Afleveringen
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Sam Cooper is an AuDHD coach and generally awesome human. When we met in person, we bonded over having worn the wrong size shoes for years, which led to the title of this episode.
Sam shares about building a small business, and the upsides and downsides of a coaching business in particular.
Sensory needs and discovering support tools.
They also have an incredibly compassionate approach to their own journey.
Connect with Sam:
Sam's websiteSam's Instagram @unconventionalmindsadhdResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Zann's artist business is one of the easiest things she's ever done. And it's not even her main passion!
Her deeply relatable history includes ten years of feeling like failure soup. It didn't feel like progress or learning, just failure. But it ultimately led her to figure out what does NOT work.
She shares amazing ideas and practical advice.... this will be a great one to listen to more than once!
Connect with Zann:
Paws by Zann websiteZann's blogYouTube art tutorials & BTSResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Zijn er afleveringen die ontbreken?
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If you struggle to figure out what to focus on with bigger goals, you're not alone! Here's one approach I've come up with for my own annual goals in particular. And some thoughts on decision making, since that's part of it.
Wish List for bday (or whenever)
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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I failed my first driving test! On a technicality! Ah, the frustrations of begging to exist in structures not built for us.
Three quick stories about bureaucratic bullshit in a single week, and how it fits into my own big ball of yarn.
It's okay that the stuff that's hard for us is probably never going to be fun or easy.
We need support and RESOURCES that work for us! More on finding good resources in the episode... librarians are often a great place to start.
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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The autistic / AuDHD self-discovery journey can feel like finding out that you've been hammering screws this whole time. You never learned how to use the right tools. You may not have been given the right tools at all!
A few thoughts on the grief inherent in the process, and how to equip your personal toolbox now that you know what's up.
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Weeks and months are staples of scheduling systems. But they tend not to work well for me as units of time.
My personal ideal is two days on, two days off, though that's impractical. Instead, I talk about the various workarounds I've found, including intentionally scheduling rest (and how if I don't have time for that, I need to decrease demands).
If weeks don't work well for you, how can you find what does?
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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This episode is about both why it's so hard to get help as an AuDHDer,
and some of the broad steps I see working for us.
It can help to have a view of your "big ball of yarn" i.e. complex and interrelated problems or life areas.
It can also help to start addressing your sensory needs, core needs, and just live your life while you take a break from big processing.
Please take care and be gentle to yourself!
Links mentioned:
New course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeYour Core Self Care Need episodeThe 4 steps I talked aboutCrisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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What NOT to do in your AuDHD discovery process is just as important as knowing what to do! This episode interweaves nicely with last week's episode about what AuDHDers need.
This is hardly an exhaustive list, but it covers many of the patterns I've seen and heard in the community.
Links mentioned:
InterGifted: What is Giftedness?Autistic Culture PodcastFree Office Hours call (p.s. being a free Patreon member is the best way to get updates/reminders about these calls)Crisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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What do AuDHDers need (beyond the obvious needs all humans have)? And why do those needs matter?
This episode covers some important ones:
Being able to engage with our interests (in a particular way)Executive Function support, without trying to make the hardest things easy or enjoyableAutonomyTrue restThe narrow path of just enough stimulationProcessing timeTo be witnessed in just the right wayRecognition that our needs vary quite a bit day to dayComing to terms with disabilitySpace and time throughout our self-discovery journeySafe enough spaces to explore what it means to be ourselfLinks mentioned:
Executive function test post if you want to ask Qs or share your experienceExecutive Skills Questionnaire Revised (ESQ-R)Unmasking Autism book (affiliate link)Crisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterLove Your Brain courseHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Almost all of us consider formal diagnosis in our AuDHD discovery journey. Whether it's ADHD-focused for medication, or Autism-focused for validation or accommodations.
Knowing why you want the diagnosis goes a long way in figuring out what to pursue. The main options as I currently see them are:
full formal neuropsych testingprovisional diagnosis with a shorter screening testa formal letter requesting accommodations from your providerself-diagnosiscommunity diagnosisThis episode talks about
The upsides and downsides of diagnosis in generalMy personal diagnosis experience (two full rounds of neuropsych testing)Options to approach decision-making for yourselfHow to get started if you do want diagnosisQuestions from the longer decision-making process in the episode are in the Transcript Doc
Crisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesMonotropism resources:
Monotropism Questionnaire and more info about itMonotropism explainedFergus Murray's 6 Starting Points for Understanding Autism034 Monotropism Might Explain Everything with Fergus Murray035 How Much Time Does Creating Take?039 Autism "Levels" and MonotropismOther Links mentioned:
Devon Price's post about Autism diagnosis pros n consThrow Away the Masters Tools: Liberating Ourselves From the Pathology Paradigm by Nick WalkerAuDHD Flourishing Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Bonus drop from The Curiosity Cure podcast:
Today's conversation with Mattia takes us through their journey with chronic pain, feeling better, and the ways they navigate their inner mindbody conversation as someone with AuDHD + PDA. We touch upon themes of neurodivergence, gender transition, resourcing inner + external safety. We chat about using hypnotic techniques to decrease a sense of threat/unsafety that may accompany disorders like ehlers-danlos syndrome and POTS.
Thanks to Deb for sharing this episode: full show notes here
The show notes link above has many resources about successful healing from related conditions
The Curiosity Cure podcast site
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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I'm taking the last two weeks of August off, and will be back in September with a "back to the basics" series about things like diagnosis, what to do when you first discover your AuDHD identity, etc!
In the meantime, you can check out...
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocYouTube: The Longer Road, Mattia guesting on other podsHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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There are many reasons we experience loneliness. There's a particular existential loneliness I experience when I feel like it's not possible for anyone to understand me. And much of that emerged from a lifetime of ableism.
Being in AuDHD community has been incredibly healing. Thank you for being here!
Also... as of today we're over 200,000 downloads... thanks for listening!!
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Working memory may be a main reason we feel so exhausted... we're doing so many things manually that are habits for non-AuDHD brains.
Using a working memory file as we go can help a lot and massively reduce overwhelm and cognitive fatigue. Cal Newport uses a digital file for this during computer work. I've been using post-it notes so I can carry them around with me.
There are many benefits I talk about in the episode, and the main one for me is being able to track decisions as I go so I don't keep trying to make them over and over!
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterLove Your Brain courseHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Today I had several moments of autistic joy (sometimes called "glimmers") that were also great examples of mindfulness. But mindfulness in a way that works for my sensory experience!
Reminder that our brains are also quite capable of delight in little things.
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Quitting can feel amazing, especially when it's a clear self-protection move. And when we haven't waited until it becomes so terrible we have to get out.
But the decision-making process can feel slow!
This episode covers three ways I've decided to quit things:
Big emotions / the thing got really badMath-y pros and cons approach (slow but effective)Getting somatic info from my body#3 is great... but at the same time, I've done years of building safety around receiving and integrating information from my body! It's not just about the technique itself.
Resources:
Mentioned the DEAR MAN skill from DBTLike Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterLove Your Brain courseHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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I recently took the laziest vacation I ever have, and it was a revelation.
Also, there are usually so many external factors we're not considering while laying on the couch feeling too "lazy" to do something! There are layers.
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterLove Your Brain courseHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Men are not the enemy...
Some thoughts on identity, community, and responsibility.
Big shout-out to Devon Price's new book, Unlearning Shame: How We Can Reject Self-Blame Culture and Reclaim Our Power
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterLove Your Brain courseHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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"felt vulnerable, may delete later"
Quick story/update and to validate that communication is so hard... and so are transitions!
Full audio direct link for Patreon folks
Transcript doc
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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AuDHD brains face many challenges when it comes to projects. It's something I've put a great deal of time and learning into, both personally and professionally.
This episode covers many ideas and approaches that tend to work for us.
Key Takeaways:
We usually learn to use what I call the Adrenaline-Anxiety Approach. While effective short-term, it can lead to burnout and other issues.A monotropic approach is more sustainable and individualized... and it can feel slow at first.Experimentation as a core toolCreating just enough structure and safety to get going, without getting bogged down (loose planning)Working with the brain states you haveManaging interruptions, inputs, and daily lifeFinding the balance that works for youThe episode also walks through the Love Your Brain course, designed to help AuDHDers understand their mind-body system, work with brain states, and navigate project challenges. The course emphasizes self-compassion, experimentation, and building processes tailored to individual needs.
Links:Devon Price's Laziness Does Not Exist article, and a PDF if you're not on MediumThe transcript may be especially useful for this episode! (It'll take a few seconds for the link to fully load to this episode)Love Your Brain courseLearn more about Love Your BrainHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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