action. We encourage you to find joy in the little things while making a difference for loved ones and families in need. Embrace the journey with us, subscribe, share, and become part of our mission to make dreams come true!Support the show
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