Afleveringen
-
Do you want your marriage… or do you just WANT to want it? This is an important distinction (and something I teach inside my membership program: The Decision).
In this episode of the podcast, I share the story of Sue: She’s got the “perfect” marriage… but she’s unhappy with it. I talk about why this might be, plus how she can take steps to fix the problem.
Whether or not you relate to Sue’s problem of the “perfect” marriage, I think you’ll find these clarifying questions VITAL to your own relationship dilemma… listen in to find out!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODEIf you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
Most people in the world will never have the marriage they want… but what about you?
If you’ve been listening to this podcast for any length of time, you know a fair number of things you can do differently. But listening to new information is only part of the equation.
What’s your next step?
In this episode, I’ll explain why it might be time to embody the tools you’re learning (plus, how to get started!)
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODEIf you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
Zijn er afleveringen die ontbreken?
-
Just one generation ago (and even for many of us now), SEX was considered a taboo topic of conversation… even though we’ve all been told to expect less sex the longer we’re married.
So… what exactly happens to intimacy the longer we stay in committed partnerships? In this episode, I’ll explain why desire wanes the longer we’re married and what to do to prioritize YOUR pleasure.
Because the problem of a sexless marriage does not resolve on its own, and the solution requires effort (from both parties).
0:30 - What happens to your sex life the longer you’re married6:25 - When having sex feels like betraying YOURSELF10:22 - Women & sexual pleasure within marriage17:46 - If you want to enjoy sex, you have to enjoy yourself20:20 - But there’s no magic equation…
You'll Learn:Mentioned In This Episode:
If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
Difficult conversations are bound to happen in your most intimate relationships - whether you’re prepared or not. This episode will teach you how to have PRODUCTIVE conversations about difficult topics.
You’ll also learn why we avoid conflict in the first place, how to stop pretending things are “fine,” and the three parts to communication you need to know.
1:26 - How we avoid conflict (and why it doesn’t work)4:27 - What works for women… but not for men9:09 - What might happen if you tell your partner THIS?14:29 - This will change your experience of difficult conversations
YOU'LL LEARN
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODEIf you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
Is it time to pump the brakes on your affair relationship? How do you know if your secret partnership can last beyond the affair?
Whatever happens after your affair relationship, I want you to be prepared - whether you stay with your affair partner or not.
It starts with recognizing these 4 Red Flags you might be missing in your affair partner.
0:28 - Why we overlook bad behavior from our affair partner4:50 - Red Flag - Does he feel entitled to you? 7:57 - Red Flag - Is his control & manipulation just hidden? 10:13 - Here’s the reality (for YOU and your affair partner)
What You'll LearnMentioned In This Episode
If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
“I had one foot out the door… but pretending otherwise only led to greater disconnection and resentment.” - Sharon Pope
This is a soulful revelation for anyone who’s given up on the evolution of their marriage. I stopped trying when things got hard in my first marriage - and there’s just ONE thing I’d do differently.
In this episode, you’ll hear me talk about the main reasons women stop trying, what to do if you feel like giving up (OR if you’ve already given up) - plus the root cause of resentment in relationships.
4:27 - After 10 years, I just gave up trying5:01 - Here’s my ONE regret7:10 - If YOU feel like you’d rather give up than try again… 12:06 - Here’s what I want you to think about
WHAT YOU'LL LEARN
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODEIf you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
“How do I compromise with a partner who I no longer respect? How can I increase my respect for him… without lowering my standards?”
In this episode, I’m answering a question from one of our podcast listeners about what she can do differently or better to build back trust with her partner - after it’s been lost.
You’ll learn 4 practical steps you can take, including whether and how to compromise, plus where to put your focus as you move forward.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
If it’s the fear of what might happen on the OTHER side of divorce that’s keeping you stuck, this episode is for you! I’m joined by leading Family Law Attorney & Mediation expert, Susan Guthrie, to discuss exactly what to consider when you’re stuck in the decision to “stay or go.”
And I have to tell you: Susan shared advice that I wasn’t expecting!
You'll Learn:
5:29 - People are often better off in their “beyond”
12:35 - Divorce will be one of the most stressful events in your life, BUT…
16:30 - How to avoid regret on the other side
19:32 - High emotions don’t make the best cocktail for rational thinking
26:20 - The best $$ you’ll ever spend during your divorce
30:21 - You don’t have to villainize your ex-partner - in fact, you shouldn’t
37:03 - Life after divorce is not actually the big black hole of a future you imagine
41:33 - You will become a different person as you heal
50:38 - What will really matter a few years from now…
Mentioned In This EpisodeIf you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
If you’ve ever wondered whether your marriage (and your life) would be better if you JUST had the “right” partner… this episode is for you.
This romantic idea that the “right” person is always easy to love is what’s ruining our ability to thrive within marriage! And I want to talk about it.
In this episode, I’ll explain the problem with our unrealistic expectations, the reason your partner might not be “easy” to love, and why we get stuck in “the honeymoon phase.”
“Compatibility is an achievement of love; it shouldn’t be its pre-condition.” - Alain de Button
3:06 - Is your relationship transactional OR growth-oriented? 5:54 - THIS is the person best-suited to you… 8:35 - If your marriage feels doomed, consider your expectations10:01 - No one is easy to love… even you
What You'll Learn in This EpisodeMentioned in this Episode
If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
How do you navigate divorce when you have a strong faith (and a strong desire for the “traditional” family)? What happens when you divorce “the nice guy” and become the villain?
Today on the podcast, I’m speaking with special guests Noam Raucher & Leeron Tal, co-hosts of The Jewish Divorce Podcast, about their personal journeys through divorce, plus the different ways men & women interpret confrontation and “fighting,” why we so often feel unprepared for the reality of marriage, and the additional pressures of marriage (and divorce) when you have a strong faith.
You’ll also hear us talk about what makes a marriage “successful” (besides longevity) and what Noam and Leeron wish they’d known before going through divorce…
“As a Rabbi, I have to remind myself and the people I serve: Our ‘mistakes’ make us more human.” - Noam Raucher
You'll Learn:
2:44 - “Everything in my life was great… except my marriage.”
6:45 - Her a-ha moment happened when she realized: Her kids were scared
11:31 - Marriage felt like his next “right” step
15:01 - He was surprised when his ex asked for a divorce
17:02 - Men & women perceive confrontation (and fighting) differently
21:02 - What it feels like to “wobble” in your decision
26:16 - The pressure of marriage & divorce when you have a strong faith
30:55 - When you’re going through divorce & it feels too hard to talk with other couples
34:10 - We need a new ‘success’ marker than longevity…
37:01 - What do Noam & Leeron wish they’d known before divorce
39:54 - More information about The Jewish Divorce Project podcast (& more!)If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
How can he have an affair if he truly loves me? Should I tell my best friend about his betrayal? Why do men cheat (and what defines cheating)?
In this episode, I’m answering these questions (and more) from real listeners who’ve recently discovered their partner’s betrayal.
I cover everything from how both partners can get support to what’s required if you choose to stay together - plus the reason I think every married couple should have a conversation about betrayal (even if there hasn’t been one yet).
If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
Every woman I know has felt some level of shame for showing emotion… and on every end of the spectrum. Deep grief, anger, even pure joy.
In this episode, I’m talking about the importance of understanding your emotions for a healthy, intimate relationship.
You’ll learn about the wide range of emotions we have access to (but why we’re only familiar with a handful), how your avoidance of emotion is keeping you stuck in indecision about your marriage, plus the two options you have when it comes to uncomfortable emotions - including heartbreak.
What You'll Learn:
1:10 - From positive to negative emotions… where’s your “home base” emotion?
5:01 - Why we avoid emotions & shame people who show them
7:06 - Your emotions offer important guidance about what’s for you… and not for you
10:00 - What this means for your most intimate relationship
13:24 - Are you trying to avoid heartbreak? (Is that possible?)
15:03 - You have two options
17:09 - THIS is the price of a life well-lovedMentioned In This Episode
If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
“My kids are so lucky [that I] have Sharon [...] I would never have done this [so peacefully] without her.” - Tania
I have something extra special to share with you this week… Three of my long-time members from inside The Decision are sharing their real-life stories from the other side of divorce.
Charles, Rachel, and Tania have been part of my membership program for more than three years, and together we have an important conversation about the opportunity for personal growth after an affair, what it’s like to “nest” with your ex-partner, and how to care for & develop yourself through the process of divorce - and after!
This is a beautiful conversation (originally ONLY offered as a *bonus* call with other members inside the program!) But I invite you to listen to this candid back-and-forth to hear what it might be like from the other side of what you’re considering right now…
Please Note: This episode was originally recorded as a *bonus* call inside The Decision. Charles, Rachel, and Tania agreed to share their stories publicly on the podcast. Enjoy!
Mentioned In This Episode
The Decision Membership program :: https://thedecisionmembership.com/If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
Love is pain… and if you don’t want to feel pain, you should just give up on love, right?
In this episode, I’ll explain where this line of thinking comes from and what happens when our expectations of love and marriage don’t match the reality.
I’ll walk you through the ways that I’ve learned to think about love and marriage relationships, answer the question, “Does the ‘perfect’ soulmate partner exist?” and tell you what to give up on - instead of love.
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
0:55 - I’m never going to tell you to give up on love, BUT…
3:33 - Does the “perfect” partner exist?
5:10 - I think about love & marriage like this
7:39 - Instead of giving up on love, give up on this…
9:22 - The reality of loving someone wellMentioned In This Episode
On Love: A Novel by Alain De BottonIf you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
I get it: You don’t want to regret the choice you make (and you don’t want to make your life worse).
But what happens when we dig into what’s really behind your fear of making a “wrong” decision about your marriage? What happens when you challenge the general opinion that there is a right and wrong step forward - toward deepening your marriage or ending in divorce?
In this episode, we’ll find out! I’m talking about the safety net of indecision, regrets and “what if” thinking, plus the uncomfortable back-tracking that sometimes happens, even after you decide.
What You'll Learn In This Episode:
1:32 - Indecision might be less scary, BUT…
5:49 - What’s “right” and “wrong” for YOU?
7:35 - “WHAT IF… I have regrets later, and I can’t go back?”
9:07 - The most important thing about making a decision…
12:59 - You don’t know what will happen… until you decide
Mentioned In This EpisodeIf you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
The current legal process for divorce is complicated - not to mention expensive. That’s why I invited Erin Levine, Founder of Hello Divorce, to join me today on the podcast.
She’s here to demystify the legal details of separation and explain her 3-step alternative for a simpler, kinder, and less stressful divorce.
We talk about the problems with bringing your divorce to court, how to navigate divorce when you don’t trust your ex, and the “divorce math” you should consider (i.e. it’s not just financially draining). Erin also explains why she’s determined to NEVER again litigate a divorce, plus the most-used service within Hello Divorce - and how it can save you money (and tears!)
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
2:09 - Top 3 problems Erin witnessed within the divorce courts… and what led her to create another option
7:47 - “Conscious Uncoupling” isn’t just hype from Gwenyth Paltrow
12:31 - Remember: the system is set up for lawyers… it’s not designed to support families
20:04 - When the spirit of “making things peaceful” mixes with DISTRUST
23:12 - Hello Divorce breaks down the divorce process into 3 parts
32:51 - Divorce Math: Consider the emotional toll this process takes
37:47 - Your lawyer is not your life coach… but you need additional support!
45:02 - Erin’s advice for keeping the divorce peaceful (even when your spouse isn’t focused on that)About The Guest:
Erin Levine has more than a decade of experience litigating complex family matters in court, but when she saw the need for a kinder, easier, and more affordable pathway through divorce, she set out to revolutionize the broken divorce legal system and founded Hello Divorce: a venture capital-backed and tech-enabled platform that helps separating spouses reorganize their lives and finances with less stress and mess.
Erin is on a mission to help everyone design a better life after divorce. She’s already helped thousands of Americans reorganize their lives and families through the Hello Divorce framework that levels the playing field between spouses, so they can sort things out fairly, avoid missteps, and reimagine their next and best chapter.
Learn more about Erin Levine and Hello Divorce at hellodivorce.com (and on Instagram @hellodivorce).
Mentioned In This Episode
If you've been stuck and struggling in your marriage for years or even decades, and you're serious about finding the confidence, clarity, and peace you desire, it's time to book a truth and clarity session.
Go to clarityformymarriage.com to fill out an application. -
If you want to be truly adored and cherished in your most intimate relationship (as though you are the Queen of his world!) this episode is for you…
Often we say that we want to be treated like a queen… but when it doesn’t happen, we get angry and place blame (or give up the dream).
In this episode, I’ll give you 3 important things to consider if you desire Queendom within your marriage - because it’s possible with a few vital adjustments! I’ll share the first question you need to ask yourself, how you can keep your expectations high (no, really!) - PLUS the 1 thing you need to stop doing to your husband.
Tune in for a quick, deep dive episode for the Queens among us!
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
1:47 - People will meet you at your level of expectation, BUT…
4:49 - If you want to be treated like a Queen, consider starting here
7:42 - Because THIS is the real problem… and a solution!Mentioned In This Episode
Truth & Clarity Session with Sharon -
“What is not Love is always Fear.” -from A Course In Miracles, scribed by Helen Schucman
In other words, the opposite of love is not hate… it’s fear. And we unconsciously live within fear-based decisions when we misunderstand our options!
We have only two: LOVE or FEAR.
So how do we know if we’re making choices based in fear… or with love?
This choice shows up most prominently in our marriage relationships, and in this episode I’ll explain why - plus the question to ask if you’re unsure where your own decisions stem from (and how to do things differently).
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
1:09 - Fear is sneaky, because it’s often unconscious
3:16 - Here’s why it shows up most obviously in our marriages
4:20 - You think it’s love… but is it based in fear?
5:34 - This is everyone’s deepest fear…
6:06 - Why the motivation behind your action is important
7:57 - Here’s what I ask myself when I’m unsure about a decision
Mentioned In This EpisodeTruth & Clarity Session with Sharon
-
Many of my clients come to me saying, “I no longer feel desire for my partner… even though I want to! Intimacy used to feel so different. What’s wrong?”
And well, it’s probably not what you think.
In this episode, I invite you to discover how the thrill of novelty and the excitement of the unknown are essential to your long-term marriage, plus how you can realistically bring these elements back to life, starting today.
Because maybe it’s less about what’s “wrong” with your relationship… and more about what you can do differently.
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
0:59 - You might think THIS is the problem (it’s not!)
2:49 - Here’s the real problem - and it happens to all of us
6:01 - Imagine what it looks like to re-incorporate spontaneity into your marriage
9:25 - But here’s the worst time of day to begin…
11:16 - Here’s what I do to keep desire alive with my husband
12:29 - Why non-sexual touch is vital to revamping desire
Mentioned In This EpisodeTruth & Clarity Session with Sharon
-
How do we move forward together after the discovery of an affair? How do I know he won’t cheat again? What if there’s more sexual indiscretion I just don’t know about (yet)?
In this episode, I’ll share a story from one of my clients: She’s 59 and just discovered her husband’s long-term sexual indiscretion. Now she’s trying to understand what went wrong and how to move forward.
I’ll talk about how we can get introspective (without taking responsibility for something that’s NOT our fault), the importance of being “chosen” by our partners (not merely tied together by convenience or fear), plus the Loving Truth about what’s possible on the other side.
Please note: This is a tender, sensitive topic for those of us who’ve experienced sexual indiscretion within an intimate relationship. When deciding whether to listen to this episode (or select another), I encourage you to keep this in mind and take good care of yourself.
What You’ll Learn In This Episode:
1:16 - She’s 59 and just discovered her husband’s sexual indiscretion
4:22 - When you’ve been cheated on, you need these 2 important things
6:39 - Here’s where he needs to start
13:07 - What does it mean to get “introspective”?
16:18 - Are you brave enough to consider this, too?
20:18 - This is what can happen on the other side!
23:17 - And here’s the loving truth…
Mentioned In This EpisodeTruth & Clarity Session with Sharon
- Laat meer zien
