Afleveringen
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Hey, all! I know it's been a bit over a month since we last posted. Things have been wild and we still don't know when we'll be back, but we do plan on starting episodes up again as soon as we can. In the meantime, why don't you join us over on Discord at the link below? We love each and every one of you and really miss this. Thank you for being so cool.
—Chris
Pod Sematary Discord: https://discord.gg/fQY2uSRv2Z -
Get more at patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1582134931198615552
CW: Rape, Incest, Suicide, Domestic Violence
It’s Halloween Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey watch some pretty bad Halloween movies, unfortunately. There is yelling.
The Classic Film: Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)
"Six years after Michael Myers last terrorized Haddonfield, he returns there in pursuit of his niece, Jamie Lloyd, who has escaped with her newborn child, for which Michael and a mysterious cult have sinister plans” (IMDb.com). It happened. We've been mostly forgiving of the Halloween sequels, but 6—with its magic runes and nonsense plot—is absolutely the worst.
The Modern Film: Halloween Ends (2022)
"The saga of Michael Myers and Laurie Strode comes to a spine-chilling climax in this final installment of this trilogy” (IMDb.com). Despite giving us something we didn't know we needed (a smiling Laurie Strode), Halloween Ends decides to cap off the entire series by being mostly about some brand new character you don't like killing a bunch of other people you don't like.
Audio Sources:
"Awakening: Part 1" (Gargoyles S01E01) produced by Disney Television Animation
"Halloween" (1978) produced by Compass International Pictures, et al.
"Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers" produced by Miramax, et al.
"Halloween Ends" produced by Blumhouse Productions, et al.
"Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" produced by View Askew Productions, et al.
"Léon: The Professional" produced by Gaumont, et al.
"Liar Liar" produced by Universal Pictures & Imagine Entertainment
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
"Split" produced by Universal Pictures, et al. -
Zijn er afleveringen die ontbreken?
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Get more at www.patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1579246708701085696
It’s Hellraiser Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey once again explore the further reaches of experience!
The Classic Film: Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth (1992)
"An investigative reporter must send the newly unbound Pinhead and his legions back to Hell” (IMDb.com). After the initial classic and the better-than-you-might-expect sequel, the scope of the Hellraiser mythos spreads to the city streets, but has the series jumped the shark yet?
The Modern Film: Hellraiser (2022)
"A take on Clive Barker's 1987 horror classic where a young woman struggling with addiction comes into possession of an ancient puzzle box, unaware that its purpose is to summon the Cenobites” (Hulu). A complete refresh of the series, Hulu's Hellraiser joins the small collection of modern reboots that actually aren't that bad.
Audio Sources:
"Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" produced by De Laurentiis Entertainment Group, et al.
"Hellraiser" (1987) produced by New World Pictures, et al.
"Hellraiser" (2022) produced by 20th Century Studios, et al.
"Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth" produced by Fifth Avenue Entertainment & Trans Atlantic Entertainment
"Hellraiser (VNV Nation Remix)" written by Johan van Roy and performed by Suicide Commando
"Jim Gaffigan: Beyond the Pale" produced by Chimichanga Productions, et al. -
Get more at www.patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1577078428536143874
CW: Rape, Sexual Assault, Antisemitism, Racism, Homophobia, Harm to Animals
It’s Psycho Men Week on Pod Sematary and OUR 500th MOVIE!! Chris & Kelsey were going to see a punk show to celebrate but they had to return some video tapes.
The Classic Film: American Psycho (2000)
"A wealthy New York City investment banking executive, Patrick Bateman, hides his alternate psychopathic ego from his co-workers and friends as he delves deeper into his violent, hedonistic fantasies” (IMDb.com). This satirical indictment of 80s yuppie excess and unchecked male aggression certainly goes places, but is one of those places actually... misogyny?
The Modern Film: Green Room (2015)
"A punk rock band is forced to fight for survival after witnessing a murder at a neo-Nazi skinhead bar” (IMDb.com). Anton Yelchin's final theatrical release, Green Room is American History X with more raw violence and none of the histrionics.
Audio Sources:
"American Psycho" produced by Lions Gate Films, et al.
"Green Room" produced by Broad Green Pictures & Film Science
"Nazi Punks Fuck Off" written by Jello Biafra and performed by Dead Kennedys -
Get more at www.patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1574149430466387969
It’s an Addams Family Double Feature on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey gladly feast on those who would subdue them!
The "Original": The Addams Family (1991)
"Con artists plan to fleece an eccentric family using an accomplice who claims to be their long-lost uncle” (IMDb.com). The 90s Addams Family managed to modernize the famous horror brood without losing their wit and bite, but does it still hold up?
The "Remake": The Addams Family (2019)
"The eccentrically macabre family moves to a bland suburb where Wednesday Addams' friendship with the daughter of a hostile and conformist local reality show host exacerbates conflict between the families” (IMDb.com). While showing an occasional glimpse of quality, this Addams reboot is ultimately just a lame Illumination wannabe with often-flat humor and tired jokes.
Audio Sources:
"The Addams Family" (1991) produced by Orion Pictures, et al.
"The Addams Family" (2019) produced by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, et al.
"The Addams Family in New York" (The Addams Family [1973 TV Series] S01E01) produced by Hanna-Barbera Productions
"Children of the Corn" (1984) produced by Hal Roach Studios, et al.
"Frankenstein" (1931) produced by Universal Pictures
"Street Fighter" (1994) produced by Capcom Entertainment, et al.
"Watchmen" (2009) produced by Warner Bros., et al. -
CW: Child Abuse/Molestation, Rape, Suicide
It’s Creepy Bromance Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey have been keeping the wrong sort of friends lately.
The Classic Film: Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer (1986)
"Arriving in Chicago, Henry moves in with ex-con acquaintance Otis and starts schooling him in the ways of the serial killer” (IMDb.com). This first-time outing from John McNaughton is well-directed and features a killer performance from Michael Rooker, but it certainly isn't for everyone. It's what Chris might call "effective stuff" or... "compelling stuff."
The Modern Film: Creep (2014)
"A young videographer answers an online ad for a one-day job in a remote town to record the last messages of a dying man” (IMDb.com). Creep is a testament to what can be made with two buddies and a camera. Accept no excuses from the Thankskillings of the world.
Audio Sources:
"Colonel Homer" (The Simpsons S03E20) produced by Gracie Films & 20th Century Fox Television
"Creep" (2014) produced by Blumhouse Productions & Duplass Brothers Productions
"Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer" produced by Maljack Productions
"My Mistake" written by R. Brandle & P. Petraitis and performed by Lynne and the Lizards
"Peachfuzz Theme (The Heart of a Lion)" written by Mark Duplass & Kyle Field and performed by Little Wings
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts -
Get more at www.patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1569075721519374337
CW: Alcoholism
It’s our second Birthday Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey use a ouija board for their birthdays and resurrect defective children's show animatronics!
The Classic Film: Don't Panic (1987)
"On his seventeenth birthday, Michael unwittingly unlocks the evil forces of a Ouija board” (IMDb.com). Often touted as the Nightmare on Elm Street of Mexico, this wacky "B" movie is pretty bad but in a very charming way.
The Modern Film: The Banana Splits Movie (2019)
"A family attends a live taping of The Banana Splits television series, but are forced to survive as soon as the characters go haywire and start a killing spree around the studio” (IMDb.com). There's a great concept, a lot of practical love, and some admirable spirit in this twisted resurrection of an actual 60s children's show, but while it may be respectable, the end product is not really much to look at.
Audio Sources:
"The Banana Splits Move" produced by Blue Ice Pictures & Blue Ribbon Content
"Don't Panic" produced by Producciones Galubi S.A. de C.V. & Producciones Torrente S.A.
"Don't Panic" (Cover Version) written by Jon Michael Bischof & performed by Tanner Sega (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKtp8k2yrwQ)
"The Lost Boys" produced by Warner Bros.
"Orgazmo" produced by Kuzui Enterprises, et al.
"Total Recall" (1990) produced by Carolco Pictures & Estudios Churubusco Azteca S.A. -
Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1566193505340313600
It’s Birthday Rituals Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey watch some birthday-themed horror centered around sinister rituals for Chris' special day!
The Classic Film: Alison's Birthday (1981)
"A young girl is subjected to a reign of terror so that her soul can be transferred to the body of an old crone” (IMDb.com). Alison's Birthday is an Australian mash-up of concepts from other, better movies, but don't miss the charming forest for the trees.
The Modern Film: Book of Monsters (2018)
"Sophie's 18th birthday becomes a bloodbath when monsters descend upon her house and start to devour the party guests” (Epic Pictures). Book of Monsters is a Kickstarter flick full of nods to horror cliché, but—unlike Alison's Birthday—with none of the charm.
Audio Sources:
"Alison's Birthday" produced by The Australian Film Commission, et al.
"Birthday" written by Lennon–McCartney and performed by The Beatles
"Book of Monsters" produced by Dark Rift Films
"The Fifth Element" produced by Gaumont & Pinewood Studios
"Judge Reinhold/10,000 Maniacs" (Saturday Night Live S13E13) produced by Broadway Video & NBC Productions
"Mad Max" (1979) produced by Kennedy Miller Productions & Mad Max Films
"Math and King Solomon" (from The Top Part) written and performed by John Mulaney
"Rosemary's Baby" (1968) produced by William Castle Productions
"Skorpio" (Archer S01E06) produced by Radical Axis
"Stonehenge" written by Christopher Guest, et al., and performed by Spinal Tap -
Get more at www.patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1564105932811825152
CW: Suicide, Sexual Harassment
It’s Splintered Reality Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey awaken their inner mall goths and get freaky with time and space.
The Classic Film: Donnie Darko (2001)
"After narrowly escaping a bizarre accident, a troubled teenager is plagued by visions of a man in a large rabbit suit who manipulates him to commit a series of crimes” (IMDb.com). Donnie Darko is one of Kelsey's all-time faves from her youth, but does it hold up? And should you watch the Theatrical or Director's Cut?
The Modern Film: Coherence (2013)
"Strange things begin to happen when a group of friends gather for a dinner party on an evening when a comet is passing overhead” (IMDb.com). Filmed in the director's house on a micro-budget of $50,000, Coherence shows you can still do big things if you have the right big idea.
Audio Sources:
"Birthday" written by Lennon–McCartney and performed by The Beatles
"Bitch" (Key and Peele S01E01) produced by Monkeypaw Productions, et al.
"Coherence" produced by Bellanova Films & Ugly Duckling Films
"Donnie Darko" produced by Flower Films, et al.
"Head over Heels" written by Roland Orzabal & Curt Smith and performed by Tears for Fears
"The Killing Moon" written by Will Sergeant, et al., and performed by Echo and the Bunnymen
"Love Will Tear Us Apart" written by Ian Curtis, et al., and performed by Joy Division
"Notorious" written by Simon Le Bon, et al., and performed by Duran Duran
"Serious Night Live - SNL" via Saturday Night Live @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ED1I3yIoz0
"When the Lights Go Out" written by Eliot Kennedy, et al., and performed by Five
"Wonderboy" written by Jack Black & Kyle Gass and performed by Tenacious D
"Zack Snyder's Justice League" produced by Warner Bros., et al. -
Get more at www.patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1561549628025147393
CW: Suicide, Rape, Rape Culture
It’s Back-to-School Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey pledge school societies where they live by the melodrama and die by the melodrama.
The Classic Film: The Skulls (2000)
"For Luke McNamara, an invitation to join the prestigious secret college organization, The Skulls, is a dream come true, until murder befalls another student” (Mill Creek Entertainment). The Skulls is not a horror movie, sorry. Instead, it's Baby's First Thriller, like a novel adapted into a children's picture book. But if you stick it out, the extreme goofiness might be enough to have you thinking it's so bad that it's good.
The Modern Film: Initiation (2020)
"Whiton University unravels the night a star-athlete is murdered, kicking off a spree of social media slayings that force students to uncover the truth behind the school's hidden secrets and the horrifying meaning of an exclamation point” (IMDb.com). Initiation is a strikingly shot and acted drama going through a pretty paint-by-numbers horror plot that becomes a mishmash of incredible, mediocre, and even inept moments, making it difficult to recommend despite being... kinda good, I guess?
Audio Sources:
"12 Angry Men" (1997 TV Movie) produced by MGM Television
"Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" produced by De Laurentiis Entertainment Group, et al.
"Black Christmas" (1974) produced by Film Funding Ltd. of Canada, et al.
"The Faculty" (1998) produced by Dimension Films & Los Hooligans Productions
"The Fast and the Furious" (2001) produced by Universal Pictures, et al.
"Initiation" produced by Shatterproof Films
"The NeverEnding Story" produced by Constantin Film, et al.
"Not Another Teen Movie" produced by Columbia Pictures, et al.
"Showdown" written by Jeff Lynne and performed by the Electric Light Orchestra
"The Skulls" (2000) produced by Universal Pictures, et al. -
Get more at https://www.patreon.com/podsematary!
Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1559333171828641795
CW: Homophobia, Harm to Animals
It’s Predator vs. Prey Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey get to the choppah!
The Classic Film: Predator (1987)
"A team of commandos on a mission in a Central American jungle find themselves hunted by an extraterrestrial warrior” (IMDb.com). Crossover classic Predator is the best of both worlds: 80s Action and Killer Monster Horror. If you like both of these things, you'll enjoy Predator. If you don't like either... you'll still enjoy Predator.
The Modern Film: Prey (2022)
"Naru, a skilled warrior, fights to protect her tribe against one of the first highly-evolved Predators to land on Earth” (IMDb.com). Prey may lay... it on thick, but isn't that was Predator movies are for? Either way, it's still the best entry since the original.
Audio Sources:
"The Beginning: Making Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace" produced by Lucasfilm Ltd.
"Coneheads" produced by Paramount Pictures
"Hackers" produced by United Artists & Suftley
"Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone" produced by Warner Bros., et al.
"Predator" (1987) produced by Twentieth Century Fox, et al.
"Prey" (2022) produced by 20th Century Studios & Davis Entertainment
"Showdown" written by Jeff Lynne and performed by the Electric Light Orchestra
"Terminator 2: Judgment Day" produced by Carolco Pictures, et al.
"Voice of Optimus Prime is also The Predator (vocalizations by Peter Cullen)" via TFcon @ https://youtu.be/gpjhI-eRE6c -
Get more at patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1556480922513391616
CW: Rape
It’s Matrimony Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey went to a wedding this weekend, so they're in the mood... for wedding-themed horror!
The Classic Film: Hatchet for the Honeymoon [Il rosso segno della follia] (1970)
"A cleaver-wielding bridal designer murders various young brides-to-be in an attempt to unlock a repressed childhood trauma” (IMDb.com). Hatchet for the Honeymoon may not be Bava's best-known work, but if you're a fan of giallo (or American Psycho), you might not want to miss it.
The Modern Film: Ready or Not (2019)
"A bride's wedding night takes a sinister turn when her eccentric new in-laws force her to take part in a terrifying game” (IMDb.com). Ready or Not asks a lot of the viewer, but if you can put up with the silliness, there's a lot to love about it.
Audio Sources:
"Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" produced by De Laurentiis Entertainment Group, et al.
"Cabin in the Woods" produced by Lionsgate, et al.
"Double Team" written and performed by Tenacious D
"Dumb and Dumber To" produced by Universal Pictures, et al.
"Hatchet for the Honeymoon" produced by Pan Latina Films, et al.
"Ready or Not" (2019) produced by Fox Searchlight Pictures, et al.
"Ready or Not" written by Nel Ust Wyclef Jean, et al., and performed by Fugees
"Run Rabbit Run" written by Ralph T. Butler & Noel Gay and performed by Flanagan and Allen -
Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1554240987651665920
CW: Suicide, Rape, Homophobia, Child Abuse
It’s Serial-Kidnappers-in-Masks Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey talk to strangers... and dead kids!
The Classic Film: Kiss the Girls (1997)
"Police hunting for a serial kidnapper are helped when a victim manages to escape for the first time” (IMDb.com). Despite its status as the first film appearance of Doctor/Detective Alex Cross, Kiss the Girls is still just one of a slew of mediocre, serial-killer thrillers churned out by the 90s.
The Modern Film: The Black Phone (2021)
"After being abducted and locked in a soundproof basement, a 13-year-old boy starts receiving calls on a disconnected phone from the killer's previous victims” (IMDb.com). A recent critical darling of the genre, Joe Hill and Scott Derrickson's The Black Phone is pretty compelling... if a tad overrated.
Audio Sources:
"American History X" produced by New Line Cinema, et al.
"The Black Phone" produced by Blumhouse Productions, et al.
"Boombastic" written by Orville Burrell, et al., and performed by Shaggy
"Deadpool" produced by Twentieth Century Fox, et al.
"Kiss the Girls" produced by Paramount Pictures & Rysher Entertainment
"Leonardo Leonardo Returns and Dante Has an Important Decision to Make" (Clerks S01E01) produced by View Askew Productions, et al.
"The Little Mermaid" produced by Walt Disney Pictures, et al.
"Robin Hood: Men in Tights" produced by Brooksfilms & Gaumont
"The Sixth Sense" produced by Spyglass Entertainment, et al. -
Get more at patreon.com/podsematary! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1552106330491461634
CW: Sexual Harassment, Sexual Assault
It’s Undying Ladies Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey go on a hike, meet some dead celebrities, and learn to flamingo dance.
The Classic Film: Death Becomes Her (1992)
"When a fading actress learns of an immortality treatment, she sees it as a way to outdo her long-time rival” (IMDb.com). Death Becomes Her was unfairly maligned in its day, despite including three fantastically comic performances and a darkness that isn't depressing.
The Modern Film: Life After Beth (2014)
"A young man's recently deceased girlfriend mysteriously returns from the dead, but he slowly realizes she is not the way he remembered her” (IMDb.com). Life After Beth is a weird one—it's very clever and has a stacked cast, but it's somehow also difficult to recommend?
Audio Sources:
"Death Becomes Her" produced by Universal Pictures
"Forrest Gump" produced by Paramount Pictures, et al.
"Forever Young" written by Jim Cregan, et al., and performed by Rod Stewart
"Life After Beth" produced by Abbolita Productions, et al.
"The Stand" (1994 TV Miniseries) produced by Greengrass Productions & Laurel Entertainment Inc.
"Spaceballs" (The Movie) produced by Brooksfilms & Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer -
Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1549195416930885632
CW: Suicide, Sexual Assault, Sexual Harassment, Homophobia
It’s Meta Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey are self-referential and silly. Don't think too hard about it.
The Classic Film: Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)
"The Gremlins are back, and this time, they've taken control of a New York City media mogul's high-tech skyscraper” (IMDb.com). Gremlins 2 was a too-late sequel to a pop culture phenomenon that didn't feel like the original at all. But if you can get over that, it sure is a lot of stupid fun.
The Modern Film: The Final Girls (2015)
"A young woman grieving the loss of her mother, a famous scream queen from the 1980s, finds herself pulled into the world of her mom's most famous movie. Reunited, the women must fight off the film's maniacal killer” (IMDb.com). The Final Girls is a love letter to—not a takedown of—slasher films from the 80s. The logic may not work, but who cares, really?
Audio Sources:
"Bette Davis Eyes" written by Donna Weiss & Jackie DeShannon and performed by Kim Carnes
"Cherry Pie" written by Jani Lane and performed by Warrant
"The Final Girls" (2015) produced by Groundswell Productions
"Gremlins" produced by Warner Bros. & Amblin Entertainment
"Gremlins 2: The New Batch" produced by Warner Bros. & Amblin Entertainment
"Hollywood Sequel Doctor" (Key and Peele S05E08) produced by Monkeypaw Productions, et al.
"Joker" (2019) produced by Warner Bros., et al.
"Looper" (2012) produced by TriStar Pictures, et al.
"My Name is Bruce" produced by Dark Horse Entertainment & Image Entertainment
"Spaceballs" produced by Brooksfilms & Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer -
Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1546314325794508800
CW: Child Abuse, Harm to Animals
It’s Firestarter Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey try a double helping of the Stephen King adaptation and start bleeding from all sorts of places.
The Original: Firestarter (1984)
"A couple who participated in a potent medical experiment gain telepathic ability and then have a child who is pyrokinetic” (IMDb.com). Some wonky bits aside, an absolutely stacked cast turns out one of (in our minds) the actually good Stephen King adaptations.
The Remake: Firestarter (2022)
"A young girl tries to understand how she mysteriously gained the power to set things on fire with her mind” (IMDb.com). Compared to the book and the original film, this remake just doesn't stand up. But if you watch it first, you may think it's alright.
Audio Sources:
"Firestarter" (1984) produced by Dino De Laurentiis Company & Universal Pictures
"Firestarter" (2022) produced by Blumhouse Productions, et al.
"Firestarter" written by Liam Howlett, et al., and performed by The Prodigy
"Hot Cold Sodas and Cold Hot Popcorn" by Nuthacker
"The Langoliers" (1995 TV Miniseries) produced by Laurel Entertainment Inc., et al.
"Old School" produced by Dreamworks Pictures & The Montecito Picture Company
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
"Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith" produced by Lucasfilm, et al.
"Stephen King's IT" (1990 TV Miniseries) produced by Green/Epstein Productions, et al. -
Get more at podsematary.com!
Back us at http://patreon.com/PodSematary
Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1543801002284838912
CW: Spousal Abuse, Rape
It’s American Independence Day on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey celebrate the 4th respectfully and neither kick the tires nor light the fires.
The Classic Film: Uncle Sam (1996)
"Desert Storm vet who was killed in combat rises from the grave on July Fourth, to kill the unpatriotic citizens of his hometown, after some teens burn an American flag over his burial site” (IMDb.com). It's better than we ever could have expected, but that can't hide its most egregious sin: Uncle Sam is mostly a boring movie.
The Modern Film: Independence Day: Resurgence (2016)
"Two decades after the first Independence Day invasion, Earth is faced with a new extra-Solar threat. But will mankind's new space defenses be enough?” (IMDb.com). The original is by no means a masterpiece, but it made up for it in charisma. This sequel is just catastrophically bad and there's no amount of well-that-was-kinda-neat-I-guess that can make up for it.
Audio Sources:
"Firestarter" written by Liam Howlett, et al., and performed by The Prodigy
"Independence Day" produced by Twentieth Century Fox & Centropolis Entertainment
"Independence Day: Resurgence" produced by Twentieth Century Fox, et al.
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
"South Park" produced by Braniff, et al.
"Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi" produced by Lucasfilm
"Thank You for Being a Friend" written by Andrew Gold and Performed by Cynthia Fee
"That's My Bush!" produced by Comedy Central, et al.
"Theme from Shaft" composed and performed by Isaac Hayes
"Uncle Sam" produced by A-Pix Entertainment, et al. -
Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1541216980711067648
CW: Rape, Suicide, Transmisogyny
It’s Urban Legends Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey round out the trilogy in a two-for-one episode to surprising results!
The Classic Film: Urban Legends: Final Cut (2000)
"A film school is the center of a fresh spate of killings based on urban legends” (IMDb.com). It may not be a great movie, but is Final Cut our favorite UL? Actually...
The Modern Film: Urban Legends: Bloody Mary (2005)
"...a trio of high school friends chant an incantation, unleashing an evil spirit from the past with deadly consequences” (IMDb.com). While there are one or two things that are moderately cool about this final (for now) installment of the franchise, the fact that we have to say that should tell you everything you need to know. Hard to believe that this is the same director as Pet Sematary and Pet Sematary Two.
Audio Sources:
"Blossom" produced by Touchstone Television, et al.
"Die Hard" produced by Twentieth Century Fox, et al.
"Don't Whiz On The Electric Fence!" written and performed by Charlie Brissette, et al.
"A Goofy Movie" produced by Walt Disney Pictures, et al.
"Half Baked" produced by Robert Simonds Productions & Universal Pictures
"Hook" produced by Amblin Entertainment & TriStar Pictures
"Labyrinth" produced by The Jim Henson Company, et al.
"Pet Sematary" produced by Paramount Pictures & Laurel Productions
"Scream" produced by Dimension Films & Woods Entertainment
"Urban Legend" produced by Phoenix Pictures, et al.
"Urban Legends: Bloody Mary" produced by NPP Productions Inc. & Screen Gems
"Urban Legends: Final Cut" produced by Phoenix Pictures, et al.
"You Don't Have to Say You Love Me" written by Vicki Wickham, et al., and performed by Dusty Springfield -
Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1538690146630979589
CW: Rape
It’s Monster Investigations Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey don't blame the actors for this very ranty episode of listener recommendations (Thanks, Aaron & Will!).
The Classic Film: The Night Flier (1997)
"A reporter is on the trail of a vampiric murderer who travels by plane” (IMDb.com). Believe it or not, this Stephen King adaptation starring Miguel Ferrer WASN'T made for TV.
The Modern Film: Digging Up the Marrow (2014)
"A documentary exploring genre-based monster art takes an odd turn when the filmmakers are contacted by a man who claims he can prove that monsters are indeed real” (IMDb.com). Surprisingly, Adam Green's acting isn't all that bad (neither is Ray Wise's), and almost all of the monster effects are really cool. Unfortunately, that's about where the praise for this mockumentary-cum-advertisement stops.
Audio Sources:
"Digging Up the Marrow" produced by ArieScope Pictures
"The Night Flier" produced by Night Flier Productions, et al.
"Thinner" produced by Paramount Pictures & Spelling Films
"Vampire's Kiss" produced by Hemdale & Magellan Pictures -
Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1536176582443732992
CW: Rape, Abuse of a Child with Disabilities, Harm to Animals
It’s Father's Day on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey get back-alley plastic surgery and second families. Look, it's all very confusing.
The Classic Film: Stepfather 3: Father's Day (1992)
"That psycho stepfather has escaped from the insane asylum and had his face surgically altered. Now he's married again, this time to a woman with a child in a wheelchair. He goes on a killing spree once again” (IMDb.com). It's Stepfather again, only cringier and even more prudish, and this time we don't even get Terry O'Quinn. It's the epitome of the unnecessary sequel.
The Modern Film: The Wailing (2016)
"Soon after a stranger arrives in a little village, a mysterious sickness starts spreading. A policeman, drawn into the incident, is forced to solve the mystery in order to save his daughter” (IMDb.com). The Wailing is a beautiful and very well-made but entirely too long movie with, ultimately, not a lot to say of substance about its subjects of choice.
Audio Sources:
"Eat Like an American" (from "Beyond the Pale") written and performed by Jim Gaffigan
"Happy Together" written by Gary Bonner & Alan Gordon and performed by the Turtles
"Hellraiser" (1987) produced by New World Pictures, et al.
"Jacob's Ladder" (1990) produced by Carolco Pictures
"Skyfire Cycle" (Brooklyn Nine-Nine S04E08) produced by Fremulon, et al.
"Stepfather" (1987) produced by Incorporated Television Company
"Stepfather 3" produced by Incorporated Television Company & Trimark Pictures
"The Wailing" produced by Fox International Production, et al.
"Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory" produced by Wolper Pictures - Laat meer zien
