Afleveringen
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In this episode of Matchmaker Matchmaker, Rabbi and Aleeza tackle a big question from a listener named Shoshana, who has been single for ten years and is struggling to understand why finding a life partner is so hard. The discussion looks at both the spiritual and practical sides of finding a match, exploring the balance between divine intervention and free will. Rabbi emphasizes that the challenge of finding a soulmate is part of God's plan and talks about how time and effort in relationships are crucial for their longevity and success.
Key Points:
Divine Intervention and Free Will: Rabbi explains that while God is involved in matchmaking, humans also have free will, which means the process requires their active participation and decision-making.
The Importance of Effort: Both hosts agree that the difficulty in finding a partner is intentional, designed to make individuals value and work hard for their relationships, ensuring they are cherished and maintained.
Multiple Potential Soulmates: Aleeza and Rabbi discuss the idea that there isn't just one perfect soulmate for each person; several individuals could potentially fulfill that role, which can alleviate some pressure and open more possibilities.
Practical Advice and Hope: The episode concludes with practical advice, such as Aleeza's "Mystery in Your History" course, which helps individuals re-evaluate past connections, and a hopeful message encouraging patience and perseverance in the journey to find a life partner.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast
Watch this episode: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdUtaMTM0rzqa4R2eZWyA9Q -
In this episode, Aleeza and the Rabbi answer a question from Judith, a widow in her 50s. Judith notices that many divorced men she meets blame their failed marriages on their ex-wives' emotional issues, which they say come from being raised by Holocaust survivors. The episode looks into whether this is a real pattern or just an excuse. The Rabbi and Aleeza also talk about how the Holocaust affects later generations. They give Judith and others advice on dating.
Key Points:
Recurring Theme in Divorce Reasons: Judith sees that many divorced men say their ex-wives are emotionally unavailable because of their Holocaust survivor parents.
Holocaust's Lingering Impact: The Rabbi explains how the trauma from the Holocaust can affect the children of survivors, shaping their emotional and relationship issues.
Pattern Recognition and Self-Reflection: Aleeza and Rabbi suggest that Judith think about why she sees this pattern and how her own background might play a role.
Advice for Change: They recommend that Judith try dating outside her usual community to find someone who is emotionally available and a good match.
Watch this episode: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdUtaMTM0rzqa4R2eZWyA9Q
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Zijn er afleveringen die ontbreken?
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Join us for another episode of Matchmaker Matchmaker where your hosts, Aleeza and Rabbi, dive into a heartfelt query from Yosef, who is facing the challenge of unrequited love with a friend. The episode explores the delicate balance of maintaining a friendship while dealing with romantic feelings that aren't reciprocated.
Key Points:
Respecting the Friend's Decision: Aleeza stresses the importance of respecting the friend's feelings and decision to remain just friends, highlighting how essential it is to honor these boundaries.
Timing for Reapproaching: Aleeza advises waiting at least six months before considering to express feelings again, suggesting a gentle approach to see if the dynamics might have changed, without applying pressure.
The Importance of Moving On: Rabbi emphasizes the necessity for Yosef to focus on moving forward, recommending that he explore other romantic possibilities instead of waiting for his friend’s feelings to change.
Taking Time for Self-Reflection: Both hosts agree on the benefits of Yosef taking some time away from the friendship if needed, to mitigate emotional pain and to make space for new, reciprocative relationships.
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Watch this episode: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdUtaMTM0rzqa4R2eZWyA9Q
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
In this episode of Matchmaker Matchmaker, Aleeza and Rabbi respond to a listener who is struggling with self-criticism after a past relationship. They discuss the importance of forgiving oneself and using mistakes as learning opportunities for better future relationships. The conversation offers practical advice on personal growth and emotional recovery post-breakup.
Key Points:
Normalizing Mistakes: Aleeza points out that making mistakes is a common part of all human interactions. She likens it to how children stumble when learning to walk, illustrating that errors are essential for personal development.
Timing of Conversations: Aleeza shares a personal tip about managing emotions during conflicts. She advises waiting until you're calm to discuss sensitive topics to ensure the conversation is constructive.
Shared Responsibility: Rabbi highlights that problems in relationships are usually not one-sided. Recognizing that both partners may contribute to issues can alleviate unnecessary self-blame.
Constructive Reflection: They offer advice on how to reflect on past errors effectively, which includes stopping negative behaviors, expressing regret, clearly stating intentions for change, and making plans for improvement. -
In this episode of Matchmaker Matchmaker, Aleeza and Rabbi discuss the challenges people face when dating after a divorce. They offer advice on dealing with public perception, the best time to share your divorce history, and learning from past relationships to improve future ones. This conversation provides practical tips for those looking to find love again.
Key Points:
Stigma Around Divorce: Aleeza explains that being divorced is more accepted today than before. She suggests that having been married shows you're serious about relationships, which can be a plus when dating again.
When to Share About Divorce: The hosts talk about the right time to tell someone you're dating that you've been divorced. They emphasize being honest and confident about your past.
Learning from the Past: It's important to reflect on previous relationships and understand what you can do better. Knowing what went wrong helps you prepare for a better relationship next time.
Owning Your Story: Aleeza and Rabbi encourage taking responsibility for your part in a past relationship ending. They say this shows maturity and can make you more attractive to potential partners.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
This week, your hosts tackle the listener's question about the meaning and implications of requesting a "phone break" in a relationship. Aleeza and Rabbi discuss various scenarios and motives behind such a request, providing insights into communication dynamics in modern relationships. In this episode, they cover:
Understanding the Request: Exploring what a "phone break" could signify, whether it's a need for space, a sign of feeling overwhelmed, or a desire to shift the mode of communication.
Assessing Relationship Intensity: How frequent and intense communication can lead to one partner feeling smothered, prompting the need for a break.
Positive vs. Negative Implications: Discussing when a phone break might be healthy and necessary for personal processing, versus when it might signal deeper issues within the relationship.
Navigating the Break: Strategies for effectively communicating about the break, setting clear expectations and timelines, and ensuring both partners are on the same page to maintain relationship health.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Welcome to another episode of the Matchmaker Matchmaker podcast where your hosts, Jewish dating experts Aleeza and Rabbi, discuss this week's listeners' question: 'What do you do when a girl doesn't want you But you know, she loves you?' They break down emotional dilemmas, historical perspectives on marriage, and the practical aspects needed beyond love to build a sustainable relationship.
Key Points Discussed:
Discussion on why love might not be sufficient for marriage, emphasizing compatibility and shared life paths.
Exploring how the concept of marrying solely for love is a relatively modern development, contrasting with historical reasons such as financial or social advantages.
The importance of aligning on life goals, values, and personal habits is discussed as essential alongside love for a healthy marriage.
Evaluating whether love itself can sustain a marriage and what other elements are crucial for a lasting partnership.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Welcome back to another episode of the Matchmaker Matchmaker Podcast. On this week's episode, Aleeza and Rabbi discuss the complexities of physical attraction in dating and relationships. They go into the question of what to do when someone attempts to set you up with a person who is considered a great match, but you don't find them physically attractive. The hosts explore the nuances of this situation and provide insights on how to approach it.
Key Points:
The Importance of Physical Attraction: Aleeza and Rabbi discuss the significance of physical attraction in relationships, acknowledging its role while also exploring its limitations.
Handling "Hard No" Situations: The hosts provide advice on how to navigate situations where there is an immediate lack of physical attraction and when it's appropriate to decline a potential match outright.
Giving It a Chance: Aleeza and Rabbi share anecdotes and examples of instances where initial lack of physical attraction evolved after giving the relationship a chance, emphasizing the value of getting to know someone beyond their appearance.
Patience and Decision-Making: The episode concludes with a blessing for patience and wisdom, underscoring the importance of taking time to make the right decision after a few dates and allowing both the heart and mind to align.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Join us this week on "Matchmaker Matchmaker" as Aleeza and Rabbi discuss trust in relationships. They explore the time it takes to establish trust, the link between commitment and the growth of trust, and the impact of personal insecurities and past traumas on trust-building. Throughout the episode, they share practical perspectives, stressing the importance of open communication to navigate challenges related to trust. Tune in to unravel the layers of trust and its pivotal role in the journey of love and commitment.
Key Points:
The hosts emphasize the time it takes to develop trust, highlighting that true trust often takes years to develop, as supported by research findings.
Aleeza and Rabbi discuss the correlation between commitment and the growth of trust, emphasizing that trust evolves with the level of commitment within the relationship.
The impact of personal insecurities and past traumas on the timeline for establishing trust is addressed, with the hosts stressing the importance of open communication to navigate these challenges.
Throughout the episode, practical perspectives are shared, shedding light on the significance of consistency, reliability, vulnerability, and personal integrity in building trust within relationships.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Welcome back to another episode of Matchmaker Matchmaker, where Rabbi and Aleeza discuss whether women fall in love faster than men. They challenge this common assumption, sharing personal stories and emphasizing the importance of clear communication in relationships. The hosts also touch on the role of matchmakers in guiding relationship milestones and share insights into surprise proposals.
Key Points:
Challenging Traditional Assumptions: Rabbi and Aleeza question the belief that women fall in love faster than men, offering personal stories that challenge this idea.
Redefining Love: The hosts advocate for a more intentional and proactive approach to emotional connection, emphasizing growth and mutual understanding over the terminology of "falling in love."
The Role of Communication: Stressing the importance of open communication in relationships, the hosts share personal stories to highlight understanding each other's perspectives and preferences.
Proposal Insights: Rabbi and Aleeza discuss surprise proposals, emphasizing the significance of understanding individual preferences and the potential role of matchmakers in guiding relationship milestones.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Join us today on the Matchmaker Matchmaker podcast as Aleeza and Rabbi discuss the common doubts and challenges individuals face in finding the right partner. They explore the importance of asking the right questions and reframing the search for love. The conversation also goes into the significance of non-negotiables in relationships and the varied importance of specific traits in different individuals' search for a partner.
Key Points:
Aleeza and Rabbi emphasize the need to reframe one's mindset from "Is there something wrong with me?" to more proactive inquiries when searching for a partner.
The speakers discuss the concept of non-negotiables in relationships, highlighting the difference between essential traits and desirable bonuses in a potential partner.
They share insights into recognizing the existence of desired traits in others and the common experiences of individuals who struggle to find someone who embodies the qualities they seek.
The discussion also touches on the role of humor and compatibility in relationships, shedding light on the varied importance of specific traits in different individuals' search for a partner.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
In this episode, Aleeza and Rabbi discuss the common scenario of being mistaken for being married and how to respond to such assumptions. They share playful and humorous ways to handle these situations, emphasizing the importance of using humor to break the ice and creating relational opportunities. relationship status.
Key Points:
Using Humor: Aleeza and Rabbi advocate for responding to assumptions about being married with playful and humorous remarks, utilizing humor to diffuse tension and create a lighthearted interaction.
Relational Opportunities: The hosts emphasize the abundance of relational opportunities in everyday life, from nonverbal interactions to casual conversations, highlighting the potential for unexpected connections in daily encounters.
Embracing Playfulness: They encourage listeners to embrace humor and playfulness in responding to assumptions, viewing such moments as opportunities for engagement and connection.
Positive Responses: Aleeza and Rabbi stress the importance of responding in a way that promotes positivity and opens the door to potential connections, emphasizing the value of seizing relational opportunities in various interactions.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Join us In this episode of Matchmaker Matchmerk where your hosts, Aleeza and Rabbi discuss the challenging task of rejecting someone kindly in dating situations. They explore the use of technology, particularly Chat GPT, as a means to craft considerate rejections while emphasizing the ethical and responsible use of such tools.
Key Points:
Challenges of Kind Rejection: Discussion on the difficulties of conveying rejection kindly without being overly blunt.
Role of Matchmakers: Exploring the potential role of a matchmaker in handling rejections in the dating process.
Technology as a Communication Tool: Exploring the use of technology, particularly Chat GPT, as a helpful tool in communicating sensitive messages, emphasizing the ethical and responsible use of such tools.
Ethical Considerations in Technology Use: Touching on the ethical considerations when leveraging technology in the dating and rejection process, integrating modern tools with traditional values within the context of Judaism.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Join us this week in the Matchmaker Matchmaker Podcast, where Rabbi and Aleeza discuss a listener's question that's all too familiar: Am I in the friend zone? They unpack what it means to be in the friend zone, the signs to look out for, and how to deal with the uncertainty of a relationship that might be stuck in friendship territory. Whether it's fear of ruining a good friendship or simply not feeling the spark, our hosts share their views on how to work this tricky situation.
Key Points:
The 'Friend Zone' Reality: Discussing whether true friendships can stay just that or if they're always a stepping stone to romance.
Friendship as a Relationship Cornerstone: Exploring how friendships can be the starting point for a strong romantic relationship.
Taking Chances Beyond Friendship: The pros and cons of moving past the friend zone and how to take that leap.
Deciding Between Friendship and Romance: Advice on choosing whether to pursue a romantic relationship with a friend or to keep the friendship as it is.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Welcome to another episode of the Matchmaker Matchmaker podcast, where your hosts, Jewish matchmakers Aleeza and Rabbi, go into the intricacies of dating and relationships within the Jewish community. Today's question comes from a listener who is perplexed by her date's annoying habits, such as repetitive phrases, and his decision-making, like letting her walk home alone and splitting the bill for coffee. Is she being too picky, or are these legitimate concerns? Aleeza and Rabbi dissect these behaviors, offering insights into communication, social etiquette, and when to speak up in a budding relationship.
Key Points:
Communication Habits: The conversation opens with the issue of repetitive phrases. Aleeza suggests that it could be a self-soothing mechanism for nervousness, while Rabbi points out the possibility of the date being oblivious to social cues. They both agree that it's something that can be worked on, especially if it's just a symptom of initial dating jitters.
Safety and Courtesy: The man's decision not to walk the listener home after a late-night date sparks a debate about safety and common courtesy. Aleeza firmly believes in the responsibility of companions to look out for each other's safety, while Rabbi discusses how direct communication could solve this concern.
Splitting the Bill: Aleeza and Rabbi explore the complexities of splitting the bill. They recognize that while this might be a contentious issue, it's important to understand each other's perspectives and expectations. It could also be an indicator of deeper values and how they align.
Focus on the Positives and Deal-Breakers: Rabbi emphasizes the importance of weighing the good against the bad. If the listener finds more positives in the relationship, it may be worth addressing these concerns directly. Aleeza advises that if the negatives are too overwhelming, it might be a sign to reassess the potential of the relationship. -
Jump right into this episode where Rabbi and Aleeza get real about a question many of us have after a date: why don't they call back like they said they would? They break down the reasons behind the silence after a date and get into the nitty-gritty of dating do's and don'ts today.
Episode Highlights:
Spotting the Signs: Aleeza gives it to you straight on how to tell if someone's just being nice or if they're actually into you.
Not About You: Rabbi chimes in to say that sometimes it's not your fault at all – the other person might have their own stuff going on.
Who Should Call Who?: They hash out if it's cool to stick with the old ways where guys make the first move, or if it's time to shake things up.
Don't Give Up: They both agree – keep on dating and don't get down when things don't work out. The right one will come along and make the effort.
Got ghosted? Confused by mixed messages? Rabbi and Aleeza have got some stories, advice, and a good dose of humor for you. Tune in to get the lowdown on why that second date might not be happening, and why that's totally okay.
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
In this episode of Matchmaker Matchmaker, Rabbi and Aleeza discuss the impact of the October 7th massacre on the Jewish community's approach to dating. They go into the heightened urgency and motivation to find a life partner following the tragic event, comparing it to the sense of urgency felt during the COVID-19 pandemic. The hosts explore how this event has led to a shift towards a more focused and intentional search for a Jewish life partner, noting changes in the diaspora and Israel. They also touch on the challenges faced in Israel due to the ongoing crisis and innovative ways individuals are seeking connections, offering a shared blessing for listeners to find their soulmates amidst these challenging times.
Key Points:
- The profound impact of the October 7th massacre on the Jewish community's approach to dating
- Comparison of urgency post-massacre to the urgency felt during the COVID-19 pandemic
- Shift towards a more focused and intentional search for a Jewish life partner
- Challenges faced and innovative ways of seeking connections in the Jewish community, particularly in Israel
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast
#JewishDatingShifts
#CommunityReflections
#DatingPostTragedy
#NavigatingChange
#LoveAmidstChallenges -
In this episode, Rabbi and Aleeza discuss the importance of dressing for dates and share their perspectives on finding the right balance between personal style and making a positive impression. They share personal experiences and provide practical tips for choosing an outfit that reflects your true self and matches the dating environment. The key topics covered in this episode include:
- The significance of dressing in a way that represents your regular self
- The impact of attire on creating the right impression
- How to integrate self-expression while being mindful of the dating context
- Discussing the appropriate time to showcase different sides of your personality
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Aleeza and Rabbi are back for another episode of Matchmaker Matchmaker this week. They're tackling a listener's question: "What's the difference between a good guy and a kind guy?" They explain that a good guy is not only nice but also has a fun and engaging personality and is genuinely interested in getting to know people. On the other hand, a kind guy is someone who is simply nice, polite, and agreeable but may not be as interesting or engaging as a good guy.
Check out the video version of this show at https://www.youtube.com/@aleezabenshalom/videos
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast -
Have you ever wondered why divorce rates in the Orthodox Jewish community remain remarkably low? On this weeks episode of the Matchmaker Matchmaker podcast, Rabbi and Aleeza explore this intriguing question, shedding light on the factors that contribute to the resilience of marriages within this community.
Check out the video version of this show at https://www.youtube.com/@aleezabenshalom/videos
To submit your question for a future episode, go to www.MarriageMindedMentor.com/Podcast - Laat meer zien
