Afleveringen
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Key Moments:
[05:30] Understanding the Success Trap - How achievement addiction creates a dangerous cycle
[12:45] Breaking Generational Patterns - Why your father's absence affects your parenting
[18:20] The Morning Lesson - A powerful story about teaching discipline to a 4-year-old
[25:15] Practical Solutions - How to break the cycle and create healthy success patterns
Phil shares vulnerable insights about his own journey and provides actionable strategies for entrepreneur dads to maintain their ambition while staying emotionally present for their families.
Learn how to fall in love with the process instead of chasing external validation, and discover why being "successful" might be the very thing keeping you from true fulfillment.
Perfect for ambitious fathers, business owners, and leaders who want to build a legacy without sacrificing their family relationships. This episode provides the wake-up call and practical blueprint needed to break free from the success trap and create meaningful connections with your children.
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | LinkedIn
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
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In this episode, discover the ONE thing that successful dads protect at all costs—and it’s not money or business growth. Phil dives deep into the silent killers of fatherhood and success, like decision fatigue, emotional detachment, and energy depletion, and explains why energy management is more critical than time management. Learn how to stop giving your family the "leftover" version of yourself, become a high-performance dad, and create a legacy of love and connection.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
(00:00) The Cost of Chasing Success
(01:06) The Importance of Presence
(05:02) Energy Management Over Time Management
(08:29) The Silent Killer: Emotional Detachment
(15:37) Morning Routines for Optimal Energy
(17:27) Protecting Your Family and Yourself
(21:03) Conclusion and Call to Action
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
[00:00:00]I lost my daughter's entire first year chasing money, trying to build business.
But what I actually sacrifice is worth 100x more, infinitely more.
And after coaching men from all over the world, all over the country, different business owners, from different industries, different sized families, I discovered something…
That you'll never be able to get back no matter how much
[00:00:30]
money you make a lot of men chase money business growth.
But at the end of that if you lose it if you lose the real things that are important in this life.
No amount of that money that you made the success that you got will ever be able to help you buy that back.
So in this video, I'm going to show you what successful dads do and what they protect at all costs.
Because I want you to always remember at the end of the day, it doesn't matter how much money you make, it
[00:01:00]
doesn't matter how big of a business you build, if you lose what's really important in this life.
So let's start off with, um, presence, being truly present here in the moment, and presents, gifts, that you give to your family, gifts that you give to your kids.
Now, the biggest thing is, you know, men like to think that, if I give you this one piece of attention, I had a long work day.
I've been hustling my ass off.
I've been building this
[00:01:30]
business, getting that money, whatever the case might be for the family.
If I give you an ounce of patience, that's a present.
That's a gift to you from me.
You're lucky that I'm giving you a gift.
That's how most men think.
What you have to learn how to do is learn how to manage emotions from a level where what happens in your day to day work environment, you don't bring that to the household.
You don't bring that to the home.
By doing
[00:02:00]
that, you can separate business and your personal life, which is what's important.
You have to know when to leave shit at the door.
When you do that, and you're able to do that, you're able to be present.
So when I talk about presence, being here in the moment, being present for your family, that's what I mean.
It's not a gift, it's a state of being.
When you have presence for your family, when you have presence with your children and your marriage, you have a more meaningful life.
[00:02:30]
And that's what makes all the hustle and all the grind worth it.
So stop looking at the time, the patience, the attention you give right there in that one moment that you have as a gift, as a present to the people that you love most.
Because what it's gonna do, it's gonna create some sort of like resentment, right?
Some type of negative animosity feeling.
Because you think your time is so valuable and that
[00:03:00]
you have to give like this short version of yourself, the business owner, CEO, entrepreneurial version of yourself to your kids when they're just asking you to play.
They're just asking you to eat with them, sit at the table with them.
Your wife's just asking for some time, not talking about business, not talking about nothing related to that, but to be with her husband.
Stop looking at that little amount of time, that one minute, two minute, five minutes.
Cause you might think it's a lot of time, but it's just moments.
Stop looking at that.
Like you're giving them a
[00:03:30]
present or a gift just because for that moment you were truly there.
So how do we do this though?
How do we ensure that you can live a life of presence being a state of being?
Um, a lot of people think that they, they don't have enough time, right?
We all have the same 24 hours in day.
Um, What you do.
In those times in that 24 hours is what means the most, right?
So
[00:04:00]
yeah, you can have time management.
Abso-fucking-lutely everybody needs to learn how to manage their time so they can maximize on 24 hours because just cause you think you're hustling for 10, 14 hours in your business doesn't mean it's productive time.
That doesn't mean they're, they're income producing activities.
A lot of the time that's you doing me like miniature tasks that aren't going to create more money for the business, or you're distracting yourself with all of this busy work and you're not actually driving the business forward.
And so you got to ask yourself, “Well, if that's
[00:04:30]
happening, if I am not being able to be focused for that 10 14 hours I say I'm hustling, what's causing me to do that?
What most men don't realize is they have an energy problem.
They try to stretch themselves thin because the world says, well if you work 10 14 hours then you can wear this badge of honor that you're a hustler.
But people that do big business and make a lot of money, it's not about the amount of hours that you
[00:05:00]
work, it's about what's put into those hours.
But.
In order to manage what's put into those hours, what you need instead of time management is called energy management.
Think about it like this, if you had 60 minutes, and you were depleted, you had nothing left in the tank, you're eating like shit, you're not working out, you don't feel connected to your family, everything is basically falling apart.
How lethal do you think you're going to be in that hour, that 60 minutes?
[00:05:30]
Probably not that lethal.
Now, when you think about super energized, you feel the love from your children.
You feel the love from your spouse, your wife.
You feel connected to God.
You meditate.
You spend time with self.
You're fully, fully energized.
What do you think you can do in that 60 minutes?
That same hour that may be the version of you that's got nothing left in the tank.
What do you think the performance difference is going to be?
Very different.
You're going to,
[00:06:00]
you're probably going to break records in that one hour high energy versus doing nothing meaningful in that one hour, no energy.
So now you think about one, two, three, four, five hours of work in that same space, you're going to get a lot of stuff done once you do four, five hours with nothing in the tank, you're not really getting anything done, but it's going to feel like you're putting a lot of time towards the business.
And energetically, what that's going to do is it's going to drain you because now you feel drained in your business, and when you
[00:06:30]
try to go home, you've got nothing to really give to the kids or to your wife, because you're energetically completely drained, and because you're energetically completely drained, emotionally, you've got nothing to give anybody.
And your wife and your kids, they're going to want from you.
They're going to want emotions from you.
They're going to want connection.
But if you have no energy to emotionally connect because you don't have the bandwidth, what happens?
Well, your daughter, your son asks if you can play.
[00:07:00]
And you get short with them, you get pissed off, you get angry, you snap at them.
Because you have no energy to emotionally respond properly to them.
You see what I'm saying?
When your wife, uh, tells you to take out the trash to do the dishes, you pop off on her?
Why?
Because, energetically, you got nothing left.
Energetically, it's going to feel like somebody's trying to take something more from you that you already don't have.
And so emotionally, you're going to put a guard up and now again, you're going to project that onto your wife.
And that's
[00:07:30]
what caused risks in people's marriage.
And what happens is for a lot of business owners, you don't see that as a lot of entrepreneurs, you don't see that you're doing that, but that's what's happening.
So being able to not just manage time, which again is very important. You have to be productive with your time.
Absolutely.
But in order to be productive with your time, you have to learn how to manage your energy.
Cause if I got an hour and you got an hour, I guarantee you I'm not performing somebody in that hour because I keep my state good.
I keep my energy good.
[00:08:00]
And when you guys do that, what it allows you to do again, it allows you to, in business, know how many hours are the most optimal hours you should be hustling, because I can guarantee you in 10 or 14 hours, unless you're doing a push, you're not really being that productive in 10 or 14 hours of hustle.
A couple hours, three to five hours of hyper productivity will probably move the needle more than a whole week of 10 or 14 hour days basically going nowhere.
Over time, what does this do?
If you go the
[00:08:30]
wrong path, which is where a lot of men go, it becomes a silent killer in your life.
What do I mean by that?
Well, it's this thing where men start to detach emotionally from family, from marriage, even from business.
You start to feel less purpose driven.
Every day kind of seems like meaningless, kind of doing the same mundane tasks, not really getting anywhere.
You don't get those dopamine hits from seeing the business grow or to see the next thing kind of evolve because you're doing all the tasks basically that
[00:09:00] aren't going to do anything for the business.
And the reason why this is a silent killer is because most men don't realize this is happening until years go by.
And then they look back on their life and they've put on a fucking dad bod, business hasn't grown, uh, they now have this huge gap inside of their marriage.
Their kids are older now and they don't really want to hang out with dad anymore because dad was never there when they were younger.
So why do we need dad now?
And the mindset, the mentality just completely starts to diminish, starts to go away.
This is
[00:09:30]
where mediocrity starts setting in, complacency starts setting in.
And you got to understand that when.
Time wise, you feel like you're constrained to the business.
Energetically, you feel depleted.
Emotionally, you feel depleted.
Your mind's gonna start going away.
You're not gonna have any space.
You're gonna be, you're gonna have like, what people call a short fuse.
Anything can break you mentally.
Any small thing that's out of place, If your wife asks you to
[00:10:00]
take the trash or do the dishes at the wrong time, you'll pop off.
Your kids ask you to play, or to eat dinner with them at the table, or to brush their fucking teeth, you're gonna pop off on them.
Mentally, you're gonna be broken.
Mentally, you're gonna be weak.
And that's the silent killer because men don't realize when they start being reactive towards life versus proactive.
And again, it's a sequence of things that end up happening that lead to this.
And when that happens and mentally it's like you're fogged mentally,
[00:10:30]
you don't really see the way forward.
You start to get what's called decision fatigue.
Decision fatigue is where there's a time difference between you knowing that maybe there needs to be a decision made to change the trajectory of your life or business and decision fatigue is, I, I, I don't make a decision fast enough because now I don't know if I can trust the decisions that I'm making because look at my track record.
So decision fatigue is the amount of time it takes for you to actually decide and pull the trigger on
[00:11:00]
something and you get fatigued because you're not used to that volume of decisions because you've now made your word not mean anything, right?
When you say you're doing it for your family, you're building this business for your family, and then you take everything out on your family.
Subconsciously or unconsciously, there's a disconnect over time.
Your word starts meaning less to you and because your word means less to you when it's time to decide, make a hard call in business, make a hard call, have a hard conversation with your wife, have, have
[00:11:30]
a true conversation with your kids and open, honest and vulnerable one.
That's probably hard for you.
It's going to be difficult for you to to make a decision on those things.
And because of this decision, see, again, it kind of, it's, it's kind of like a self fulfilling prophecy, right?
Like, it's like, we know what needs to be done to get things to the next level, but because all of these variables start going depleted, depleted, depleted, depleted, we have no time.
Thus, we have no energy.
Thus, we have no emotional connection.
Thus, we have no mental, uh,
[00:12:00]
uh, bandwidth.
Thus, we have decision fatigue.
Everything's depleted.
Everything's on E man.
What is that going to do to your family?
Having to get the leftover versions of you.
This is why a lot of people end up divorced.
This is why, um, a lot of broken families are there.
Men don't know how to step into themselves and break out of that shell, whatever it is.
Because, again, it takes courage to make massive
[00:12:30]
decisions.
Especially after beatdown, and a beatdown of life and in business.
Cause shit's gonna happen boys.
I'm telling you right now, shit's gonna happen.
Um, and when you do that, not just in, in your business, you start living more of a mediocre life.
You may have felt this before, you start going on autopilot.
It's like, it's like you wake up just to know you're gonna hate your day.
And you go about your day just to do the bare minimum.
And you do the bare minimum because you feel like that's all you got in the tank.
And
[00:13:00]
because that's all you got in the tank, by the end of your workday, you feel completely depleted again.
And then you have to give the leftovers that you already don't have to your wife and to your kids.
And even that's pretty shitty for them.
And so you feel more like a shitbag, but you can't tell anybody about that because you're supposed to be strong.
And then you go to sleep unhappy just to wake up tomorrow to do the same thing over and over.
And the mind becomes a zombie.
And then you go on autopilot, and an autopilot can last a couple
[00:13:30]
weeks, a couple months, for a lot of people, a couple fucking years.
And that's not good.
Because while you're figuring your shit out, your wife is deciding if she wants to stay with you or not.
Straight up.
Your kids are already deciding that they don't want you in their life when they're older.
You ever see kids that like never invite their parents out for like holidays, or to birthdays, or to family events, or special moments?
It's because those parents didn't prioritize those moments with them
[00:14:00]
as children.
So it's not natural for those children now as adults, to want their parents to be part of that season in their life.
You see what I'm saying?
So, how you treat and create an environment for your kids now, no matter what the fuck you're doing in life and in business, is what's gonna get them to decide if they want you in their life down the road.
So.
How do we solve this?
How do we protect dads at all costs?
How do we make sure that dads don't go down this rabbit hole?
Especially if you want to just change your family's life.
Especially if you want to do right
[00:14:30]
by your family.
That's usually the starting intention.
And then somehow it gets, like, lost.
Because that same man does not learn how to level up in his own personal development to be able to lead both in business and in family.
You gotta be able to lead not only just in business but also in your household.
It's very important.
And again, especially if you're cut from the same cloth, you may not have had somebody to teach you or guide you.
On how to do this.
Okay. But, but this is why you're listening to this
[00:15:00]
now to make sure you're aware of the possible ramifications of continuing down this path that will not serve your business.
It won't serve your family.
It won't serve your marriage.
It won't serve your relationship with your kids.
So how do we protect you at all costs?
Well, number one, when we talked about in the beginning, right, we got, we got, um, time management, we got energy management, uh, we have mental management, then, um, we have decision management because fatigue and all that good stuff.
So let's start with time.
[00:15:30]
The first thing we have to understand is there's only 24 hours in a day.
So what does that mean?
It's not that we can get more time.
There's no way to actually create more time, but there is a way to make time for things that we want to prioritize and again, it's gonna take a shift from you You're gonna have to get very fucking uncomfortable.
Especially if you've been rocking and rolling the way that you have been up until this point.
So first thing that you got to do is you’ve got to start prioritizing your energy in the mornings.
When you wake up, don't be looking at your phone.
Don't be
[00:16:00]
scrolling through social media.
Don't be checking your emails.
Don't be checking slack.
Don't be doing the work stuff.
The moment you wake up, if your first instinct is to check your phone and start catching up on work, you're wrong.
You have to optimize your energy levels.
What do we do?
Well, number one,
You gotta be journaling.
You gotta get your thoughts, the good, the bad, the fucking ugly, on paper.
Get it out of your mind.
Clear the mind in the morning.
Journal.
A lot of people think this is woo woo, and a lot of people teach it. Woo woo is
[00:16:30]
fuck.
And they tell you that's all you gotta do.
I'm just telling you to optimize energy.
That's what's recommended.
You also pray to God.
Meditate.
Spend time in stillness reflection of self.
That's what you should do in the morning that create, um, more energy for you, more mental space, more clarity.
It gives you a baseline of how to start your day, how to operate throughout your day.
And that sets the tone, how you start your mornings every day.
Is what sets the tone for the rest of the day.
So just keep that
[00:17:00]
in mind.
So you got to optimize what that looks like.
And if that means waking up 30 minutes earlier, an hour earlier than what you normally do to get that time in before the kids wake up before your wife's up, whatever the case might be, get it done.
Because if you don't get it done, then you can't do the next thing.
So first we create time for you.
We create space for you.
You make time for you.
That's the most important thing, okay?
Because if you are the vessel, and you got nothing to give, then your business doesn't grow, your family doesn't grow, nothing else grows.
So you gotta give the vessel time, space, and energy.
[00:17:30]
What that does now, is it helps you look at things from a compartmentalization process, right?
So, when we think about emotions and energy, so, we get you good.
You start operating at a higher frequency.
Now, we have to understand your emotion and your energy.
Throughout the day.
So let's say that we find your optimal time of how much time you got to be hustling not that 10 to 14 Hour bullshit where you know, you're not even being productive.
Figure out how much time is actually productive time making money for your business.
[00:18:00]
Then you can start to allocate “Well, at this point in my day, I know I have this much energy left.
This is what percentage my battery is at.
I need to be able to allocate this amount of energy I have left to end my night.
So I'm gonna take a piece of that.
The rest of that needs to go to my family.”
So every day my family gets an emotional, connected, present version of me.
So that, that emotional block that you give your family, protect that.
So first, we
[00:18:30]
protect you, your mental state, your emotional state in the morning.
We optimize that process, thus giving you more time and space and clarity.
So that way you can construct yourself properly in business, reducing the amount of time of hustle.
Thus, we then look at, okay, how much do you need to actually end your day?
Right?
End of day routine.
That leftover right here is a lot.
You can give your family a lot more of you emotionally.
And because of that, you're good.
Family's good.
Business starts solving itself because business is business, alright?
[00:19:00]
Business is always going to be moving.
You're never going to get to like the perfect point in business.
You gotta remember that.
So now we look at, I'm good.
My family's good.
I'm getting good with God.
I'm getting good with the universe.
Whatever the case might be. I'm spiritually sound.
M\y family's good.
They feel like I'm there.
I'm present.
I'm emotionally available for them.
I'm giving them the best of me.
Not just the breadcrumbs.
What that does is it gives you more connection,
[00:19:30]
spiritual connection, energetic connection, connection to your family, connection to the core of what it is that's going to drive your purpose and the meaning behind your life.
And you got to remember, once you have that connection from that baseline is now when you start to.
After, after a while, okay, don't just do this shit like off the jump.
After a while, you're gonna feel really good, you're gonna feel energized, everything's gonna be feeling predictable as far as your energy levels go, your mental clarity's gonna be good, you don't have decision fatigue, you're making
[00:20:00]
good decisions on a daily basis, you have a solid 1, week track record of doing this.
Now what you do from that same space, you don't jump out of it, now you start making corrections in, in other areas of your life, from that place of power.
That's what we do to protect you.
As the leader of the business, leader of the household, we protect you, which then protects the family, which protects the mission, which protects the foundation, now we correct from this space.
That's power.
[00:20:30]
That way you know you're always going to feel full.
Your family's always going to feel full.
Because at the end of the day, if you lose everything in life, you take care of that home, you take care of that family, that family's always going to take care of you.
So you gotta, you gotta remember that.
And when you start making corrections from that place, remember the whole point of being energetically sound is to look at business from a totally different vantage point than probably what you have been doing.
And when you do that, um,
[00:21:00]
you're just going to start to see differences in your life.
Okay.
So that's what I would focus on if I was you and if this video, if this, if this exercise, if this awareness resonated with you and you're serious about giving your kids, giving your wife, the man that they deserve, I want you to like this video, subscribe to the channel and stay plugged in each week that I'm dropping a new video, drop some comments, drop some, like, give me some
[00:21:30]
feedback.
Tell me what you're doing to implement.
I love to see wins from high performing men who want to do better and actually put in the work, create the time and space to do better and to be better.
Like the video, subscribe to the
[00:22:00]
channel.
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Zijn er afleveringen die ontbreken?
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In this episode of The Phil Bohol Show, Phil breaks down the myth of work-life balance and reveals how chasing this elusive "balance" could be destroying your family's future. Using his own journey of building multiple seven-figure businesses while becoming a father during a global shutdown, Phil uncovers the mental shifts and actionable strategies that allowed him to create generational wealth, strengthen his family bonds, and live with purpose.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
(00:00) Introduction
(00:34) The Myth of Work-Life Balance
(01:33) Personal Journey and Choices
(02:22) The Struggle with Balance
(05:00) Realizations and Shifts
(07:57) Integrating Family and Work
(10:34) Teaching Through Example
(13:48) Application and Morning Rituals
(16:42) Final Thoughts and Call to Action
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
[00:00:00]What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullshit you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:00:30]
Work life balance is a lie that's destroying your family's future. Since the global shutdown a couple of years ago, I've built multiple seven figure businesses while becoming a father twice over. And today I'm going to show you why balance itself is the wrong goal and what to do and what to focus on instead.
So in this video, you're going to learn
[00:01:00]
a couple of things.
First thing is why work life balance is actually hurting your family.
Then I'm going to talk to you about some of the shifts; three shifts I had to make to strengthen the bond and the relationship with my daughters.
How you can continue to build generational wealth, especially if you come from a third world country like me, while being more present and the exact framework I use making
[00:01:30]
multimillion dollar decisions without sacrificing family time.
I just got done playing in the snow with the girls.
When my first daughter Ariella was born, it was the start of the global shutdown and I had a choice to make.
Am I going to live a life of mediocrity and give that to them?
Or am I going to find a way to live a life that most people can only dream of, of excellence,
[00:02:00]
something to be proud of.
This is what I've built.
Coming from a third world country, coming from poverty, I was able to build something like this.
Most people told me that being a new dad is going to be very stressful and you got to take the safe route.
I chose not to take the safe route and we're all better off for it.
But you have to understand that when I tried to go against what was calling to me, that's
[00:02:30]
where I really started to lose myself.
I was so focused on, well, how do I be present with my wife?
She's got the baby in the tummy, baby's on the way.
How do I balance that with work?
And what happened was because I kept listening to the noise of the world, I kept listening to people that were unsuccessful.
In, in, in terms of how I viewed them, I was listening to them and they were pulling me to this, this mediocre state
[00:03:00]
that I needed this balance.
And every time I tried to seek balance, it felt like I went off balance because as business pulled me one direction, I kept going against that, trying to achieve balance.
And because of that, then I would give to my family, but then I'd be so distracted because I wanted a balance.
Thanks.
Working, hustling, building the thing that was going to secure safety and security, especially in a world of chaos, literally world of chaos.
[00:03:30]
And that's the guilt that we can feel as fathers, as entrepreneurs, as business owners, that we're trying our best for our family, but we also have to be present for the family because it kind of doesn't make any sense to say that we're doing all of these things, we're building business, we're making money, we're making changes.
For the family it doesn't really make sense to say that and then on the other side of it not see them to neglect them.
And so you got to understand that you're killing yourself trying to
[00:04:00]
balance this thing when it's not balance that you need.
It's not balance that's gonna get you to break through.
It's not balance that's gonna give you the ability to grow business.
While being present, the more you battle this, the more it's going to hurt.
And the more you do this, the more you're going to be distracted.
You're going to be a state of limbo.
And eventually as your kids grow older,
[00:04:30]
they're still going to feel like they didn't get enough of you.
They didn't get the best of you because while you were in.
When you felt so guilty because you weren't with family that you didn't do the work, you didn't push yourself to achieve greatness.
And when you're with your family, because you weren't pushing yourself to achieve greatness in your business,
You're always distracted with them, and that's not a way to live.
And that's what happens when people try to balance things, work life balance.
[00:05:00]
And the more that I did that, what happened was, I kept having this emotional turmoil, as we led closer and closer to my daughter being born.
And when she was born, man, like…
It felt like I was so behind on building a safety net, a security that the first year I wasn't as present as I am today.
Because now we have another daughter, Alessia, and she just turned one.
And this time around it's very different because of the lessons that I've learned.
So I really want you to pay attention
[00:05:30]
because we never get that time back.
And you gotta start asking yourself, don't you get tired of the guilt trip your wife doesn't give you?
Your kids don't give it to you, but you give you.
You got to shift the mentality because that first year of birth for my first born, and there's a lot of times that I missed because I was so caught up in emotional distress.
I was so caught up in my head that
[00:06:00]
as much as I thought I was present, I wasn't.
And that's why I want you to understand that as you kind of move forward away from the world of work life balance, the more that you kind of think about, well, if I'm going to give time to my family, if I'm gonna give time to my kids, quality.
Which one do I have to choose?
[00:06:30]
Which one do I have to give?
Do I give them quality time, less time, but it's quality time?
Or do I give them quantity time, but less quality because I'm distracted?
See, this is the thing that people think they have to choose from.
Just like work life balance.
Do I have to choose work?
Do I have to choose life?
Do I choose quality?
Do I choose quantity?
It doesn't have to be that way.
There's no choice that has to be made in those spaces, but you have to allow yourself to think differently.
And this is when I started to realize that
[00:07:00]
I was actually holding myself back because I was building
my first business and it required me to be on camera, it required me to be on zoom calls.
They required me to be on phone calls, and I used to feel like I was doing something wrong or I was being unprofessional.
If I had my, my daughter with me or if I had my wife in the background or family was happening behind the scenes.
Then one day I realized why, why am I so worried and concerned about how this looks?
[00:07:30]
My family needs me right now, and if they're walking around behind me, what's so unprofessional about that?
We're in the middle of a global shutdown.
Everybody's remote.
This doesn't make any sense.
Why am I doing this to myself?
Then I started to realize that I was overcomplicating the whole thing.
I was trying to make a choice when no choice had to be made, and that's when I started changing everything.
I started to actually involve
[00:08:00]
my family in during my times of work, but I had to look at things different.
I obviously had to still perform.
I had to put food on the table.
Absolutely.
But what I did was when I made that realization, I stopped trying to balance work and life.
And instead, I started to integrate my family into my purpose.
The thing that, that was calling to me.
I wanted to build a better life for them.
So I involved them more.
I wanted to show them what's
[00:08:30]
possible.
What, what their dad, what their husband was willing to do for them.
So I involved them more.
Everything that I did had to do with my family.
Now I started to understand how to be a family man.
And mind you, I didn't really have that great of an example of what it means for a father to involve his kids like that.
Story for another time, but that's when everything changed.
When you keep choosing and you keep trying to choose.
You're gonna let somebody down.
Think about like this
[00:09:00]
last time you had an email, a slack message, a text message from work and your kids wanted to play.
Were you checking your phone?
Were you thinking about checking your phone?
Were you thinking about work that was potentially gonna hit your phone?
So you had to have it around, you have to just slide it into your pocket while you played and while you were present.
You
[00:09:30]
have to learn a different way.
You gotta learn how to compartmentalize everything.
Because if you learn to compartmentalize, then you can have it all.
Because you're willing to be it all, but you have to stretch yourself more.
Right?
You have to stretch yourself that, if it's not balance that I have to seek, but integration, well, what happens when I start merging work and life?
What does that look like?
Well, now I'm going to have two things emotionally calling to me, one pulling me one direction, one pulling me the other.
How do I not get frustrated at one or the other?
And
[00:10:00]
that's what it means to be a present father.
That's what it means to be a strong man.
It's learning how to operate with those different variables and understanding that at the end of the day, even if that business of yours goes away, your kids, your wife, they will be there.
So show them, if you're working really hard or you're doing a deal or you're growing the business, why not have your son, your daughter there to see you in action?
Because you probably look like a
[00:10:30]
superhero to them if you allow it to be that way.
And the cool part about this is, as Ariella, my four-year-old now, she started getting older.
She has this, um, this little baby phone, this little pink little thing that has a little strap so it doesn't fall off her hand.
And she used to start holding it up to her ear.
And then we realized what she was doing, she was modeling me.
She was closing deals on her phone because I'm a closer.
[00:11:00]
And we didn't know what was happening, she just, she just kept doing this with her phone and she started to emulate what I was doing.
And that's when I realized I was teaching her skill sets without even realizing it.
So every time I was on the phone, every time I was talking with clients, every time I was helping somebody, she would see that as dad helping somebody.
She would see that as dad closing a deal.
She would start to model all of these good things and all these attributes.
I didn't even realize
[00:11:30]
that she, that she was even paying attention to because normally when she's in the office, she's just playing.
But sometimes, just like Todd in the Marine Corps, if you do the right thing even when nobody's watching, you have to understand somebody's always watching at the end of the day.
She's walking in right now.
So, you gotta ask yourself, and you see her running, what if your business can actually make you a better
[00:12:00] father?
What if you could do things like this, and you can have your daughter run into the room, and she just lays there, watching you, seeing what you're doing, what you're creating.
And now she has somebody to model.
She can see your work ethic.
She can hear your message.
She can hear your impact.
[00:12:30]
If only I knew that cause Ariella is the one that ran in here and I didn't really start to understand these lessons until about one to two years of birth.
So I really started to understand that time was moving quick.
I want you to imagine when you integrate work, life, family, and business in the right ways, and you control the chaos, you lead by example.
I want you to imagine your kids seeing the work that
[00:13:00]
you do, the purpose that you're driven by, as part of their legacy.
And not just a distraction.
Do you want to say hi baby?
No.
Too shy?
And if you can understand that, these are things that they're going to take with them.
These are going to be skill sets that she's going to take with her.
She's going to understand
[00:13:30]
how to communicate.
She's going to understand how to carry herself.
She already is comfortable at a desk.
She's already comfortable on camera.
Imagine if as she grows, as your children grow, they have that in their mind as who they remember their father to be.
So let's talk about application.
Let's talk about how you can apply this into your life.
Okay.
The first thing that you have to understand is you have to have a morning ritual.
You have to have the ability to
[00:14:00]
create time and space for yourself.
This is where you can journal.
This is where you can meditate.
This is where you can pray.
This is where you can really spend time with yourself.
So that way you create time to think, to create, to battle plan.
And just like this.
Integrating business moments, whether you're on a sales call, a meeting, the more you incorporate your children, notice she's not crying.
She's not bothering me.
She's here.
She understands what dad's doing.
[00:14:30]
Do you know what dad's doing, baby?
Integration.
I challenge you to be aware that maybe the first time around, second time around, third time around, it's not going to be as easy.
Maybe they're not used to the new environment, but as time progresses, just like all things, they will learn, they will understand, they will understand how to carry themselves in these situations.
Just like right now, you see my daughter, she knows how to play next to
[00:15:00]
me.
She knows how to be present without interruption because over time she's learned how to integrate into what I do on a daily basis.
And if you can take all of these things as learning lessons and teach, that's the most important thing.
Because you teach them how to carry themselves.
You teach them how to think about scenarios and situations.
You teach them the proper etiquette and how to carry themselves.
Now all of these things start
[00:15:30]
becoming the legacy.
This is what you pass on to generations.
Now, at four years old, she's been on more closing calls.
She's been on more meetings.
She's worked with more clients.
She's done more podcasts.
She's done more videos.
She's done so much more at four years old than I did for almost three decades of my life, and it's a beautiful thing.
But at the same time, just like right after this, we have to have boundaries.
We have to
[00:16:00]
create digital boundaries where dad's not always on the computer.
Dad's not always on his phone.
You gotta be able to create space that you're not on social media.
You're not working.
You're not checking slack.
You're not doing the next text message, email, deal proposal, whatever the case might be.
Just like I said right before this, we just finished playing in the snow.
It's her first time seeing the snow.
You have to know when to cut work off.
You gotta know when to cut social
[00:16:30]
media off.
You gotta know, as long as you have a plan that you follow on a daily, weekly, and monthly basis, you can have it all.
You just gotta be willing to stretch yourself.
So if you're ready to stop killing yourself, trying to balance these things, if you're ready to stop killing your legacy with trying to do what mediocre people do, which is this lie of work-life balance.
Here's what I want you to do right now.
Number one,
[00:17:00]
if this has opened your eyes in any shape, way, or form, like and subscribe to this channel.
But number two, I want you to end this and go hang out with your kids, go hang out with your wife, go play in the snow, go, go, go to the beach, whatever season it is for you, for where you're at, unplug, spend time with your kids, spend time with your family, spend time with the people that matter the most.
And just see how much more energized you feel.
[00:17:30]
And just imagine a year from now, when they're a little bit older.
Imagine how much closer you're gonna be with them.
You ready to play in the snow again?
And imagine just having the life that you've always dreamed of, because you earned it.
You put in the work, and you led from the front.
As I said, if this has opened
[00:18:00]
your eyes, like this video, share this video with another brother that needs to hear this message.
Subscribe to the channel so that we can keep hearing more messages like this.
And again, as soon as this ends, put the phone down, put the laptop down, put the computer down.
Go spend time with your kids, go spend time with your wife, go love on your family.
I'll see you in the next one.
Say bye bye baby.
[00:18:30]
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just fucking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
-
Do you ever feel like you’re wearing “false armor,” pretending to be strong while quietly battling internal struggles? In this transformative episode, Phil Bohol unpacks the truth about vulnerability and its role in true strength. Using personal stories and raw honesty, he explores the dangers of denying unhappiness, bottling up emotions, and clinging to survival-mode habits that no longer serve us. Phil shares actionable steps for reflecting on the past year, releasing old baggage, and stepping into the courage required to lead your family, business, and life with authenticity.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
(00:00) Introduction and Purpose of the Show
(00:59) The Importance of Reflection
(01:36) The Burden of Pretending
(02:19) The Power of Vulnerability
(04:07) Facing Internal Struggles
(06:05) The Courage to Change
(07:59) Letting Go of the Past
(09:46) The Path to Self-Discovery
(16:25) Breaking Free from the Matrix
(20:36) Reflecting on the Year
(23:11) Final Thoughts and Challenges
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
[00:00:00]You know, I got a wife, I got kids, I got people looking up to me. I'm the provider, I create security, so how does somebody like me Stop pretending.
What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you
[00:00:30]
back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them. Everybody else in this world wants to bullshit you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
What's going on you guys. It has been a minute since we've done a little bit of a podcast episode.
So we're just going to catch up on some things, especially as we wrap up this year.
I really want you to
[00:01:00]
spend some time reflecting.
I don't think a lot of people reflect enough.
You get so caught up in your day to day, you get so caught up in the busyness of life.
If you don't reflect, you don't actually learn, you don't extract the teachings or the wisdoms that you need.
So that way you can elevate in every area of life.
The whole mentality of go, go, go only serves you to a certain extent.
And if you don't take time to reflect, then you're not going to know where the gaps are in your operating system, in your
[00:01:30]
mentality, in your spirituality, in your emotional control and emotional mastery.
And so when we think about why a lot of people operate in this life wearing what I call false armor, they pretend to be a very specific way.
Let's say that you have a family that you lead. It's very easy to get caught in this mentality of, well, I have to look strong.
You know, I got a wife, I got kids, I got people looking up to me.
[00:02:00]
Um, the provider, I create security. So how does somebody like me stop pretending?
I have to be strong for the family.
I have to be this.
I have to be that,
All you have to do is really be yourself.
That's the good, the bad, the ugly.
And men, if you're married, the best thing that you can do for your marriage, the best thing that you can do for your family is to stop trying to pretend to be Superman.
See, because when you
[00:02:30]
pretend to be Superman, that everything is good.
Whether business is actually doing good, but you're not good, or you're pretending you're happy right now, but you're not actually happy, whatever it is for you, you're hurting the people that could potentially step up to help you carry some of that weight.
So I was talking to somebody and they weren't telling their wife all of the hardship they're experiencing. And this happened for like two years
[00:03:00]
straight.
And the guy just felt like he was crumbling and crumbling and crumbling like everything was just going to shit.
I said,” have you told your wife any of this?”
He said, “no, you know, she's busy with the kids. She's trying to do her thing at work. And it's just it's not the right time to do it.”
I said, “man, it's been two years though.
You've been struggling with this internal battle by yourself for two years and you haven't even told your partner, your spouse, the person you're going
[00:03:30]
to do life with.”
How does that make any sense?
And he says, well, I'm trying to protect her.
I said, how is it protecting her though?
Because for you to carry this false armor, this burden, you don't think that energetically, your family doesn't feel that every day.
They don't see the look in your eyes when you're lost in your own thoughts, in your mind, even though you're supposed to be at the dinner table, or you're supposed to be hanging out with the kids, or you're supposed to be on a date
[00:04:00]
night with your wife.
You don't think that they, they don't feel any of that.
And they probably didn't.
They probably do.
I said, “look, man, the hardest thing that you can ever do is to be completely open, honest, and transparent with your wife about how crappy you actually feel.”
And I invite you to do that.
And he's like, “Oh man, I'm just, I'm breaking down.”
I'm crying. He's like crying. And, um, he's like, “I don't know. I
[00:04:30]
don't know what's going to happen.
I don't, I don't want her to feel like I couldn't do it.
That I, that I, that I'm breaking down right now.”
I said, “just see what happens, man.”
And so he goes and he has this conversation with his wife and he hits me back, you know, a couple of days later and he says, “bro, I don't know why it took so long for me to finally talk about what was going on with me.
But my wife said she's got my back. She's going to support me no matter what and that I got
[00:05:00]
this and the whole purpose of me telling you this story is to help you understand that a lot of the time.
Especially when you're the provider of a household when you lead a household or you know, you're the person that people go to.
It's sometimes difficult to feel like you can take off the armor for a little bit and be human.
That's the most powerful thing, the most courageous thing anybody can do.
So it takes a lot of courage to be weak.
[00:05:30]
The only time it's actually a weakness is when you start to judge yourself or become afraid of people's judgment of you.
But I want you to really ask yourself, is that the quality of life that you want to create and establish for yourself?
And is that the example you want to set for your kids that when you got all this shit going on internally, that bottling it up is the solution?
The powering through it, even though it feels like a void.
That's the solution.
Is that what you want to show your kids?
Cause whether you say it or not, they're going to follow in
[00:06:00]
the actions.
They're going to follow in how you carry yourself throughout life.
And so what I invite you to do is ask yourself where this past year, have you been pretending?
Where have you been pretending to be good?
When have you been pretending to be happy when you're not?
When have you been pretending that there's nothing going on?
See, I was really struggling with this for, for a large portion of my life.
You know, after my parents got
[00:06:30]
divorced at an early age, I was like, in denial for a majority of my life, all the way up until adulthood.
Literally until I met my wife.
And I kept lying to myself that this is what life is supposed to be like.
You go through hardship in your life and you just power through.
And you just do your best, but what you think is your best when you're at your weakest is not even close to your best.
And for a long time in my life, I held myself back from self actualization, from healing, from really being
[00:07:00]
able to absorb life for what it's supposed to be.
It wasn't until I was brutally honest with myself that number one, I was actually extremely unhappy, which is probably why at 16 years old, I was miserable and that I was actually making this void much bigger and bigger and bigger.
I was unhappy with myself.
I didn't love myself.
I didn't even know that was a thing.
And I made decisions that would make me more miserable
[00:07:30]
because I thought those temporary things, you know, getting drunk, getting high, doing the things, those little glimpses of happiness was happiness.
That's not the case.
And so the reason why I'm bringing this up is so that you become aware.
That a lot of the times when we start going to these things, these vices in our lives, it's because we think that that's temporary happiness that replaces true happiness.
True happiness comes from having the courage to say, I'm not good.
[00:08:00]
So wherever it is in your life, in your business, in your marriage, in your family, with yourself, take some time to reflect.
Ask yourself what parts of you that don't serve you anymore, what parts do you want to leave in this year?
Not bring it into the new one.
If you do this and you practice this.
What you're giving yourself the opportunity to do each and every year is to create.
More space for the new self to emerge, for the new self to be built.
[00:08:30]
A lot of people like to bring old baggage into each new year.
And then they wonder why each year they can't take the quantum leap.
Well, you can't quantum leap if you're holding on to baggage.
You can't quantum leap if you're holding on to the old self, because you have no space for the new self.
And I want you to really start asking yourself, you know, is this the quality of life you want to settle for?
Because that's what it is, you're settling.
And how many months?
How many years need to pass by for you to finally realize that
[00:09:00]
you haven't been happy? What do you need to lose? What, what, what major life event needs to happen for you to finally stop for a second and really stop looking outward for the solution and start to look inward, start to look within and start to ask yourself like, man, why am I so unhappy?
Anybody else that has what I have, a job, good business, a wife, kids,
[00:09:30]
they would be happy to have this because some people can't have it.
So why am I not happy?
And when we say comparison is the killer of all joy, that can also be dumbing down your unhappiness because you think that you should be more grateful.
Sure.
You could totally be more grateful, but that doesn't mean that.
The negativity that you feel and the unhappiness that you feel is not valid.
That's part of the problem.
You're not acknowledging the pain that you're experiencing
[00:10:00]
because you should be more grateful.
Again, it's not a one or the other type of situation.
It's a, it's a, it's a, it's a balance.
It's a harmony of things that yes, maybe I do need to be more grateful, but at the same time, I also need to acknowledge that I don't feel good that I probably need to be doing more stuff for myself.
Start filling up my own cup.
Because if you're like me, the reason why you tune in to these episodes is because you're cut from the same cloth.
[00:10:30]
Highly driven individual.
Will do anything and everything for their loved ones.
No matter how much it takes from them.
No matter if they got nothing left in the tank.
They're gonna give, give, give.
But I want you to become aware that the more that you give in that capacity, the less you're gonna be able to give in the grand scheme of things.
Yeah, sure.
It'll make you feel proud.
It'll stroke your ego that you can do this for a couple years.
But what happens when it's a couple years down the line, and you really got nothing?
[00:11:00]
You really think you're gonna give the best of you to your family?
You think you're gonna give the best of you to your marriage?
You think you're gonna give the best of you to your business?
To your career?
You think you're gonna give the best of you to you?
You think that you're gonna live the best possible life when you're running on fumes?
And I think this is where a lot of people get it twisted, right?
Because hustle culture, you have the fake alpha males out there talking about how you just got to keep running and gunning.
There's a time and a place for it, a hundred percent,
[00:11:30]
but it's not a hundred percent of the time because nobody runs and guns a hundred percent of the time.
That's, that's just a, uh, a false armor people wear.
So that way they look unstoppable on the internet.
But the truth is just like anybody, pro athletes, bodybuilders, anybody that's high performance, the amount of time you stay in a peak state, you must spend equal amount of time.
Resting, recovering, recharging, reflecting, so that way
[00:12:00]
you can give that same a hundred percent, but just like a battery, it depletes.
You can't give a hundred percent at 20%.
Can't give a hundred percent when you got 0%.
So I really want you to start thinking about this because especially after this past year, as I reflect into all these conversations I'm having with a lot of you, there's unhappiness there, but at the same time, while there's unhappiness, there's also like this denial.
Denying self.
Denying the unhappiness.
[00:12:30]
Denying the bad feelings.
Why?
Because of ego.
Pride.
I don't want to look like I don't got it.
I don't want to look like I'm weak.
The weakness comes from worrying too much about the opinions of others with how you're going to be perceived.
That's weakness.
Strength is I know myself and I know I'm not at a hundred percent.
And if I'm really going to lead this family, if I'm really going to lead this business, if I'm going to really lead myself and in this life, I have to know that
[00:13:00]
my cup needs to be full at all times.
And my cup being full is a selfless act because everything that overflows is what I give to the world, what I give to my family, what I give to my business.
And that overflows where I need to learn how to operate from.
I think it's because, you know, you might be like me, you might have had to live a large portion of your life, even up until this point in survival mode.
So all you know how to do is survive. All you know how to do is run away from the demons.
You don't know how to transition into
[00:13:30]
abundance.
You don't know how to transition into something more than running away.
Cause survival and running away is all you've known.
So when you get to a point, where you start to transcend from that, then it's like, well, how do I, how do I do this new thing?
If all I've known is the running away and the survival and, and that's how I've gotten myself to this point, just straight hustle and grind.
How do I then transition to this other thing where I actually have to spend more time on myself, make sure my cup is full.
[00:14:00]
And that's what's going to get me to where I want to, not where I need to get to just to survive. I don't understand, Phil. I don't understand the art form. Well, you're not supposed to.
Not yet, at least. You're supposed to give it enough time and that space for you to understand a new operating system.
But again, just like I mentioned, to reflect on that, to understand that, we'll teach you how to let go of things that no longer serve you.
An identity, an old way of thinking, an old way of being.
Leave that here. In this year, don't bring
[00:14:30]
it to the next one. Those are old ways of thinking. They might have gotten you to this, this point. Now don't lose the hustle, don't lose the drive, don't lose the driving force, don't lose the, the, the, the spark in yourself, the amber, the flame. Don't lose that. Don't let that go.
Don't get complacent. But start to ask yourself, if I continue thinking down this path, if I continue thinking about things in this manner, what is that preventing me from becoming?
[00:15:00]
Anything related to fear is preventing you from becoming who you need to be. A lot of people lack purpose, and that's why they don't know which direction they're going.
There's no intention behind their daily actions.
But you can't focus on the future if you're still looking backwards at the past. If you're still looking for that boogeyman.
If you're still looking for the darkness that's following you.
You can't grow in that space.
To go from dark to light,
[00:15:30]
you have to fully step into light, and that's a scary thing.
It's kind of like when you are on land, and you have dirt under your feet, you know exactly what's around you, for the most part.
You can see, you can feel.
But the moment you start going into these open waters, it's like going into the ocean.
You don't know what's beneath you, you don't know what's in front of you, to the left, to the right of you.
You don't even know, and what's being asked of you is to swim forward with faith.
[00:16:00]
The question is, can you trust yourself that you won't drown, that you're going to be good, that this path that you're on right now is purposed that you're supposed to be here.
You're supposed to be in the “not knowing”.
And that's where the wisdom comes from to really learn how to trust yourself in the space.
It's a very different way to experience life.
See, when we think about the matrix, the matrix, the programming
[00:16:30]
that most people in this world start with, and you'll either do it or you don't in your lifetime.
You break free from it, which is now understanding that the way the world works is the way of the sheep and that the herds go in that direction.
And in order to live a different life, you have to be courageous enough to go a different path.
And there's far less going down that path because it's the unknown.
It's, it's very secure and
[00:17:00]
safe to follow the sheep, to follow the herd, because you at least know that you're going to be surrounded by all of these people who are just following their programming.
And so it creates a sense of safety, but the reality is that's not safety.
You don't even know where the herd's going.
You're just following blindly, the blind leading the blind, but being controlled by other forces.
So at the point where you decide to go a different direction, to have the courage to go a new path,
[00:17:30]
that's when you really start to find yourself because now you're going to be forced to look within.
You're going to be forced to look inside of yourself and ask yourself, where are my flaws?
Where don't I believe in myself?
Where am I?
Where's this fear coming from?
Where am I scared? Where am I not good?
Where am I not happy?
And now you got to start facing some demons.
You gotta start winning some of those internal battles.
And again, it takes a very courageous individual to look inside and face those demons.
The sheep don't have to worry about that because the sheep just follow
[00:18:00]
the next person or the next sheep and they just follow and follow and follow.
And eventually they get to the end of their journey and that's it.
They're just following blindly.
You have to choose what type of life you want to have.
What type of life you want to experience because you got one shot.
Once I finally broke away from the programming, you know, and I did it at an early age, I realized like, I don't want a normal
[00:18:30]
life. If, if, if normal life is all that misery and darkness, and yeah, it might be easier just to submit to it and give up.
I don't want that.
If, if I got one shot and I decided not to, not to end everything at 16, what does the world have to offer me?
I'm going to go figure out what that is.
And I've spent every day since then, and it's been hard.
It's been difficult.
I spent every day since then.
Trying to figure out the purpose of my life,
[00:19:00]
and that's when you start to live life with purpose.
Because it's kind of like a question that's never answered.
But you're like Albert Einstein, you're just geeking out on it on a whiteboard.
You're trying to figure out the answer to this puzzle of life. So every day, every hardship you go through, you're like, it's insignificant in comparison to this big puzzle.
I'm trying to figure out, what is the purpose of my life?
What is my life's purpose?
If I have a century, if I have a hundred years, or eighty to a hundred
[00:19:30]
years to figure out this problem, is it worth it for me to invest my life to figure it out?
If you're not thinking at that level, again, this is when you start surrounding yourself with different ways of thinking so you can stretch the mind a little bit.
Stretch your vision of what your life could be.
And if it's not for you, then again, the herd is always there.
It's always available to you.
So why not spend some
[00:20:00]
time just taking a risk on yourself and going a different path?
The scary path.
The path you don't want to take.
The path of the unknown because you've never been there before.
Knowing that if it ever gets too scary, If you really don't feel what I'm telling you, you'll probably gonna feel by finding the courage to go that direction.
You can always turn around and follow the herd.
'cause the herd's always gonna be there.
You'll, you'll, you'll plug back in with them exactly where you left them.
[00:20:30]
Nowhere they didn't move, they're just there doing nothing.
As we end this year, want you to reflect back on the year, where were you the most happy?
Where were you the most unhappy?
Who did you love being around?
Love, not like.
Who'd you love being around?
Would you like being around?
Who did you despise being around?
Get rid of everybody you despised.
Make a decision on the people that you just liked and how much time you're
[00:21:00]
gonna give them in this new year.
Spend more time with the people that you love. If you do that, you'll be a much happier person by the end of 2025.
In 365 days, you're gonna be in a totally different space in your life.
If you have the courage. to walk a new path and to fully commit to the path.
It's one thing to take your first step. It's one thing to even think about going that direction.
It's another thing to follow the path, have
[00:21:30]
faith and surrender in that process.
Even when you experience some eyes and lows, some turbulence, cause you will, it's not a pretty path.
It's not an easy path for a reason.
It's designed to weed out the weak, but those who fully commit to the path.
Well, at some point reach a second wind and realize that that's life that they're breathing in all the fears, the doubts, all of the uncertainty is because you've never been there. And that's the whole beauty of life.
[00:22:00]
The more unknown it feels, just remember this means you've never been there, which means there's something to be excited about.
Don't always look at it from the point of darkness. Well, what's creeping in behind the corner over there, there's nothing.
That's just the mind of the past. So again, always ask yourself, am I looking forward or am I still looking back?
Am I still in the cage?
It's very easy to flip back and forth between them, but the more aware you are, the more intentional you can be about breaking free and staying free.
[00:22:30]
Some things to think about.
I'm going to be more active with doing these and sharing thoughts and guidance.
You know, whenever I get feedback in the comments, emails, or other social platforms.
These always seem to help the right people who need the message when the message is dropped.
So in 2025, I'm going to invest a lot more time sharing a lot of different things that have changed my way of thinking that have helped me.
[00:23:00]
When you understand the knowledge, download the knowledge, but more importantly, implement the knowledge, have the courage to take the next thing.
So my challenge to you as we end this year is to do something scary that's been calling to you, but you haven't taken that leap yet.
Take the leap.
If there's a version of you that you've been wanting to let go, I invite you to leave it in 2024.
Leave it.
[00:23:30]
It doesn't serve you anymore. Have the courage to do that.
And finally, if there's a conversation you should have with your spouse, with your family about pain.
So you can stop pretending because you want the real you to emerge.
You want to meet that version of you and your family, meet the real you, have that conversation.
I can guarantee you will feel more free simply by allowing yourself to drop the weight that you don't even have to carry.
It's never
[00:24:00]
been your responsibility to carry it.
So drop it.
You don't need it anymore.
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just fucking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
-
In this episode, Phil shares his experience of meeting and conversing with Walter O'Brien, one of the world's top IQ holders and the inspiration for the character in the TV show 'Scorpion'. Phil emphasizes the importance of asking high-level questions to extract valuable wisdom from individuals who are ahead in life or business. By analyzing the way Walter O'Brien thinks, Phil develops an understanding of algorithmic thinking, which he applies to his personal and professional life. Phil encourages listeners to avoid superficial questions and focus on understanding the thought processes of successful individuals to better solve problems and achieve their goals.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(00:00) Introduction to the Phil Bohol Show
(00:43) Meeting a Genius: Walter O'Brien
(02:14) Observations and Analysis
(05:45) The Importance of Asking High-Level Questions(13:34) Understanding the Genius Algorithm
(18:07) Applying the Algorithm to Life and Business
(24:54) Conclusion and Final Thoughts
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
Transcription:
[00:00:08]
- - - - -
[00:00:00]If you only had one chance to talk to a fucking genius, please don't waste your time and their time.
[00:00:10]
What's going on, you guys?
It's Phil Bohol, and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have
[00:00:20]
real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
[00:00:30]
Everybody else in this world wants to bullshit you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:00:40]
Alright, what's going on everybody?
So, we're gonna be talking about my experience, having the opportunity to talk with an actual genius.
[00:00:50]
Um…
4th highest IQ recorded in the world - actual genius, which is awesome.
Before we jump into that though,
[00:01:00]
Do me a favor, like it, heart it, that helps me help more people.
So let's dive into it.
So, I had the opportunity to talk to an actual
[00:01:10]
genius and I'm going to be sharing with you today my biggest takeaway is what I was thinking about, what I noticed when I was
[00:01:20]
surrounded by others, the quality of the questions being asked to an actual genius, and where my headspace kind of went to where I felt I could
[00:01:30]
extract the most, not only for personal answers, but also for business.
And I want you guys to understand when you're talking to somebody
[00:01:40]
that's high level, it's very important that you take the time to think about and consider the questions that you're asking.
What I mean by that is
[00:01:50]
if there's somebody in your life, whether they're a genius or somebody that's just higher level than you, that you can extract wisdom from,
[00:02:00]
please do yourself a favor and do that person a favor, because I'm sure they talk to a lot of normal people,
[00:02:10]
and what stimulates their mind is a higher level conversation.
So, here's what I noticed.
I went to one of my Mentor's events.
[00:02:20]
And, um, he had a guest Walter O'Brien.
Walter was actually the,
[00:02:30]
main character in this show, that apparently you can watch on Paramount, called Scorpion.
It's an awesome show.
I started watching it after meeting him, obviously, because I wanted to
[00:02:40]
get a better understanding of his mentality.
And, um, we had an opportunity to have a chat with him backstage.
[00:02:50]
And the first thing that I did, I didn't immediately approach him, I wanted to analyze a genius.
What, what's the difference between a genius and some random dude that immigrated here from the
[00:03:00]
Philippines that apparently doesn't have that high of an IQ, according to a Google test.
Um, my wife's a lot smarter than me.
Shout out to my wife.
[00:03:10]
And I wanted to analyze what makes this guy a genius.
And before this, I already watched him on stage, how he spoke.
[00:03:20]
He'd already explained a little bit more about himself.
But I wanted to see like the, the, the man behind the speaker on stage.
And so I just analyzed.
[00:03:30]
Okay, so he was like sitting like a table next to me or yeah, a table next to me.
I was here and I was just analyzing and what I like to do whenever I'm like in a
[00:03:40]
public setting, I like to analyze, I like to understand my environment.
I don't know if this was a Marine Corps and me kind of being hyper aware of my surroundings or if
[00:03:50]
I'm just that way, I'm just going to assume I'm a little bit of both.
And so I'm noticing that he's looking away.
He's looking like,
[00:04:00]
there's people asking him questions over here to his right.
And, he would be looking away.
And what that normally tells me is somebody is not interested.
[00:04:10]
Somebody is disinterested, maybe disengaged.
And I'm like, Hmm, I wonder what they're talking about to make this genius, not look at them in the eyes and be engaging.
[00:04:20]
Is he bored?
Is this just how he is?
Is this what geniuses are like?
I don't know.
So I was watching, I was watching.
[00:04:30]
And I was talking to my team, and we were kind of debriefing on some of the things.
Damn, I wish I brought my, um, or maybe I did.
Hold on.
[00:04:40]
Check this out.
I took notes when the genius was talking, okay?
Shit.
Oh, it's over there.
[00:04:50]
Hold on.
Check this out.
This, bam!
This is what I gathered from a genius, okay?
[00:05:00]This is also what I gathered from a genius.
And this is an algorithm.
Now, this is my algorithm, and I'll explain what that means in a bit.
[00:05:10]
But I was showing my team what I was able to extract from watching a genius teach a room of business owners and entrepreneurs.
[00:05:20]
And I was actually dissecting his mind.
And I was asking my team, I said, so when you guys were listening to this genius talk, what did you get from it?
[00:05:30]
And I was expecting for them to have a very similar drawing as I did.
And we found that we all took away so many different things,
[00:05:40]
but only I was the one that took away a new algorithm, a new way of thinking.
And that's when I realized the question that I need to ask this guy,
[00:05:50]
when I walk up to him, has to be really, really, really good.
If I was able to extract an algorithm on how to think about life, situations, scenarios, I need to
[00:06:00]
put a good amount of energy and effort into whatever question I'm going to ask this guy, because God knows when I'm ever going to be able to talk to the dude again, right?
[00:06:10]
I kept looking back and I'm like, why do people, why does he seem like he's looking away?
I'm like, why is he not engaged?
And I'm like, damn, maybe, maybe he's having a bad day.
Do geniuses have a bad day?
[00:06:20]
Um, maybe it's not the right time.
Maybe he's just getting bombarded with people asking him questions and shit, because he's a fucking genius.
Maybe, I don't know.
Maybe, is this the right time?
Should I do it?
Fuck it.
Let's do it.
[00:06:30]
And I was like, I'm gonna walk up.
So I walk up, hands behind my back, sign of respect, right?
And, um, just waiting my turn.
It's like, okay, they're having a conversation.
[00:06:40]
Be respectful.
And then I understood why he was looking at me.
And this is what I really want you guys to take away.
If you don't even take away the shit that I took away and you take away this next bit that I'm about to say, please take it.
[00:06:50]
It will help you a lot.
Exponentially change your life.
The questions that this dude was being asked was, Hey, did you, do you watch Netflix?
[00:07:10]
Do you watch Netflix...
What?
You, if you only had one chance to talk to a fucking genius, that you're probably never going to talk to again, the one question you ask is if the dude watches a show on Netflix.
[00:07:30]
Please guys, don't waste your time and their time.
Don't waste people that have done something awesome in their life, and ask them if they watched a fucking Netflix show.
Please God, don't do that.
[00:07:50]
Dumbest - literal dumbest thing, no wonder the guy was like looking away.
It's like this dude.
After I watched Scorpion, his show, I understood the
[00:08:00]
extent of the shit that he's done and solved and the problems he solved.
The dude has solved terrorism problems.
Dude has hacked into
[00:08:10]
NASA when he was like 13 or 14 years old or some shit like that.
Maybe 11, maybe 12, who knows.
Um, the dude has, I think,
[00:08:20]
has accounted for for trillions of dollars worth of solutions.
Do you really think that somebody at that caliber is stimulated by a discussion
[00:08:30]
about Netflix?
Hmm.
And I was like, ah, I understand.
Because, me too.
I'm not even a genius.
And if somebody wants to
[00:08:40]
waste time talking about Netflix, I am not your guy.
If you want to have a low level conversation, not your guy.
And I'm not even a genius.
I just respect my time enough to talk about higher level shit.
[00:08:50]
Like, what are we doing here?
So then I decided to politely interrupt.
Hey sir, got some questions for you.
Um, would love to pick your brain.
And me being like
[00:09:00]
a little kid, in a candy shop, with a genius, I like, Hey, here's my drawing.
Here's my other drawing.
[00:09:10]
Can I ask you a question?
Um, the way that your mind works with a 197 IQ, does your brain have an algorithm
[00:09:20]
and can you teach it to me in a way that a non-genius can understand the algorithm?
So why did I ask this question
[00:09:30]
you guys?
Why did I ask this question?
Why did I ask this particular question?
Does your brain have an algorithm?
[00:09:40]
And can you explain how the algorithm works to somebody that's not a genius to understand it?
[00:09:50]
Why did I ask that question?
Think about it.
[00:10:00]
I could ask a very singular type of Question.
Hey, can you solve this singular problem for me?
[00:10:10]
Question related to how he thinks and talks.
Good, yeah, 100%.
I don't know so much about the talking part, but the thinking part.
[00:10:20]
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Something he can process.
Absolutely.
But I wanted to understand his process because there's, there's, there's something that people don't
[00:10:30]
understand about, I mean, not even just coaching, but extracting information from people.
The goal of extracting information, and this is related to
[00:10:40]
business.
This is related to sales.
This is how you guys asked me, well, Phil, how are you closing deals?
How do you close?
5,000, 20,000, 50,000, a 100,000 multiple six figure deals.
How do you do all of that?
How do
[00:10:50]
you run these businesses?
Bah, bah, bah, bah, bah.
People usually ask a tactical based question.
And what that means is how do I do this thing?
How do I solve this singular problem?
[00:11:00]
The reason why that's ineffective, and the reason why I did not ask that question in this scenario, and I never will when talking to a high level person is because if
[00:11:10]
you give me the answer to that one singular thing, I'm going to have other questions because I solved that problem, and now I need to solve another problem.
But now I don't have an
[00:11:20]
opportunity to talk to you.
So instead, when I'm talking to somebody higher level, I don't ask how to do something, I ask them, how would
[00:11:30]
you think about something?
The more I understand how you think and how you process information, And I can figure out your brain's algorithm,
[00:11:40]
then if I think like you, then I will solve problems like you, maybe not as efficiently as you, but whether I have one singular problem or a multitude of problems
[00:11:50]
in front of me, I take all those problems through this algorithm, and I would probably come up with a similar solution to all of them versus just, Hey, how do you
[00:12:00]
solve this one thing?
Does that make sense to you guys?
Got to think bigger.
Instead of trying to get external surface level answers, go to the root.
[00:12:10]
Because if you understand the root, then you can understand how it grows.
And so I asked your brain, does it, does it work
[00:12:20]
like an algorithm?
What's the algorithm?
Can you explain that to me?
Dumb it down is what I was saying.
And he smiled.
And he didn't smile the entire time
[00:12:30]
that I was waiting to talk to the guy.
He looked away, disinterested.
You can tell.
And, um, it's interesting because even though he smiled, it was a
[00:12:40]
manufactured smile.
So what he said during his presentation was that he doesn't actually feel human emotions the way that other people do.
And he has to logically
[00:12:50]
create a scenario in his mind where he can script out like an actor, when to show this emotion, because his IQ is so high, he can't be human with people.
[00:13:00]
So it comes off very awkward.
So the fact that he smiled in this moment means he's already calculated this response and this engagement and blah, blah, blah, which was crazy to me.
So he smiled
[00:13:10]
and he looked down at my drawing and he looked back at me.
And I said, does your mind kind of
[00:13:20]
work like this drawing.
And I was like, can you explain that to me?
And I was so interested, hands behind my back, sign of respect, leaning in.
I'm very interested.
Please tell me how your genius mind
[00:13:30]
works, because this is going to be game changing for everything.
Then he says, yes, my mind works in algorithms
[00:13:40]
and the way that my mind works as an algorithm is a lot of people, when they try to solve problems is they try to
[00:13:50]
solve the very next problem.
Which then leads them to have to solve the next problem and then leads them to have to solve the next problem.
[00:14:00]
And now it can be days, weeks, months, years later, until they go through that entire process.
He said a genius's mind doesn't work that way.
[00:14:10]
A genius's mind works where you basically can see every leaf on a tree.
You can imagine tree stump.
[00:14:20]
Branches, leaves.
Imagine being able to see the whole thing unfold in your mind.
And I'm like, that makes sense.
[00:14:30]
Because a genius is able to see all various scenarios, but their mind is like such a supercomputer that it can calculate what those scenarios could be.
[00:14:40]
And he said something very interesting to me.
He says, All of those available options, when we're making a decision,
[00:14:50]
a genius can see all of those decisions happen in front of them all at once.
And they just choose the
[00:15:00]
one decision out of all those thousands of different scenarios on which one would be the best, which one would be the most productive.
[00:15:10]
And in my hand, I'm thinking, okay, okay, trying to track what you're saying.
So in my brain, so this is all happening in real time
[00:15:20]
to you super quick.
Cause I'm trying to be respectful of his time while still really trying to understand it in a way that I can interpret it because I'm not a genius.
Okay.
Um, I'm like, okay,
[00:15:30]
so trees, branches, leaves…
But you're able to see all of them, where most people can only see one.
Interesting.
[00:15:40]
And this is what I do next, you guys.
So again, this is part two to the thing that if you, there's anything you can take from this is ask high level questions.
But the part two to that is
[00:15:50] download it, download it where it's, I have this new information from this person.
This is the current thought process that I have.
[00:16:00]
And then compare notes.
What I did in that moment, was then I said, in my own brain, and I'm trying to process this as quick as possible…
[00:16:10]
How's that different than how I think?
And the craziest part for me was realizing, I think in the same direction he does,
[00:16:20]
but not at the capacity he's able to.
Because again, I'm not a genius.
But, what this showed me was
[00:16:30]
the infantry, as an infantry squad leader, has allowed me to at least crack a semi code to how geniuses think.
[00:16:40]
Which is in sequences.
So as you guys, if you guys have been following me for years, I talk about sequences, I talk about levers.
I say it in a, in a way that
[00:16:50]
a genius wouldn't say because it's dumbed down at my level.
But then it showed me, I'm like, okay, so basically I'm on the right path,
[00:17:00]
but I just need to stretch my brain, my neural pathways more in the exact directions they're already growing to.
[00:17:10]
Which allowed me to build an algorithm based on what he was saying.
And I was pretty damn on target before I ever fucking meeting the guy.
[00:17:20]
And this, what this did was it re-instilled the confidence I had in my processing system.
How I think about things, how I solve problems, how I solve business problems,
[00:17:30]
sales problems, life problems.
And do you see now how that question, understanding how this man thinks
[00:17:40]
has now served me and will serve me for the rest of my life?
Versus what, Do you watch this Netflix show?
Do you watch Netflix?
[00:17:50]
I mean, you know, right?
So then I'm like, interesting, interesting…
And now that I understand,
[00:18:00]
not maybe at all, even close to the depth that his brain can go, I'm
Especially if you watch Scorpion, you'll know what I'm talking about.
Um, what it did is it
[00:18:10]
gave me clarity because for me, I think I've been in the personal development space for so long that, and this might be true for you guys, especially once you guys start
[00:18:20]
investing into yourselves, you might feel a little crazy, right?
Because like who you surround yourself with are people that are not as invested into personal development, personal growth, their business, all that stuff.
[00:18:30]
They don't invest into coaching courses, blah, blah, blah, like we do.
And sometimes we can feel crazy.
Because as entrepreneurs, as business owners, we have like thousands
[00:18:40]
of ideas and sometimes we can think we're going psycho.
But when you talk to somebody like this, who thinks basically the way that we do, but at
[00:18:50]
like scale, what it does is it normalizes this, this like feeling of, oh, am I, am I weird?
Am I different?
Am I blah blah blah blah blah?
[00:19:00]
And man, like I can't tell you guys the sense of relief that I felt.
Like my team can tell you too, I probably had a big ass smile on my face after we debriefed, um, after the fact
[00:19:10]
I had a big ass smile on my face because then I was like, damn, I'm not doing anything wrong.
I'm actually going the exact direction I need to be going.
[00:19:20]
And because I figured out the algorithm in which to process information, I also learned the algorithm in which to understand and process business.
[00:19:30]
And so I've been leveraging this entire new way of looking at life, business, and decisions.
[00:19:40]
Now using an algorithm versus how I feel, using the best educated guess, I can go even deeper into this topic
[00:19:50]
because of the unlocks that happened during this conversation.
And that was only half of the conversation, by the way, but I'm running up on time because I have to go.
[00:20:00]
But here's what I want you guys to leave this with okay, leave today with.
[00:20:10]
It's very important that you understand that the success that you seek in life is not about how much you know, but more so how you think
[00:20:20]
about everything that you know a lot or a little.
If you can understand the sequences, the
[00:20:30]
algorithm behind a decision making process, in your personal life, in business, it's all the same.
And you can find a
[00:20:40]
sequential system that you have personally created.
Cause you all have it, just like I have my system, you have your system.
If you can spend a day
[00:20:50]
literally figuring out your personal algorithm in which you make decisions on, all the
[00:21:00]
problems that you have.
Like for me, now all I have to do is plug in my problem in the center of this algorithm.
And then I start
[00:21:10]
mapping everything else out and then I solve the problem.
And then I also solve the next problems and the next problems after that.
Right?
Remember, like I told you, like the tree with the branches and the leaves.
[00:21:20]
And it's a beautiful thing because then you realize that you already have all the answers that you seek.
You just have to spend time with yourself to figure it out.
[00:21:30]
And it's not more external information, right?
This is why, especially in our industry, guys, the information industry, people can go through course
[00:21:40]
after course, after course.
Get information, after information, after information, but they don't know how that information applies to them.
They don't know how to make it apply for them.
They don't know how to utilize that
[00:21:50]
information based on their sequence, based on their algorithm.
And that's why they're never able to yield results.
And this one singular conversation was
[00:22:00]
validation for me, that the reason why I was able to go from where I was, especially if you guys have been with me since 2020, to go from where I was in 2020 to where I'm at today.
[00:22:10]
It was all a sequence.
It was all an algorithm.
And that algorithm was not business
[00:22:20]
knowledge, sales knowledge, and I've said it for years and I'll say it always.
There are so many people that are so much smarter than me that have so much more information than me,
[00:22:30]
but they haven't learned how to utilize this information to get towards their end goal and state.
And that's why you guys have seen a year over year over year quantum leap into the next level.
[00:22:40]
And so what I want you guys to leave this with, cause I only got a minute left, is when you guys have the opportunity to talk to people that are at a far different level than you are in life or
[00:22:50]
in business, don't waste time asking them about the singular problem.
Pick their brain and understand how they think.
[00:23:00]
The more you understand how they think about things, life, business, in general, their regular algorithm, the more you're going to be able to now
[00:23:10] extract how to think about things from their perspective.
Thus, having the ability to solve all problems, not just one, and that's how you maximize on the value
[00:23:20]
you're able to extract from somebody, okay?
I geek out on this shit.
I think that, um, it was probably,
[00:23:30]
I'll just say this year, cause I have to think and I don't have enough time to think right now.
Um, the most I don't
[00:23:40]
even know the word… substantial conversation?
It was the most… it was the best fucking conversation.
I'm not a genius, I'm not gonna try to talk like one.
[00:23:50]
Best fucking conversation I've had, I haven't been lit up like that in so long.
Because of like, how awesome it is to break down the signs of how somebody thinks.
[00:24:00]
That thinks at that level.
You know, I've met a lot of people and they built 10 million companies, 50 million, 100 million companies plus, and I love extracting the
[00:24:10]
room, but to do that with a genius, that was a blessing for me.
So, um, I may continue on part two to this, because again, that was only half the conversation and definitely not
[00:24:20]
my, all of my takeaways.
But I didn't realize I was going to talk so much about just one piece, but you can see what happens when they're able to extract so much in so little time.
[00:24:30]
And this entire conversation was probably 15, 20 minutes max.
But the extraction of the lessons and the teachings was so profound
[00:24:40]
that I still haven't stopped thinking about that conversation.
And I literally, um, built out a whole business plan and business model leveraging the algorithm.
[00:24:50]
And it was so much easier than it ever has been in the past.
Okay guys, so I really do have to go, um, but I hope that you were able to get some type of value from that reflection.
I may do a part two, there may be a part three, depends on how long I ramble for.
Um, but if you ever have an opportunity to meet Walter O'Brien, or if you ever get
[00:25:10]
an opportunity to watch his show, Scorpion - 10 out of 10 would recommend.
20 out of 10 would recommend.
I mean, you'll even learn from the show based on how he thinks and solves problems.
[00:25:20]
It's a beautiful thing to see.
And, it was, it was a great experience for me, to be able to meet the guy in person and to really pick his brain the right way.
[00:25:30]
So with that being said, guys, much love as always.
Peace.
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just
[00:25:40]
fucking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
-
Is your current mindset holding you back from true success? Phil Bohol and Leah Kapral dive deep into the mindset shifts that transform your life and business to uncover the secrets to personal and professional growth. Elevate your potential by prioritizing self-care, envisioning a bigger future, and embracing the journey towards abundance. Ignite your passion and drive towards creating the life you've always dreamed of!
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(00:00) - Introduction
(05:55) - Define Your Dream Life to Achieve Success
(09:22) - Balanced Growth and Time Freedom
(12:51) - Clear Structure and Direction for Daily Activities
(17:49) - Allocate Money with Clear Purpose
(21:41) - Importance of Lifestyle and Financial Planning
(24:15) - Envision and Feel the Achievement
(28:07) - Striving for More or Settling for Mediocrity
(28:50) - Overcoming Fear and Aim for Success
(33:55) - Seek Knowledge, Embrace Flaws, Find Purpose
(36:05) - Integrate Personal and Business Structures
(39:54) - Avoid Wasting Time on Unproductive Ideas - REST
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
Transcription:
[00:00:08] Phil BoholWhat's going on, you guys?
It's Phil Bohol.
And welcome to the Phil Bohol show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life and more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullshit you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
Leah, do everybody a favor.
Just introduce yourself.
Who you are, where you're from, what your offer is, and what it is that you want to leave this coaching call with today to help you break through whatever ceiling you're hitting inside of your business.
[00:00:48] Leah K
Thanks, Phil.
So my name's Leah Kapral.
I'm in Australia, near Byron Bay, beautiful place, and I am a blood sugar coach.
And my offer is I help business owners or corporate employees who are over 40 that are ready to take responsibility, and they want to lose weight, reduce health risks such as diabetes, heart disease, and fatty liver, and feel good again.
That’s me!
[00:01:23] Phil Bohol
Love that… So let's dive in with what are you struggling with right now?
What's the biggest thing that we need to unlock during our next 45 minutes together to take your business to the next level?
[00:01:38] Leah K
Yes.
So I would say what I'm struggling with is that in the past, I've played not to lose rather than play to win.
So, yeah.
Commitment to myself.
And when I do that, I'll be able to service.
Yeah, service people in my business.
[00:02:07] Phil Bohol
So do you feel like you're basically transitioning from that survival mode into, like, abundance, and you're having trouble connecting the two?
[00:02:16] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:02:16] Phil Bohol
Bridging it, basically.
Okay.
How do you think it's holding you back right now?
Like, in what ways?
If you can identify that.
[00:02:26] Leah K
I'd say just a bit of scarcity, skilled (with the tech).
So that overwhelm thinking too far into the future, structure, and I'm sure there's some I'm not good enough or impostor syndrome going on, for sure.
[00:03:02] Phil Bohol
Okay, so why was it easier to be in survival mode versus the mode that you're in right now?
[00:03:09] Leah K
Um… why was it easier?
Um, it was easier because I was an employee, and the people I was surrounded with, they were all in survival.
Now, I've got some assets, so I've got a bit of space to design this.
So I'm not… I'm not in survival, but it's not really, it's not accelerating at the rate I would like it to.
So, yeah, I'd say environment, it's the only way I knew culturally.
[00:03:55] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:03:57] Phil Bohol
So now that you've got some assets.
Are you, like, just not moving at the speed in which you want?
Are you getting in your way?
What is that?
Because what I'm doing right now is I'm analyzing kind of, like, your thought process, where you're taking yourself mentally, and I'm trying to pinpoint where you're getting in your way.
So what's going on?
Now that you're in a, a better place, you don't have to survive.
You know, all of that good stuff.
You're at this stage, think about, like, your day, think about your business.
Think about this impact.
Right.
[00:04:31] Phil Bohol
You want to impact the lives of 10,000 people, 100,000 people, right.
Um, to become that, and I think I was talking to this, uh, with somebody else to survive, is “I just need to figure out how to put food on the table”.
“I just need to figure out how I'm going to pay my mortgage next month or my rent next month or my bills next month or my car note next month”.
But when we transition from that survival place to now, we have to look forward to something.
And it's kind of like being in open water.
Sometimes we don't know how to operate in that place because we're so used to looking behind us, to run away from the very thing that we're afraid of.
But now we have to look forward to something, and sometimes it's a very hard thing to look forward to something.
[00:05:09] Phil Bohol
So in what ways are you getting in your own way right now?
[00:05:17]
Yeah, I'd say clarity of the future.
[00:05:21] Phil Bohol
Okay. Hmm.
[00:05:25] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:05:27] Phil Bohol
Clarity of the future.
So that's… clarity of the future.
Okay.
So a lot of the times when we're thinking about moving towards something, right.
I literally, I think I just got off a call with somebody today about this, and we're talking about envisioning what it is that we're running towards, right.
Because if we're not clear on our target, it's kind of like sighting in on a sniper rifle or a machine gun, but we don't really know what we're aiming at.
And if we don't know, then we can't pull the trigger.
[00:05:58] Phil Bohol
We can't do the “thing”.
We can't build the business.
We can't grow our impact.
We can't really operate day to day with any type of structure or discipline because we don't know why we're doing it.
And a lot of the time, I think people, they… they forget that the simple things really do scale them.
The simple things are really the things that we have to focus on to be able to get to the next level.
So have you spent any time really asking yourself and putting like, literal pen to paper what it is that you're going towards?
Like, when I say that, I mean, what is this dream life?
What is the house?
What is the quality of life?
How do you want to be spending your time?
What time do you want to wake up every single day?
When you wake up every single day and you open your eyes, what do you want to see?
When you think about having nights, how do you want to spend your nights?
How do you want to spend your weekends?
What is that quality of life?
Have you spent any time getting so clear as if you can literally feel like you're there already?
Have you spent any time there?
[00:07:03] Leah K
It's a really interesting question because, like, it's a year since I left my relationship.
And during that, like, as soon as, within weeks of grieving that I set up a vision board and everything… no, I'd say no.
90, 80% has, has been created.
The dream of supporting others, like making a big impact and also not being location, not needing to be located somewhere to work.
So that freedom, sense of freedom hasn't been created.
[00:08:02] Phil Bohol
Has to be, right?
And you have to keep in mind, vision board, or getting clear on it doesn't mean, like, that's it forever.
Like, you can literally create this today and in seven days and 30 days, the shit will change again because you as a human, you're changing over time.
Every single day you have new inputs, which means you're going to have a new output and you have to be able to remember that it's just a starting point, right?
Let's say, for example, you set a GPS, you're going from California to New York and you take the wrong turn.
If you had your original vision board, you would never be able to get there because you didn't think that you were going to take this wrong turn.
And now you're on a different path.
But what does the GPS do?
It recalculates.
And so the same thing has to happen with your vision of the future.
[00:08:47] Phil Bohol
You know, there's going to be some things that you thought you wanted.
Um, like, for me, for example, I remember a vision board that I did back in like 2019.
And I was like, man, what is this life?
What is this dream life that I want to create for myself?
And I remember distinctly, I put this, like, BMW, it's like black BMW.
And like, that was like the extent, you know.
Now I'm driving around in the car that I drive now, but the car that I drive now was never in my vision board, but over time it changed.
But I needed to have a starting point.
And I also had to give myself permission that every 30 days, every week, shit, every day.
If I needed to change it, if I wanted to change it, if I wanted something different, that it was okay to want that.
Because as I continued to execute in my life, executed my business, my vision, my potential continued to grow.
[00:09:35] Phil Bohol
But there's a difference between having time and location freedom and saying, I want to live in a million dollar home and I want to be able to spend at least 3 hours a day doing this thing.
So for me, it's spending time with my kids, spending time with my family.
I want to be able to spend one to 3 hours going to the gym, working on myself in my personal development.
I want to spend time with clients, with clients I actually enjoy talking to.
I don't want to have fucking nightmare clients where I hate seeing them or thinking about that.
I have to see them today.
It's important to be that clear.
Because when you say I want to have time and location freedom, so, you know, I can do anything from anywhere, that's still so broad.
And what I want you to do, to be able to have a little pep in your step, right.
[00:10:20] Phil Bohol
To be able to be like, I'm going to fucking crush today because you know where you're running to.
So let's mind map it a little bit.
What the hell is time and location freedom?
Like, are you, ist it…is it beachside?
Is it in Spain?
Is it in California?
Where is that?
Where's your, where's your, where's your headquarters at?
[00:10:39] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:10:40] Phil Bohol
And, like, where would you want to spend that?
Freedom?
[00:10:43] Leah K
Yeah, Spain.
Spain and Portugal.
Yeah, love it.
[00:10:50] Phil Bohol
So Spain and Portugal.
So now, I mean, I'm either like, really that good or you're just choosing Spain or Portugal.
Why Spain and Portugal?
What does it mean to you to be able to go there and have that as your headquarters?
[00:11:04] Leah K
Um, I just love the ocean.
Like, the depth of the ocean there, the colors.
Yeah.
There's so much vibrance in culture and celebrating life, food and.
Yeah.
The mountain next to the ocean, like, the topography.
Yeah, it just feels, um.
It feels like you're in the postcard or in that, in the picture on the wall.
[00:11:40] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:11:40] Phil Bohol
Yeah. So now your homework is the city and the home or the view.
You got to get a visual.
Like, literally go on google after this call and look up places in Spain.
Look up the actual location.
Look at the actual cliff that overlooks the ocean.
Like, you have to be that clear.
And then you gotta start from, from that point, that vision point.
[00:12:02] Phil Bohol
Then you have to start envisioning your day as if you're already living it.
So what would that day look like for you?
Where like, you're so full of energy that you can, you can impact the world by, by impacting yourself.
So what does that daily schedule look like?
[00:12:20] Leah K
Yeah, I do like, I do like working.
It's not like I want not to be with people.
If I could work 3 hours a day, yeah, 3 hours a day, 4 times a week, I would be happy.
[00:12:56] Phil Bohol
Okay, so what time are those 3 hours?
Is it 1 hour in the morning, one in the afternoon, one in the evening?
Is it 3 hours straight?
Is it from 08:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m.?
Is it from twelve to three?
Is it from three to six?
Like, we're talking about absolute clarity.
And for those of you guys listening, you guys might think this is stupid.
But to have such a, a clarity on which direction, what the dream life is that you're trying to create when you wake up every single day knowing that that's what you're working towards, that's what makes you excited.
Because now you know that you're, you're literally in the process of building your dream life.
When you're not as clear that the way that we're going through this exercise right now, you wake up today and you're just like, man, maybe I should just like, wait till tomorrow.
Or like, you know, I guess I can kind of do some things, but I don't really have that, that urgency to do it because we're just not clear.
And so this, like, I mean, I'm being so anal with the details because it's so important.
Okay, so like, leah, 3 hours.
How are you structuring those 3 hours?
What time is that?
[00:14:00] Leah K
Ten to twelve and two to 03:00 p.m.
[00:14:08] Phil Bohol
Okay, and how much money do you want to be making in your business to sustain that life?
[00:14:17] Leah K
So my salary, my highest salary was 120k.
So the first goal would be to replace that, and then the second goal would be to double that, 250k.
[00:14:36] Phil Bohol
So what happens is we're building your dream life.
Your dream life is the end destination.
It's not a, let's, let's try to get to this point and then let's try to get to this point.
Because let's say, for example, if you're like, my goal is to make $120,000 a year, but I run my own schedule, I do my own business.
I coach and consult for a living.
Ba ba ba ba ba.
If you fall short of that by 50%, you're at 60,000 per year.
You're not going to feel happy about that.
But if your goal is probably what you're going to say next, which is your real goal, you fall 50% short of that, you're still crushing your I just want to replace my income goal.
[00:15:15] Phil Bohol
Does that make sense?
Like, go big.
A lot of people are trained on, well, have fucking realistic goals.
And I get it, you know, set proper expectations that if you've never made a million dollars in a year, you're probably not going to do that in a month.
But at the same time, that doesn't mean you shouldn't strive for that.
That doesn't mean that you shouldn't optimize to that.
Because when you're thinking about $120,000 versus, like, what's your actual goal?
What's the thing that's like, oh, shit, that's actually, fucking, that's a lot of money I'm gonna have to work towards.
What's that number?
[00:15:44] Leah K
Yeah, a million dollars in a year.
[00:15:47] Phil Bohol
Okay.
Million per year versus $120,000, which is basically ten x.
You're gonna have to make very different decisions to get to a million dollars per year and just getting to $100,000 per year.
[00:16:00] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:16:00] Phil Bohol
You're gonna have to think bigger.
You're gonna have to let go of some things that don't serve you, including wasting time, let's say, for example.
So let's do this.
When, when people tell me they want to make like a million dollar business and they're like, “damn, you know, it'd be nice to, you know, start off with 100,000, then get to 250, then 500, then a million”.
But their goal is a million, right?
If they optimize to $100,000 per year, what's going to happen in their day to day?
They're going to feel stressed out.
They're going to be emotionally charged.
They're going to feel like they're never going to be able to get there.
[00:16:33] Phil Bohol
That it's so fucking hard because the payoff is not enough for them.
It's not enough to say, I'm willing to sacrifice all of this comfort to get to that because they've already experienced it.
Does that make sense?
And believe it or not, $100,000 is really not that far away from where you're already at.
So you're kind of already there.
But to say a million dollars now it's like well fuck, I'm way behind.
Every day it feels like you'll be behind.
It's like well if I'm really trying to get to a million, I don't have to worry about this fucking video looking perfect.
I just have to get the video done because I got to build something else.
[00:17:07] Phil Bohol
And even this thing doesn't have to be perfect or like the iOS, the latest iOS update.
I just need iPhone version 1.
I just need to get the shit done.
And you start moving with a purpose, moving with an urgency because you have so much shit to do.
I think they actually made a book about this.
It's called like 10X is easier than 2X or 1X or whatever the fuck it is, right?
To do more work towards a bigger payout is almost the same amount of effort that you're going to have to put into making $100,000, but at least the payout is bigger, is better.
So always optimize to that.
So why'd you choose a million bucks?
Why not 1.2, why not 750?
Why million?
[00:17:50] Leah K
Probably just came from my head.
[00:17:54] Phil Bohol
So now this is where other people go wrong with money-mindset.
But you gotta make the money make sense for you, you got to make the money mean something to you.
If you can't allocate the dollars, the $1 Million to something specific then it's just this number, it's just this wish.
But if you start allocating some of those things to, well this is how much I need to afford the house or the view that I want to have in Spain.
A million dollars per year is also going to allow me to work those 3 hours per day, which means that I have to create a business model that is scalable where I'm not going to have to be super involved.
Or to make a million dollar business where I only have to work two to 3 hours per day, I know I'm gonna need this, this and this operationally to sustain the business with or without me.
Does that make sense?
But do you see how you don't think about that shit at a hundred thousand?
Yeah, at a million you have to think about how you're gonna lead a company or how you're gonna lead a business to be able to create you that lifestyle.
[00:19:02] Phil Bohol
Right?
So let's, let's start allocating some of this money to something.
So, how much does it cost to live at the place that you want to live at with the view that you want.
[00:19:17] Leah K
Euros?
So let's say, let's say $100,000?
I don't know.
[00:19:33] Phil Bohol
$100k per year for the home that you want in Spain.
[00:19:39] Leah K
Yep.
Australian dollars.
[00:19:42] Phil Bohol
So Google is shit.
[00:19:43] Leah K
That would be half.
Okay, money.
[00:19:49] Phil Bohol
Spain luxury home for sale.
[00:19:54] Leah K
Are you looking it up?
[00:19:55] Phil Bohol
Yeah, I'm looking it up “with a view”.
So this is, this is what we have to do, right?
We actually have to, like, research our shit, because then it's like, damn, now I really know.
Maybe a million is not going to get me the lifestyle that I want, you know.
And you think about this, this is where it's like, well, if this is my dream, I just want to get there in my life.
It doesn't need to be in three months.
It doesn't mean in six months, because your life will level up throughout the duration of time.
Right.
[00:20:24] Phil Bohol
Like, where you get to in a year, two or three is going to be far more of a level up than where you're at right now.
But that doesn't mean you've hit your dream state yet, which means you always have something to work towards.
And so I'm looking at Costa Desol.
Okay.
It's look overviewing the ocean.
I can't share my screen right now, I don't think.
I'll put it inside of the chat just for you and for everybody, right?
Boom.
I think.. it's gonna send.
[00:20:54] Phil Bohol
We'll see.
It's not gonna send.
We're gonna have to deal with it.
I'll send it to you on the backside.
Ideal climate.
Number one quality of life index, emphasizing leisure, family and community.
Spain is ranked number two overall of 2023.
Right?
This is super nice.
[00:21:08] Phil Bohol
I wish I could share my freaking screen.
It's beautiful, right?
It's vibrant.
11% year over year property price growth.
Right?
So now you can have properties in there.
Things are going for 1.6… 1.49… 1.5… and this is in euros, right?
So now you start thinking to yourself, okay, now I'm getting a ballpark idea of what it's going to cost for me to live this life, to have this view, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And then you're going to have to find out, because I'm going to have you crunch the numbers after today's call.
And see.
[00:21:39] Phil Bohol
Is a million enough, or do you need a dream a little bit bigger?
See what I'm saying?
[00:21:45] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:21:45] Phil Bohol
And so that's why it's super important to get this crystal clear.
And now it's like, well, if you have the home, if you have the view, is it important for you to have a car?
Is there a car that you want in Spain?
Or are you like, no, a bike is good enough.
I don't need a car.
You know, maybe that's, that's good enough.
And so a million bucks, you're going to allocate those?
So this is some homework.
You're going to allocate how much it's actually going to cost for you to live this lifestyle.
I want you to literally think about the clothes you want to wear.
Like, like, is it all Louis Vuitton?
I don't know.
[00:22:19] Phil Bohol
I'm just throwing stuff out there.
Right?
Is it Shein?
You know, there's this place called Shein.
Is it, I don't know, Macy's, JCPenney?
What type of clothes do you want to wear?
How much is it going to cost?
This house that you want to have?
It's going to have the view.
How much is that going to cost?
How much is your home office going to be?
Assuming that you want a home office, get so clear that you basically know all the prices as if you're going to go shopping for it, like tomorrow.
That makes sense.
[00:22:44] Leah K
Yep.
[00:22:45] Phil Bohol
Now what this is going to do is, as you get clear on that, that's monetary, that's all external.
The next thing that you have to do to take things to the next level is you have to start asking yourself, well, how do I want to feel in that space?
So if you can expand, if you were to close your eyes right now and you were to think about waking up in this beautiful, beautiful resort like home that overlooks the ocean, and it has the blues and it has the greens and it has everything that you want to see.
And again, I wish I could show you the visual that I'm looking at. It has all of that.
When you wake up and you open your eyes and that's the first thing that you see, how does it feel?
[00:23:26] Leah K
It feels surreal.
Yeah.
Feels like I'm in a postcard.
Just free, connected.
Yeah.
It feels like a dream.
[00:23:43] Phil Bohol
Okay, so it feels like a dream.
And how do you feel about yourself that you got there.
From all the pain, all of the heartache, all the times we were like, man, I didn't even think that I could ever get to a place like this.
Actually waking up there.
How do you feel about yourself knowing that you were able to accomplish all of that?
[00:24:03] Leah K
Yeah, really proud.
Really proud.
You know, I can see my mom, I can see my friends, my future partner.
Yeah.
Yeah.
To have that experience and to share it with all those people would be beautiful.
[00:24:18] Phil Bohol
Dig deeper, right?
Like, as you're saying that you'll be proud.
It'll be beautiful.
It still doesn't sound like you feel what it's like to actually wake up there.
And it's very important that when, if you ever hear, like, mind to muscle connection right at the gym, the same thing applies with us envisioning what we want in the future.
We have to be able to actually feel as if we've already accomplished those things.
Because what that does is it starts programming our subconscious to, like, long for that feeling.
[00:24:46] Phil Bohol
So every day that you're not in Spain, you're not in Portugal, you're not in this place that you can feel so proud that you've actually accomplished it.
The more that you're not there, the more now you're going to be driven to wake up today, the more now you're going to be driven to do your post, to do your outreach, to grow the business, because you're like, I'm not longing for the things.
I'm longing for the feelings that I'm going to have about myself knowing that I got to the level I said I was going to get to.
That I did the thing that I said I was going to do.
That everybody that never believed in me and me not believing in me, I actually did everything, and I'm so proud.
And to actually feel that that's going to be the very thing that you, you chase on a daily basis.
Does that make sense?
[00:25:28] Leah K
Yeah, yeah, got it.
Yeah.
That integrity, the joy, yeah.
And sharing that.
[00:25:40] Phil Bohol
Okay, so this is what I call, and this is what I teach to people, right?
Your driving force.
This is how we go from survival “Oh, shit. I don't know how I'm gonna pay my mortgage.
I don't know, I'm paying my rent.
I don't know how I'm gonna pay my car note”.
[00:25:53] Phil Bohol
“I don't know. I'm paying, like, all this. I don't know how I'm gonna do that stuff”.
And I'm trying to get away from more pain, I'm running, and I'm running, I'm running.
This is expanding your mind to be excited about something in the future that you're in the process of creating.
This is the thing that now, like, fools you.
And again, it's not the things.
[00:26:12] Phil Bohol
And I'm telling you right now, it's not the things, but it's who you become in that process.
It's you looking at yourself like, damn, I really came from, like, the struggle.
I really almost lost everything at some point in my life, I was really in a bad place.
I gave up on myself.
I remember this one time when my mindset was so fucked up that I almost stopped.
I almost stopped dreaming.
I got through that, and now I'm here.
[00:26:34] Phil Bohol
And now you can look forward to something and say, I cannot wait to meet that version of me.
I can't wait to keep doing all of these things, doing the hard work, putting my head down and getting this shit done so I can create everything I said I wanted.
And now on a daily, at a micro level, right?
So that's a macro.
On a micro level.
Now you have purpose to show up today.
Now you move with a purpose.
Now you move with urgency.
Now everything kind of makes sense again.
[00:27:02] Phil Bohol
Now you don't get in your way because you're like, “I, I gotta get to Spain. I gotta get to the view. I don't got time for this shit”.
“Oh, you just want to have a chit chat. You want to waste time? I don't got time. I got to get to Spain”.
[00:27:13] Phil Bohol
“I got to move”.
And this is where that urgency comes from, because there's a wanting, right?
You, you're moving from survival to just being good, which leads to complacency, to what do I want in life - because I'm done surviving.
I'm done with all of that.
I don't want to do that anymore.
That's not the life I got past.
[00:27:33] Phil Bohol
That life now I'm going to sustain.
But before I get complacent, I want to start dreaming big again, start reinventing myself, see myself in a different light.
And then you see that on a daily basis.
[00:27:45] Leah K
Yeah.
What I'm experiencing from what you've shared and created, is that my life is good enough.
But does it light me up every day that I think I'm living a dream?
Yeah, that's probably something that's not there, so, yeah.
[00:28:12] Phil Bohol
Yeah, and then we got to ask ourselves, like, “well, shit, man. Like, if I can envision a greater future of myself, am I good with just good enough?”
Am I good with just, like, getting here where I'm just like, “okay, well, that was cool.
I guess I'll just, like, be mediocre for the rest of my life”.
Or is that greater thing calling to you and saying, “hey, Leia, wake up”?
Like, yeah, you're not surviving anymore, which is great, but you still have more in you.
There's still more gas in the tank.
There's still so much more potential.
And when you start hearing that calling, you either answer it or you lose out on really meeting who you were supposed to be in this life.
[00:28:53] Phil Bohol
And I think for me, you know, when I think about it, I use that kind of, like, dark energy, negative energy and be like, ”damn, why am I taking a break today?
Damn, I have been hustling a lot…
Why am I believing my excuses that I don't need to go to the gym today?”
And that's the thing that makes me go to the gym.
That's the thing that makes me do the work because I'm like, “I don't want to get to the end of my life and regret that I didn't try”.
And most people are afraid of risk.
Most people are afraid to fail, especially after they got beat down after beat down after beat down.
They're like, “damn, I don't want to get beat down again”.
But then you got to ask yourself, like, “am I good with just good enough?
Am I going to be good enough just being good enough, Leia?”
Or am I like, well, fuck, I know at least if I shoot for the stars and I fail, I know that at least I can get back to here.
[00:29:40] Phil Bohol
Not survival, more abundance than survival, but at least I know I tried.
And you got to know that and you got to think about, like, as you go through that process, right?
How this aligns with your overall mission to want to impact other people.
When you dream this big and you allow yourself to master how you, you think, how you feel, how you can spiritually fill your cup up when you go through those processes to master yourself, isn't that what you want to help other people do?
[00:30:10] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:30:11] Phil Bohol
And so when we think about real coaches and real mentors in the world, real people, not just in this fucking game for money, but actually want to be like, “damn, I figured this out for myself”.
I really think that the world needs to hear this message.
Now you can impact the world because you've looked inward and you've started to solve all the problems that have been holding you back.
And you also know, because we are all human that we all have some way that we're getting in our own way.
You stopped getting in your own way.
You cracked the code to this level.
And now it's like, everybody, I need to share with you guys this message because this is something that really worked for me and I'm so happy now.
I went from survival mode to this, and now I'm, like, going to the next level - come with me.
[00:30:53] Phil Bohol
And so what people need to understand, just like you're starting to understand now, there's already a movement happening, but who's going to be the voice?
Who's going to be the person that continues to suffer, to self actualize, to be the leader of the movement.
And that's the process you're in right now.
So as you gain more clarity, as you.
As you learn to master this whole process even more, now, you're going to be able to guide so many other people.
[00:31:20] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:31:21] Phil Bohol
Because you've guided yourself.
And the law of leadership is in order to lead others, you must first lead yourself.
And so the beautiful part about this industry, which is why I'm also very vocal about wanting to change it, is the more we change ourselves, the better we are to serve our people.
Then we actually show people what coaching and what mentorship actually is. And so the beautiful part is, Leah.
The more that you work on yourself, the more your business grows, because the more people are like, Leah is doing something right.
She's happier. It seems.
[00:31:52] Phil Bohol
I've been following her for a year, two or three, and for some reason, every month, every week, every year, she seems like she's getting happier.
It seems like she has more purpose.
It seems like she's figured something out.
And I want to know what the fuck that is.
Leah… woah, what do you do?
What are you doing?
I want that.
I want a piece of that happiness.
[00:32:11] Phil Bohol
I want my happiness because I'm also in survival mode, but I don't know how to get to where you're at.
Or maybe I've passed survival mode, but I don't know how to unlock that next level.
How did you do it?
And that's when they plug in with you.
You see how it all kind of, like, goes all the way back to the source, which is self.
And the more you heal yourself, the more the world that needs the healing sees you, and they're like, you figured something out, and I need to learn that from you because that's the currency inside of the world today.
Yeah, making money's great and all that stuff, but everybody's starting to realize that money means shit if you're unhappy.
[00:32:47] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:32:49] Phil Bohol
Okay.
So, like, this process that you're on right now, I think you're on the right path.
I think the fact that, you know, I was like, hey, who wants to fucking get coached?
Live and, you know, share this shit in public or whatever, you're like, me.
The thing that causes you to say me is because you know that you just need a few more unlocks and you'll be on the right path to get to the level that you want to get to.
And most people so, you know, are in a position where it's like, I don't want to skyline myself.
I don't put my shit out there.
I don't want to talk publicly.
And then they get in their way.
[00:33:19] Phil Bohol
So just by simply showing up today, you've proven to yourself and you've proven to others and all of your followers that you don't get in your way.
That no matter what, just like me, no matter what level I get to, I always seek the answer.
I'm always a student to the game of life.
So now you take all of this knowledge, this wisdom, you do your homework, you implement it, and now that becomes part of your process, your philosophy, and what you teach people.
Yeah, 100%.
And that's what I think this whole world has forgotten.
And when we think about, this is something that I learned in the Marine Corps.
It's just passing the torch of knowledge.
[00:33:50] Phil Bohol
Like, that's what humans are supposed to do.
We're supposed to live life in a way that we survive, right?
We don't die from the saber tooth tiger.
We learn how to fucking live in a cave.
We learn how to cook food, how to create a fire, and then we share it with other people, and that becomes the currency.
Knowledge becomes the currency.
And so it's how deep is Leia willing to go and at what speed will determine how fast she gets to this end destination in her mind and how big her impact and her business grows.
As long as you're wanting to look at the dark side, look at all the things that most people don't want to look at about themselves.
Because they are too busy judging themselves.
[00:34:27] Phil Bohol
If you continue to seek the answer and just be like, I know I have flaws.
I know I have shit wrong with me, and that's why I'm, like, seeking these things to better myself and to also crack the code.
Because if I crack the code for myself, then I crack the code for the world.
And then the days become easy.
And then waking up tomorrow early in the morning or working late, well into midnight, it doesn't feel like work, because now you have a purpose.
Okay.
[00:34:53] Leah K
Love it.
[00:34:54] Phil Bohol
Good shit.
Good shit.That helped.
[00:34:59] Leah K
It did.
It went from good enough to bigger and a dream life.
So, yeah, thank you.
[00:35:09] Phil Bohol
It's just always remembering, like, it's the most unselfish thing that you can do to dream bigger.
Most people forgot how to dream.
Most people in this life have gotten so beaten down over the years, especially after, you know, 2020 and shit like that, and they're just trying to survive.
And it requires leaders in this world to say, hey, guys, you know, like it's okay to survive, but just remember, there's more to life than that.
And now you're becoming a leader of that.
So it's good shit.
All right.
So that being said, is there anything else I can help you with before we jump off today?
[00:35:40] Leah K
Um, so in parallel to the big dream, you kind of touched on it at the start, is the operating system.
If you're going to scale and then having a structure to kind of build your business around to create that, is that something got time for.
[00:36:10] Phil Bohol
So what I'll do is I'll have you actually look at everything that I just told you.
I'm going to sequence it together so you can see how what we just talked about personally is directly going to fix all of that, right?
When we think about business structure, business structure can only happen when you have a personal structure.
Personal structure can only happen when you take the time to battle plan just like we did.
So that homework must be done personally in order to then business battle plan that makes sense.
And what happens is, as you build your personal dream state, dream life, dream day, you merge your business to do that right, to fit into these holes inside of your day as a coach, as a consultant.
Because the more full you are with energy, with this purpose, the more you'll purposefully pour into your business.
What a lot of people do, that's a mistake is especially again, guys, this is primarily coaching, consulting is they try to work so much and spend little time with themselves.
[00:37:09] Phil Bohol
And then they wonder why their quality of posting is shit, why their DM's are shit, why their sales calls are shit.
It's because they're giving shit to their business.
And so what I teach is build your fucking life the way that you're going to be full at 100% of the time.
And everything that overflows is what you give to your business.
And that's worth more.
Those 1, 2, 3 hours of like, you being full and overflowing to your business will mean more to you than 8 to 12 hours of being fucking depleted trying to give that to your fucking business.
[00:37:38] Leah K
Yeah, yeah.
[00:37:39] Phil Bohol
So start with yourself and then build your business around self.
[00:37:43] Leah K
Yeah, I've taken one of your key learnings around discipline and put it into mine, but around pleasure discipline.
So that's the structure.
So yeah, what lights you up?
Enjoying the journey, all those things.
Finding momentum.
So yeah, I love it.
[00:38:07] Phil Bohol
Just think about it like this.
Like when you're unhappy, when you're sad, when you're anxious, when you're all this negative shit, can you actually do anything in your business?
Can you focus on your business?
Can you scale your business?
Can you operate your business?
Can you lead your business?
Can you do any of the business shit?
[00:38:21] Leah K
Nice talk.
[00:38:22] Phil Bohol
No, because you can't think.
You got nothing left to give.
And then, and then people are like, but no, I just need the tactical strategy or just need to thing.
And I'm like, but you got nothing to give.
I can give you the shovel and I can give you the map, but you got no energy to get to the fucking x.
And when you get to the x, you're gonna have no energy to dig.
So why the fuck does this even matter?
How about we rejuvenate you?
Get some fucking water in you get some food, get some rest, feel good.
And that way you can make the journey to the x.
[00:38:54] Phil Bohol
And then when you get there, you have enough energy to digest to get to the jackpot, to get to the treasure.
It's the 80/20 rule.
It's just 80% is us, 20% are those strategies.
So what I want you to do is I really want you to practice that and just see how when you do that, when you're taking a walk, when you're in nature, when, when you're working out, when you're eating good, when you're practicing all these things that make you happy, those are when all of your business issues start getting unlocks.
You're like, oh, this is the path.
It's actually easier.
And it's not in the work where you get those unlocks.
It's when you actually separate yourself from the work so that we can look at the actual business, look at all the problems from an outside perspective.
[00:39:37] Phil Bohol
You're not in the shit.
You're looking at it.
You're displaced.
That's way to grow business and solve problems.
But again, some people will listen to me.
A lot won't.
And then look at what happens in a year, two or three.
[00:39:51] Leah K
Yeah.
Being in the zone of creativity and possibility.
Yeah.
You have to be fulfilled, right?
Yeah, I got it.
[00:39:59] Phil Bohol
Then you're coming up with, like, the worst ideas.
[00:40:03] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:40:04] Phil Bohol
And then, and then what happens?
You waste a week, a month, a year with those shitty ass ideas and you're like, oh, my gosh, my business is not moving forward.
And it's like, yeah, you did the worst possible thing.
You spent so much time on, like, a solution that actually deterred you from getting the result that you want.
Most people, like, don't have the emotional discipline to say, I'm going to rest today, and I'm not going to focus on work.
I'm going to fill up my cup and whatever the fuck happens, I'm not going to open slack, I'm not going to open social media, I'm not going to do this stuff.
Most people have trouble with that because of fear of scarcity, of all these negative things.
And then what happens?
They never rest.
So they never get the million dollar idea.
[00:40:47] Leah K
Yeah.
[00:40:48] Phil Bohol
Love it.
[00:40:49] Leah K
That consolidated everything that I needed.
So thank you, thank you.
[00:40:56] Phil Bohol
Absolutely, absolutely.
And so with that being said, guys, I got a jump.
But I hope that was, you know, obviously not only valuable to Leah, but everybody listening.
Do me a favor.
Do people who need to hear this message a favor, like this post or whatever, boost it up in the algorithm, help other people.
That's the biggest thing.
All right, much love as always.
Peace, guys.
[00:41:15] Phil Bohol
Thanks, Leah.
[00:41:16] Leah K
Thank you so much.
That's perfect.
Perfect where I need to get to. I've just done a bunch of landmark and so I know what that is.
He shared, so it just reminded me to get out of strategy and get into my soul and spirit.
That's where the answers will come, right?
[00:41:38] Phil Bohol
So thank you.
[00:41:39] Leah K
All right, see ya.
[00:41:44] Phil Bohol
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just fucking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
-
In this podcast episode, Phil emphasizes the importance of being brutally honest with oneself throughout life's journey. Using personal experiences, he highlights the dangers of neglecting self-care and the toll it can take on mental and physical well-being, despite outward success. Drawing analogies such as driving from California to New York and the metaphor of eagles shedding their talons, he delves into the necessity of breaking old patterns and identities to reach higher levels of self-mastery. Phil encourages listeners to listen to their inner voice, embrace discomfort, and pursue greatness with unwavering honesty and dedication.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(00:42) - Importance of Honesty About Desires and Ego
(01:58) - Balanced Life to Avoid Burnout
(03:19) - The Key Purpose of Life
(05:40) - The Power of Self-Care
(10:59) - Process of Self-Mastery and Shedding Old Identities.
(15:48) - The Layers Towards Your Next Level
(18:33) - Experience Discomfort like an Eagle
(21:30) - Surrendering to Greatness
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTokWant more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
Transcription:
[00:00:00] And then what happens is.
Now you have this army of people.
That is literally like, forging on to this next evolution, together.
What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show. Where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance. And everything
[00:00:30] that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
Guys, it's so important that as you go through your life, go through your journey, you're brutally honest with yourself.
And what I mean by brutally honest with yourself is knowing what's really you, knowing what's the ego, knowing what's the pride, knowing what it is that's actually calling to you or whispering in your ear right now.
See, when we're not honest with ourselves.
[00:00:30] it's very easy to be unhappy.
When we're not honest with ourselves, and we wear this false armor of motivation, what happens is, on the outside, things can look really good, but on the inside, things can be breaking.
So I'm going to share with you a live example of this.
So as most of you guys know, I'm a pretty driven individual.
I'm all about high performance, I'm all about getting sh*t done.
I'm all about Holding our words to ourselves and our commitments 100 percent.
[00:01:00] Kryptonite to that is sometimes we're so driven by mission and purpose that sometimes we start breaking down the vehicle the vessel to accomplish that mission in that purpose and it's very important that as we learn and go through this process at higher and higher levels were able to stop and slow down and think about.
Where are we dropping the ball because it's 100 percent.
[00:01:30] Okay to live from a place of mission and purpose.
But what I'm finding the longer I go about this because I've had a very good streak for years now.
But what I'm finding is my body is starting to break down.
What I'm finding is my mentality, not my determination, not my motivation, not my commitment.
None of that when it comes to the mind, but just the mental wear and tear. Uh, just being on and driven and motivated. And I think it's healthy to talk about this stuff.
[00:02:00] So when you're somebody like me, you run, you go, you operate, you do what needs to be done.
Because if you don't do it, nobody else is going to do it.
There's no, there's nobody going to save you in this life.
You have to save you.
And whether you meditate, whether you pray, whether you do anything, you're going to be given guidance, but nobody's going to do the work for you.
That's what you got to understand.
So when you're somebody like me.
That operates from this higher level of consciousness when you operate from a place of surrendering to the voice inside
[00:02:30] Whether that's the voice of God, the universe, whatever calls to you.
It's very important that you remember you have to be around for the long term.
So the best way I was thinking about this was to imagine that achieving your purpose in life is like going from California to New York.
In order to get to New York and you're driving, what happens is if you are driving and you go from, you know, let's say the path takes you from California to Arizona.
What if in Arizona, because the roads are different.
[00:03:00] You pop a tire.
What happens if you keep trying to drive with a popped tire, and you're just like, I need to get to New York.
My mission is to get to New York.
But your tire's popped.
How long will that vehicle last for?
You may be as hungry and as driven as you want to be, but what's going to happen is, if you keep driving and operating with that thing that's broken, other parts of this vehicle you're supposed to take to New York will continue to malfunction.
The other tires will pop because now it's not balanced.
[00:03:30] And the more that you go, the more damage occurs.
This is what happens for us in high performance.
We're just like, sh*t it. We'll just get to New York.
Like it is what it is.
The truth is there is a better way.
And I'm mastering this more and more and more because it's different at different levels, but it's also the same at different levels.
The fundamentals are the same.
And so what I found for myself is because I've just been so mission oriented for years now, ever since the shutdown, it's been like an overdrive.
[00:04:00] I've really forgotten.
To just do my standard oil check.
I've really forgotten to take a look at the entire thing, like entirely this vehicle, this vessel that I'm using to get to this, to this end goal, this end state, don't get me wrong.
I spend a lot of time with my family. I, um, I'm going through physical therapy.
I do that weekly, bi weekly, whatever's needed.
I go to the gym.
[00:04:30] I read.
I do all the, all the things right.
So it's not that I'm neglecting myself, but spiritually, my tank has been empty.
And it's interesting because I pray every day.
I meditate every day.
So what's happening is, something's calling me to stop, to slow down for a minute and say, Hey, you might be doing all the things right, but you're not doing a lot of things to make you happy.
And your happiness is also a key element to getting from where you are to New York.
[00:05:00] And so what I found lately was for some reason, my, I have arthritis in my body because of the military and because of a major car accident I was in.
The arthritis in my shoulders have been.
So much that opening some milk hurts me doing this motion right here hurts me like just anything that has to do with lifting and I was I was talking to my therapist and he was like there's a part of me that doesn't believe that the physical things that you're experiencing right now are all physical.
[00:05:30] So what he was alluding to was potentially maybe mental.
So, for example, if these are the arms and the hands that I used to operate all the time.
And now the very thing that's causing me pain is continuing to raise these hands to do more with these hands.
But when's the last time I took care of these hands?
When's the last time I gave, I looked at these hands and actually were grateful for all the things that these hands do.
They carry weights, they work.
[00:06:00] They carry the children, they carry the family, they do everything. When's the last time I've actually spent some time looking at my hands and appreciated what these hands have done?
When's the last time I actually gave my feet a break, got them a massage, for giving me the opportunity to walk to where I want to in life?
What I found because I had this massive sh*ting massage the other day, is I've been neglecting the very vehicle, the vessel that's supposed to help me get to this, this, this point of self actualization and transcendence.
[00:06:30] I've been neglecting the very thing that I need to spend more time on, which is why there's ailments happening in my body saying, well, if you don't want to listen. to this, this voice that's telling you to slow the sh*t down and you have too much ego and pride to stop, then what I'll do is I'll make it so it hurts you.
I'll make it so it hurts for you to lift up your hand so you can type.
I'm gonna make it hard for you to hold your children. I'm gonna make it hard for you to drive so that way you can experience pain.
Because what I'm trying to.
[00:07:00] Indicate to you is that I need you to stop trying to do more right now.
I need you to stop right now.
I need you to like, go check yourself out, go do things to, to, to fix those tires, go get the oil change, go figure out what's wrong with your brake pads, go figure out what's wrong with the engine, go spend some time, whether it's a day, a week or a month, spend time there.
Because if this journey to, to the end state is a lifelong mission, we got to make it to the end of our lives.
[00:07:30]
But what God is calling me to understand now is, well, Phil, if you want to continue on this path, you're not even going to make it to the end of your life because you're just going to wear yourself down, you're going to break your body, your mind down so much that you're going to sacrifice yourself like a sh*ting martyr for literally no reason.
And it's very important that you guys understand you could be crushing it in every area of your life, but if that thing is calling to you that you're not happy, it's very important that you spend some time there because, man, God knows that.
[00:08:00] I needed this.
I needed this like slap in the face to say, Hey, like sh*ting chill for a second when you guys move at high speeds.
I mean, especially if you think about what I've been able to accomplish in just a few years, I haven't even given myself credit for that.
I don't even see that as a major accomplishment.
But to most people, they're like, Jesus, bro.
Like you went from that guy back in 2019 to who you are today.
Damn, that's really awesome.
That's inspiring.
And then when I hear that, I'm like, yeah.
[00:08:30] I mean, we had to do it.
I don't know why anybody's surprised at that.
Like, you gotta do what you gotta do.
But to the world, that's a lot.
To the world, that's impressive.
But again, it's because of this worthiness thing that I'm continuing to work on.
I'm gonna bring you guys along for the ride because I think it's a never ending thing.
It's a never ending journey and experience that you have to go through, which also has to do with why I've probably been neglecting my body.
And so what I've been really focused on the past week is journaling more.
[00:09:00] Praying more, talking with God more.
I've spent more time with my girls, like really just unplugging from the businesses and I've gotten a massage, massive massage that I definitely needed.
I could tell that I've neglected my body because of how much pain it was.
It was a two hour long deep tissue massage, and I can tell that all of those things that I was feeling were not normal.
And especially when it came to massaging my hands and feet, man, I like I almost cried, you know, while I was on the table, because I was like, man.
[00:09:30] I've really been neglecting myself, man.
I've really been like, just just sacrificing myself for the greater good this entire time.
And I have not been taking care of myself.
I was like, Oh, this is probably what happens to people once they are elevated to a point where they're like, they've made it in life.
They're like, Behind the scenes depressed, and I'm like, Oh, I think I can understand how this happens.
Right?
So you have your business, you have all the things that you could possibly want in life.
[00:10:00] And then you find those people off themselves.
And you're just like, Oh, I can see how this can turn into that at one point.
And remember, guys, like, I've wanted to take my life before.
So I understand the feeling, the feeling of emptiness, like the void.
And what I'm realizing now in even the best of times, in the best places you've ever been in your life, That void can still be present, and it's very important to be aware of that because I thought that once you get to a certain level in your life, once you have the business, once you have everything that you could want, I mean, I thought that like it's like nothing could hurt you.
[00:10:30] But the truth is, it's probably harder at this level than it was previously.
I'll explain why.
When you know that you have the car, you have the house, you have the things, like you have like the physical things in life, it kind of, um, it kind of feels weird because you're like, Oh, well, I thought that like this whole game was getting the stuff, achieving these things, achieving these, these thresholds in life.
[00:11:00] So when you accomplish them and you still kind of can go back to feeling internally empty, it's like, Oh, sh*t, like now what now there's nothing to work toward because you're just like, It's just a matter of time.
Like, there's a sense of confidence that you have about yourself where it's like, well, um, I know that I'm going to get there.
It's obvious now that I can achieve literally whatever I say I want. It's just literally a matter of time until my reality catches up to my vision.
So if that's the case, then what the sh*t's the point?
And then you have to like to get back to your driving force and then your purpose expands, right?
[00:11:30] So for example when I first started it was like, oh, I just want to be happy.
Oh, I just want to make sure my family's good.
I want to be able to buy diapers.
I want to be able to do these.
And then now it's like changing the trajectory of my bloodline and it's like Jesus.
So that's a massive thing to say and like to actually mean it and then to live every day to figure out who you need to become to be that person for your bloodline.
You know, some people say it, but are people doing it?
Are people like just literally surrendering to this entire process and like breaking down in all ways and sacrificing their comfort to become who they need to be?
[00:12:00] And I've been going through this process of rebirth the past week.
I don't know if it's because it's my birthday month or what the sh*t's going on.
Um, but there's a lot, there's a lot surfacing right now.
And I'm like, Oh. I see.
I see why I haven't quantum leaped to the level that I'm projecting, right?
So I've taken massive quantum leaps every year, but it's like, there's a part of me that wants to quantum leap 10 X and that 10 X quantum leap requires me to be so sound.
[00:12:30] It's kind of like if you're, uh, let's say that you're going to go to space, right?
Not the astronaut, but the actual, like, spaceship.
If that spaceship cannot handle the pressure of going into space, it will break.
As it tries to, like, number one, leave Earth.
Start shaking like Sh*ting madness and crazy.
Imagine if it starts, like, dropping all of the pieces of metal to it.
It would, it'll explode.
Imagine when it's trying to, like, pass the atmosphere.
[00:13:00] I don't know how it works, but I'm sure there's a lot of pressure involved with that.
Imagine if it couldn't sustain that and it just exploded right there.
It's not a matter of saying, Hey, I'm a spaceship and I'm designed to go to outer space.
You have to be fortified, you have to be really strong.
And so what I'm finding is, as I go through this process of continuing to understand my value and my worth, and like, it's taking the time to take care of the vessel, take care of the body.
It's, Oh.
There's areas of myself that are not strong enough.
[00:13:30] Which is why I cannot possibly take that 10 X quantum leap that's calling to me because it's just like saying, I'm not prepared.
I don't have the fortitude to sustain lift off, but I want to lift off.
So it's like I'm trying to rush lift off when it's like, no, make the ship so strong and so sound that there's no way that it could break or malfunction on the way to doing what it's supposed to do.
And so I'm understanding this process because it's What got me to this level? It's not going to get me to the next level.
[00:14:00] I have to completely change my operating system.
And so, like, hustling and grinding can get you from where you're at to where you want to be 100%.
But to achieve greatness, it requires such a different level.
And that's the level I'm playing at right now.
I'm like, what would get Phil from good to great?
like truly greatness, like where I can truly leave an imprint on this world, and it requires me to really master myself at a whole different level.
And to most people, I've achieved self mastery to to such an extent that
[00:14:30] I can now teach people self mastery.
But the next phase requires so much more requires so much more of the shedding of the self shedding of the things that no longer serve me and shedding the mentalities, shedding the belief systems.
Even shedding the identities, which is crazy because it's like, man, you've already achieved a level.
Your identity has served you like a lot, but now you have to get rid of that identity that got you here for you to create space for the next identity to be born.
[00:15:00] So it's like this whole game, right?
But again, it's it's you have to be brutally honest with yourself with well the reason why I haven't moved forward and again It's like it's like the same lessons that surface at each level It's sh*ting crazy because you're just like I thought I mastered this and then you're just you're just like oh I mastered layer one of that level.
But there's like a million layers to that one thing so even if I've achieved the self mastery.
That was like, I've achieved level one self mastery, level two, level 10, but for me to get to level from level 10 self mastery to level 100 self mastery is going to require an entirely different way of thinking, an entirely different way of living.
[00:15:30] And that's why I want to bring you guys along for the ride.
Because at least with all the lessons that I'm learning, I'm literally taking you from where you're at and like supercharging you to get to where I'm at.
And once you start thinking about things the way that I think about things, all your problems at your level are going to be like, Oh, it's nothing because I'm designed for something greater and then you start.
[00:16:00] Achieving things faster and faster and faster.
And then at some point, everybody's going to be all at the same place.
And we're just like, All right, guys, what the sh*t's next?
We got to get to the next level.
And then what happens is.
Now you have this army of people that are literally, like, forging on to this next evolution together.
And that's what makes life beautiful.
Because the more that I share with you guys what's worked for me, the more you're going to implement a lot of that sh*t, the faster you're going to get to the level, the faster you get to the level, then it's like, alright guys, Now it's like we as a team.
[00:16:30] As an army, as a front, as like a unit, we're going to like to break into this next level of just greatness together.
And I think that's the whole purpose of this, right?
Passing the torch of knowledge, things that worked for us and passing it on to the next person and just continuing to live life every day to master these, these ways of life and ways of thinking. And the more that we pass the torch of knowledge and experience to other people, the more that everybody wins.
And the more that I talk about this stuff, the more clear it gets to me and understanding.
[00:17:00] Where the roadblocks are.
And again, guys, the middle part is the hardest part.
When you start your journey, you're just like, I'm very excited to become this person.
I'm very excited to accomplish these things.
Then the end state is like, damn, I feel proud that I've accomplished all these things.
The middle is a huge part where like, most people break off.
Most people experience all of the hardship of becoming who they need to be.
A lot of people experience the process of shedding.
[00:17:30] And it hurts them so much that they stop because it just hurts.
And they stop digging, they stop peeling back the layers.
I mean, it's crazy.
There was this, um, this thing that I heard about eagles.
When the eagle lives, uh, don't quote me on this.
I might be completely wrong on the age here, but I believe it's 30 years old. I think it's 30 years old or it's 50 years old.
One of the two.
But anyway, halfway through its life and eagles beaks.
[00:18:00] And claws are so damaged from life, right?
Just like the natural wear and tear of life, okay, that what they have to do is because it's so painful to have it, they have to go through excruciating amounts of pain.
And the next evolution for them to, to, to self actualize at the next level is ripping out their claws and breaking off their beak.
Can you imagine that?
Can you imagine in order for you to become the next level version of yourself, you have to, you have to rip out your sh*ting talons,
[00:18:30] And you have to break your beak off?
You know how much pain would go into just clawing at yourself, and then just ripping off your talons?
I don't even know how they do that.
But, in order for them to live the next part of their life, they have to kill the version of themselves that they've been up until this point.
And then they'll grow even stronger talons and then they'll grow an even stronger beak and that's how they live the next phase of their life.
[00:19:00] But if they don't do that, if they're not willing to go through the pain, then they will die in pain because all of these things are broken, just like we've been talking about this entire time.
It's like. It's like fixing up the car.
If California to New York will take our entire life, that car needs to be able to get there.
So just like this, this eagle that's supposed to live for another 50 years, in order for it to live 50 more years, it has to destroy what it's always known, what it's always been.
[00:19:30] And it's the most painful process, and I think that that's where most people break off, because it's like, Jesus, bro, like, you take off one talon, you're like, damn, that hurts so much, I don't know if I can do the rest. But it's the ones that are like, I know that on the other side of all of this pain is the version of me that, that's great, the eagle, that that will fly the highest, that will soar, that will win.
But you have to go through massive amounts of pain.
[00:20:00] You have to become somebody that you've never been and like you have to dig deep to, to endure the pain, the brutality of life.
And I think that's what the process is.
And I think that that's the phase I'm entering right now. It's like, well if, if I know.
That on the other side of the level that I've achieved right now is literally just the rest of my life.
In order to get to that next level, I have to continue to break down all of these things.
I have to break off my beak.
I have to break off these talons that have gotten me to this level in life.
[00:20:30] So that way I can create space and room for much stronger things to grow for me to be stronger than I've ever been.
And it's a painful process because to get to this place in my life where I've really achieved everything I could want, like, if I never got any higher than this level, I would genuinely be happy.
My family would genuinely have everything they could possibly need. Like, we're good.
But there's something about purpose that doesn't matter about you.
It doesn't matter how comfortable you are.
There's something about understanding that your purpose is bigger than you.
Where you're just like, you can't settle.
[00:21:00] Because then you're failing people, then you're basically showing people that that's the lid.
And the whole purpose is to keep showing people what's possible and you have to sacrifice all of your comfort to achieve the most that you possibly can to show the world and everybody else who doesn't believe yet in themselves that they can do it too.
That if somebody likes you can, so can they. And I think that's the purpose.
I think that if we as humans just spend more time pushing ourselves past our perceived limits.
[00:21:30] I think that naturally, like the world, society, humans would hold themselves to such a different standard.
I think that if everybody practiced that, 100 percent of people just were constantly, every single day, pushing themselves to find what they're capable of, what they're made of.
I think that the whole world will be better off.
I think that we'd have people that are more fit. I think that we'd have more entrepreneurs.
I think that we would have better families.
I think we would have lower divorce rates.
[00:22:00] I think that everything, I think everything would be better because everybody's just wanting to be better everywhere.
You look like everybody's trying to better themselves, better their families, better their businesses, better everything.
But that's not how the world works.
It's a lot easier to just be complacent.
So when you have that calling and you're just like, man, I don't know what it is.
And maybe, you know, you haven't been able to break through it your entire life until now.
Maybe there's something that still calls you and you're just like, I don't know what the sh*t it is, Phil.
[00:22:30] There's just something that's calling me to be great, but I haven't been able to figure it out.
And I've been trying for years and I feel like I'm not getting anywhere.
But I have that itch, I have that thing, there's like whispers in the mind every time I pray, every time I meditate, there's like something calling to me.
I just don't know how to uncover it, I don't know how to become one.
When you have that whisper, when you, when you have that voice, just realize it, it's, it's, it's, it's a voice, like it's a real one.
It's not you.
It's the voice of God.
It's, it's, it's infinite intelligence.
[00:23:00] It's the universe.
Whatever you want to call it, it's calling to you.
So the question is, are you going to listen to it and finally surrender and submit to who you need to become?
Put pride, ego, shame, guilt, all of the sh*t that, that just are holding you back, are you going to put all of that aside?
Get on your hands and knees and just surrender to what it is that's calling to you.
And then as soon as you understand, as soon as you hear everything that needs to be done to then take action on it.
[00:23:30] No matter how much it hurts to break off all of your talons and break off your beak and just all of these things.
Are you willing to do that?
At least for me, I can't not do that.
I can't go back to a normal life.
I can't go back to a life where it's just going to a nine to five job and just sh*ting doing nothing significant with my life.
Like, I think that's why it's called life's purpose.
I can't stop.
I don't know about you, but when I'm not going after my purpose.
[00:24:00] When I'm not living from that place, no matter how scary it is, no matter how much it hurts to keep breaking this sh*t off and breaking off the beaks and just continue to evolve and level up, it's And ask myself, well, why am I choosing to do this?
Why am I, why am I choosing to continue to do this when I could just settle?
The truth is it's because I'm not choosing it.
It chose me just like it's choosing you.
We don't choose these things.
It chooses us.
And it's up to us to say, I'm going to listen to the voice.
[00:24:30] I'm gonna, I'm gonna, if I'm getting called to do something great, I'm going to lean into it and be great no matter the price I have to pay.
And that price is everything that's comfortable to you.
And again.
If you know you're gonna pay that price, you have to make sure that vehicle is good.
You gotta make sure you're good.
And again, it's just brutal honesty.
For us to be great, we always have to be honest with ourselves.
We always have to make sure that if we need a day, we take a day.
If we need a weekend, we take a weekend.
[00:25:00] If we need a week, we take a week.
If we need to cool off a little bit instead of pushing, and like, instead, we're just being, and we just need that for the season, then B. Don't push, don't do, just be.
And when it's time to push again, again, getting back into the rotation of things, and pushing, and driving, and um, learning how to hear these voices, hear these, um, it's like the GPS, right?
It's telling, it's like, as you're maneuvering through life and in business, something will call to you again.
[00:25:30] Take that left.
Take that pivot.
Go do that thing.
And you just have to trust that voice of God.
You gotta trust that voice.
You gotta trust that it's guiding you in the right place. And, um, again, you might not see the fruits of your labor for a while.
And it's just continuing to have faith. It's continuing to just move. And if you're just, I believe, more honest with yourself, just like I'm learning to be even more honest, because I'm a pretty honest guy, you know?
So I'm just like, damn, I can be even more honest that, like, these little things don't make me happy.
[00:26:00] Oh, I need to spend more time with self care.
Okay.
I didn't, I thought that was not a thing right now.
I think, I thought I just had to keep pushing.
But again, I've never been at this level.
I don't have people to really tell me what I'm supposed to do or not do next.
So it's like you have to learn through trial and error what works and what doesn't work.
And that's how you attain wisdom, just going through the process, but as being hyper aware and not just going down a Sh*ting rabbit hole of darkness.
That's what self mastery is. It's actually mastering self through trials and through failures, which is, again, why I'm sharing these stories with you now.
[00:26:30] So that way you can see in real time what that looks like.
So anyway, guys, be brutally honest with yourself.
Where are you at?
Are you good?
Are you happy?
Are you not?
Are you, and I'll play devil's advocate, are you just being a bitch?
Like, what's the thing?
Because there's truth to that, and I can say that because I've been that.
Where it's like, oh, I just need rest. But if I was being brutally honest, I also didn't put out. For me, when I'm like.
[00:27:00] I need rest, it's because I'm being brutally honest.
All I do is put out, and I never take a break.
So don't just say, I need a break, and then not play devil's advocate with yourself and say, but do you really?
Or, do you actually need to push more, and that's how you'd be brutally honest with yourself, that you could've given more.
You're only gonna know that.
Nobody else is gonna know that.
The truth is inside of you, and that truth will set you free, once you're honest with yourself. Alright?
So, that's what I got.
I really hope that whoever needs to hear this message, hears it.
[00:27:30] Downloads it, and applies it.
Because it's um, it's a very interesting path that we're all on, at whatever stage you're at, whatever level you're at in your journey, it's a very interesting path that we're on, achieving purpose.
And again, it's a lifelong mission, so don't feel in a rush to get there.
You gotta get there first. Peace guys.
-
In this episode, Phil dives deep into tapping into the powerful being lying dormant within us all – the Sage version of ourselves. Sharing personal experiences and insights gained during a transformative trip to Tahoe, Phil explores the concept of divinity within, urging listeners to unlock their potential and live a life of purpose and meaning. Drawing on meditation, spiritual awakening, and the realization of life's deeper purpose, Phil challenges listeners to embrace the journey of self-discovery and channel the infinite power within to overcome life's challenges. Join Phil as he invites listeners to awaken to their true calling and become vessels for positive change in the world. Don't just listen – take action.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(00:47) - Exploring the Sage Version of Oneself
(03:40) - Spiritual Awakenings and the Commonality of Divinity
(04:08) - The Reflective Trip to Tahoe
(05:19) - What’s Inside of You
(11:25) - Life Occurrences Beyond Coincidence
(15:20) - The Divinity that Guides us to our purpose
(18:09) - You are a Vessel for a Divine Purpose
(20:27) - Take action
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Transcription:
[00:00:00] When we think about our problems, it's like the size of an atom, so tiny.
In comparison to this all powerful being inside of us.
What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show. Where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance. And everything
[00:00:30] that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
What's going on, you guys?
We are going to be changing it up a little bit today.
I kind of want to see who can track with me.
I want to see the things that I teach outside of my clients.
[00:01:00] To just on YouTube or any platform, Instagram, Facebook, uh, podcasting.
I wonder how people actually think about stuff like this.
So, let's talk about the Sage version of you.
Let's talk about the all powerful, all knowing version of you that's lying dormant inside of you right now.
Okay, very different topic than I usually talk about. but I'm interested to see.
[00:01:30] Who can actually Not only understand this from a logical, external perspective, but internally has done some of the spiritual work that's needed to tap into this version of self.
So, whether you believe this or not, or whether you're in the process of uncovering it for yourself, inside of all of us,
There's divinity inside all of us.
There is a more powerful version of us that we have access to, whether that's us.
[00:02:00] Whether that's universal power, whether that's God, whatever it is, we all have access to it.
Now, who's aware that they have access to it and who's unaware?
That's a whole different story.
Most people.
In the world right now.
Do not understand that they have access to this power.
Most people in the world do not understand that they have access to it at all, and they live their life thinking that there are these humans that just have to live a life.
Get through the 60, 80 years that they're going to
[00:02:30] live and then get buried.
That's it.
Unfortunately, that is actually what people believe that their life is meant for.
When you start tapping into purpose, when you start tapping into this other version of you, that you were meant for something, that you were born for a purpose, that there's something that you have to get done in this one life you have to live, this is where you start leaving the physical body and entering more of the spiritual realm.
This is where you start really understanding that there's people that have figured this out.
[00:03:00] And you'll see how they talk about it.
You'll see that they'll bring it up here and there.
And for most people, they'll hear it and it'll go over their head.
They're going to think that it's just like this, you know, woo woo thing.
But when you actually start getting with the times, and you start understanding that there's something bigger at play here, this is where things start to change.
This is where, like, life changes for you, because now you understand you're playing a different game.
You're no longer playing the game of just going to work.
[00:03:30] Going home, doing it tomorrow.
You're no longer just living this surface level life.
And now what you see is the spiritual calling that you have.
So, back in 2018, when I was in Tahoe, I was feeling extremely lost. Extremely lost in life. I was feeling extremely lost.
You know, after getting out of the Marine Corps, that was my identity.
I was like, who am I now?
I started going through some weird thing of depression again.
[00:04:00] And I was like just drinking all the time, smoking weed all the time, just doing all this stupid sh*t all the time.
So I went to Tahoe and I was like, look, I need to spend time in nature.
I need to figure my sh*t out.
There's something wrong with me.
And during this trip to Tahoe, all I did was read this book, it's called To Shake the Sleeping Self.
And all I would do when I would wake up is I'd literally sit by the window, looking at the snow, looking at the world, and I'd just start reading.
[00:04:30] And I became very intentional with reading every word inside of that book for every chapter I went through.
And then I started realizing that I was living my life asleep.
I realized that the way I was living my life was so caught in the rat race of life.
That I forgot how to live with purpose.
I forgot how to live with meaning.
That got stripped from me because the only way that I've ever known that is through the military.
[00:05:00] The only way that I've ever learned how to live with mission and purpose was in the military.
So to have that no longer part of my life.
It was big.
How the f*ck do I get through this thing?
How does a civilian actually have a mission and purpose in life?
And that's when I started going deeper into now, at this point, that's when I went through very deep meditation.
Okay?
Very, very deep meditation.
If you guys have done breathing exercises, just understand meditation can get extremely deep.
It can go far deeper than what you even realize right now.
[00:05:30] What you can tap into is far deeper and far more powerful than you can even realize.
So by going into that space, what I found in myself was divinity, and it's very difficult to explain what happens when you can envision it in the mind.
Just imagine, inside of you, there's infinite space. Inside of you, there's, you're not as big as your body.
[00:06:00] Inside of you, spiritually, it's forever that way, forever that way, forever that way, forever that way.
It's infinite.
It's infinite.
When they talk about infinite intelligence, infinite everything, it's everything.
It's infinite.
There's no stopping it.
So, what I found in Tahoe was, there was like this, this divine presence.
This massive, massive, I can't even explain what it looks like, it just, this massive being, all powerful.
[00:06:30] Had no fears, no doubts, there was calmness, there was chaos, there was something that you would fear, and there was something that you'd trust.
And I just remember looking at it in the eyes and I was like.
What is this?
And why is it in me?
And as I started talking to it.
[00:07:00] It didn't even say a word.
It's like I was thinking, speaking to it, and it was speaking back to me through understanding.
It's like wisdom. And it was a crazy thought conversation we were having.
And then I realized that this same being is inside of all of us.
That we are all the same.
We're, we're basically all living the same way with this thing inside of us now who has access to it and who's aware of it, that's a different story.
[00:07:30] If you guys want to have a deeper understanding of this, go look up The Egg Theory on YouTube.
The Egg Theory.
It gives a very good visual representation of this.
And The biggest thing for me is through this, I realized that all of the things that I worried about in life were all of these human problems.
All of these weird things that we stress about in our day.
[00:08:00] Today, people cutting us off on the freeway, people looking at us dirty at the bar, or how we feel about our day, how sh*tty it feels, that we can just have a backache and it ruins our day, sh*t like that.
That it's just so, such a waste of a gift.
To waste any emotional time and space in those negative places, when we can, in fact, tap into this infinite source and live a life truly of purpose and meaning.
[00:08:30] And by spending more time spiritually connecting to this source, the life that you live changes.
All the problems that you have in life and business, in self, with marriage, all of it.
Tiny.
In comparison to what this being considers.
When we think about our problems. It's like
[00:09:00] the size of an atom, so tiny in comparison to this all powerful being inside of us that has problems of the universe, has problems of infinity, never ending, much, much larger scale, much larger scale. It's kind of like the earth versus, um, the universe earth versus the galaxy.
Even earth versus the galaxy is not big enough in comparison.
[00:09:30] So you can imagine what happens when you start understanding that life is deeper.
That you have access to a lot more power than you give yourself permission to even see or the openness to even consider that there's something different there, you live a very mediocre life.
So when people start going through spiritual awakenings, this is where they really start tapping into the source.
This is where they really start tapping into something much bigger than them.
[00:10:00] And when you really go down this rabbit hole of what life is supposed to be, How you're supposed to respond to things now, having this new sense of awareness.
For me, I started becoming more peaceful.
So, just like you guys see here, this is wrath.
My deadliest sin, wrath. When I started going through this spiritual awakening.
[00:10:30] I don't really get angry too much anymore.
It's as if I can feel that emotion, but seeing it from an outside perspective.
I can see it from an out of body perspective.
When I feel a lot of negative emotions, it's as if I know when to close my eyes and stop, and simply just listen.
Simply just feel. Simply just surrender.
[00:11:00] Simply stop trying to control the things I cannot control.
And the crazy part is, when you live and live and operate from that space, you can do anything.
Because you're not in a rush, you're not attached to an outcome.
You're just in a state of being.
You're in a state of connection.
And you're learning how to trust something much bigger than you.
Because if you think about it.
[00:11:30] All of the things that happen in our lives, let's call it coincidence, all of those random ass things that happen in our lives where it's like maybe we showed up.
We went to a random store, okay, or random gym, and we bumped into somebody that, out of nowhere else, we would be like, well, why are, why are we bumping into each other here, and why like, right now?
We can call that coincidence, but think about how many times this has happened in your life.
[00:12:00] Think about all the times in your life where like, you were falling from the f*cking sky, and you were about to crash and burn into the earth.
And right at the very last second, something just swoops in, And saves the day, where you don't crash and burn.
You think that's a coincidence?
You don't think that there's something that has caused these events to occur in a sequence, and all you have to do is open your eyes.
[00:12:30] And become aware that everything's happening on purpose?
That this is not an accident?
Can you imagine what happens if you start looking at life as if it's not just this thing that's happening to you, and that life itself has been written?
Your purpose and who you're supposed to become is already written.
[00:13:00] The question is, are you going to find that version of you in this lifetime?
In another lifetime?
When the f*ck are you going to experience it?
Are you going to have to reset this whole damn thing and try it again?
Again, if you don't know what I'm talking about, go look up the egg theory.
It's a very interesting thing. I'm not saying I'm the master of all this.
I'm just saying what I've uncovered for myself and what's helped me.
[00:13:30] All I can say Is if this is even at all resonating with you.
Then you're probably more open and you're probably more awake than you realize if you're like what the f*ck dude You just went a totally different direction.
It's not your time yet.
Don't worry about it.
It gets deeper and You'll probably come back to this or you're gonna come back to some other episode from somewhere else and then something's gonna click one day for you.
[00:14:00] I think that for us, once we start tapping into this, once we start tapping into the thing that's bigger than us, when we start tapping into divinity, when we start tapping into whatever it is that's inside all of us.==
It's very important to remember that the human mind will take you away from it.
It's very important to remember to bring yourself back.
Because in that space, nothing stops you.
[00:14:30] In that space, you fear nothing.
In that space, you are everything, all things, the good and the bad.
And you just accept it, and you see it as an experience.
And you just see it roll out and play in your mind.
You just see life totally different.
That now you're out of this, this spiritual being that's floating outside of you.
And you're just watching you.
Be that version of you, and you can make adjustments.
[00:15:00] You can make tweaks, you can get back on purpose, you can get back on the horse, you can get back on the path that you're meant to walk.
This is how you start guiding yourself.
But the question is, is that guiding you?
Or is that something else guiding you?
Is that God?
Is that the universe?
What is this divinity that guides all of us?
I guess that's what we have to figure out.
I guess that's the whole purpose of this game.
[00:15:30] Because if we're meant for something, if we know that the fingerprints we have, nobody of the past has ever had them.
If we know that the fingerprints we have, nobody in the future will ever have them, and that they're specifically unique to us, then that means there's only an imprint that we can leave in this world.
So what is it?
What is it?
[00:16:00] What gift did God, the universe, this higher power, give us?
What gift did it give us?
So we can be who we need to be and leave that mark that only we can leave.
Who is that?
What is that version of us?
What is it going to take to uncover that person?
Who are we going to have to unbecome to create space for that person to evolve?
[00:16:30] What do we have to burn down in ourselves to create the ashes where the phoenix can rise?
What is it?
When we think about that question, What is my purpose?
Why am I here?
And you truly believe you're here for a purpose.
All your other problems don't really seem that big anymore, do they?
Because now you're trying to solve a problem that most people cannot solve.
[00:17:00] And then what you do is you make it your life's work to figure that out.
You make it your life's work to understand what is your purpose.
What is God calling you to do?
What is the universe calling you to do?
What is this divinity that's lying dormant inside of you, calling for you to do, and calling you to become?
The question is, are you going to choose to become one?
[00:17:30] Or, are you going to choose to override and say, That's f*cking crazy, bro.
There's no way.
There's no way.
If that's your belief, that's your belief.
You just have to consider, Are you good with settling for that?
If you choose to believe that.
Or, will you find a way? to let all the armor down so you can receive whatever gift has been waiting for you.
[00:18:00] The gift has probably been right under your nose this entire time.
So we'll see.
We will see.
The moment I started tapping into this, everything changed.
Life changed.
Because I changed.
I stopped seeing myself limited as this version of me that was a f*ck up, that did nothing good with his life, that almost ended his life.
[00:18:30] To be a vessel.
And being a vessel allows me to serve with purpose.
Now, as a vessel, what is my calling?
What is my calling for the day?
What am I supposed to do?
See, that's not me making that decision.
It's not me thinking about it.
It's me sitting here waiting for the answer.
Just like something called me to make this video, here we are.
[00:19:00] The thing that calls me next, I will do.
The word I need to pass, I will pass.
And for some reason, again, when you live in that space, your life just completely changes.
How fast you achieve what you want in life completely changes because you stop wanting it so you start attracting it because you are it.
[00:19:30] It's an entirely different way of living and it requires you to be open, body, mind, and spirit to all of it.
Because when you're closed off, you're just like, no, no way.
Your mind will follow and your spirit will be shut down.
You won't receive.
But when you become open to life and you just start receiving, you start being, you stop judging self and you surrender to whatever it is that's trying to flow through you as the vessel.
[00:20:00] See what happens.
See how your life changes.
See how everything washes away that used to bother you.
See how much more clarity you have on why you're showing up.
See how much more you attract into your life in all areas when you operate from that place.
If something's calling to you.
[00:20:30] I'll leave you with this.
The worst thing that you can do for the world is to silence that calling.
When something's calling you to be that vessel, that means it's time now.
It's time for you to rise into the next level.
There's something bigger for you now.
But if you logically shut that down, you are taking a gift from the world.
[00:21:00] That is trying to be passed on through you.
When you think about all the hurt and all the pain you've ever experienced in your life, a gift was being forged there.
Don't ever mistake it for anything else.
So I'm interested to see who received this.
[00:21:30] Who understands it, who downloads it.
Where are you on your journey?
Because I'll tell you this, there's also people that don't get this, but they speak it.
Those are the people that make it look bad.
Those are the people that sound woo woo. It's too much. It's too much of a front.
It's too much of trying to act the part when they actually don't have access at that level.
[00:22:00] And it's still logical, and you can tell.
You can tell when somebody speaks about it that it isn't coming from the source.
You can tell.
And it's always the ones that are too f*cking book smart about the whole situation.
It's like, you studied too many fancy words.
I can tell it's not being channeled from the source.
You can tell. But you can also tell when it is from the source.
[00:22:30] Because it doesn't come from here.
You'll know where it comes from.
So I'm curious to know, who's with me?
Since this is a little bit different than what I normally would talk about.
Again, something called to me to talk about it today. So here we are. Let me know.
[00:23:00]
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:23:30]
-
In this episode, Phil emphasizes the importance of mindfulness and being present over achieving material success. He guides us through breathing exercises and meditation to help us connect with ourselves and find peace in the present moment. Drawing inspiration from monks' simple yet content lives, Phil encourages us to embrace solitude, mindfulness, and self-care, to discover true happiness within. He ends with urging us to prioritize our well-being and encourages us to apply these lessons in our daily lives for a more fulfilling life.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(00:54) - The Lost Art of Being Present
(03:40) - Mastering Mindfulness
(15:04) - The Ultimate Path to Inner Peace and Presence
(19:02) - Prioritizing Your Well-being in a Busy World
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
Transcription:
[00:00:00] Remember that you're cultivating the most powerful version of you that can accomplish anything that they want in life.But that accomplishment is nothing in comparison to the connection with self.
Nothing.[00:00:30] What's going on you guys?
It's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
You guys have to start learning how to breathe.
[00:01:00] It's something that we're born with.
It's a gift that we're born with.
And what it does is it allows us to feel present in the moments, in the now.I think we get too caught up in what we're trying to create, what we're trying to build, where we're trying to go.
We're always wanting something in life.
[00:01:30] But when you think about the best times in your life, weren't those times the times where all you were, was in that moment, in that second?
You weren't thinking about the past, you weren't thinking about the future, you weren't thinking about what you're going to do after this thing, you were just in the now.[00:02:00] There's moments where I really do think about these times in my life where I was completely that way.
Because nowadays it feels like it gets harder to be present.
And don't get me wrong, I'm present, but I'm not present.
You know what that means.[00:02:30] And when you really think about it, it is very sad.
Because your family remembers you being present.
They know that dad was there.But you know that your mind was like drifting somewhere else.
And that's, I guess that's what makes it sad.
[00:03:00] Because the question is like, why don't you deserve to live life in the moment?
Why is it that out of everybody in the world, you are the one that has to suffer living in the future, living in the past, when all we have is right now, this moment?There's so many things that you have to work through to break through.
[00:03:30] There's so many thoughts and there's so many emotions.
Sometimes what happens is they get stuck.
You can feel it.
If you guys ever do a breathing exercise where you just breathe, you put your hand on your chest, you feel it for your heart, and you breathe in, you breathe out.You just do that multiple times over.
[00:04:00] Breathe in, breathe out.And this time I want you to be more aware of how fast you breathe in because I want you to slow it down.
[00:04:30] So breathe in slowly, exhale slowly.And I want you to practice slowing down time.
I want you to practice as you inhale, breathing and focusing on all of the air entering your lungs.
[00:05:00] And as you exhale, I want you to focus on all the air leaving your lungs, passing through your lips.
And I want you to be present for those moments.
So inhale slowly, exhale slowly.[00:05:30] As you go through that, I just want you to start feeling around yourself inside.
Should look for the emotions.
I want you to feel it where you're feeling stuck.
I want you to feel it.
If there's something in your mind that that's distracting you, that's pulling you from being present.
[00:06:00] And if you were to just sit there with yourself, you sit in the quiet.
Sit in the peace, and you search, and you look.
Don't be afraid of judgment.
Don't judge yourself.Just feel.
Just look.And you just sit there with yourself.
[00:06:30] And as you sit there with yourself, I want you to, without opening your eyes, look around.Where is your mind taking you?
It's okay to follow it now.
Where does the mind go?
[00:07:00] If the mind is supposed to be here in the now, just like a balloon, where does it fly off to?Just follow it.
And as you find where that balloon is going,
I want you to just ask yourself, why?
Why is my mind going there?
[00:07:30] Out of all the places in the world and in life, why is my mind going there?What'll happen is, you'll either see words, you'll hear words, or you'll hear a voice.
[00:08:00] It might be so faint, the words might be so small so you have to focus, you have to concentrate on why.
Why does the mind take you there?What's coming up for you as the mind takes you there?
[00:08:30] Focus on zooming in on those words, focus on turning up the volume of that voice, without filtering, remember what that WHY is.
It might not make sense to you right now.
But it will.
Just don't forget what the words say or what the voice says.
[00:09:00] It's important.Now I want you to come all the way back to the body.
Eyes still closed.And I want you to just start scanning your body.
We found a good starting point for your mind, but now let's start scanning your body.
[00:09:30]In your heart space, in your torso, in your legs, in your abdomen.
Your feet.
Just scan your body to see if there's something that feels stuck.[00:10:00] And as you scan your body and you feel this resistance, you feel this weight, you feel something is there, I want you to just go to it.
Is it your heart?
Is it your lungs?
Is it your rib cage?
Is it your abdomen?Where is this feeling of.
[00:10:30] Stuckness?And I just want you to be aware of the feeling.
Because then I want you to go inside of the feeling.
If it's your heart, I want you to go into your heart.
[00:11:00] If it's your lungs, I want you to go into your lungs.
If it's your entire torso, I want you to go inside of your torso.While you're in there, I just want you to look around.
I just want you to be aware of the color.[00:11:30] I want you to be aware of the intensity.
Is it calm?
Is it chaotic?
Be aware of the energy that's there.The color.
Is it blackness?
Is it gray?
Is it green?
Is it red?
Is it yellow?Is it thick?
Or is it thin?
[00:12:00] Just be aware of every detail.Now as you complete this scan, I want you to think about all those details.
And now I want to ask, I want you to ask yourself…
[00:12:30] Well how do you feel being in this space now?What emotions are coming up for you in this space now?
Does the mind start going somewhere else again?
Or does it stay here?What feelings come up for you in this space?
[00:13:00] And all I want you to do is to just become aware of all of these things.Without opening your eyes yet, we're almost done.
I want you to slowly come back into the body.
[00:13:30] Slowly inhale and slowly exhale.Inhale and breathe yourself back into your body.
Exhale.
[00:14:00]Breathe one more time.
Inhale.And as you exhale slowly just come back into the room.
[00:14:30] I just want you to be present.
I just want you to sit there.I just want you to feel.
Everything you just felt.I just want you to allow the mind to take you where it takes you.
I want you to allow your body to be where it needs to be.
I need you to allow your emotions to be and feel whatever they need to feel.
[00:15:00] See, I think that we're born with the gift of breathing, the gift of life, and sometimes it's so easy to think that life is out there.
Everything that we want is out there.
The thing that's going to give us this feeling is out there.
[00:15:30] The truth is, life is right now.Life and the feeling that we seek was just given to us by the things we've already been born with.
The gift of life we've already been blessed with.
[00:16:00] So there's nothing more outside of us that can make us feel any more alive.
Accept the experience of life as we go through our own experience, just like we just did.
But it's so easy to get caught in the world.
So easy to get lost in the day to day.
So easy to get lost in the hustle and the grind.
[00:16:30] But what's important is to make sure that we learn most days, if not every day, to just breathe.To just be, to just absorb, to understand that every breath that we take is a breath we can be grateful for.
[00:17:00] When you practice this, it's important that you practice it intentionally.It's very important that you don't rush the process.
No matter how chaotic your life is.
[00:17:30] No matter how crazy your circumstances are.It's important.
You are important.
And you have to remember that.[00:18:00] So as you take the time to breathe and to get back to self.
Just remember that you're cultivating the most powerful version of you that can accomplish anything that they want in life.
But that accomplishment is nothing in comparison to the connection with self.
Nothing.[00:18:30] I think this is why monks are some of the most peaceful people who have the simplest life, but always seem to be happy.
They seem to have figured out the thing that the world has not been able to figure out with all the busyness and the craziness.
[00:19:00] But through solitude and just time with self and meditation, somehow these monks have figured it out.So what I want you to do is run through that exercise as many times as you need to and get to know yourself.
[00:19:30] You will be able to find what you need and you'll also be able to find how you can give that to yourself.For me, it's as simple as getting a massage, getting a pedicure, something that I learned at the School of Infantry.
(Gotta take care of your feet. They'll take you everywhere that you go.)[00:20:00] Disconnecting from the busyness of work, life, and being present to be present.
[00:20:30] Going fishing, going to the gun range, barbecuing.
It's the simple stuff for me.In those spaces, that's where I'm the most me.
[00:21:00] I want you to find what spaces will help you take the mind and bring it back to the present so it's no longer a balloon that just tries to fly away.
And in that space that you found in the body where emotions are stuck, I want you to find out for you what you need to start healing.
And then make you a priority to get it done.
[00:21:30]
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
-
In this episode, Phil addresses how to navigate hate and negativity on the path to personal improvement. He talks about the necessity of resilience, setting boundaries for personal and family well-being, and ignoring the 'crab mentality' that aims to pull individuals down. Phil advises us to focus on our goals, dismiss the haters, and embrace the challenges as part of our growth process. He emphasizes self-belief, hard work, and the importance of not letting others' negativity hinder our progress when pursuing our goals in the areas of family, fitness, and finance.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:00) - The Journey Out of the Crab Bucket
(03:30) - Why The Truly Successful Don't Tear Others Down
(05:06) - Navigating Hate From Those Closest to You
(07:09) - Mastering the Trifecta of Success
(11:57) - The Tough Choices on the Path to Success
(15:16) - The Unexpected Arrival of New Crabs
(16:28) - Understanding Life's Comings and Goings
(18:13) - Learning to Say No for the Sake of Family
(19:29) - Navigating the Waters of Self-Reflection and Control
(21:24) - Letting Go and Moving Forward
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
Transcription:
[00:00:00] You're playing this game of life for you and your family.
And if other people don't want to contribute to that and, you know, be part of the growth of that.And instead, like they want to veer you off track with like drama, you got to get used to just protecting yourself, creating those boundaries, because at the end of the day, it's you and your family's life on the line.
And the only people in this world that you owe is you and your family.
[00:00:30] What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:01:00] Let's talk today about dealing with hate.
Now, hate you can get from a lot of people in a lot of different ways, different forms.
It can be direct, it can be indirect, it can be from people you love, people you trust, to people that you don't even know, strangers in the world.Most people don't know how to respond to hate.
[00:01:30] Most people don't know how to respond to somebody being negative towards them when all they're trying to do is change their life, to be a positive force, or to help other people.You're going to have to learn how to really build your resilience toward these things, because in order for you to change your life and get you to the next level, you have to be used to people that are beneath you.
Literally, beneath you, talking to you because they have what's called a crab mentality.
[00:02:00] A crab mentality happens when a person or a group of people see a limit in their life, they see themselves inside of the bucket of life and they make a decision internally and they say, “I'm never going to get out of this bucket. And I'm going to live here. I'm going to settle here.”And unfortunately, they also come in different forms.
There's different types of crabs, okay?
There's the crabs that look successful on the outside.
But internally, they still haven't personally developed where they still show hate to people.
[00:02:30] There's a lot of crabs that are unsuccessful, have nothing to show for it and still feel like they can judge and hate on people.
And then there's a huge portion in between that, right?
Where they're successful in some areas, but again, they lack in personal development, which is why they choose to project hate.[00:03:00] The reason why that is is because when they see somebody trying to level up in life, trying to move up in life, trying to better their lives, it triggers in them an internal fear that they do not have the courage to do what needs to be done to change their life.
So what they will do is they'll project onto you the same things and the same fears and the same doubts they feel about themselves in whatever capacity.And most people don't know this. Most people don't understand that that's how these crabs work, that these people that bring you down, tear you down, that's how they work, that's how they function.
And that's why they're always going to lose in the world and in life.
And again, they may achieve success in the areas, but they're, they don't live the life that you want to live.[00:03:30] Just always remember that nobody, nobody, nobody, I'll say nobody that is more successful than you will take time out of their day to just go to you, text you, call you, talk to you, go to your social media and spend time being hateful toward you.
I want you to really think about that.
[00:04:00] If somebody really values their time, and they're really able to make a lot of money, and they're able to live their dream life, you don't think that they'd rather spend that five minutes hating, creating negative energy in themselves, to hanging out with their family?To playing golf, to driving their car, to reading a book, to talking to somebody higher, you don't think that somebody would actually take the time to do that.
[00:04:30] The only time I've actually seen actual successful people hate, and they're like good, successful people is when somebody does something terrible, and they have to speak on it.
They have to, they have to say things because they're called to say things because it's not right what they see.
So they called it out.
That's the only time I've ever seen that, but it's never, “Look at that person trying. I'm going to call them out and talk down to them because they're trying.”Now, if they're trying in the wrong ways, again, people will have their opinion that, you know, they're doing things in the wrong ways and blah, blah, blah.
[00:05:00] But the reality is, it usually doesn't happen that way.
Usually the only people that hate on you are losing an area of their life, which is why they project onto you.The worst part about this, guys, is that you have to be prepared for is you think that you're going to get this type of feedback, this hate, this engagement from like strangers, and you will all along the way, you're going to experience it in your careers, you're going to experience that in your businesses, you're going to experience that everywhere, all the time, forever, it's just a thing, right?
[00:05:30] And the worst part is when it happens from people that you love, people that you care about, people that you thought would just support you forever.
They're the ones that would show hate and it happens indirectly, right?
They just make weird comments.
They don't support.
They say they do, but you never really feel the actions.[00:06:00] Sometimes they'll make little jabs at you and they'll act like they're joking, but there's an underlying tone that they're serious.
Those are the ones that probably hurt the most.
The strangers, you'll brush them off.
You'll be able to, for sure.
But when it's people you love, it kind of sucks.
And you have to remember, as you go from where you're at in life, to get to the next level, the biggest critique that you're going to get is from yourself.You're already going to be judging yourself harshly.
You're already going to be looking at all your deficiencies.
[00:06:30] You're already going to look at all the things that are broken with why you don't deserve success.
You're already going to do that to yourself.
Why stack on all of these other people, whose opinion doesn't even matter?And it's sad to see because it really does break people.
I can imagine why, you know, it sucks.
It sucks wanting to change your life and not having anybody to support you.
It sucks wanting to do the right thing.
And like, everybody wants to bring you down or like, they're not supportive.
[00:07:00] They don't give you back the same energy you're trying to put into the world when you're trying to just find your voice and sh*t, you know?And that sucks.
But again, that's part of the price you're going to have to pay for the success you seek in life.
Most people never level up in all areas of life where they have the business, they have the career, they have the fitness, they have the health.
Not a lot of people have all three.
[00:07:30] Me having all three now, I'm telling you, it was a f*cking fight to become who I needed to be.A lot of sacrifice, a lot of discipline, a lot of hard work, a lot of late nights.
It's possible, but the reason why most people never get there…
Maybe they'll achieve like, success in career, and then they'll achieve success in business.
But their health diminishes, right?
They put on a lot of fat.
They get the dad bod, the bad dad bod, okay?(We're redefining dad bod. We're going to be the six pack dad bods.)
They let their health diminish, right?
[00:08:00] And then their marriage is suffering, but they prioritize the business, so they're really rich, but they're really unhappy.
You see that a lot.
You'll see some people that don't win career and in business and they're super, super healthy, no relationship, right?
So they're winning in health and fitness.
They look really good.Career?
Not so much.
They're doing like regular sh*t and they're not really moving forward and progressing inside of their marriage.
[00:08:30] And sometimes you have health and you have relationships.
So you're doing really good in your relationship.You're doing good in your health and fitness, but you're lacking in career and business.
And then there's some people that are just doing really good in their marriage, low in their health and fitness, low in their career or business.
So really happy humans, but they're not living the best life they could live, but they're grateful for the ones that they have because they have each other.[00:09:00] And then you have them married and good career or business, but lacking in physical fitness or married and in good physical fitness, lacking in career and business or financials.
So I'm saying, so there's, there's always something missing in the world.
And I think that at every stage too, you have different haters at every stage, you have different people's opinions and it's always going to happen guys like you just have to be prepared that it's always going to happen.And the sad truth is there's going to be a lot of people that take it to heart like so deeply that they give up on it, you know?
[00:09:30] There's people in in career and in business who get hated on for trying to like level up.
They download all the hate and then they really start self sabotage and they really start holding themselves back from taking things to the next level.It's unfortunate.
There's people that want to get right, want to get fit and their spouses don't support them and their eating habits or their training routines.
They will go to the gym or whatever.
[00:10:00] They'll post up a progress picture and then somebody is going to hate on them, you know?And then they're going to be like, “Ah, I'm not going to go to the gym because now there's like judgment.”
And then they're gonna stop forever and it happens, you know?
There's some people - okay, let me put it this way…
There's new-year-new-me people.
Those are the people I just I don't f*cking agree with.
Unfortunately, I just - no - I just don't agree with that.
[00:10:30] And then there's people that do it around that time because that's where they find the motivation and they're actually genuinely trying to change their life.They're not doing it because it's a fad or it's because everybody's f*cking doing it.
They're like, “Oh, I'm gonna change.”
Then they get looped in with all the new year new me f*cks.
Yeah, and then, they feel all the hate, and they're just like, “God damn, I'm not gonna go in.”
Those are the people I'm talking about.I'm not talking about the people that do it for fat.
There's really people out there that do that sh*t.
I don't like it.
You just waste everybody's space at the gym for a month, and it's a f*cking sh*t show.
And then you pop smoke anyway, so just don't go.
And so you're ready to actually commit and make a change because you're literally wasting time and space.[00:11:00] And there's people in relationships and business or relationships and marriage, you know?
Like they're trying to maybe find the love of their life.
They're trying to do good in relationships.
Maybe they're trying to level up in their marriage and they get nothing but hate and hate and hate.They get no support.
They get no love.
And maybe the single person trying to find love and they can't find love and it hurts their confidence so much that they just decide that love and relationships and marriage isn't for them, you know?And it happens.
[00:11:30] But can you see how like in life, in every area of your life, sh*t's gonna happen that way, so you have to be prepared that when you're trying to level up in every area of your life?If those three things make a diamond, in order for you to accomplish all of those things and reach the top, you're going to have to sacrifice what you've always known.
You're gonna have to learn how to feel like you're a lone wolf for a little bit.
[00:12:00] Because not a lot of people understand the purpose of tribe and community, you know?
It's always good to be surrounded by people.It's always good to have culture.
It's always good to be part of something bigger than you.It's always good, but sometimes people aren't ready for that sh*t.
Is it?
Can you do both?
Absolutely.
What would I recommend tribe and community?
Because no matter what, at least you're going to have people that that can pick you up, that can help you feel like you're not alone in the world.
[00:12:30] And I think that that's where people fall off because they only know their current ecosystem, their current sphere of influence.
And when you start breaking away from that, those people become the crabs of your life.
So, you kind of feel alone, you know?And that's what's scary.
That's why people are like, “Ah, pack mentality. I'm not being supported out here. I'm going to die on my own. I'm gonna go back to the old tribe.”
You have to remember that there's a new tribe.
There's a new tribe of people.
You just have to take the action to jump into the new tribe.
So you have something to replace the old one.
And again, you can do it on your own.
It's just a harder path.[00:13:00] I've done both.
So it just is what it is.
But that's why people give up.
And you can't.
For you to live the life that you want, you cannot give up.
For you to live the life that you want, you have to sacrifice everything you've always known.
And people don't realize that what you've always known is everything.Everything that you think you are and everything that you know right now.
[00:13:30] So when I say you have to be able to sacrifice all of that to become who you want to be and you have to get used to all the hate, all the negativity, all the sh*t that you're going to experience along the way, and that's the price you pay for the success that you seek?I mean it.
Like, you're going to have to drop family.
You're going to have to drop friends that you thought were friends.
But here's the thing,, are they really your friends if they stop talking to you because you're on this personal development journey?
I wouldn't think so.
I think they're selfish.I think that that's a crab mentality.
You want to better yourself.
[00:14:00] So they get butt hurt because you're no longer feeling a void by giving them attention.
I think that's a crab mentality.
You're going to have to take risks in your career, into business that you've never ventured into before.
You're going to have to bet on you so many times before you actually see a return on those bets.It's going to happen.
[00:14:30] You're going to have to learn how to put yourself out there into the world and just get sh*tted on all day, every day from, from coworkers, from people that you're prospecting from, you know, business, even other business owners and other entrepreneurs are going to sh*t on you.
It's like a weird game.But you have to remember that at some point people don't support you over time when you just keep proving to yourself, not to them, but to yourself that you're going to put in the work and you are who you think you are and you start achieving the results in life.
Those same haters somehow start believing in you.[00:15:00] But at that point, you just don't give a f*ck and you're just like, “Well, you're dumb because I've been doing this sh*t and you've been hating on me and now you're my biggest f*cking supporter. So you can pop smoke. Like, no worries.”
You know, it's like you become a different person where that's how you live and you just don't know that you never experienced that yet.
And there's going to be times where you achieve a level of success and you network with those people.
And those new people become the new crabs.
It's f*cking weird.
You would think that everybody at a high level stays at a high level, but people are human.
[00:15:30] I've been inside groups and ecosystems with like seven and eight figure entrepreneurs.I don't know if it is because I'm f*cking Brown, if I'm f*cking Filipino, if I'm f*cking 30 years old or what the f*ck's going on.
But people that were cheering me on as I was coming up, the moment I got to their level, they stopped talking to me.
They stopped showing me that same love.
They stopped showing me this and that, and I don't know why.[00:16:00] Sometimes, my wife thinks that it's because people are like, “Whoa, f*ck. Like, it took me ten years longer than this f*cking dude to do this. How the f*ck did he get here?”
And jealousy's a real thing.
And for me, I'm just like, bro, like I'm not even that way.
Like I'm not even flexing.
I'm not even trying to do anything.
I'm still the sponge.
I'm still a student to the game.
I just show up and I'm like, “Okay, I'm here to learn. I'm not here to be the top person. I'm here to learn. I'm here to better myself.”And people really do take that offensively.
[00:16:30] You know, like I've gotten hated on for how I live my life.And I'm just like, “Well, f*ck.”
Like, I live my life happily.
I live my life in peace.
I've created the exact life that I want.
And people still hate on me for that.
When I try to change people's lives through, through content, through social media, and sharing the things that have worked for me in my life and have completely changed my life, from being this guy from a third world country, to being extremely depressed, to not being depressed, sharing with people how I did that.I get haters, bro.
It sucks.
It sucks, but it doesn't suck because it just shows you that like at every level, you're just going to experience the sh*t.
And it's going to be from low level people and high level people over time.
You're going to know who can be around throughout time, those are, those are the, probably the people.And even then you have to remember that sometimes not everybody's designed to be in your life for a lifetime.
[00:17:30] Sometimes they're just designed to be there for a season.
Sometimes just there for a month, sometimes for a week, sometimes for a day, sometimes for a moment.
And again, it's such a interesting feeling because you have to get used to like having people in your life and then not having people in your life and like not being so emotionally and personally attached to like the ins and outs of that because man, I've had some really great people that I really thought were going to be around for life.[00:18:00] And then these people turn out to hate on me and I'm just like, “What the f*ck just happened here? Like literally what just happened?”
And they don't want to talk about it.
They won't fess up to it and you're just like, “Well, I'm not, you know, just I can’t deal with this sh*t. So I'm out. Peace.”Because at some point you're going to start valuing yourself.
You're going to value your time more.
And you're just going to realize that like, you're playing this game of life for you and your family.
[00:18:30] And if other people don't want to contribute to that and, you know, be part of the growth of that, and instead, like they want to veer you off track with drama.You got to get used to just protecting yourself, creating those boundaries, because at the end of the day, it's you and your family's life on the line.
And the only people in this world that you owe.
Is you and your family, like your immediate family, like your wife and kids, like they're the only ones.[00:19:00] Like not cousin Joe, not cousin Deborah, I don't know, cousin Jill, I don't f*cking know, not mom or dad, not none of those people, it's your kids, it's your wife.
That's who you owe.
That's it.
And you owe it to them to give yourself the best possible shot.
And that's learning how to create boundaries for yourself.
And for all of these things that just, they don't serve you in the world.
And you just gotta know that.
And again, it's the price that you have to pay for success.So over time you get used to it.
[00:19:30] You know, it's gonna be one battle at a time.
And you just gotta learn how to roll with the punches and learn more about yourself.
Learn about what really triggers you.
What really holds you back.
What are all the causes to all of these feelings and these emotions that are coming up for you?Learn to work through them.
Learn to feel through them.
Learn to think through them.
Breakthroughs are designed for you to break through them and through to them.
[00:20:00] Breakthroughs don't happen when you reach resistance and then you're just like, “This is hard, I'm gonna go a different direction.”A breakthrough happens when you break through.
So just make sure you actually take the time when you're experiencing hate to like pause for a second, breathe and ground yourself, pray, meditate, do what you got to do and learn to move through it.
You're going to find a greater version of yourself there.
You're going to learn emotional control more there.And that's where the next level version of you is waiting for you.
[00:20:30] Okay?
So just remember, this is an ongoing thing.
This is why you have to be in an environment where you can go through the highs but also can experience the lows.Because you're not going to deal with it once and get through it once.
You're gonna go through it thousands of times and what happens is it just bothers you less and less and less over time.
The hate can increase and your ability to emotionally detach from it just becomes more lethal.
[00:21:00] You're able to switch it on, switch it off, switch it on, switch it off, let it in, let it out.And the only time you let it in is to use it as inspiration to source, but you burn it, use it as fuel.
You don't use it and it clouds your body and your mind and your spirit.
So that's what I have to say about dealing with hate, how to deal with hate, how to move through with hate, how to use hate to your advantage.[00:21:30] Because you're already going to hate yourself through this journey of self mastery and becoming the best version of you.
You're already going to judge yourself.
That's already a lot.
Your plate is already full.
Please do yourself a favor and not choose to stack on anybody else's hate.
It's irrelevant.
And the worst part is in a day, in a week, in a month, they're probably not going to remember you or the hate that they shared on to you, but you will if you hold on to it.And then at that point, you're the only person holding on to the pain.
[00:22:00] Everybody else has left the building.
So just understand that that's how hate, anger, negative emotions, that's how they work, that it's projected onto you.
But the only reason why it stays in your life is if you hold onto it.
So I would say, just let it go, learn to let it go, learn to choose happiness versus all the negative sh*t.And at some point over time, the hate just won't bother you.
It won't even feel like hate.
It'd just be like, “Oh, it's just a loser.”That's how I look at it.
[00:22:30] “It's just a loser losing. And that's why they're being a crab. Oh, that's it. Okay. I'm going to go about my day.”
That's how I want you to be.
And you just have to start shifting the, the, the mentality in which you perceive the situation.That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:23:00]
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In this episode, Phil shares his philosophy of choosing the hard path in life to ultimately live an easier, more fulfilling life. Drawing from his personal experiences in the military and overcoming challenges, Phil emphasizes the importance of discipline, sacrifice, and pushing through discomfort. He teaches that people have a tendency to settle for mediocrity, whether in jobs, relationships, or personal health, and how this leads to a harder life. Phil advocates for embracing challenges and discomfort, like waking up early, pushing through physical limits, and being open and vulnerable in relationships. Because this all helps us achieve success, happiness, and an easier life in the long run. We should all confront the difficult decisions and tasks we avoid, if we want to live a life of purpose, fulfillment, and ease.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:06) - How a Hard Life Leads to an Easy One
(08:40) - Seeking Discomfort
(12:15) - Learning Resilience in the Military
(15:10) - Surrendering to Purpose
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
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Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
Transcription:
[00:00:00] I remember in the military, I used to see some of my seniors and they'd be like doing some crazy sh*t and I'm like, “Jesus Christ, bro. We haven't slept in days. We barely eat. We haven't drank a lot of f*cking water. You know, how the f*ck are you doing that? How are you still screaming at the top of your lungs? How are you still f*cking motivated? How are you still pushing?”[00:00:30] And when I saw that as a private, as a private first class, as a Lance Corporal, and I saw my seniors and I was like, “Jesus, these guys are f*cking - I need to be that. I need to adopt that. I need to learn that operating system.”
What's going on, you guys?
It's Phil Bohol, and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.[00:01:00] I'm here to give you the truth.
If you want to live an easy life, you have to live a hard life.
I literally just said this and for some reason I was like, I need to make a video about this.
I need to expand on this.
Because it doesn't make any sense.
When you live a hard life, you live an easy life.
If you want an easy life, you have to live a hard life.What the f*ck does that mean?
Here's what it means.
[00:01:30] Most people think that life is hard.
The reality is, life is hard because they take the easy path.
They go to a mediocre job that they drag their feet to.
They work for a sh*tty boss that they know they don't like, but they smile and pretend and they text back and they act like they're BFFs, even though in their heart of hearts, they know they don't like that person.[00:02:00] They literally would prefer not to talk to that person ever all the time, but they do because they settle and it's mediocre because it's easy because you don't have to do anything.
So you settle for a mediocre job, you commute and you drive to that job every single day, and you know, you hate it.For me, I used to commute once, four hours per day, back and forth.
And I was settling because all I did was complain that I was having to commute to a job that I hated, but I did nothing about it.
[00:02:30] It was easier for me to play victim, it was easier for me to complain, thus, I had a hard life.
When we have family members who don't believe in us, when we're just like, I'm gonna change my life, and then we start telling family members, and everybody just does the opposite of support us, which is, “Hey, just slow down, you don't wanna dream too big. You might get disappointed.”[00:03:00] Isn't it easier to just believe them and say, “Oh yeah, I mean, that's so true. It's so true not to believe in myself. It's so true that if my parents or my family tell me that I should not dream so big, I probably shouldn't.”
Isn't it easier just to believe the lies of the world?
Isn't that easier?
Thus having a hard life, isn't it easier when things get hard?
When you're going to the gym and you're like first weekend and this happens to everybody.
Every new year, it happens to all of these fakies.
[00:03:30] Isn't it easier once you start getting sore to then start lifting weights different, thus creating an injury that should have never existed, thus now have an excuse not to go to the gym so you can rest and recover and recharge, and then that catapults into a whole year passing by that you don't go to the gym?Isn't it easier to just say I injured myself so I can't go to the gym?
[00:04:00] Or isn't it easier to say hey my kids are going crazy, hey work's got me caught up, hey Everything else is the reason why I can't make it to the gym?
Isn't it easier?
To say that and use that excuse, thus living a hard life?
Isn't it easier to not communicate with your spouse and that you just completely like argue with your wife all the damn time, because you don't know how to like open up and express yourself as a man?
Isn't it easier to say I'm unhappy in my marriage versus like learning how to be vulnerable and open up to the wife that you wanted to marry that you propose to?[00:04:30] Isn't it easier to say I'm just unhappy in my marriage, thus having a hard life?
Now when we think about that, it's not so crazy to now say when we live a hard life, we live an easy life.
You see the smile on my f*cking face?
I feel like somebody said this before obviously, but I feel like this is the first time I've ever uncovered it.
First time I've dug it up for myself where I'm just like, “Oh sh*t, the f*ck does that mean?”[00:05:00] And it's exciting because, well, think about it.
When we go to the gym on the days where we don't want to, and we live a hard life, don't we get the body that we want?
Isn't it easy to now have the body that we can be proud of?
We eat right.
And instead of eating sh*t food, we eat good food.
We track our macros.
We do the right things.
Thus, we lose all the fat and get the body that we want.[00:05:30] And now it's easy because we live the hard life.
When we start going after our dreams and we tell our family, “Hey, this is what I'm going to do with my life.”And they say, “Ah, you know, you shouldn't dream too big.”
And we're just like, “Well, f*ck it, I'm gonna dream big. Cause I want big things in my life. I want, I want the biggest and the baddest house. I want everything that I know I deserve. I'm gonna go after it, no matter what anybody says.”
Isn't that the harder path?
Because nobody believes in you, but you gotta believe in you.
And then when you achieve success, isn't it an easy life now?
[00:06:00] Because you lived a hard life?
Isn't that crazy to think about?Isn't it crazy to think that all it takes for you to win is to wake up early, 3am in the morning, 4am in the morning, 5am in the morning, before anybody else is awake.
And when you want to snooze and you don't, when you want to go back to sleep and you don't, and you take the hard path, isn't the rest of the day easier?Don't you notice that on the days where you wake up the earliest, you have more control?
[00:06:30] Life is easier, because you have more time to breathe, to think, to understand.
When we go the hard path, and we're fighting with our significant other, and we're trying these things.
We want to change.
And for some reason, like we keep getting in these arguments and straining our energy.Isn't it harder to like, not emotionally react to our spouse, to our wife?
[00:07:00] Isn't it harder to be patient, to be present and to learn how to just be the bigger person in moments and just be like, “Hey, you're right. I'm wrong.”Where nobody has to be right, but I'm willing to also say that, “I'm wrong in this moment.”
Isn't it harder to do that because of ego and pride?
Isn't it harder to, to open yourself up and say, “Hey, babe, this is why I feel this way. Back when I was a kid, back with my parents, back in other relationships, this is how I was treated. So I always lash out on sh*t like this, but I know this is not you. This is more me.”Isn't it harder to do that?
[00:07:30] But when you do that, what happens?
The marriage strengthens communication inside of the marriage.
It's easier because you took the hard path.
So when we think about this concept of we live a hard life to have an easy life. It's such a beautiful thing, it's a beautiful way of looking at it.And I've been up since 3am today.
I built content for the entire week.
[00:08:00] I spent time with my daughter 'cause she woke up early and she decided to be up at 5:00 AM in the morning.
But I already got my work done.
I got to create content with her.
I got to spend time with her.
I got to snuggle up, I got to do my meetings, do my coaching calls, did everything that I needed to do to attack the day.I worked on my business, not in my business.
[00:08:30] I went to the gym, dominated, focused on my nutrition was on lock by 5:00 PM I outperformed most people in a month, in a quarter, in half a year, in a year, literally.
Because I chose the hard path, which is why my life is easy.
When I wake up early, and most days, I don't want to stay awake, most days I want to sleep in.
It's not actually a thing where like you wake up and you're just like, “Oh yeah!”Motivated all the time.
It's not how it works.
You're just like, “Oh, Jesus Christ again. I got to do this again.”[00:09:00] I've taken the hard path for so long that my days are easy to win.
It's easy to have time.It's easy to make time because I've made the time through sacrifice and through discipline.
When I said I was going to get my body back after military disability, after the major car accident in 2019, where me and my wife spent over six months in physical therapy.
[00:09:30] Where my left side of my body was like this because the muscles were so tightened from the collision that one of my feet were actually higher than the other.Which is crazy because it was pulling on the bones.
That's where I came from and I told myself I'm gonna get my body back.
I'm gonna get back.
I'm gonna get right.
[00:10:00] And then I did and it only took six months for me to go from where I was to seeing my six pack again to having my muscles popping again, feeling good again, feeling lean.
And I look back on some of my old videos.I'm like, “Jesus Christ I didn't realize how round my face looked!”
But I chose the hard path when I couldn't even do a push up I won for the day.
I said I did half a push up.
I'm f*cking winning.
That half a push up turned into a full push up.
That full push up turned into ten.
That ten turned into a hundred.That little weak ass trying a pull up that I couldn't even do on day one turned into one solid pull up.
Turned into two.
Turned into three.
Turned into five.
[00:10:30] Turned into ten.
Turned into fifteen.
Turned into twenty.
Haven't done that sh*t in a while.
But it was showing up every single day on the days where I didn't want to, especially when sh*t just hurt the most, living that difficult life.Now it's easy to do all those things that were hard once.
It's crazy when you think about life this way.
I do the hard things in life so I can live an easy life.
I sacrifice, so I can enjoy.
Isn't it crazy?
[00:11:00] To just realize that if all we do on a daily basis is seek discomfort, do the hard things, and learn to enjoy doing the hard things, enjoy waking up when we don't want to, enjoy meditating in the freezing f*cking cold, enjoying journaling in the quiet of 3 to 4 am, just time with yourself.
[00:11:30] Having something like just completely rock your day because you've got kids and they just decide to randomly wake up and just to learn how to be present and appreciate the now and appreciate the moments.
Isn't it crazy that you go to the gym even after you just worked a whole ass day and you're just like, “I'm gonna get it in because I told myself I would.”When we start seeking that discomfort, we start enjoying the hard things.
So life is easy now.
And I think most people don't understand this.
And most people, unfortunately, never will.
That's why most people are unhappy by the end of their life.
[00:12:00] That's why most people end up in divorces.
What is it, 50%?Jesus Christ!
Just don't get married at that point.
Or, level the f*ck up in your life.
So that way you don't burden all of the stress and overwhelm onto your partners, which causes, what?
Divorce.When we think about living the difficult life, the thing is, if you're not used to that life, if you're surrounded by weakness of the world who just, they shy away from that life.
[00:12:30] It's very hard for you to realize what's normal.
But when you surround yourself with people who live this sh*t on a daily basis, that just take the hard path.I remember in the military, I used to see some of my seniors and they'd be like doing some crazy sh*t.
And I'm like, “Jesus Christ, bro. We haven't slept in days. We barely eat. We haven't drank a lot of f*ckin water, you know? How the f*ck are you doing that? How are you still screaming at the top of your lungs? How are you still f*ckin motivated? How are you still pushing?”[00:13:00] And when I saw that, as a private, as a private first class, as a Lance Corporal, and I saw my seniors and I was like, “Jesus, these guys are f*ckin I need to be that. I need to adopt that. I need to learn that operating system.”
And it was through proximity.
That allowed me to become that disgruntled Marine.
The one that can do whatever the f*ck, whenever the f*ck.
Because it was required of me.
And to take that into life, it's the most valuable lesson.
To be able to continue to choose the hard path.
[00:13:30] Even when you don't want to.
And the thing is, I learned that way before the military.I just didn't know it yet.
Ten years old, everything got stripped from me.
I've had the hard path since ten.
Even before that.
Going from a third world country to the United States.
And being the outcast.
I've lived a hard life.
It just wasn't a choice before, now it's a choice.
I choose the hard path, because I want a peaceful and easy life.[00:14:00] And people will hear that and they're like, “Oh, you're not supposed to want an easy life. Life is not supposed to be easy.”
Yeah, motherf*cker.
It's not easy for you, because you don't do what I do.
I want you to understand, like, why this is so exciting.
It's like a revelation.
[00:14:30] If the secret to life, if all we have to do to win at this game, for the rest of our lives, is to slow down for the moment and to ask ourselves, what are all the hard decisions I'm not making right now?
And all we have to do is make decisions on every single one of those things.And we automatically level up.
We automatically achieve the next level because we finally done the things that we didn't want to.
And those very things are the things that were preventing us from our breakthrough.
[00:15:00] Do you understand how freeing is it to know that the rest of your life?
Is literally just waiting for you to choose the hard path now.It's the scariest thing too.
Because when you choose that hard path, then you just have to have faith.
That the decisions you make are the right decisions, they're the right calls.[00:15:30] And you have to choose that.
Your purpose is bigger than you.
Whether you believe in God, whether the universe, whether it's a life, you have to surrender to the thing that's calling you.
[00:16:00] If the thing that calls to you, it's deep within you, tells you to take the hard path and you're just like, “Bro, f*ck man, I don't know right now. Right now is not a good time. If I do that, I might be putting my family in danger. If I do that, I don't know what's going to happen on the other side. If I do that, like what, what, how much time is it going to take until like I get something out of it though? Like I can't just. Sacrifice, I can't just do that.”But can't you?
Isn't that the whole point?
[00:16:30] Isn't the whole point to push yourself all the way to that limit and just be like, F*ck, I don't know. I don't know what the f*ck this is gonna do.I don't know where this is gonna end up.
Something's calling me over there.
And it's the hardest path to just submit to the process.
It's the hardest path to just truly have faith and surrender.
It is the hardest path to just be and to live in the moment.
[00:17:00] And to choose the hard path, it is the hardest f*cking path.[00:17:30] And when you go through all of that and you finally see that light at the end of the tunnel for some reason everything changes and everything just gets easy just flows and you just become so confident and calm because you know now to trust yourself to trust the voice to trust and life becomes easy.
And if you become aware throughout this entire process throughout this journey, you'll see that.
There's signs.
You'll see that something calls to you.
[00:18:00] The question is, are you gonna have faith in yourself and are you gonna have faith in your purpose and take that hard path, even if time doesn't permit, even if the money doesn't permit, even if things don't make any f*cking sense?
Why you would do this right now when you're barely making it? A
[00:18:30] Ad you just f*cking move and you decide, “I chose the hard path, the difficult path, because I want an easy life. And I'm willing to sacrifice and do whatever it takes for as however long it takes to go above and beyond to go further than anybody's ever gone before. And I have faith that walking this path will bring me to the light.”
The question is, are you going to surrender to that calling?
Or are you going to override and say, not me, not now, maybe later.
Remember that later never comes.
Your purpose is calling to you.
Your [00:19:00] purpose is waiting.
On the other side of that decision, that you don't want to make right now, the hard call.Make it.
Commit to it.
Decide.
And stay the path.
See what happens when you live a hard life.
Over time, when you learn how to embrace that process, you'll look up one day.
Life will be easy.
[00:19:30] Because you did the hard things that nobody else was willing to do.That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:20:00]
-
In this episode, Phil criticizes the crisis going on in modern society about lost men. He expresses disappointment over men who fail to live up to what a respectable man should be. Phil points out how so many men lack commitment, discipline, and the ability to fulfill their responsibilities, leading to negative impacts on their families and society. He urges men to embrace discomfort, take responsibility, and strive to be better husbands, fathers, and individuals. The episode challenges men to level up and reject weakness, with Phil promising to relentlessly hold men accountable and call out behavior he views as damaging to society.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(00:57) - A Blunt Take on Today's Men
(04:27) - Confronting the Epidemic of Inadequate Male Role Models
(08:02) - Rejecting the Culture of Softness
(11:10) - The Misguided Majority
(13:55) - A Challenge to Rise Up
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
Transcription:
[00:00:00] Do you know how many sh*tbag husbands there are in the world?
You know how many sh*tbag parents there are in the world that don't provide?
Because they're too f*cking pussy to do anything about it?
And they talk, talk, talk, but they never do, do, do?
Jesus Christ.
This is why so many people in this world are being hurt.This is why so many people in this world are struggling.
Because these are the f*cking examples.
[00:00:30]What's going on you guys?
It's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
Soft men are what's wrong with this world.
[00:01:00] Straight up.
I don't know what it is about men calling themselves men.
Straight boys.
I don't know what's wrong with people nowadays.
Is it really so hard to just man the f*ck up and do what you gotta do?
Like, does your word mean nothing to you anymore?
Is it so easy for you to take a step forward and immediately take two steps back because you're too f*cking pussy to commit to your life?[00:01:30] Jesus Christ.
It's so sad to me to see grown ass men calling themselves men when we all know that you're a goddamn boy.
Jesus Christ.
When's the last time somebody's actually looked at you in the f*cking face and said, “You're not a f*cking man, you're a boy, you little bitch.”So many people need to hear this.
So many people are just so f*cking lost right now.
[00:02:00] They don't even realize that they have nothing of substance to give to the world.There's so much that's missing from all of these f*cking men and it's sad because now everybody else has to suffer being surrounded by a bulk of men who don't do sh*t with their life and all they do is talk.
The dumbest part about this whole situation.
It's so f*cking disappointing.
[00:02:30] It's so disappointing to, like, see somebody want to change their life, change their situation, and then immediately go to victim mode, immediately go to bitch mode.
Like, f*ck.
What do you see when you look in the mirror?
Like, literally, when you look in the mirror, and you know that little bitch is inside of you, what do you?How does it feel?
How does it feel to know that you're a bitch?
Why does life have to be that way?
[00:03:00] What was so f*cked up about your upbringing?
That your word means nothing to you, your commitments mean nothing to you, that you have to be the softest motherf*cker you could possibly be?
Jesus Christ, thank God you were never in the military.Jesus Christ, I can't imagine having to deal with your ass.
I don't think even men know what the f*ck it means to be a man anymore.
I really, I'm just at a loss for f*cking words to see all the weakness in the world.
[00:03:30] Fat, broke, f*cks, in this world, think that they're, what they say holds any truth, holds any value.When their actions literally show the complete opposite, but these are the same people that think that they're winning in life.
These are the same people that believe that life owes them something.
Do you not realize how much of a f*cking bitch that you are like?
I I don't even know how to articulate this into words.[00:04:00] Do you guys realize how sh*tty it must feel to live your entire life not realizing that you operate from a place of being a bitch.
Have you never had a man in your life, a cartoon character, to encapsulate what it even means or what it looks like to be a f*cking man?
It's so apparent why there's so many people losing in this world.[00:04:30] And the reason why I get pissed off, guys, just so you understand, it's not just them that it's affecting.
It's not just you that it's affecting.
If this is you, motherf*cker, it's affecting your family.
Other people have to settle for you being that way.
Do you know how many sh*tbag husbands there are in the world?You know how many sh*tbag parents there are in the world that don't provide?
Because they're too f*cking pussy to do anything about it.
And they talk, talk, talk, but they never do, do, do.
Jesus Christ.
[00:05:00] This is why so many people in this world are being hurt.
This is why so many people in this world are struggling.Because these are the f*cking examples that surround people.
You got kids watching these f*cking pussies, like, operate this way, and then now those kids are like, “Oh, I guess that's what it should look like. I should basically say that I'm gonna do things and then just f*cking never do it. Because that's what that guy's doing. That's what dad's doing. That's what uncle's doing.”
You guys realize this is a plague?
[00:05:30] Is it because like everybody's too afraid that they're gonna get f*cking cancelled?
Are they afraid that if they actually like man the f*ck up and actually operate, that they're gonna have less opportunity for themselves?Like can somebody fill me in here on like why the f*ck this is normal?
When did men become snowflakes?
[00:06:00] When did it become normal not to do the hard things so that way you can earn the life that most people can only f*cking dream of?What is happening that - can somebody put in the comments and tell me what's happening?
Can somebody like tell me?
Why the world?
Is it the shutdown?
Because I went through the shutdown.
I lost my job, too.
Oh, it's because you come from humble beginnings?
Me too, motherf*cker.
I came from the Philippines.
[00:06:30] I was poor in the United States for a very long time, my entire f*cking life.So what is it?
What has happened to man that you can be such a bitch and still feel like it's okay to be a bitch?
Where's all the real men at?
Where's all the savages?Like, if you're a savage, come on.
Like, f*cking, roger up, because, Jesus, it feels like it's harder and harder and harder to see real ones.Where are my real people at?
Where are the real savages at?
[00:07:00] Where are the real men at?
F*ck, man.
Like, is it just good now to just be fat, unhappy, drinking all the time, drinking all the time, drinking and drinking and drinking all the damn time?
Smoke something.
Do some drugs.
Break your word.
Is it just good to be a sh*tbag nowadays?Is that what it is to be a man?
F*ck.
How about we like, stop all of that.
[00:07:30] How about we go back to what it is to actually be a man.
To practice disciplines.
To take the hard path, to find different ways to level up in every area of your life so that way you can provide.
To be the best husband, to be the best father, to be the best human you could possibly be.And the only way you find that is through discomfort.
To like actually give a f*ck about how you carry yourself, how you feel, how you operate in the world as an example.
[00:08:00] Is that like so much to ask?
I think that, like, the world has gotten to this place where, like, soft men are invited.
Soft men are these people that people are like, “Oh yeah, thanks, finally, Jesus Christ, a soft man, oh. Now, we can predict what the soft man will do and not do, because he's a bitch, so he'll never actually do anything.”Controlled.
[00:08:30] But what happens when a real man steps up, that actually has a f*cking opinion, that says what the f*ck's on his mind, and doesn't give a f*ck if any of the other pussies in the world are like, “No, no, no, that's wrong!”It's because you can't control that motherf*cker.
You can't silence that motherf*cker.Because he's always gonna speak the truth.
It just is what it is.
Too many men call themselves men when they're simply just boys.
[00:09:00] Too many men try to defend this f*cking position, these f*cking snowflakes, and act like it's okay.You're part of the problem too, motherf*ckers.
Straight up.
There is a time, even in the military, there was a very specific way that we bred each other, and then Mothers of America f*cked it all up.
And then everybody became soft.
What happened to this world?
This is why it's so f*cking easy to win nowadays.
[00:09:30] It's easy because of the competition.
There is none.You got the top 1 percent and you got the 99.
And the 99 are just gonna bitch, moan, and cry.
So it's not really like competition.
So the top 1 percent are kinda just like, “Hey, I guess we're just taking our spot here. Thanks for being a sh*tbag. The world needs losers too. Sweet. I'm glad that's you. Cause I'm just gonna keep doing my thing. I'm gonna keep winning.”
It's so f*cking disappointing.
[00:10:00] So disappointing that you can listen to this and be like, “Hmm, yeah that guy, I think he's onto something.”But it's you.
You're the bitch.
You're the person that's not doing what he says he's gonna do.
You're the person that doesn't plug in.You're the person that doesn't commit to the path.
But you watch, and you watch, and you watch, but you don't do anything about it.
Jesus Christ, how many people need to be failed?
[00:10:30] And the worst part about it is that there's so many of these people in the world that are gonna be like, “Phil, you're so wrong. So wrong to say that you have no idea what people are going through.”Blah, blah.
You're the f*cking advocates of this weakness.
And what happens is those same sh*tbags, you go back to their family and their family suffers and you have no f*cking idea the suffering they have to deal with because of that sh*t bag.
Yet you defend them because it's the right thing to do.
[00:11:00] It's just a f*cking just, “Don't be mean, Phil!”
Ah, Jesus Christ.
What has happened to our world?
I am just, I'm at a loss for words because, at least for me, I thought that there was something to be proud of to be the best version of you.
[00:11:30] I thought that people genuinely understood that by seeking the best versions of you, by taking the hard path that nobody else is willing to take because they're just not strong enough to handle the path, I thought men genuinely sought that out on a daily basis.How stupid of me to have believed that.
That it's actually far fewer men than I even realized.
[00:12:00] Because most men are the biggest f*cking fraud, pussies, bitches in the f*cking world.
And all of them are going to show up in the comments and defend each other's position.Do it.
Prove my point.
Prove to the world that bitches will continue to protect the other bitches and snowflakes of the world.
Prove the point.
[00:12:30] And if you're a real one, and if you're really a man, you don't have to defend yourself.
You don't have to say anything.
Just go f*cking do your job, do your duty, and level the f*ck up.Stop with the excuses.
Stop with the victim sh*t.
Stop with the snowflake, the bitch-assery, all of the sh*t.
Where you look yourself in the f*cking mirror and you're not happy with what you see back.
Enough with it.
[00:13:00] On a daily basis all you gotta do is prove to yourself who the f*ck you think you are.Because we all f*cking know it's just thoughts.
You haven't even been proven yet.
You haven't even done anything to deserve that.
You don't rate that sh*t.
You haven't proven sh*t.
Go f*cking prove it.
Then we'll talk.
But the next time one of you motherf*ckers actually allow another f*cking man to be weak, you're part of the f*cking problem.You're breeding weakness.
Just understand that.
[00:13:30] It's a f*cking shame to see that in the world.
It's a shame to see that people think that that's f*cking normal.
That's not normal.
That's the stupidest sh*t I've ever seen in my life.
And I'm going to make sure here's my commitment to all of you and the world.I'm going to call that sh*t out on a daily basis forever moving forward because that's the stupidest sh*t I've ever seen in my f*cking life.
Level the f*ck up, because it's not about you.
[00:14:00] There's so many f*cking people that depend on you to rise the f*ck up and become a better man.
And every single time you act like the b*tch that you are, you're failing somebody else.And all of you other snowflakes who want to defend that motherf*cker just realize, they're not the ones that have to suffer.
That wife, those kids, those people that they're responsible for are gonna suffer because you f*cking snowflakes protect all these other snowflakes.
[00:14:30]Dumbest sh*t of my life.
Square your sh*t away.
If you think it's normal to operate that way, oh my god, I cannot wait until your wife f*cking leaves you.I cannot wait until that family is f*cking grown enough to understand what kind of a sh*tbag dad you are.
What kind of dumbass you are.
I can't wait for your family to see who the f*ck you're not.
Then maybe one day, when it's too f*cking late, you'll realize how stupid you were for listening to all the f*cking snowflakes that are losers in life.
[00:15:00] And now you just wasted the one f*cking shot you had.That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you've learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:15:30]
-
In this episode, Phil talks about how important it is to always try to be the best version of yourself. He says that people shouldn't just accept things as they are, especially if they're not happy. Phil encourages everyone to work hard to improve their lives, whether it's by getting fit, doing better in business, or just being more positive. He believes that by pushing ourselves and not being afraid of hard work and challenges, we can inspire others and make a big difference in the world. This episode is all about not giving up, aiming high, and not being okay with settling for mediocrity.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(00:59) - A Call to Action Against Complacency
(04:03) - How Your Unlived Potential Affects Those Around You
(08:16) - How Suffering Shapes the Strongest Leaders
(09:47) - The High Cost of Settling
(12:48) - Why Not All Advice is Equal
(14:47) - The Daily Commitment to Growth
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Want more? Join my email list: https://philbohol.com/subscribe
Transcription:
[00:00:00] Imagine if you hear the calling and instead of leaning into it, stepping forward to find that version of you, you're just like, “It's going to be somebody else. If it's not me, it'll be somebody else. Somebody else will take that spot.”The thing that you don't realize is the person that might take that spot might not come for another generation or two.
[00:00:30] What's going on you guys?
It's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:01:00] I will never understand why people are okay with settling for where they're at in their life.
If you're not happy in your life, you have to know that you don't have to just say, “This is my life.”You don't have to just say, “This is where I'm at. This is where I'm going to be. This is it.”
If you don't have the body that you want, you don't have to settle for that body.
If you're like, “Damn, I don't look good.”
[00:01:30] You can actually get after it, go to the gym and get right.
If you don't like your mentality, because you're always in a negative state, you can actually drop all of the vices, the drinking, the smoking, the drugs, all of the things that you're doing that keeps your mentality in such a dark place.You can drop all of that and start like filling yourself up with time and nature, going to the gym, reading, learning, experiencing life.
You can choose to do that.
If you're not happy with your financials, you can go after getting a promotion.
[00:02:00] You can build your business even more.
You can literally do anything right now to change your life.But there's like this weird feeling in the world that I get.
I sense that in the world, everybody's just complacent.
I don't know if it's inflation, I don't know if it's excuses because of a global shutdown and the aftermath of it.
I don't know if people are just now conditioned to just settle for the life that they have or the life that they feel like they've been given.[00:02:30] What happened to the times where people were like, “Hmm, I want more from life. I want to see what I'm capable of. I want to see how high I can go. I want to see where I can really take this life and actually get after it.”
There's so many people that look the part, you know?
They really do look the part they post themselves on social media.
Like they got it going on, but you can just hear it in them.
[00:03:00] You can sense it in them that there's like this, this longing to want to be something more.
There's like a passiveness to how they speak and you're just like, “Damn, like. You look the part, but I can tell like inside of you there's a weakness.”
Why?
I don't know why people live with that weakness.
I don't know why people are like waking up every single day and they're like, “You know what? I stay in decent shape. I have an okay job. My business is doing all right. I can't complain. I think this is it.”
[00:03:30] If you're at a position where you're just living life, where you're just like, “Meh, you know, it could be worse. I can't complain, I'm doing better now.”
But you know, deep down, you deserve more, you deserve to have more, and you don't get after it.
You're what's wrong with the world.
[00:04:00] What happened to the times where people were really pushing themselves to be the best in the game for themselves, so that way it can show everybody else what's possible.I think that people are too selfish nowadays.
I think people are too afraid to put themselves out there because it's actually really easy right now to separate yourself from the pack.
What I mean by that is it's very easy for somebody to like to step outside of the crowd and all eyes are now on you.And I think a lot of people are just afraid of the spotlight.
[00:04:30] I think a lot of people are just afraid of being seen because there's a sense of judgment that will come.
And that judgment might come from self, might come from family, might come from loved ones.It might come from your spouse and it definitely will be coming from all of these random strangers online and in the world.
But what happens to the people when they don't have examples that they can follow?
When they can't see somebody level up in every area of their life throughout time to serve as inspiration?Think about your life.
[00:05:00] Have you ever had somebody in your life whether it was like a movie, whether it was like a cartoon character?I don't know, like back in the day, I used to look up to people in Dragon Ball Z.
I'd be like, “Damn! Imagine if we could go Super Saiyan! Imagine if we could do all that stuff! Imagine if we could just be jacked all the time, and like, just look at that aesthetic!”
Something to look up to.
Maybe they were like, eventually you're like, “Oh look, people in the military! Those guys look awesome. They're so badass, like carrying their systems and just looking strong as f*ck. I want to be like them one day.”
[00:05:30] Or being an entrepreneur and looking up to entrepreneurs and being like, “Damn, they changed the game. They have a beautiful life. They're giving an awesome life to their family. Like, look at what they're doing. They're speaking on stage. They're doing all this stuff. I want to do that.”
Can you imagine what would have happened if you didn't have any of those examples?
If like, nothing existed that inspired you to know what was possible.
You see what I'm saying?
And do you see how selfish it is for you to know that you have something inside of you that is great.It has the potential to be great, but you have to cultivate it.
You have to nurture it.
[00:06:00] And you're choosing not to, because you're just like, I'm going to settle.
I'm going to be good.
I kind of looked the part right now.
I can't complain.
I don't want to risk any more because I'm like, “I got here.”Ah, man, just think about how much you're really lying to yourself.
It's a shame.
It's a shame that you don't believe that you can do more.
You can have more than that.
You can be more.
[00:06:30] It's a shame because there's somebody that's probably looking up to you right now that you don't even realize that's like, “Damn, I wonder if they're going to go after it. I wonder if they're going to take the big leap. I wonder if they're going to do the thing that every one of us from where we're from, we're afraid of, but this person, they have the potential.”
Imagining like, you have people, cause there are people right now, that are looking up to you and they're like, they're waiting for you, they're just like, alright, are you gonna make the move?
You gonna do the thing?
Because you know that we're not gonna do it.
But if we see you do it might help us break through in our belief.
[00:07:00] And then imagine if you don't deliver that.
Imagine if you hear the calling and instead of leaning into it, stepping forward to find that version of you, you're just like, “It's going to be somebody else. If it's not me, it will be somebody else. Somebody else will take that spot.”The thing that you don't realize is the person that might take that spot might not come for another generation or two.
[00:07:30] That the person that's going to replace you is not going to be around potentially for another couple of generations.
You don't know.
So there's going to be a gap, a massive gap and my whole thing.
In my bloodline is to be that person that just shows everybody what's possible.Because if I show everybody what's possible, the next generation they're gonna know that at least they need to get to grandpa's level.
At least they need to get to dad's level.
[00:08:00] And then just outperform the f*ck out of me like I'm looking at every generation that comes after me and I'm excited for them.
I'm like, “The more that I push in this life, the more I get to show my people we're winning. We can win. We can just continue to sacrifice, suffer, and become the best versions of us.”
Because some people, I think they associate sacrifice and suffering with a negative connotation.
But the truth is I love to sacrifice.
I love to suffer.
Like that's where I grow the most.
[00:08:30] Like I seek that and you have to get to the level where like, you know, it's like survival, then you're starting to thrive.
And then at some point you like seek discomfort.
At some point you seek all of the things that, you know, were turning you into a diamond.
Not everybody gets to that level.
It is what it is because you have to really know that everything that challenges you in your life, it's happening for you.
It's not happening to you.
[00:09:00] So if you know it's happening for you, then you start seeking and you're just like, “More, more, give me more. Give me more trials. Give me more adversity. Show me more strength. Because the more adversity I face, the stronger I become.”
And everything now becomes proof.
Everything that you go through, every lesson, every trial, every experience is like me becoming stronger.
And that's how I look at it.
But a lot of people are like, “Damn, I don't want to sacrifice. That's not a good way to live. Damn, I don't want to do that. I don't want to suffer.”
[00:09:30] But it's like, damn, when you guys look at the military, and you see those hard motherf*ckers, you do realize that the reason why they look like that, the reason why when I carry a machine gun on my back, it looks badass, is because of suffering that you have to go through to earn being able to look like that, to look so f*cking disgruntled because you know who you are, and you know who everybody's not.
I want you to remember that if you settle for this life, there will be that presence about you.
People will be able to smell that on you.
[00:10:00] You will know when you look in the mirror, or when you don't because you don't want to see you, that you f*cking settled.
Do not waste this one life you got, and settle.
Because, I don't know how old you are.
I don't know if you got a family, if you got a lot of babies, if you got one baby, if you got one on the way, I don't know.
But the earlier you start, the more time you got to fix it even if you do f*ck it up.
[00:10:30] The later in the game you start, the more that you're risking.
Because you don't got that much time left.
And like, you have to remember that like, it's just a blip of time, it's just a blip of discomfort.
[00:11:00] If you can sacrifice in the earlier years of your life, starting now, especially if you're settling, and you're just like, “Alright, cool. I'm starting a little late, but late is better than never.
Day 1. What am I gonna do to push? What am I gonna do to prove to myself and let this be my story even this late in the game?”
What, I mean, by late in the game, for you might be 20, might be 25, might be 30, might be 40, might be 50.
Whatever late in the game is for you and you choose that.
“I'm going to show everybody that even at this level, I can start right now and I can still dominate. I can still win.”
Let that be your story.
Prove to yourself that that means something that you can actually deliver on something.
[00:11:30] Because I'm telling you guys right now, when you live day to day, and you're actually proud of the work that you're putting into each day.
That you're not just like, settling and letting the day pass you by, you're not letting life just pass you by, and you're actually like, putting out on a daily basis to find yourself.Life is worth living again.
A life of purpose means everything.
[00:12:00] And you start holding yourself to such a standard where you're just like, “Damn, I don't think I could ever go back to a normal life where all I do is like, work a job, drink, get fat as f*ck, and then do nothing with my life. I could never go back to that.”
Cause for me, work, hit the bar, double jacking coats, long Island iced teas, get two double western bacon cheeseburgers and a large fries at Carl's Jr., call it a night, rinse and repeat the next day.
Maybe go to the gym, I don't know.
So easy to live that life.
[00:12:30] It's so easy to be miserable.
It's a lot harder to actually love your life.
Because you actually have to work towards it.
Because you have to prove to yourself through the work that you're worth that.
You're worth living a great life.
You're worth living and experiencing a beautiful life.
But you guys can't settle.
Don't ever feel or let anybody make you feel.
That all you have to do in this life is settle and that you have to play it small.You have to play it safe.
[00:13:00] Those are not the people that you should be listening to.The only people you should be listening to are people that you would replace or change places with, or that have walked the path that you want to walk.
They've accomplished the thing that you want to accomplish in that one field or in all fields.But if you wouldn't change places with them, if you wouldn't live their life and like you'd be good with that for the rest of your life, that's not really people you should listen to.
And unfortunately, a lot of the time that's like mom and dad.
That's like brother, sister.
[00:13:30] Those are like the people that you love the most and you're just like, “Damn, if I'm being real with myself, I wouldn't really live their life, you know?”And if you're real like that, then you should start understanding that those are probably not the people you should be listening to, that you should be seeking guidance and counsel from.
I'm not saying that they don't have anything important to pass on to you.
What I am saying is if you listen to them for guidance, they're probably going to lead you to the path that led them to where they're at in their life.[00:14:00] And if you don't want to replace your life for their life, if you don't want to exchange places with them, I would recommend, from a guy living the best life I could have ever dreamed of, to not listen, or to be more selective of where you're seeking guidance from.
Take the meat, leave the bones.
Take that they love you, take that, that they want the best for you, leave everything else.
[00:14:30] Because again, if they haven't accomplished what you want in all years of your life, health, wealth, relationships, then it probably makes sense to only listen to them if you're like, “Maybe they're really terrible in business or money and health, but they have a beautiful marriage, you know?”
Listen to them about that stuff, but you don't need to take it all because if you take it all from the wrong person, you're going to settle for a life that you're not going to be happy with.And if you just commit to yourself for the next 365 days.
To do something uncomfortable every single day, just watch how your life changes in just one year.
[00:15:00] Don't mistake these little things that you change on a daily basis because they're not like rapid, crazy changes that are happening that it's not doing something.
Every uncomfortable thing that you do on a daily basis is getting you closer to a version of you that you can be proud of.
Just remember that.
Start today.
It's day one.
[00:15:30] No matter how old you are, no matter where you're at in your journey, no matter if you have to reset because some sh*t happened, I don't know, start today.
Do not settle for this life, know that you can have more, know that you're the person that can give more to you and your family, but you gotta sacrifice.
You gotta get after it, and you gotta suffer, to be deserving of that life.That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said, and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:16:00] -
In this episode, Phil talks about the importance of perseverance and self-belief in achieving personal and professional goals. He shares his experiences of overcoming challenges and highlights the need for resilience in the face of adversity. Emphasizing the importance of small, consistent steps and a positive mindset, Phil provides insights on how to transform our lives and realize our dreams through dedication and hard work. This episode is a powerful reminder to embrace failures as part of our journey towards success.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:31) - Always Embracing Perseverance(05:38) - Reinventing Yourself
(09:44) - The Importance of Defining Your Dreams in Detail
(11:52) - Reverse Engineering Success
(12:58) - Embracing Messy Action
(14:29) - Enjoying the Process Leads to Faster Success
(18:37) - Focusing On The Immediate Next Step
(21:39) - The Power of Doing Your Best Daily
(22:44) - The Continuous Journey of Self-Improvement
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Transcription:
[00:00:00] You're going to get kicked in the face.
It's going to try and test you on a daily basis.
There's going to be some days where you're like, “No, I'm gonna crush this. I'm ready to fail. I'm in it to win it.”
And the very next f*cking hour, you're like, “Jesus Christ. Ah, was this the right decision? Should I keep doing this? Damn it.”
And then again, you wake up the next day.
You're like, “I'm going to crush this.”Get kicked in the teeth again.
[00:00:30] And you're just like, “Jesus, man, I don't even - ah, it's only been two days. And every day it's like that cycle.”And for some reason, you just focus on, “OK, I'm going to get hit in the face again. I'm going to get hit in the face again.”
And then one day you look up and you're just like, “Oh, sh*t. My whole life has changed. I'm still getting kicked in the teeth, but like, my whole life has changed. I don't even know how I'm doing it, but I'm just doing my best every day.”
[00:01:00] When you can just do your best every day, you win.
What's going on you guys?
It's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:01:30] Guys, today we're going to talk about how to keep going when you don't see results.
I think this is everybody's f*cking problem.
Look, you're going to go through a lot in your life.
You're going to go through so many trials in your life.
Doesn't matter what season you're in, doesn't matter if it's, if it's personal related, if it's relationship related, if it's career or business related, doesn't matter.[00:02:00] You're going to go through so much sh*t in your life to get to where you're wanting to go.
And the biggest thing that you have to remember that that causes anybody to be unsuccessful or successful is their ability to continue to persevere even if they don't see those results.
You're gonna get broken off, or life, God, the universe will try every single thing to see how long can you stay in the fight for.And you gotta remember that most people don't stay in the fight for that long.
[00:02:30] Most people in this world, they talk and they talk and they talk, and they say, they say, they say.
They say they're gonna do these things that are amazing in life.
And they don't follow through because in the mind, the mind says that we want these big bad goals.We want to have the lifestyle.
We want to have the money.
We want to have the house.
We want to have the cars.
We want to have the family.
We want to have all of that stuff in our mind.
It feels so good to like, to think about that, to dream about it, to, to see ourselves in those situations in those environments.[00:03:00] We're just like, damn, that's going to be so amazing.
Once I'm there, it's going to feel so amazing.
Once I've achieved all of those things.
And then they like try for like a second, and then like it hurts, it sucks, it hurts.The things that you have to do in a relationship, you want to have the perfect relationship, you want to get married one day, you want to have kids, and then you still have ego, you still have pride, you still like talk down to people, you still treat people like sh*t, you still take things personal.
[00:03:30] How the f*ck are you going to attract the perfect partner for yourself if you still act that way?
Or maybe you're not good with your money, or maybe you're not responsible.
Maybe you're just drinking all the time.
Maybe you're always high.
Maybe you're not doing anything to attract somebody who actually wants to get married to that.Like, if you're not somebody that somebody good wants to get married to, is that their fault?
Is that the world's fault?
Or is that your fault for not becoming who you need to be?
[00:04:00] You can want the marriage, you can want the relationships, you can want the best person you could possibly f*cking attract.
But are you that person that they would be attracted to?See, the thing about relationships is, you don't seek a relationship.
You become the best version of you.
And that best version of you attracts the people that would be attracted to that version of you.[00:04:30] But what it takes for you to go from the sh*t bag to the perfect version of you for now, that's good enough to find that relationship.
It's going to take a lot of work in the middle.
A lot of personal, you're going to have to drop the drinking, you're going to have to drop the smoking.
You're going to have to get into the gym.
You're going to have to like take your career or your business seriously.
So that way you're not struggling just to get by.And then once you have a little bit of stability, that perfect partner will like notice you.
Or maybe because you're going to be in different scenarios, instead of being at the bar or going out to drinks with friends, you're at the gym, maybe you bump into her there.
[00:05:00] Or maybe, like, you go to a networking event, because, like, you're taking your business and your career seriously.Instead of getting high, you're at a networking event, and maybe you bump into her over there.
But do you see how the different actions that you take result in different things?
But if you're always doing the same bullsh*t, that's gotten you to where you're at right now in life, you're never going to have different variables.You're never going to have different outputs because the input will be the same.
[00:05:30] When we think about your business, when we think about life, when we think about leveling up in every single area, the work in the middle of where you're at to where you want to get to, the work in the middle is where everybody breaks off.You have to remember that you're going to get here when you get here.
There's really no way to accelerate this part of your personal development.
Now, how fast somebody can personally develop, that's the only thing that that changes, right?
So instead of taking 10 years, maybe it takes five, maybe it takes one, maybe it takes a week.It's probably not going to take a week.
Let's just, let's just be real.
[00:06:00] Your ability to completely change and reinvent yourself.
At a rapid rate, will allow you to condense that time.
When you learn from mentors, when you learn from people that have already walked the path you want to walk, you condense that time.But it's different for different people.
People, like me, can drop who the f*ck we've seen ourselves as.
Like, for our entire life, if I've seen myself one way, I can completely drop that version of me today.
And then I can start becoming the newest version of me.
Most people can't do that because what happens?[00:06:30] Most people are like, “Oh, well, sh*t. If I start changing how I've been this entire time, like what happens if my family starts judging me and they start hating on me, because they've known me to be like this drinker, this smoker, this like loser in life? And then I just flip a switch and decide like, I'm this happy, successful person that's driven and motivated to crush life. Like, what if they don't believe in me? Like, what if my coworkers don't believe in me? What if like all these people that have always known me to be this way, don't believe in me?
[00:07:00] It's like, bro, duh.
Why would they believe in you?
Like, listen to what you're saying right now.
You don't even sound like you believe in you.Why would anybody else believe in you?
You have to believe in yourself for far longer than anybody.
We'll ever start like you have to do that for years.
[00:07:30] You have to believe in yourself for years while everybody's hating on you, while everybody's doubting you, while nobody is like cheering you on, even though you think they are.They're just like, “Ah, no, no, no, f*cking you got it.”
But then in the back of their mind, they're like, “No, you don't. You've been drinking this whole time. You've been smoking this whole time. You've been doing stupid sh*t this whole time. You're not doing it.”
That's what's happening in their mind.
And if you absorb that, and you choose to believe all of these other people versus believing in yourself, of course nobody's gonna believe in you.
You have to believe in you far longer than anybody else will start to, and you just gotta accept that for what it is.And that's where most people just stop.
[00:08:00] Like, you're so worried about what mom and dad think, what brother and sister think, what cousin, auntie, uncle, uh, friend, best friend, acquaintance, co worker, people, strangers, random people on the internet.
You're so concerned about them that it's like, but why can't you just do it for you?Why can't you just drop this identity that no longer serves you for you and just be like, “No, I'm this person now.”
I'm not saying, like, be somebody that you're not.
[00:08:30] What I am saying is if you're like, “Hey, I'm gonna go get a haircut so that way I look more sharp. If I'm gonna dress up a little bit, maybe just wear a regular t shirt versus pajamas every single day.”I don't know.
“Maybe I'm gonna clean up my face a little bit so that way, you know, it doesn't look like my f*cking facial hair is all over the place. Maybe I'm gonna take a bath every day versus -”
I don't know.
(People, please. I hope you don't do th*s sh*t every couple days, you know, like just little things.)
[00:09:00] “Oh, I'm gonna actually clean my car, so that way it doesn't smell like Carl's Jr. in there all the damn time.”
“Maybe I'm gonna clean the outside of my car so it doesn't look like I haven't washed it in years and I'm actually gonna take care of my sh*t.”
“Maybe I'm gonna clean my office so that way it's actually fun to work in my office.”
If you don't have an office, maybe you're going to clean your house because you actually like hold yourself to a standard, level up, do those things, believe in yourself.
Doesn't matter.
Like people are so worried about the results that they're not putting in the work in themselves and in a daily basis to earn that result one day.[00:09:30] People are like, “Oh, I don't have it yet. I don't have it yet. I don't have it yet. I don't have it.”
But it's like, you never will.
You never will if you don't start the work here.Right now.
Today.
Right after this.
Okay?
After you listen to this, right after this, get to work.Because how do you keep going?
You have to like, really think about why you're doing this.Why are you in this game of life?
[00:10:00] Because what you can do, and I tell this to my clients all the time, what you can do is go look into the corner.
There's a door.
That door leads to mediocrity.
The door is always available for you.
There's no lock.
Nobody's going to lock you out of that.
You can literally walk through that right now.You can choose to, but the point is you haven't, you haven't just walked through that door, which means that there's a part of you that believes that you can break through, but you have to break through.
You can't like bounce off the wall.
You actually have to push and break through.[00:10:30] So the biggest thing that you have to remember is like you can set a target, you can set your GPS of like, “Okay, in my life, I want to have our dream home. And this is what it looks like, this is the state that I want to live in, this is the country I want to live in, this is like how many bedrooms it's gonna have, how many bathrooms, because we're gonna have this many kids.”
Like, get so clear on where you're setting the destination.
And then the next thing is like, “Okay, well this is the car that I want, I just want a nice family BMW. Maybe I want a - I don't know - a Tesla.”Maybe you want the Lambo.
[00:11:00] I don't know whatever it is for you.
You what color is it?
What year is it?
What do the rims look like?
What does the interior look like?
How does it smell in there?
Like all of it get clear set the GPS.
Okay, this is this is where I want my business to be.
This is where I want my career to be.
If you're not like a business owner person, you know, this is this is where I want my income to be.
Get so clear.And then don't just like write like a million dollars like, “Oh, I want to make a million dollars.”
But why?
[00:11:30] Because what you might find is like a million dollars is actually far more than the life that you want or that you're budgeting for here.
I could get so clear and understand, like, why did you choose that?
Maybe it's 2 million, maybe it's five, maybe it's 10, maybe it's infinity.(But you can't set a GPS to infinity, so just start with a number, okay?)
Now that you're clear about that, you set the GPS.
And what you do is you start reverse engineering how you're going to get there.
[00:12:00] Hey, because every step that you take illuminates the path you won't know because you won't know what your holdups are going to be.
You won't know that.Okay, cool.
“I'm gonna start this new business. And when I do that, I'm gonna crush it.”Right?
“I'm gonna build a seven figure business.”
But maybe In order to build that seven figure business, because you can only see the next couple steps in front of you.
[00:12:30] Then you're just like, “Oh sh*t, I have to actually dial other businesses to try to get business? Oh sh*t. I don't know how to dial people. I don't know sales. I don't have the confidence to talk to people like that.”Then what do you have to do?
You have to work on your confidence.
You have to work on your sales.
You have to work on your marketing.
You have to work on what you do after they pick up.You have to like to build it all out.
And then you have to like, you have to be like, “Oh sh*t, like, this is actually going to be some work. It's not just a matter of like this vision of a business. I actually have to like to do work.”And again, people are going to break off because then you'll be like, “Well, that's a lot of work.”
[00:13:00] But the thing is, if you're willing to be like, “All right, cool. So I guess first thing that I can do is if I just want to take messy action, I guess I can go on Google because I can find the phone numbers for all of these local businesses or whatever that I can potentially serve. And obviously they're going to have a phone number there. I'll make a spreadsheet of all of those different companies with all of their different phone numbers, with all their social medias, with all of their emails, and I'm going to start outbounding. I don't know what the f*ck I'm going to say, but I'm just going to start.And then with every rejection that I face, I get to dial in my process a little bit more.”
I get to see like, “Ah, that sucked.”
And then maybe somebody like ripped me a new asshole.
And I'm just like, “Oh man, that was terrible. They ruined my whole day.”I let it ruin my whole day.
Then I know I have some personal development rejection stuff I got to work through.
You see what I'm saying?
And so by doing that, now we attack the weak points.
We work on our personal development.
We get more confident.
We start becoming more resilient to rejection.
[00:14:00] We start learning the sales process that we need to take.
And then boom, then we actually initiate a conversation where we feel more confident.
We take them through a process.
We qualify them.
We figure out what we need to do to take this into a deeper conversation, to see how we can help their business.Boom.
Next thing.
And then eventually that leads to a client.
And once you get that first client, then it's like, “Oh my gosh, all I had to do is put my head down, do the work.”
And that's the thing.
It's so simple.
But it's not easy, because of all of the different things.
[00:14:30] And as you enter this journey of like trying to change your life, different things will become road bumps, speed bumps, a brick wall, a f*cking mountain that you have to climb.
Like there's going to be something in front of you that you're going to have to overcome.
And that's why it feels like sometimes like, “Damn, like I just want to get the result.”But the result is on the other side of the work.
The result is on the other side of you becoming the version of you you're not yet.[00:15:00] And it's being able to be very intentional and knowing it's going to take work for you to become that person, to master that thing.
And when you can just bite the bullet and just be like, “I'm going to have to sacrifice my comfort. I'm going to have to sacrifice whatever the hell I think I know. I'm going to have to look dumb. I'm going to have to fail for - I'm just going to have to do whatever I need to do to win.”And when you become relentless, for some reason, the unlock happens.
For some reason, like you finally break through and you start seeing some results.
[00:15:30] It's not all of the results.
It's just some results.
And you're just like, “Okay, something - I don't know what's happening - something's happening.”And what's happening in that moment is you're starting to have fun with the work.
This is how you move through those times where you learn how to detach from that end result that you want so bad.
Like all you do is hold onto it, right?
It's like a GPS, okay?It's like you're driving in your car and you're looking at the GPS and all you're looking at is the end address.
[00:16:00] Imagine if you're just looking at the GPS and you're like, “I just can't wait to arrive.”
And then you miss every single turn that will help you get to that end address.
Will you ever get there?
Does that make sense?
Or are you like, “Okay, in 800 feet, I'm going to turn left. Okay. In 300 feet, I'm going to turn right. Okay. In like four miles, I'm going to go straight. Okay. I'm going to look out for that.”And then once you eventually get to the end destination.
That's what people got to understand.
Yes.[00:16:30] Can't be too worried about the end goal.
It doesn't matter about the results that you get throughout that.
It's about the incremental gains.It's getting closer and closer to the result because the thing is if you're too attached to that end result, if you're too attached to what you want, you're going to be distracted from the work that's required.
[00:17:00] And if you don't learn to have fun with the work, if you don't learn to have fun with the failures, with the rejection, with getting kicked in the f*cking teeth that it's going to take for you to create the life that you want, that you can be proud of, the door to mediocrity is right there.You can just settle for a boring, mediocre life.
You can settle for the relationship that doesn't even make you happy.
You can settle for a job that you get paid for, have security for, you don't really make a lot.
You work with people that hate their lives and you're just surrounded by them all the time.
You settle for a little sh*tty apartment because you can't afford the house that you want.
[00:17:30] Or you settle for a house that just makes you miserable, that doesn't even inspire you or motivate you.
The door is right there.
Guys, to have the life that you want.
You have to know that it's going to take work.
You have to be able to like stop for a second and just like really ask yourself like, “Damn, am I giving myself the proper expectations for this?”[00:18:00] If I really do want that life, if I really want to be that person that says like, “Oh my gosh, I worked my ass off for this. I earned this sh*t.”
Like what price did that person have to pay to be able to say that?
Are you willing to be that person?
Because if you are, then it doesn't matter about getting that end result right now.If you achieve that in your life, it's your life's work.
[00:18:30] When you think about it being your life's work and just getting there, and then realizing that all you have to do is be more present and start enjoying the process of living this life versus worrying so much about that end result, you'll actually get there faster.Okay, I'm gonna put one more visual in your mind.
We have two drivers, okay?
Driver number one, all he does.
He stares at that GPS, but he's zoomed in at the end result.
[00:19:00] Driver number two, okay, he's not zoomed in at the end result, he's already plugged in the GPS, he's looking at the turns.
In one day, let's say this is California to New York.In one day, they're both driving, one is looking at the end result, one is looking at the turns, only the very next turn that they can possibly take.
In one day, who's going to be closer to that end destination?
The person that's getting lost because they're not paying attention to the signs?[00:19:30] Or the person that's just like, ‘Okay, left turn, right turn, straight, go onto this freeway, exit, do this other thing.’
Who's actually getting closer to the end destination?
This person.
Are they focused on the same end result?
Yes.
Are they focused on the right things?
No.Yes.
End result turns.
[00:20:00] The only way for you to get closer to that end result that you want is by not focusing on it.
Get clear, understand the target, understand what you're aiming for, but don't waste your days.Focus on something you can't control.
Focus on right now.
Focus on today.
Focus on what you can control and understand that if you're comfortable, then you're not doing what you need to do because It's a very scary thing to start going in a different direction and creating the life that you want, that you can be proud of.It's a scary thing.
[00:20:30] And, and the thing is like in life, like people are so like, “Oh, it's so amazing. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.”“It's f*cking motivational.”
“It's so easy. Just do the work.”
Blah, blah, blah.
But like, no, no, no, it's, it's hard.
You're going to get kicked in the face.
It's going to try and test you on a daily basis.
There's going to be some days where you're like, “No, I'm gonna crush this. I'm ready to fail. I'm in it to win it.”
[00:21:00] And the very next f*cking hour, you're like, “Jesus Christ. Ah, was this the right decision? Should I keep doing this? Damn it.”
And then again, you wake up the next day and you're like, “I'm gonna crush this.”
Get kicked in the teeth again.
And you're just like, “Jesus, man, I don't even - ah, it's only been two days. And every day it's like that cycle.”
And for some reason you just focus on the, “Okay, I'm gonna get hit in the face again. I'm gonna get hit in the face again.”
[00:21:30] And then one day you look up and you're just like, “Oh sh*t, my whole life has changed. I'm still getting kicked in the teeth, but like my whole life has changed. I don't even know how I'm doing it, but I'm just doing my best, every day.”
When you can just do your best every day, you win.
When you can just be very intentional with just doing your best, it's very hard to receive this when you don't have faith in yourself, or you don't have faith in the path.But when you just believe in yourself, there's a beautiful thing that happens.
[00:22:00] Where it's like you kind of just like let go and let God.
And you're just like, “Well sh*t, I pray, I meditate, I do whatever I gotta do, something's telling me and leading me on this path, I'm just gonna get after it, I'm just gonna follow the breadcrumbs, I'm not gonna focus on the end result, cause that's never served me, I'm just gonna focus on the next step, the next step, the next step, and I'm just gonna follow these breadcrumbs, and I'm gonna trust that every single day, as long as I follow my battle plan, that I'm gonna be good to go. Because my track record states that I've gotten myself to this point in life. I can get myself to the next point and the next destination after that. And I just keep pushing. I don't know how I'm going to do it, but I'm going to do it.”
[00:22:30] And I want you to understand that the most successful people in the world, understand that when we set targets most of the time, if not all of the time, we don't know how the f*ck we're getting there.
But we do understand and have confidence that we will.
[00:23:00] It doesn't matter how long it takes.
Once we've decided that we're going to get there, we're going to get there.
And we can work with people to help us get there a little bit faster by bridging some of the gaps in our operating system, or we can choose to be a lone wolf and do it on our own and just take the next decade, two or three.But as long as we choose to get there, we will get there.
Just make sure that - and I'll leave you with this.
Just make sure that as you enter this journey of changing your life.
[00:23:30] And you learn how to detach yourself from the end result and learn delayed gratification.
That you supplement how you experience this journey by not doing sh*t that doesn't serve you.Getting drunk all the time, smoking weed all the time.
Just not working out, getting fat, getting a dad bod like I did, don't do that sh*t.
Cause then it makes you sluggish.
The weed makes you anxious.
The drinking makes you just like a terrible human.
[00:24:00] And if you do that, what happens is it elongates the time that it takes for you to make these big realizations.But when you're like clear in the mind, and you know that you don't have these vices that are taking from you, you can actually have so much more clarity faster.
So that way you can make the turns because again, disoriented, you're not making those turns.You're seeing the signs late.
And when you do that opportunity passes by.So you want to make sure you're clear of all of those things, okay?
[00:24:30] Stay active.
Be straight edge.
Do what you gotta do.
You don't need to drink.
You don't need to smoke.
You don't need to do none of that.
You don't need the Carl's Jr. Double Western Bacon Cheeseburger.
You don't need any of that stuff.
Eat right.Track your macros.
Be who you need to be to win at this game.
And when you do that, you will start feeling connected to life at a deeper level.
Meditate.
Pray.
Do whatever you gotta do.
Whatever you believe in.
Learn how to be more present in your life.
And this is how you keep going.
[00:25:00] This is the truth.Whether you wanna hear it or not.
This is how you keep going.
There's no other secret sauce.
There's no other strategy, another map that I'm hiding from you.
The only way I've been able to get to this point in my life from where I was, and you can do your research and find out where I came from, is just not stopping.
It's just to take it a day at a time, take it a step at a time, and to just keep going.
[00:25:30] If you can just make that happen for yourself, and just keep going, especially on the days where you don't want to show up, wake up early on the days you don't want to wake up, don't hit that snooze button, go to the gym when you don't want to, especially when it's raining and cold.Eat right, even though you just see the donuts your wife just bought again and you want to just get a burger and just eat your feelings away because of all the stress.
Don't do it.
Choose the path that will serve you.
[00:26:00] And every day you're gonna feel like you're stripping away this old self and that you're actually inviting in the new self, the higher self, the version of you that actually serves you.
Alright, just remember, you got this.
And if you ever need more support, you just watch and listen to all of my other content because there's a different things that maybe you're even unaware of that's preventing you from becoming who you need to be.And the whole purpose of everything that I do here is to show you all of the things that I've had to change within myself to become who I am today.
[00:26:30] And I'm going to continue to document all the things that I changed throughout time.
So that way you can see how high somebody can go when they just don't break those promises to themselves.
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:27:00]
-
In this episode, Phil emphasizes the power of community. He says that being the dumbest (least experienced) person in a room full of more accomplished individuals is a good thing, as it pushes you to learn and grow. Phil shares personal experiences, including his military background, to highlight the value of facing challenges with a supportive group rather than alone. He criticizes the idea of solitary success and encourages us to form or join communities of like-minded individuals who are committed to growth and improvement. Phil insists that surrounding yourself with people who are more successful or knowledgeable in various aspects of life can significantly accelerate your personal and professional development.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:14) - Going Solo Isn't the Only Way
(03:14) - The Accelerating Power of Community
(06:56) - How Shared Wisdom Makes Problems 'Too Easy'
(08:43) - Surround Yourself with Giants
(11:03) - The Reality Check of Expanding Your Network
(13:30) - How To Fast-Track Your Growth
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Transcription:
[00:00:00] You want to be the dumbest person in the room, you want to be the person that's like the smallest, the lowest earner in the f*cking room.
You can be in a room with like 7 figure earners, and you think you're hot sh*t, and everybody's an 8 figure earner, 9 figures, Jesus.
And you're just like, “Oh sh*t, I don't know sh*t, I thought I knew sh*t. In comparison to like the six figure earners, I thought I knew sh*t.”
If you're a six figure earner, and you go in a room with a full of five figure earners, you're gonna be like, “Damn, I thought I was the sh*t. I make the most here.”
And then to them, they're making more money than the part timers.
[00:00:30] Part timers are making more money than people that don't got jobs.Everybody is the top of their game until they're not, until you enter the next room, until you get to the next level.
[00:01:00] What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol, and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
I don't know why so many people think that they have to go through this life alone.
And I get it.
You got pride, you got ego, you have things telling you that you got this.
But like, why does that have to be normal?
[00:01:30] Why does that have to be the way that you live?
I remember when I was really coming out, when I was on my own.10 years old, family split apart, started going on our separate ways, parents did stupid sh*t.
And I was always looking for that, that pack. I was always looking for that tribe.
So many different companies that I've tried to start at the beginning of my journey, many years ago, had to do with a pack had to do with the tribe had to do with wolves and the pack mentality and all of these things.[00:02:00] And every time I had friends, I had associates, people, I'd always try to bring everybody together.
And for some reason, people really do believe that you have to go through this life on your own, but why?
Why do you feel like you have to go through this life alone?
I don't give a sh*t where you're at, what level you're at.Life is so much more fun when you have cool people to do cool sh*t with.
Especially when they're on the same wavelength as you.
[00:02:30] Now I'm not talking about doing life with people that say, “Hey, let's go f*cking smoke weed. Let's go drink. Let's go party all the time. Waste our time. Let's not do anything productive with our time.”I'm not talking about those people.
I'm not talking about doing life with those people.
I'm talking about doing life with people who want to grow, want to evolve, that want to see what they're made of in this world, to see what type of change can they create in their own lives, in the world, for other people.[00:03:00] When you surround yourself with people who just have this mentality of truly wanting to self actualize, truly wanting to see what they can accomplish in this one life they have to live, why would you want to just do that on your own?
It's such a lonely path.
And I think so many people have success all types of screwed up where they think that they have to like climb this mountain on their own.And I've done it both ways.
I've gone the route where it's just like me and myself and I'm just gonna keep trudging along.
And I've done it where I've been part of a pack.
And 10 times I'd rather do it with a pack.
You still can achieve success 100%.
[00:03:30] But there's kind of no point.
You actually accelerate growth when you grow with other people.It's one of the reasons why I built my tribe.
I built my community because I knew that life alone is so much harder because what happens is when you're on your own, when you're out in the world by yourself and you have no community, you have no people, you don't have a tribe of people on the same path as you.It's a lonely path.
It's a dark path.
And you're more likely to go into these like negative mental states.
[00:04:00] When I was in the military, one of the biggest things I always felt grateful for was having my brothers.
Always having people who understood what it meant to really embrace the suck together.
To know that, as I suffer, I know that, like, all of these other men are suffering too.And that suffering is what brought us together.
And so what happens in this life, civilian life, people don't feel that way.
[00:04:30] People are like, have so much ego and pride that they think that they have to go after things alone, but it's like, no, when you're a unit, when, when you have people, when you guys are like attacking a problem together, it's so much more fun.And I don't know why people don't want to have fun in life.
I think that people really do choose to live a miserable life.
[00:05:00] Because if you were to drop all the bullsh*t that doesn't serve you, the ego, the pride, the vices, everything, the anger, the wrath, the spite, the sloth, the lust, all of it, you drop all of it, and you're just like a student to this game of life again, and you just absorb everything that life has to offer, you're still going to have to suffer.You're still going to have to go through the hard times.
You're still going to go through the darkness.
You don't have to go about it alone.
Think about, like, Lord of the Rings, okay?
I don't even remember what the f*ck their names were.
But there's a f*cking little guy that had a ring, and he had to go f*cking do something with it.[00:05:30] Imagine if that whole movie was just him, by himself.
How boring would that whole f*cking saga, or whatever that's called, how boring would it be?
What made it interesting was all the sh*t that happened with all the other people that he surrounded himself with, all the different scenarios.
But what happened by the end of it is, I think, they crushed it.I don't know how many more movies they made, but they crushed it.
They crushed their goal together.
They solved the problems together.
[00:06:00] They accomplished the same mission from the different backgrounds they came from all together, and that's what made it easy to win.
When I say easy, I don't mean that the path to winning was easy.It was easy because they couldn't give up on themselves because they had other people they held themselves accountable to.
They had other people inspiring them to move forward.
And there's gonna be some stupid f*cks that say, “Hey, no, that means you're weak, that means you can't do it on your own.”Blah, blah, blah.
I've done it on my own, and I've done it with a pack.
You can be strong enough to do it on your own.
[00:06:30] And you can choose to enjoy the process with a pack, it doesn't, it doesn't take away.
It's like anytime you guys hear that, I want you to understand those are the smallest people that say sh*t like that because they don't get it.That's why they're losing.
There's no winner.
That's ever going to say, yeah, just do it on your own.
I think about the most successful people.
They're always surrounded by other people, their tribe, their community.
There are people who are winning with them.
Why do you think like everybody has their people?[00:07:00] There's so many times, guys, where you're gonna go and try to change your life, and you're gonna fail.
You're gonna go, you try to change your life, you're gonna fail.
You're gonna go, you're gonna try to change your body, you go to the gym, you fail.
You're gonna go try to start a business, and you're gonna fail.You're gonna go try to level up in your career, you're gonna fail.
What happens, though, when you have people that, like, pick you up when you're down?
[00:07:30] What happens, though, when you are, like, trying to come up with all the excuses why you should give up, and you have that one hard motherf*cker that's like, “Hey, stop being a bitch. Just f*cking do what you gotta do. Just keep pushing.”
What happens when you have that one person that kicks you in the f*cking teeth when you need it?
Not out of like hate.
But out of like, wake the f*ck up, you're worth more than this bullsh*t that you're doing right now, stop doing this sh*t.
What happens when you have that person that gives you the space that you need just to break down, cause that's what you need right now.Doesn't it give you more permission to just be whoever you need to be in that moment?
So that way you can dust yourself off and pick yourself back up and start moving again?
[00:08:00] That's what it means to have that level of support.
And I think people are just, it's too much.
People would rather like operate from a place of ego and pride, and like lose, for life, than to run with a pack of wolves.It's so dumb to me.
It really is so dumb to me because you have a track record of just failing yourself all the time.
[00:08:30] So why, why, why do you believe that you're going to be able to get yourself through the hard times faster than being surrounded with people from all different levels?
People that have like way outperformed you, where if you bring your problem to the table, it's like it's nothing.That's too easy.
It's literally too easy to solve that problem.
Imagine if you're surrounded by people like that who are just like, no, it's f*cking too easy.But what happens is I think people get lost in the sauce and they think that it would, it would make them look dumb to be in that position, to not be the smartest person in the room.
Guys, please, please be the dumbest person in the room.
[00:09:00] The one thing that has always served me was making sure that I put myself in social environments and situations where like I wasn't the top guy.
I've been the top guy in rooms and Jesus Christ.
How f*cking boring.
Like, when you go into those rooms, everybody just wants to talk to you, and everybody just wants from you.And it's great, you know, you can give, and you can help them, and blah blah blah blah blah, and it's cool.
But when you're on this journey and season of growth, you want to be the dumbest person in the room.
[00:09:30] You want to be the person that's like the smallest, the lowest earner in the f*cking room.You can be in a room with like seven figure earners, and you think you're hot sh*t, and everybody's an eight figure earner, nine figures.
Jesus.And you're just like, “Oh, sh*t. I don't know sh*t. I thought I knew sh*t in comparison to like the six figure earners. I thought I knew sh*t.”
If you're a six figure earner and you go in a room with a full of five figure earners, you're gonna be like, “Damn, I thought I was the sh*t.”
I make the most here.
And then to them, they're making more money than the part timers part timers are making more money than people that don't got jobs.
[00:10:00] Everybody is the top of their game until they're not until you enter the next room, until you get to the next level.But just imagine what would happen to your ability to rise to the next level.
[00:10:30] If you did it with a group of people, where everybody grows at different levels, at different speeds, in different areas of life, in different areas of business, and like you just mastermind all the time, and you, you probably know people you can do this with right now, go f*cking do it, go do it, ask them, invite them, even if it's just two of you, three of you, get people that you know are like, pushing to win in life, and like, create a community, a tribe, even if it's just two or three of you.
Weekly, mastermind with each other.
See, like, what went well, what didn't go well.
What's all of this sh*t that they're working on?
What are you working on?
[00:11:00] Put value into the pot.
Teach each other.
Why is it, why do I have to even teach this to you guys?
It's crazy to me that, like, this doesn't naturally register.You guys wanna know how I built my network?
Of, of millionaires?
Sh*t like this.
Literally just wanting to give value to everybody all the time.
Literally, like, not wanting to do anything but to grow.
Wanting to contribute.
[00:11:30] Wanting to have a reason to do what the f*ck I'm doing.
And because of that, people always saw me as that helpful guy.The guy that always wanted to solve problems.
The guy that's always in I'm always down to do whatever the f*ck we need to do.
And you think that there's something special about what I do?
There's nothing special.
I just do the things that are valuable.
All the time.
That's how I spend my time.[00:12:00] You guys get too f*cking complacent being okay with the people you've been surrounding yourself with that don't serve you, that aren't in it for growth, that aren't trying to change their life.
They're just like, good, we'll just play lottery tickets all day.
We'll just drink all the time, we'll just smoke all the time.
We won't even level up or push ourselves all the time.
Or maybe you are the top of the pack right now.
Like, you're gonna let it get to your head so much that like you're the top of your game and you're just like, “Yeah, I'm f*cking crushing like six figures. I'm like crushing it.”
And then you come up to somebody that's like, I make that in a month, like the f*ck are you talking about, you're crushing it?
[00:12:30] It takes you a year to make six figures?
The f*ck is that?
Imagine what's going to happen to your paradigm.
You'd be like, “Oh sh*t, I didn't know people can make that amount of money and I'm f*cking month.”But then when you get into a room of people that I can actually make seven figures in a year and more.
Then you're not that hot sh*t.
[00:13:00] But imagine if it took you a decade to realize that there's bigger rooms out there and that you're not hot sh*t and you're not the biggest, baddest motherf*cker, because you're just used to your social circle right now.And then when you get to the top of your social circle, what happens?
You start leading the social circle.
And again, you're back on your own.
Nobody's challenging you.
Nobody's holding you accountable.
You're not seeing what's possible.
You don't see anybody else winning because you're surrounding yourself.If you're a 10, you're surrounding yourselves with 3s and 4s.
Because those people are never going to level up.
You know that.
I know that.
Don't go after this life and wanting to succeed in this life on your own.If you want to really crush it in life and like, collapse the amount of time that it takes for you to get to the level that you're really going to be proud of yourself, you gotta run with a pack of wolves.
You gotta run with a tribe, you have to run with a community, a good community of people that you know hustle, that you know outperform themselves, that you know will never settle for the life that they have because they know that they have the potential to reach greater heights.[00:14:00] Stop listening to the sheep of the world and getting lost because that's time you're never going to get back.
And if you can only see what I see.
Cause when I talk to my clients, I'm like, “Damn. Do you not see what I see in you? You could be, you can have, you can do so much more than you even realize. You can be, you can have, you can do so much more than you even think you're capable of.”[00:14:30] And even by just listening to this, I hope you really do take me seriously.
I hope you end this and you're just like, “Damn, like, do, am I, can I, I mean, may, I don't know, maybe.”
[00:15:00] Even just that's life changing because the moment it enters your mind that it's possible whether you take action on it now or wait a month, wait a year, wait 10, it's going to constantly be on your mind to see what you're capable of to see if that thought can actually be a reality and that is life changing when you decide, “I'm not going to wait 10 years. I'm not going to wait one year. I don't even want to wait a month. I want to see, like, if Phil said that this is possible for little old me, and all I have to do is get into bigger rooms and start doing things that are scary to me, I guess I'm going to see what happens.”
And you just see what happens.You just see where that f*cking road takes you.
[00:15:30] My god, in 365 days, you're going to be so surprised about how you got to where you got to.
That your entire life changed because you changed up here, you decided to believe in you, you decided to go all in on you, you decided to run with a pack of wolves, that will call you to the next level, that will keep running.
When you think you're tired and you see them, you're just like, “Jesus. They don't even look tired.”
And it inspires you.
Wait for that time.
[00:16:00] And it's again, your choice.
You can either wait a day, you can wait a week, you can wait a month, you can wait a year.
It's up to you at the end of the day how long and how much time you want to waste until you actually see what you're capable of.
You can do it on your own, or you can plug into a tribe.
Find your tribe, plug in, believe in you, you got this.
That's the show.
[00:16:30] Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
-
In this episode, Phil dives into the importance of seizing life's opportunities and overcoming the fear of failure. He emphasizes that life is fleeting and urges listeners to not waste time worrying about others' opinions. Drawing from personal experiences, Phil encourages embracing change, whether it’s starting or pivoting in business, or striving for personal improvement. He shares his journey from struggling in school and the military to achieving success by being unafraid to fail and constantly learning. Phil's message is to make bold choices, ignore naysayers, and relentlessly pursue your goals to live a fulfilling life. This episode is a call to action for anyone feeling stuck or afraid to take their next step in life.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:02) - Making Every Second Count
(04:12) - Overcoming Inexperience with Grit and Determination
(10:51) - Escaping the Grip of Pointless Resentment
(12:27) - Pivoting Is Important For Progress
(15:03) - Regret-Proofing Your Life
(19:44) - Taking Charge of Your Life
(21:32) - Transform Your Tomorrow
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Transcription:
[00:00:00] There's so many people in this world that are just so lost.
I look at them in the f*cking eyes and I'm just like, “Damn, motherf*cker. Are you even in there? Like, do you even feel connected to life? Do you even feel like, like you're here? Like what the f*ck's going on? You're like a f*cking zombie.I want you guys to remember that, like, f*ck, life is so precious.
Every second is fleeting.
Every moment right now, every second that passes, we don't get back.
[00:00:30] What's going on, you guys?
It's Phil Bohol, and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:01:00] You guys, you guys cannot be afraid to make f*cking pivots in your life, okay?
Especially if you guys got businesses, please.
Stop being so afraid of what other people might think because of the sh*t that you have to do.
You gotta get sh*t done.
You got a family that's waiting for you to be successful.
You got you that has the one life you have to live.[00:01:30] You ever see that f*cking Justin Timberlake movie where it's like they got like the time they have left in their life?
It's like here and it's like counting down your seconds pass and you never get those seconds back.
Why are you so afraid to take that leap of faith into yourself?
Launched that f*cking business.Launched a second business.
Launched a tenth one after the first nine failed.
Why are you so afraid of failing again?
[00:02:00] Why are you so afraid that you launched a business, it didn't really pan out the way that you wanted, and like you went kind of all into it, and it's time to pivot, but like you're afraid what your mom or dad or wife or husband or whoever the f*ck What they're gonna think about that?You think you got time to worry about that sh*t?
No, please, please, Jesus Christ.
[00:02:30] If you are so concerned about other people, you're never gonna be able to change your life.
If you're more concerned about what other people are gonna think about you versus you just f*cking doing you, you gotta understand you're the only person that's gonna have to deal with that sh*t at the end of your life.[00:03:00] You're the only person that's gonna regret that by the time you're 70, 80, 90, I don't know how f*ck old we're gonna get, you look back on your life and you're like, “Damn, I really just spent f*cking years during that period of my life.”
So concerned about f*cking Bob, Jill, Karen, Ben (need to come up with better names).
F*cking all of these people who mean nothing.They haven't talked to you in like three decades.
You were so concerned about those f*ckers, that you didn't do the things.
You didn't keep making power moves after power moves after power moves because you were just afraid of how it would look to the world?You gotta understand, like, f*ck the world.
F*ck what people think.
F*ck everybody's opinion.
And like, I mean that with all due respect.
F*ck them.
[00:03:30] Because what happens?
You're valuing somebody else, their words, their opinions, all of these things, their f*cking life, more than you value your own life.
And look, I get it, it's a scary thing.I get that becoming the best version of yourself, the most successful version of yourself, is going to require you to put down the f*cking ego and the pride and be like, “This sh*t does not serve me.”
[00:04:00] And I just need to keep going all in, all in, all in, all the time, especially if you got a family, especially if you got kids, especially if you got people counting on you.You don't got time to be wasting, worried about how people are going to perceive the moves that you're making.
One of the biggest things that I've always done, and I say this all the time, and this might not be the first time you've ever heard me say it.
[00:04:30] The only reason I won, the only reason why I got to break through, from the dumbass life I was living was because I was willing to do what everybody else was not willing to do.I was willing to fail far more than anybody else was willing to fail.
I was willing to look stupid for far longer and on multiple occasions more than anybody else.
When I first started online, this was 2019.
You can, you can go on my f*cking Facebook, you can go find my sh*t.
I was reading a book.[00:05:00] Literally reading a f*cking book and then saying, “Hmm, here's what I think about that.”
Because I didn't know what the f*ck to talk about.
I wasn't good enough to talk like this.
Again, everything that you see, everything that you hear, that's been forged and built over time.
But I started the same place you're starting.But instead of me saying, “Hey, I don't know how to do this online thing. I don't know how to do business stuff. I don't know how to be a founder. I don't know how to be a CEO.”
And then just sit there with my f*cking balls in my hand.
[00:05:30] Just like, “Oh, I don't know what the f*ck to do.”I just decided to pick up a f*cking random book and then just start reading because I was like, “I don't know if this is going to be valuable to anybody, but I think that the one way that I'm going to win in life is being the most valuable person. So maybe if I read this f*cking book and like I explain how I perceive the book, maybe that's valuable to somebody else.”
And I did that sh*t for hours.
And then, and then nothing happened.
[00:06:00] But those were stepping stones to my success because then when it came to like, like taking on clients, when it came to doing my first virtual event in front of like, what was it, 40, 50 people?And I've never done a virtual event.
I've never been in front of people like that before.
I've never had that many people pay me admission to listen to me f*cking talk for 5 days straight.
And I just like, jumped in and I was like, I don't even f*cking know what I'm doing but, here I am.
[00:06:30] I even told them, at the start of the event, ‘Guys, this is my first ever event ever. So if I f*ck up, sorry, I'm not like, trained for this sh*t.’And you know what?
They didn't say, “Oh you f*cking suck, give me a refund. Oh blah blah blah blah blah, this is bullsh*t. You're not Tony Robbins. What the f*ck?”They didn't say that.
They said, “No bro, you got this bro.”
Like the people that paid me money were like rooting for me to give them value like what the f*ck was that about?It's just because I was being real.
[00:07:00] I was like, ‘I don't know what the f*ck I'm doing. I'm doing the best that I can and I know that other people aren't willing to do this sh*t. But I want to share with you exactly what worked for me because for some reason I started crushing it in the online space. So I just wanted to teach people that sh*t.’You see what I'm saying?
All you have to do is just do what you got to do.
Do not be the one that months or years, please do not let it be years pass by before you like really find out what you're made of, you know?[00:07:30] There's so many people that you know, cuz again at right now I'm 30 years old at 30 years old I got the house that my kids can just like run around in like for f*cking days.
My daughter has all these different cars.She has more cars than me.
F*ck.She can just do whatever.
My wife?
She has her own office.
I have this massive f*cking office.
We have the perfect life.
She can have whatever she wants whenever she wants.
I retired her f*ckin three, four years ago?
She hasn't had to work.
[00:08:00] If she wants to work, she can, but she hasn't had to.I have a Lamborghini at 30 years old.
The f*ck's that about?
I got two amazing kids.
I got a beautiful wife.
How?
How did I do that?
I'm not special.
So, in high school, here's how not special I am.
I went to, like, freshman year, I went to sophomore year, and then I started dwindling away in sophomore year.Didn't go to junior year.
[00:08:30] I was non-existent senior year.
People didn't even know I went to that f*cking high school.
I somehow made it to prom, and people like almost voted me prom king or some sh*t, even though I never went to school.
And I had f*cking hater teachers that didn't want me to go because they're like, you don't deserve this sh*t.I didn't.
I tried to go to college and I went on campus.
I was like, “This is so f*cking confusing. I don't even know where the f*ck to go. I don't even know where the office is. F*ck this.”So I'd rather go to the military.
[00:09:00] And I chose to be a machine gunner.
You know what they call machine gunners?
Machine dumbers.You know why?
Because all we gotta do is be f*cking strong, and then f*cking pull a trigger.
That's literally it.
(And then, you know, there's obviously a lot of sh*t involved with that. Like, don't get me wrong, don't be dumb. If you've never been a machine gunner, don't be a f*cking idiot and comment on sh*t you don't understand.)But you see what I'm saying, though?
I'm not, like, the smartest dude ever.
I have tons of books in my office.
I Google a lot of sh*t.
[00:09:30] YouTube.
I like deconstructed my old cars when I used to work on my cars, f*cking Googled and YouTubed how to disassemble a f*cking engine.
You see it?Like just get resourceful, fail, focus so much on wanting to win in your life that you just don't give a f*ck.
You guys worry too much about people's opinions and you say you don't, but like, if you don't, why don't you try?
[00:10:00] Why don't you do your best?
Why don't you try something different?
Why don't you allow yourself to look dumb or to fail?
If you got a nine to five right now, why don't you go after the supervisor role?Why don't you go after management?
Why don't you go after something bigger?
Why don't you ask for a f*cking raise?
If you're past that point and you're making good money and you're like, I want to do something for myself.
Why don't you go do something for yourself?
Why don't you launch that first business idea?Why don't you launch the second one, the third one?
Why don't you f*cking pivot?
[00:10:30] The moment you realize that it's probably not gonna go well if I keep going this f*cking direction.
Why don't you just f*cking pivot right now?
What are you so worried about?
Are you worried that your wife is gonna be like, ‘Yo, motherf*cker, like, you're - what's happening here? You just said you're gonna do this thing, and now you're doing the other thing, and now we're gonna do this other thing.’And blah blah.
Like, what are you worried about?
You can't waste your time worried about opinions that, they're not even f*cking permanent.
You have to remember, like, it's okay.It's like when somebody cuts you off.
You're on the f*cking freeway, somebody cuts you off.
You know what happens if you choose to get mad?
You're driving, somebody cuts you off, and you're like, “What the f*ck?”You know what happens when they speed off?
They don't even realize they cut you off.
They don't think twice about you.Literally no part of their day is more ruined than it already is.
They f*cking forgot about you literally the moment they cut you off because they didn't probably realize they did it.
[00:11:30] What happens in this car though, where you're in?
You choose in that moment that this bastard of a f*cker, bastard of a f*cker, cut you off.And like, they did it intentionally, they're trying to get you.
They wanna f*cking ruin your day.Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and then what happens?
You hold on to that anger, and now you're driving and sh*t, all angry, and you're the only person that's angry about the situation.
You're the only person that won't let it go.
So what happens?[00:12:00] You take that throughout the rest of your f*cking day, and the rest of your week, and you're like, “Yeah, this f*cking motherf*cker cut me off the other day.”
And it's like, motherf*cker, that was the other day.
Why are you still talking about that?
You guys realize that the reason why I have wrath, right here, as the, my deadliest sin?
It's because I used to be like you.
I used to be worried about that sh*t.
But like, what's the point?
It's a waste.
You gotta learn how to let sh*t go.
[00:12:30] So when it comes to like, making power moves in your life, you gotta let go of all the sh*t that's holding you back.Because at the end of the day, when it's just you versus you, you're gonna realize, you're the only person holding you back, like there's literally nobody else.
If you're just like, “Well f*ck, I'm not good at speaking on stage.”If you tell yourself that, then you're not.
If you tell yourself that, “Oh f*ck dude, like, I don't know if it's the right call, I don't wanna make the wrong call, so I'm not gonna make a call.”[00:13:00] You know how much, like, lack of confidence you're gonna have in yourself?
You know that making a call, even if it's the wrong call, sometimes it's good, because then you learn all the ways not to do sh*t?
You do realize that, right?
When you're like, “Oh f*ck, like, you know, I told my wife, I told my friend, I told these people that I was going to make this move, and they f*cking - they looked at me all funny. And I was like, ‘Ah, maybe I shouldn't do it.’”You do realize what happens in that moment, right?
[00:13:30] You do realize, you devalue yourself, and you value other people, put them on a f*cking pedestal.
No wonder you lack confidence in yourself.
No wonder you don't believe in yourself.
No wonder you don't go all in on yourself.
Because you just don't value you.You're worried too much about everybody else.
But like, what about you?
Where are you in this equation?
Why aren't you like, “No, I want to prove myself right? I wanna prove to myself that I can do whatever the f*ck I say I'm gonna do. Even if I f*cking fail. I have all of the intel that I need to keep making the right moves.”This is like a f*cking chess game.
[00:14:00] Don't be concerned about making moves, about pivoting, about doing what you need to do for your life, for your business, in every f*cking area.
If you got a business, make the f*cking pivot.
Make the move.
Do the thing.
Go all in on yourself, please.
If you're dieting and you're trying to get your body right, and like, you're not dropping the fat, don't just keep doing the same sh*t.Adjust your macros.
Like, be like, “Okay, cool, this wasn't working.”[00:14:30] Adjust.
And then you adjust and adjust and adjust until you're on target.
Fitness is the same thing.
If your sh*t's f*cked up, or like, you're hurting yourself, maybe you'd be like, “Maybe I shouldn't do that workout like that. Because every week I injure myself.”You know how dumb it would be for you to start getting f*cking injured, and then you're like, “I'm going to do the same exact workouts, the same things that always hurt me.”
You know how stupid that sounds versus like doing a different modified workout?
[00:15:00] Learn how to pivot, learn how to adjust, learn how not to give a f*ck.
Man, like too many people give a f*ck about too many things that are so irrelevant that they forget to live.
They forget to experience life.
Life is about failures.
Life is about experiencing what's good, what's bad, what works, what doesn't work.
That's kind of the point, guys.
It's kind of the point for us to like, experience that for ourselves.[00:15:30] Like, don't wait for somebody to be like, “Hey, that's no, no, no, no, don't go that f*cking way. Oh, you should go that way. Oh, you should do this thing.”
Like, stop waiting for permission from people.
Give yourself permission to go do the damn thing.
Like, live your f*cking life.
The good, the bad, the ugly, the happy, the sad.All of it.
Obviously, make the right choices, the best that you possibly can, but like, make a f*cking choice.
Stop waiting for somebody to make that choice for you.
Stop waiting for somebody to live for you.
Jesus.
[00:16:00] Man, like, there's so many people in this world that are just so lost.
I look at them in the f*cking eyes and I'm just like, “Damn, motherf*cker, are you even in there? Like, do you even feel connected to life? Do you even feel like, like you're here? Like, what the f*ck's going on? You're like a f*cking zombie.”
I want you guys to remember that life is so precious.Every second is fleeting.
Every moment right now, every second that passes, we don't get back.You gotta remember that.
[00:16:30] You gotta make the moves.
You gotta do what you've been scared to do.
You gotta be willing to f*cking fail and just know, you got the rest of your life to sort that sh*t out.
I'm not talking about f*cking doing crack.
Drop the f*cking alcohol, drop the drugs, drop all the stupid sh*t, drop the fast food eating bullsh*t, all of it, drop it.Create some macros for yourself, work out, build a business for yourself to build for the rest of your life.
[00:17:00] Challenge yourself in those areas.
Be the best version of you every single f*cking day.
And fail.
Don't have so much f*cking pride that you like, you don't want to look like the guy that didn't know the answer.So when you do that, you like, hold yourself back from being a student again to the game of life.
And, and when you stop being that student of this game of life, you miss out on life.
You miss out on what life has to offer you.
[00:17:30] And like, what are you - what is it gonna take?
You know, the only reason why most people make a change in their life is because something bad happens.I mean, f*ck, it happened to me, you know?
Major car accident and sh*t.
Then I was like, okay, I gotta change my life.
Why do we have to wait till those moments?
Why do we have to wait till that time to start, like, actually making these big decisions that we actually commit to?
Why the f*ck, why does that have to happen that way?[00:18:00] Why can't you hear something like this and be like, “Damn, I should really, like, take some time to reflect on this sh*t. Like, f*ck, maybe, maybe there's something I should be doing. Maybe there is something I gotta stop. Maybe I really do gotta drop the drinking. Maybe I do gotta drop the drugs. F*ck, maybe I do gotta launch that business. F*ck, maybe I do gotta pivot. F*ck, maybe I was overconfident. F*ck, maybe I didn't know what I was doing. F*ck, maybe I should f*cking read a book. F*ck, maybe I should stop reading so damn much because I'm just distracting myself from doing the work. Jesus Christ, maybe I should say sorry to my wife for, I don't know, eating her last meal.”
I don't f*cking know.
I don't f*ck with my wife.
You know?Like have a hard look at your life and like be like, “Damn I really do got to start making some of those changes.”
[00:19:00] Because the longer you spend not making those decisions, not pivoting, not doing the things that you know you should, the things that scare you the most, the things that are like causing you to distract yourself over here, when you know you kind of got to be over here.
Those are the things that are gonna prevent you from living your life experiencing your life Being present in the now.
And man, I would hate, hate, hate, hate for you to arrive at a later point in your life.
And like, you lost a decade.
[00:19:30] You lost so much time where you could have been happy.
But you chose to operate from a place of fear rather than from a place of power.And I don't want that for you.
You might be like, “Well, Phil, how the f*ck, how do you know you don't want that for me, bro?”Like, I don't want that for anybody.
You gotta remember, I've been through quite a lot in my life.
To the point where I wanted to take my life.
[00:20:00] I've known my marines, my people, who've taken their lives.Because they lost their battles. Because they didn't understand the point anymore.
I'm not saying that's where you're at or where you're going.
But I do know how lost we can get.
So do the thing that scares you.
Go all in on yourself.
Run the business.
Make the pivot.
Look f*cking foolish.
[00:20:30] Put your f*cking heart and soul into your life.
Otherwise what's the point?
What's the point of all of this if you're not gonna do that for you?But man, when you start, when you actually go all in on.
[00:21:00] Your like, “Alright, I f*cking got this, like, I'm gonna square my sh*t away. I'm gonna get a solid haircut, drop the liquor, drop the drugs, drop the fat, f*cking stop door dashing all my sh*t, start reading books, waking up early, f*cking I'm gonna command and control my f*cking life.
Just run it for 30 days.
Just see what happens in 30 days.
Make the f*cking power moves in your business.
F*cking pivot.
Do whatever you got to do.
Watch what happens in 30 days.
Commit to it.
Go on.
Every single day you wake up to win the battle.
You wake up for something.
You wake up to prove to yourself that you can win today.
[00:21:30] That's what life's all about.Don't go to sleep tonight and do nothing with this.
As you lay in bed, wherever the f*ck you sleep, why don't you start asking yourself, what are these decisions you gotta be making?
What are those pivots?
Where can you go all in on yourself and your business?
[00:22:00] And your health and your nutrition and your fitness?And then, make a promise to yourself.
If you gotta write it on a f*cking piece of paper, sign and date it, do what you gotta do.
But don't go to sleep tonight until you make that promise to yourself.
[00:22:30] And I can guaran-f*cking-tee you tomorrow, when that alarm goes off because you decided you wanted to wake up at 5am, 6am, whatever the f*ck, an hour earlier than you normally do (you don't gotta do the 3 like me, but let's say that you do) you're gonna feel tired, but god damn you're gonna feel alive.You're gonna feel like there's some point of living again, just from one simple act.
If you don't believe me, try it tonight.
If you really want to prove me wrong, try it once tonight, go all in, don't half ass it.
[00:23:00] You go all in and commit to change your life before you go to bed.
Set your alarm a little bit earlier and just see.
You'll actually be excited to wake up tomorrow.
As tired as you f*cking will be.
You get the day done.
You win the battle.
You reflect that night as you go back to bed.
You say, “Do I like doing this? Do I want to do this again? Do I want to see what I got tomorrow?”[00:23:30] Then every day is just, “I want to see what I got tomorrow. I'm going to run it again. I'm going to run it better. I'm going to see what I got.”
You just do that long enough, just see where it takes you.
Crush it.
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:24:00]
-
In this episode, Phil talks about the 2 fundamental keys to financial success. He emphasizes that success in business, sales, or any aspect of life isn't just about acquiring skills; it's rooted in personal development. Many people fail because they skip critical steps, believing that learning a skill set alone will lead to success. Using analogies and his own life experiences, Phil stresses the importance of building a strong personal foundation, that combines confidence, work ethic, and mindset, before mastering specific skills. He challenges us to acknowledge our own personal development issues and to embrace the hard work and discipline required for true success.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(00:51) - There Are No Overnight Millionaires
(02:56) - Winning Takes More Than Just Skills
(07:57) - Why You Need Personal Development Before Skill Acquisition
(13:44) - Taking Ownership of Your Problems
(19:57) - There Are Two Types of People: Which One Are You?
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Transcription:
[00:00:00] Everybody thinks that they don't have a personal development problem.
They go after the skill set.
That's why your business f*cking sucks.
That's why you can't make money in sales, even though you're in a sales position.
That's why, even if you're in management, supervising anything in corporate life, that's why you're f*cking unhappy there.Because of this.
What's going on you guys.
[00:00:30] It's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
There's only two real stages to making money.
Everybody has asked me, “Phil, how do I make more money?”[00:01:00] And the thing about most people, most people don't even know how to make like six figures in the corporate life.
And they go from like making two thousand, three thousand dollars per month, maybe, inconsistently, to wanting to make millions of dollars as an entrepreneur, as a business owner.That sh*t doesn't work like that guys.
[00:01:30] Can we get over this whole f*cking idea that you just becoming an overnight millionaire?
That you don't have to do hard work for years to even get from $3,000 a month to $5,000 to $10,000 to more?
It's so f*cked up that people really think that you just somehow start making a boatload of money and you can skip steps.The reason why most people struggle with making more money is because they skip steps, okay?
I'm gonna make it super clear when I say life-changing money in this video.
[00:02:00] I'm not talking about making $500,000 in a year.
I'm not talking about making a million dollars in a year.
Let's just talk about $100,000.Let's talk about $150,000.
Let's just talk about $200,000 in a year.
When I say life-changing money, in this video specifically, let's talk about $100,000 to $200,000 per year.Because we all f*cking know that from where you're at to making $100,000 to $200,000 per year will probably be life changing.
[00:02:30] For some of you guys, very little of you, very little, maybe $400,000, maybe $500,000 would be life changing.Or maybe it's just adding on another six figures.
But again, just for the sake of this f*cking thing, $100,000-200,000 would be life changing for you.
Okay, let's just start there.
There's two phases that you need to understand that will change your life.
Phase number one is a foundation.Phase number two is the skill set.
Most people try to go to the skill set.
[00:03:00] Most people try to figure out a way to make overnight cash.
And because of that, they waste so much time in a negative place because they're very unconfident with sticking around for the longterm.
Because what it takes to be able to make that amount of money for a long period of time is discipline, it's work ethic, it's a mindset, because the moment any of those things break, you're not making f*cking money.[00:03:30] So it's so dumb to me that people really think that if they learn sales, if they learn business sh*t, if they learn marketing, if they learn this crap, that suddenly they're going to start making money.
But let me ask you a question.
If I gave you the opportunity to drive NASCAR, okay, I'm going to give you the car.I'm going to give you the suit.
I'm going to give you the f*cking thing, but you don't know how to f*cking drive that car.
Are you going to win?
Are you going to be a champion?
[00:04:00] No.If I'm like, “Hey, you can play in the NBA for a game. I'm gonna give you shorts. I'm gonna give you the f*cking jersey. I'm gonna give you shoes signed by Michael Jordan and f*ck it. You can play with Michael Jordan too.”
You really think that you're just gonna start crushing it on the court?
Stop f*cking lying to yourself, please God.
[00:04:30] This is the stupidest sh*t that I hear from people who want to start making more money for their family.
They don't realize that there's something here that comes before the skill set.And that thing, that foundation is you, Jesus.
Everybody that sees how I've leveled up from Philippines, to f*cking poverty even in the US, struggling, struggling, struggling, to living my dream life, that I just learned skill sets throughout the time.No, you dumb motherf*ckers.
I became a different operator.[00:05:00] I became a different human being.
The person that is standing in front of you today is built.
I've had all of the flaws and more.
I worked through those flaws so I can easily do this stuff over here.
Whenever somebody comes to me and says, “Hey Phil, I want to change my life. I want to make a lot of money. I want to change my family's life. I want to give them the lives they deserve.”And I'm like, “Okay, cool. So like, what are your skill sets? Like, what can you actually bring to the table?”
[00:05:30] ‘Nothing. I'm a mechanic. I drive a f*cking Instacart. I drive an Uber. I f*cking work at Target. I work at Walmart. I do this thing. I've been in sales, but I lost my job.’
You don't think that you have a personal development problem over here?
You think that you're squared away over here, but you want the skill set?
That's not how it works.
If you're barely making it in a corporate environment, you're not making it anywhere else, motherf*cker.[00:06:00] Understand that the reason why people paid me a lot of money in corporate America was because I was very developed personally, my confidence level in corporate America far exceeds anybody else.
My work ethic in corporate America far - I just f*cking crushed everybody.
Nobody could touch me.
I was moving and moving and moving.And yeah, I was probably pretty f*cking unhealthy drinking monsters and just f*cking downing coffees and sh*t.
[00:06:30] But you can't outperform me.I'm a hustler.
I had zero skill sets except my development.
And that personal development is the reason why I outshined everybody.
That's what bred opportunities for me.That's how I made more money.
That's how I went from f*cking odd jobs that paid me 400 to 600 dollars every 2 weeks, to getting paid 6 figures corporate life.
[00:07:00] Guys, if you can't make 6 figures in your corporate 9 to 5, please stop giving yourself the expectation that you're making 7 figures as an entrepreneur.Just please stop that.
Please at least get to six figures.
At least prove to yourself that you can just make six figures.
How about that?
Jesus Christ.
Some of you guys have the weirdest f*cking expectations of you.
Like, you're just gonna somehow, like, f*cking, spaceship's gonna hit you and you're gonna become, like, Superman.[00:07:30] And you're gonna enter God mode, and you're just gonna, “UGH! F*cking struggling to make two thousand a month, and I'm making f*cking, like, two million a month. F*ck it.”
That's not how it works.
Jesus Christ.
No wonder you guys are so unhappy.
No wonder you're struggling in life because the expectations you're setting for yourself are like, what the f*ck?Look at anybody great in this life.
Do you think that they just went from regular f*cking Joe to f*cking Super Joe?
No.
That Joe had to get f*cking forged.
The first level is your foundation.
[00:08:00] If I ask you right now, just straight up where you're at in your life.
If I'm like, “Hey, can you change your life tomorrow? Can you make double the income that you have in a different industry? (Which is going to be sales, by the way. You're either going to do sales or you're going to build your business. That's how you're going to unlock actual freedom in your life.) Can you do that tomorrow?”And if your answer is not yes, then you have a personal development problem.
You don't have a skillset problem.
You don't even believe in you.
[00:08:30] If you can't even just say yes to that one tomorrow, quit your job, go find a sales job, quit your job, start a business.
If the answer is not f*cking yes, with conviction that you will pour your heart into it, your soul into it.
You're not ready for the skill set because a skill set is like giving you a weapon system that you can't even f*cking manipulate yet.[00:09:00] Because you're too unconfident, you can't even load it, you can't even aim, you can't even fire, you can't even get on target, because you're not confident.
Jesus Christ.
I don't even know how else to explain this.
Okay, here.
Let's break it down Barney-style.
Apparently, we need to.
If I said, “Hey, you ever heard of Iron Chef? Hey, you can compete in the Iron Chef.”And you're like, “Well, Jesus Christ, bro. These knives are super sharp.”
And you start f*cking cutting yourself by accident because you're trying too fast and then you start shaking and then you can't even perform.
[00:09:30] Does it f*cking matter that you got a culinary genius to tell you what to do?
If you can't even f*cking cut something without cutting yourself, you dumb f*ck.You don't have a skill set issue, you have a f*cking personal development issue.
Please, understand this.
[00:10:00] If you threw me in corporate environment right now, even if I started as a f*cking janitor, give me 90 days, and I will run that f*cking store.
Give me 90 days, and I will run that f*cking thing.
I will rank myself up just through sheer f*cking hustle.90 days or less.
Guaranteed.
If you don't have that confidence in yourself, that's the issue.
If you say you do, then go f*cking do it!
But you won't!
Duh!
Because you're not developed yet!
If you really think that you can do it, go f*cking do it.
[00:10:30] Or, you can stop lying to yourself that you are this f*cking operator when we both know that you're not, and then you can finally be like, “Oh, Jesus Christ, I've been lying to myself this whole f*cking time. No wonder my life is in shambles. Because I've been lying to myself that I can do this thing. When instead of just being a f*cking student to the game and to life, I've just been lying. Because my ego and pride hurt too much to know that I'm just not good enough yet.”
Why is that a bad thing?
Most people miss this personal development.So they try to learn a skill set they're not prepared for.
[00:11:00] And then they're like, “Okay, I'm gonna learn sales. I'm gonna learn the thing to say. I'm gonna learn the script. I'm gonna learn everything that a salesperson needs to f*cking learn.”And then they get in front of somebody, and they're like, “Uh…”
And it's like, oh my god.
Literally, you know what to say and now you're choking up because you're afraid of what the f*cking other person is going to say.
You dumb motherf*cker.
No wonder you think it's the skill set.
It's you.
You're on.
[00:11:30] Nobody's going to buy from you if you're not confident.
You cannot sell yourself if you're not confident, you can't get a promotion, you can't get a raise, you can't build a team, you can't run a company, you can't do sh*t if you're not confident.But people think that they have this skill set issue.
The only two levels you have is the foundation, your personal development, and then the skill set.
If you lack the foundation and you only have this thing over here, you're not gonna execute at the highest possible f*cking level.
[00:12:00] You might get a couple wins here and there, but you're gonna be inconsistent as f*ck.Man, it's so dumb.
Okay, oh I just thought of something that might finally track for some of you motherf*ckers.Imagine there's a good looking dude, okay?
Skill set.
Good looking dude.
He has the f*cking comb over or whatever the f*ck.
He has a nice little beard.
He has f*cking - I don't know, he's all suited up.He's in a f*cking - he's in a nice car, okay?
[00:12:30] He has it going on externally.
He lacks confidence.
So he walks up to a girl, looking f*ckin like, what is it, Fabio?
And then Fabio f*ckin chokes.
Gets in front of the girl and he's like, “Hey, so f*ckin like, here's my car, I'm f*ckin awesome, right?”Like, Jesus Christ, bro, like, that chick's walkin away.
You can have everything external.
You guys know these people.
You probably got a friend that's like that.
You know, good looking dude, f*cking terrible with the ladies.
[00:13:00] Because he doesn't, he doesn't understand.
He doesn't get it.
Internally, he's f*cked.
Then you have f*cking, Joe.
I'm just gonna keep calling him Joe.Joe over there, you know, medium, average f*cking dude.
Confident as f*ck.
That's the guy that's always pulling all the girls.
And you're just like, “How the f*ck does that guy, how does he do it?”[00:13:30] Even though he doesn't have all the charm, he doesn't have all the things, the confidence in himself is all it takes.
Do you say, I mean, I cannot break this down Barney-style, even if you guys aren't tracking that, if you're not making the money that you want to make and you think it's something else and it's not you, you got a f*cking issue, okay?
You're going to be losing forever.
I'm trying to save you from this.
I've helped people make more money in corporate life.I've made - I've helped people make money as 1099 contractors.
I have helped business owners make more money.
I've helped a lot of people in different industries make more money.
And I can guarantee you 9 out of 10 times, it's not the skillset.
[00:14:00] It's you.
The moment you're a f*cking lethal, you can crush anything.You'll never give up.
You'll never be afraid of failure.
You're never gonna let a bad day, a bad week, a bad month affect your overall performance.
I don't even know, guys.
Like, some of you guys really do want to make more money.
And I'm rooting for you.
I really want you to make more money.
I really want you to be able to take that vacation with your family.I really want you to be able to spoil your kids.
[00:14:30] But, if you keep lying to yourself that you are like this savage, cause I can see it, when you guys are DMing me, I know if you're confident or not, I can sense that sh*t.
And I'm like, “No, guy, just f*ckin please, don't go that way. Please, God, go this way. Understand that I've built myself, and I've built people from all over the world, and I know you got this issue here.”[00:15:00] And those stupid f*cks are always the ones that are like, “No, no, no. I have a skill set issue.”
And I'm like, ‘No, you f*cking turd. You're not coachable. No wonder nobody wants to f*cking work with you. If you're like this, as a potential client, imagine what you're like as a partner, as a team member. You probably think you know better than everybody, that's why nobody wants to give you a f*cking opportunity, you dumb f*ck.’
Oh my god, and it takes people like months or years to finally be like, “Oh Jesus Christ, I'm still in the same spot, other people are leveling up, I must not know something.”[00:15:30] It's like, ‘No sh*t turd, I said that sh*t three to six months ago.’
And then some of you guys are overly confident, f*cking failing at life, having zero track record.
And then you're like, “You know what? I don't need help. I'm just gonna do this on my own. I'm gonna read books. I'm gonna f*cking YouTube University this sh*t. I'm gonna f*cking crush it, bro.”How many of you have I talked to that said that sh*t?
3, 6, 12 months?36 months?
[00:16:00] Because you know I've talked to you for years now, are in a worse position than when we first started f*cking talking, because you believed in you way too much than somebody who, like, already outperforms you.
Some of you guys ego and pride is, like, way too f*cking high.
Like, you don't even have a track record of success in any area.
In relationships, in marriage, in your job, in your career, in your business, in anything.[00:16:30] And you're just like, “No! Phil doesn't know what he's talking about. He f*cking, I'm just gonna, uh, YouTube. Google. I'm gonna read books. Um, how to win friends and influence people. Uh, f*cking, I'm gonna read all these other books, and I'm gonna crush it.”
I did that.
But I'm also not a normal f*ck.
I actually apply everything that I've ever learned in my life, which is what's lacking in the world.
Execution.
[00:17:00] If you're willing to stop lying to yourself, that you actually have a personal development problem, which is probably why you still drink liquor, which is probably why you still smoke pot, which is probably why you still yell at your f*cking kids, which is probably why your wife doesn't even look at you like she loves you, And you can finally accept that there's something fundamentally wrong with you, then maybe you can learn a skill set to actually change your f*cking life.Maybe.
[00:17:30] But Jesus, what it takes for somebody to actually put their pride and ego aside and actually be like, “Oh sh*t. Yeah, there is something wrong with me. Yeah, my track record is kind of f*cked Yeah, like I'm f*cking like 10 years 20 years 30 years older than Phil and I don't got my life together. Jesus Christ There's something wrong with me.”
How long is it gonna take for you to just be like, “Damn, there's something wrong with me and that's okay. Day one, I can start now. I can start changing now.”
The more you refuse this first step, you really think you're gonna get to step two?
[00:18:00] Good f*cking luck.Because at some point, and you guys let me know, do you want me to do content on skillset?
Cause I can guarantee, if I start teaching skillset, it's gonna go over your f*cking head.
And you're gonna be like, “Yeah, I'm learning, I'm learning, I'm learning, I'm learning, I just need more time to learn.”And you're never going to apply it because you're not confident enough.
And then you're going to say you're doing the things and you're not going to do it.
[00:18:30] And then you're going to waste time and your family's going to be like, “Yo, yo, like the kids are in college. It's fine. Like you're not actually going to do it.”It's like, “Just stop. It's just stop now.”
You want to be that f*cking guy?
Where your family was like waiting on you to change their life and they're like, “Um, I don't know. Everybody's gone. Like, we can probably get divorced now.”Are you going to wait for that?
Jesus Christ.
Get your ego and pride out of the way and understand there's only two levels motherf*ckers.And level one is the hardest for everybody.
[00:19:00] That's where everybody breaks off.
Everybody thinks that they don't have a personal development problem.
They go after the skill set.
That's why your business f*cking sucks.
That's why you can't make money in sales even though you're in a sales position.
That's why even if you're in management, supervising, anything in corporate life, that's why you're f*cking unhappy there.Because of this.
Jesus.
[00:19:30] If you guys really want to learn how to make more money, please, Jesus Christ, God, the universe, whoever the f*ck you pray to, please help you.
Understand that you have a problem here.
You are the problem, okay?
You are the problem.
Say it with me.
“I am the problem.”Say it again.
“I am the problem. I am the problem. I'm the problem. I have an ego. I have a pride that's preventing me from learning the things that's actually going to help me change my life.”
Now say it after this and actually mean it and actually own it.
[00:20:00] Cause I swear the one person that actually does this is going to reach out to me.Gonna comment on one of my pieces of content one day and just be like, “Phil, that video f*cking changed my life. Cause I actually did the thing. I stopped lying to myself. And I stopped trying to do this thing. And I did the first step, Phil. And my whole life f*cking changed.”
Guys, I work with people from all over the world.
Humans are the same.
They have the same flaws.
They have the same reasons why they do not succeed.
I swear, if you think you have a skill set issue.
[00:20:30] But you haven't mastered level one.
The first f*cking step.
You're gonna be broke forever.
And it sucks for your family to have to deal with that sh*t because you had too much f*cking ego and pride to accept that it was anything else.Okay?
Two levels, guys.
Your personal development, then a skill set.
Your personal development, then a skill set.
The people that win, that I only teach a skill set to, I can sense that they've personally developed because of how they receive information like this.
[00:21:00] The people, because there's going to be two types, okay?Let's see what type you are.
One type is going to be like all triggered, like, “Oh, f*ck, no. Who the f*ck is this guy? F*ck this guy. He doesn't know me. He doesn't know what I've been through. He doesn't know what I've had to go through to get to this f*cking level.”Bah, bah, bah, bah, bah.
That's the loser.
That's the person that's not ready for the skillset.
That's ego and pride.
Again, here's a mirror.
[00:21:30] Then there's another person that's like, “Yeah, yeah, that's totally true. I f*cked up. I own my sh*t. Ah, I have to work on me. I have to drop the drugs. I got to drop the liquor. I got to be a better man for my wife, for my family. I got to be better, 100%.”Those are the people I can teach a skillset to because they're coachable.
They can receive information.
They can look at themselves in the f*cking eyes and not lie to themselves.
They'll implement the personal development.
And they'll actually be able to implement the skill set because then they're not gonna beat themselves up when they don't get results right away.[00:22:00] They can be like, “Oh yeah, I didn't get results because I f*cking suck. I didn't get results because I didn't implement probably at the highest possible level. Let me see how I can level that sh*t up.”
The person that's not personally developing is like, “Oh, business is not working out for me. I'm special. Ah, people aren't buying today, even though I'm in sales. Ah, it's the economy. It's inflation. Ah, something, f*cking, cat died.”
[00:22:30] There's always somebody else.
You see what I'm saying?
“Ah, f*cking somebody got the promotion instead of me. Ah, politics. Bleh.”Goddamn.
If you guys can't see that it's a personal development problem, you're f*cked.I mean, Jesus Christ.
If you really want to learn how to make more money, please focus on this.
Listen to and watch all my content.
And you'll realize that the tactics, the strategy, the skill set is so f*cking simple.
[00:23:00] But you just gotta get out of your own f*cking way.
Please.
You owe it to yourself and you owe it to your family.Please.
Stop that sh*t.That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:23:30]
-
In this episode, Phil shares his journey of overcoming addiction and challenges the commonly held notions about weed and other substances. He recalls how his struggles with drugs and alcohol stemmed from deep-seated pain and a desire to escape reality. Phil discusses how these habits affected his life, from his relationships to his career, emphasizing the importance of facing one's demons head-on. He challenges us to reassess our lives and habits, arguing that true success and happiness come from self-discipline and facing life's challenges without relying on substances. This episode is a raw and honest reflection on personal growth, responsibility, and the pursuit of a fulfilling life without the crutch of addiction.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:30) - Debunking Myths About Weed and Achievement
(06:59) - A Journey Through Addiction and Recovery
(12:49) - Using Emotional Anchors To Quit Addiction
(15:57) - Rejecting Social Norms of Substance Abuse
(19:39) - Surround Yourself With The Right Players
(21:44) - Are You Really Happy or Just Settling?
(24:03) - Choosing a Better Life for Yourself and Loved Ones
(26:49) - Creating a Beautiful Life Beyond Addiction
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Transcription:
[00:00:00] I swear, it's always the dumb motherf*ckers who actually don't know pain, that think they can speak on it.
I come from experience.
I know what it does.
I was the guy, when we were popping pills, I wasn't the one pill guy.
I was six to eight pills deep, ten pills deep, just cuz.
I wasn't the smoke one blunt, take one rip of the bong type of motherf*cker.I was like, give me a f*cking blunt to the neck and let me get another one.
And then while I'm doing that, let's pass around more.
[00:00:30] And then after that, let's hit the bong.
And then after that, let's chug some drinks.
And then after that, let's pop some E.
Let's go do this other stuff.
That's where I'm coming from.So for you guys that are like, “Yeah, you know, I got with Jessica, and Victor, and John, and we just did it every once in a while. It's not that bad.”
You dumb motherf*ckers.
You don't know what it's like to come from pain, and to medicate, to not feel that pain.
[00:01:00] What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol, and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:01:30] Stop smoking weed.
Alright?
And there's gonna be some f*cking captains and f*cking all of these advocates, they're like, “Oh no, weed's not that bad for you. Weed's this. I know a lot of CEOs that are successful and smoke with - Snoop Dogg smokes weed guys. Snoop Dogs smokes weed, so it's okay.”Motherf*cker.
If you look at your life and you look at Snoop Dogg's life, who's successful?
[00:02:00] Who took their entire life to become successful and where the f*ck are you at, you dumb motherf*cker?
It's people like that, that try to say, drinking is, is good, smoking weed is, it's fine, because these big ass people that are successful in the world, do it.“So Phil, stop shoving your opinion down people's throats.”
You dumb motherf*cker.
You find me one person that's hyper successful.
[00:02:30] There are millions of people that are struggling because weeded doesn't do for them what it did for a f*cking Snoop Dogg.Duh dumbass, obviously.
Why do you think people are struggling in the world, but you're dumbass, who has a dad that smokes weed, that the manager at f*cking Walmart is f*cking crushing it in life.No, you dumbass.
People like you that talk about weed that have never actually achieved anything successful in your life are the reasons why people continue to struggle in this world.
[00:03:00] Because your little ass opinion about something that you don't even understand or comprehend and your only opinion is validated through Snoop Dogg smoking weed his entire career and like crushing it.Are you crushing it motherf*cker?
Can you say that from your level?
Because for me, coming from a third world country, coming from the places in California where smoking weed is like the thing, I couldn't get to a certain level by having all of these vices.
[00:03:30] I couldn't get to a certain level by being addicted to doing stupid sh*t that fills the void versus me learning how to fill my own void.
You guys understand that who you listen to matters far more than like just their random ass opinion.
If somebody can't tell me that they have achieved a level of success in their life, while still smoking weed, I'm not listening to you, dumbass.And those are the people that speak the loudest.
Because for me, most people that tell me that are far less successful than me.
[00:04:00] And I'm the guy that's like, don't f*cking do it.
Drop it.
I wasted years thinking that I needed that to feel good, but the reality is I didn't need it.
And I was just telling myself that I did because I was too f*cking weak to really be real with myself.So I want you guys to understand something.
Smoking weed, I'm not telling you how to f*ck to live, what I am telling you is what's always worked for me, and what hasn't worked for me.
[00:04:30] And all of the things that I wish that I knew back then.
But look, I don't have a lot of great people in my life to tell me what's right and what's wrong.I didn't have a father figure to tell me what's right and what's wrong.
I didn't have people that I could trust and listen to, that they wanted the best for me without being some dumbass on the internet that's like, “Snoop Dogg smokes weed.”So f*cking can anybody.
Dumbasses.
It's people like you that fail people in the world.[00:05:00] I will tell you from my own experiences coming from some dumb motherf*cker who was always smoking and drinking, to being around dumbasses in my life who thought that was the coolest thing, that were not successful whatsoever, in any shape or form, in business, in career, in marriage, in relationships, in any f*cking area.
That was this pool of people I used to hang around.
Now, the millionaires I hang around, don't do any of that sh*t.
I wonder who I should listen to.
I should probably listen to, the f*cking troll on the internet that says, “Snoop Dogg, f*cking, duh.”[00:05:30] Or should I talk to the people making eight, nine, and ten figures, saying, “Nah bro. That's good. Keep your mind clear so you can focus on the thing. There's other things you can be doing versus getting high.”
And look, I get it, there's Snoop Dogg.
There's Dan Bilzerian.
There's all of these people that are successful.
But you have to remember, there's a reason why it's called the top 1%.
The top 1 percent does more than most people.
So their operating systems are different than the average Joe.
[00:06:00] So who I'm talking to is not the f*cking unicorn who can smoke weed and still be hyper successful.
If that's you, get the f*ck off the video.
Because I know, I guarantee you, there's already people right now that are like, “Damn I needed to hear the hard truth because my life was going down the drain. My life wasn't going the direction I wanted it to go.”The message is for those people.
You guys understand how the internet works yet?
If the message isn't for you, f*ck off.
That's how it works.
[00:06:30] Because the person that needed to hear the message was about to lose their wife.That person was about to lose their job.
That person was about to burn down their own business because they were spending more time high than they were focused on building the business.
Do you understand?
So if that's you, and you're some dumbass who thinks you know it all, get the f*ck out.You can go watch Snoop Dogg's videos where he's smoking weed and like jerk off to it.
I don't f*cking know if that's what you do.
F*ck it.This video is not for you.
Everybody else, welcome.
This is the real raw truth.
This is the sh*t that you need to hear because you need to change your life.
[00:07:00] So let's go all the way back to when I started smoking weed.
I think I was like 13, 14 years old.Because I was trying to fill a void.
My parents got divorced.
They started the process, sh*t took like 8 years.
And I didn't know how to emotionally move through things.
I didn't know how to experience things.
I didn't know that all the darkness that I felt was not normal.
I had to normalize darkness and pain.I had to normalize all of the sadness, guilt, shame, everything that I could ever feel.
[00:07:30] And the only way I knew how to handle that, guys, smoking weed, popping pills, doing drugs, f*cking drinking my ass off.
And at 13-14 years old guys, that's not normal.
I thought it was normal.
I thought it was like, “Oh, you're from the Bay area. Of course, that's what you're going to do.”We normalized it, but it's not normal to do that.
It's not good.
It's not healthy.
And thank God I joined the Marine Corps.
Thank God that I did.
[00:08:00] Because even though that made me more disgruntled, at least it kept me away from drugs.
At least it kept me away from, like, smoking.At least it kept me away from that sh*t.
I was still drinking.
But, at least that's not everything else too.
But here's the thing, I spent years of my life lost.
Throughout my entire life, since 13-14 years old, I spent all that time lost because I was so medicated on all of these things.
I never was able to heal things because it hurts so bad to look at my demons, to look at all of the areas in my life where I felt like sh*t.Because I didn't want to face it.
I didn't know how to face it.
[00:08:30] Nobody ever taught me that sh*t.
Nobody ever taught me that it's okay to cry as a boy, as a man.
Nobody ever told me that it's okay to feel like sh*t and that doesn't make you weak.
That like, it's human to actually feel f*cking emotions.Nobody ever told me that if I'm angry, I don't need to drink to be not angry.
I can work out.
I could go on a hike.
I can do other things to outflow all of this negative energy.
I never had somebody to teach me that stuff.
So what did I do?
I did what everybody else said was okay.
The f*cking, the “Snoop Dogg f*cking smokes.”[00:09:00] Those motherf*ckers.
“Yeah, just smoke. It's all good. Like, just f*cking burn it, bro. Like, f*cking, it's not even, it's not even anything. Let's just have fun for tonight, and then we'll deal with it tomorrow. Let's have fun for tonight, deal with it tomorrow.”That tomorrow lasted years.
Over a decade of my life.Majority of my f*cking life.
I medicated through drinking, smoking weed, doing all the dumb sh*t.
[00:09:30] I wish I had a dad that told me that, like, “Bro, like, you, work out, spend your time there, go on a hike, be one with nature, meditate, pray, learn these other things, these other ways that you can heal through that, because what you're trying to do is heal.”But because it's so emotionally scary, you emotionally shut down and you use some type of vice, so that way you don't feel the very things that scare you the most, which is self acceptance, it's looking at your demons in the f*cking eyes.
Nobody ever taught me that sh*t.
[00:10:00] And when you think about how that evolves over time as you start building businesses for yourself, as you start building families, you're not present with those families.
I lost years with my firstborn.
Years.
She's only three.
And that first year?
Man, there's like parts and bits and pieces that I remember that I recall, but f*ck, bro, like, I could have had so much more, but I was so stressed out about losing my job during the shutdown to going online that all I did was medicated.[00:10:30] And I kept telling myself, “Well bro, you rate 30 percent for disability from the military, you lost your job, you have all this nerve and tissue damage, you're a new dad, new husband, new everything, everything's falling to sh*t, of course you need it bro. Of course you need it. Of course, it's okay to just smoke every f*cking night for literally no reason but to start smoking.”
And I'm so thankful that I became aware that I just started smoking for the sake of smoking.
It wasn't even doing anything for me anymore.
It was just like this habit.
And that's the dangerous part.
[00:11:00] When it just becomes a habit for you to do a thing where it no longer needs to even exist in your life.
I used to tell myself, “Well f*ck bro, like literally. Literally, I can smoke. Literally, I have all of the reasons why I can literally smoke.”And while people are like, “Hey, here's a prescription to smoking.”
I could have used that excuse 100%.
But I also realized, and I was real with myself, unlike some of you motherf*ckers, that I was just doing it to do it.
I was just getting high to get high.[00:11:30] It was just part of my natural routine, versus like, learning that I can just replace that with sleeping early.
I can replace that with like, working out more, which is probably why I got a f*cking dad bod in the first place, because I'd rather smoke weed versus working out.
I'd rather smoke weed and eat sh*t versus eat right and track my sh*t.Again, old self, new self.
Imagine that.Smoking doesn't do anything for you in the long term, in the grand scheme of things.
[00:12:00] Smoking makes you waste your time, makes you waste your days, it makes you waste memories that you're never going to be able to get back.
I lost so many good memories with my daughter.
And sometimes when I, when I see the videos, I'm like, “Damn, I like, I remember that now.”But imagine if I could have downloaded it in that moment and like not need something to reference, to remember that moment, imagine how much more beautiful life is this time around with my second.
Every moment I remember, every moment I'm present.
[00:12:30] And I'm telling you this from just deciding to stop smoking.
I stopped smoking in January, 2023.
I was like, I was just like, “Ah, I don't know, I'm turning 30 this year. I guess I should f*cking just be a legit f*cking human adult and just stop smoking weed.”So I just decided to and then I stopped.
Threw everything away.Canned it.
If you guys want to stop smoking weed, the biggest thing that you have to do is you have to attach that desire to want change to something emotional that means something to you.[00:13:00] So for me, especially if you got kids, this, this will probably work.
Envision a world where your kids don't have you anymore because you're gone, you're dead.
Whether it was from the weed and you got f*cking lung cancer, or the weed led to something else, or the weed led you to a place where you shouldn't have been and you get f*cking gunned down, somebody hits you, stupid sh*t, you decide to drive, I don't f*cking know, something bad happens because you decided to be in that environment.[00:13:30] And now you got kids that are left without a father.
You got kids left without a parent.
You have a wife that's left without their partner, without help with those kids.
Imagine the pain that you caused because you were causing yourself pain, and you self inflicted pain which caused pain to other people.Can you imagine that life?
If you can't, spend more time there.
[00:14:00] Because for me, that feeling of guilt of leaving my children behind, that guilt of not being the man that I thought I could be, that guilt of leaving my wife alone because I couldn't handle my own sh*t, that guilt made it very easy for me to walk away.You have to remember that in order to change a bad habit, you have to replace it with a good one.
So all I started doing was spending more time with my f*cking family.
[00:14:30] I started being able to appreciate my days a little bit more and some people are like, ‘Oh, what about the um, You know the uh, the what is it called when you f*cking backtrack and like your body starts responding to it, whatever um, withdrawals?”
I didn't have any f*cking withdrawals.
I had more withdrawals from giving up on coffee than I did giving up weed.
Coffee was tough.
Now, I can do another video on like f*cking taking coffee out of the equation, where it's, again, it was like an addiction to coffee, like it was a f*cking - it was weird.
I'll do another video on that, but when you emotionally decide to change, when you emotionally decide that something is not for you, it no longer serves you, it makes it easier to commit to that decision.[00:15:00] But if it's just like, I'm just going to stop because it's f*cking New Year's, you're never going to commit to it because it means nothing to you.
So what you have to do is you have to think about the identity, the self that you want to create, that you can be proud of every single day in comparison to who you are today, and you got to see the consequence of never achieving that life, never achieving that version of you.[00:15:30] Because if you're able to actually think about the future self, who you have the potential to be, you think about your family, you think about your kids, you think about all of these things, you can think about how you can impact the world with your business, and you realize that if you're gone, so many people will lose.
So many things will break without you.And when you can feel that, that true guilt of, “Damn, I couldn't be there because I couldn't be the best version of me because I let myself down because I think I thought I needed something else outside of me to heal me when in reality, all I needed to do was start looking inward to heal myself.”
[00:16:00] Man, like, I wish that people didn't listen to the sheep of the world.
The sheep of the world are the people that tell you it's okay to drink, it's okay to smoke.
But those motherf*ckers have never felt darkness the way that we do.We're a different breed of people.
We're the people that have cracks in our armor that weed and drugs and alcohol, it affects us a little bit different than f*cking silver spend food f*ckin Victor over there, who never had to deal with any of those f*cking problems.[00:16:30] So weed, drugs, alcohol, doesn't affect you the same way it affects me, motherf*cker.
When I go deep into that sh*t, it's hard to come out.
So you dumb motherf*ckers who comment on this, that don't actually understand how this affects people like me, how this affects people like us, you're the dumb motherf*ckers that actually give permission to people you have no f*cking right to actually shove your opinion down people's throats, you dumb bitch.[00:17:00] I swear, it's always the dumb motherf*ckers who actually don't know pain that think they can speak on it.
I come from experience.
I know what it does.
I was the guy, when we were popping pills, I wasn't the one pill guy.
I was six to eight pills deep, ten pills deep, just cuz.
I wasn't the smoke one blunt, take one rip of the bong type of motherf*cker.I was like give me a f*cking blunt to the neck, and let me get another one.
And then while I'm doing that, let's pass around more.
And then after that, let's hit the bong.
And then after that, let's chug some drinks
[00:17:30] And then after that, let's pop some E.
Let's go do this other stuff.
That's where I'm coming from.
So for you guys that are like, “Yeah, you know, I, I got with Jessica, and Victor, and John, and we just did it every once in a while, it's not that bad.”
You dumb motherf*ckers.
You don't know what it's like to come from pain, and to medicate, and to not feel that pain.
Obviously.
But for motherf*ckers like us?
Yeah, it's not good for us.
[00:18:00] It's not good to be around that darkness because what that does is it creates the opening for the darkness to continue the whispers.
When you come from somewhere broken, if there's a brokenness inside of you, guys, this sh*t does not serve you.It's not gonna help you.
And it's definitely not gonna help you to listen to stupid motherf*ckers who say, “It's just, it's good. It's just one time.”Go compare their life to my life.
Go compare their life to anybody else that you actually respect in the world.
Guaran-f*cking-tee you, they haven't accomplished sh*t in their life.[00:18:30] I haven't met not one successful person that's just like, “Yeah, everybody should just smoke. Everybody should just drink.”
Abso-f*cking-lutely.I haven't met not one person, personally.
That would just be an advocate for that.
That's actually successful in every area of your life.
In business, in health, and in marriage.I haven't seen it.
All you motherf*ckers that see like everybody like drinking and smoking.
I don't see any like successful marriages.
I love my marriage.
I don't f*cking know what you're talking about.
[00:19:00] It might be successful in business.
If I was single, I would be very successful too, because all I would do is work.But I also have a successful business, and I have a successful marriage, and I have a successful family.
Unless you have all of those three things and you're winning, I'm not talking to you.
I'm not listening to you.
So you gotta remember guys, it's very important that when you make these decisions to change your life, just know it's for the better, just know that there's something else calling to you.[00:19:30] Your purpose is actually calling to you now.
And it's been buried over time, over the years, because you had to like, medicate yourself in like, these different ways, but you don't have to now.
The moment you start hearing the whisper of like, “I think I need to stop. I think this doesn't serve me anymore. I think that I'm wasting my time now.”Lean into that.
It's scary as f*ck, because now, you're going to have to put pen to paper.
You're going to have to actually like, think about yourself.
You're actually going to have to think about these stuck emotions that you haven't even addressed for years.
[00:20:00] Burying them.The anger, the wrath, the shame, the lust, the guilt, all of it.
You're going to have to start facing all the things that scare you the most.
And that's why most people can't drop the vice.
Because it's too f*cking scary, but just trust me.
If you were to just take it a day at a time, and you can take all of the pain a day at a time, one pain at a time, you'll get through it.You surround yourself with people on this path of, like, self mastery, self actualization, you'll get through it.
[00:20:30] Because just like you did with the weed and the vices and all of this stuff, you're gonna start replacing that with people that think different, that are going through the same challenges like you, that can easily hear the whispers and be like, “Damn, this sh*t's calling to me, I could totally do it again.”You surround yourself with the right players, you can level up in life.
And just understand, the trials, the lessons don't get any easier, you just get stronger.
[00:21:00] But it's very important for you to know, if you're like me, that sh*t does not serve you in any shape, way, or form.
It's gonna hurt you.
It's gonna keep you from having the marriage that you want.It's going to keep you from having the business that you want.
It's going to keep you from having the body that you want.
It's gonna keep you from having the confidence and self esteem that you want.
It's gonna keep you from having the relationship with your kids that you want.
It's keeping you from the very thing that's gonna make you happy, that's actually gonna fill that void.Only you can gift yourself true healing.
Only you can decide to stop.
[00:21:30] Only you can decide to start.
You are in charge of this.
And it's a lot harder for now to say no to the things that no longer serve you until you're strong enough to just never need it again.
You know, there was a time in my life where I always thought I needed to drink at the end of each night.There's always a time in my life where I thought I needed to smoke weed at the end of each night.
There's always a time in my life that I thought every weekend I needed to go party and pop pills.
[00:22:00] I thought that that's what life was about, but now that I'm cleared of all the fog, that's not life.
That's you running from it.That's not how you live.
That's actually how you die.
And if you can learn that living feels way better, and being on this journey of life is way better than being on that path to death, you're going to start valuing yourself more.
You're going to start feeling more confident.
You're going to start making power moves that you normally wouldn't have.[00:22:30] You're going to start seeing yourself in a different light.
You're going to start feeling more proud, waking up more proud of yourself.
And you're just going to respect yourself a little bit different because now you do.
And you've physically shown yourself that.
That you can create that restraint and that discipline.That you and your body and your mind and your spirit is worth more than that temporary f*cking feeling smoke and weed gives you because we all know that it only lasts for a moment.
And then the whispers start, and then you need to hit it again to drown it out.
[00:23:00] But every hit that you take, it gets louder and louder, which means you need to take more rips and more rips and more rips in hopes that it drowns it out, but it never does.And you just smoke until you pass out.
You just smoke until you eat two bags of Jack in the Box f*cking tacos with the buttermilk.
We all know how it goes.
[00:23:30] You can say that you're like feeling good, self medicated, but if you really, if you really asked yourself and was real with yourself, like, “Am I actually happy with the life that I got? Am I really happy with like everything? My body, how I look at myself? Am I really happy with my mentality? Am I really happy emotionally? Am I really happy with like where I'm at in my career, in my business? Am I really happy with where I'm at with my family?”I can guarantee you're gonna hear a lot of no's, if you were really honest with yourself, because there's a lot of people that bullsh*t themselves.
Like, “Yeah, no, this is cool.”
I said, “Are you happy?” Motherf*cker.
I didn't say, “Are you settling? Are you good settling?”That's not what I said.
Are you happy?
Are you good with where you're at?
Are you like, “Damn, yeah, like, I wouldn't change sh*t.”
[00:24:00] I can guarantee you the answer is no.
So you gotta find out why you're important enough to stop.
And the best way to commit to this is to understand all of the consequences.
What are you gonna lose in yourself, in your life, in your family, in your business, in your career?
What are you gonna lose?[00:24:30] If you lose this battle to this one thing that you don't even need, who else outside of you is going to suffer because you won't give yourself permission to finally live again?
Who else?
Because if you're not going to do it for you, do it for those babies.You're not going to do it for you, do it for your wife.
You're not going to do it for you, do it for the people watching you and emulating you.
Do it for others.
Because in purpose, we do things to serve others.We sacrifice for others to live our purpose.
[00:25:00] We sacrifice all of these things that we think that we need in life and we become the advocates that you don't.
And you don't.
You don't need any of that sh*t.
What you need is discipline, you need to forge your mentality, you need to go to the f*cking gym, you need to eat right, you need to spend quality time with your family, you need to spend more time learning, and you need to spend more time with self, in nature, meditation.You need to spend more time present in the now and the moments.
[00:25:30] But you can't do that when you're hooked on drugs.
When you're drunk all the time.
You're never gonna be able to connect to self.
You're never gonna connect to the higher self.
So just stop smoking the weed, this sh*t doesn't actually serve you.And anybody that says that, “That f*cking person's successful.”
Just remember.
All you need to do is ask that person who said that, “Well, how successful are you, motherf*cker? Let me see your life.”Guarantee you, if we stack up lives, they're not living the life.
They can say they are.
[00:26:00] They're gonna be like, “Oh, I'm f*cking, you know, I'm f*cking doing just fine. I have the little, um, What is it? I have the, I have the BMW. I have the Armani watch, I have the, I'm a manager, I'm a supervisor, I'm a 9 to 5.”That's it?
That's all you got?
You got a girlfriend?
You're not even married?
You don't got kids?
Ah, ah, okay.
And you're good with that?
Okay.[00:26:30] Alright, if that's it, if that's who I should listen to, I'm not gonna do that f*cking thing.
I'm going that way.
If you're going that way, and that's your life, I'm good.
I'm gonna go this way.
The way that nobody else wants to go.Because, if that's what you're good with, I don't want to be good with that.
I deserve more than that.And I'm willing to put in more work than that sh*t.
Just realize that you can have a beautiful life.
And you don't need these things to feel good about you.
[00:27:00] You can find these different ways to feel good about you by putting in the work, keeping your, your word to yourself, and just showing yourself every single day what type of life you can create.
And when that becomes your mission in life, you'll find your true purpose, your true calling.And it's going to get clearer and clearer.
Every day you show up for yourself, it gets clearer and clearer and clearer.
The question is, “Are you willing to accept that you're not where you want to be in life so you can drop all the bullsh*t like smoke and weed that doesn't serve you?”[00:27:30] Number two, “Can you commit to it long enough to hear your calling?”
And number three, “When opportunity presents itself, will you step forward and step into your greatness?”
Because if you don't, you might be preparing, but if opportunity presents itself and you let it pass, you never know when that opportunity is going to come back.
And if you're too f*cking high to see that opportunity present itself, then you're f*cked.[00:28:00] So just realize, you can have a better life if you start looking at your life to be more valuable and much more worthy than just smoking all the damn time.
It has changed my life completely, and I did a lot of great things, but I know that it would have been a lot more fun and a lot easier if I just dropped it from the get go, if I never even thought that I needed it.I was a weaker man.
I wasn’t doing great in business, wasn't doing that great as a father, probably wasn't that present as a husband.
[00:28:30] So many areas I could have done a lot better at, and now I can because I'm clear.You can too, but it starts with accepting where you're at, accepting where you're not, and now every single day proving to yourself that you can get to that next level, one day at a time.
You got this.
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said, and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.Send it.
[00:29:00]
-
In this episode, Phil talks about personal growth and overcoming adversity. He emphasizes the importance of recognizing your potential and not shying away from life's challenges, even when misunderstood by others. Sharing his personal journey, including a life-altering car accident and struggles during the 2019 global shutdown, Phil highlights resilience and the power of a positive mindset in the face of setbacks. This episode serves as a motivational call for you to embrace your purpose, overcome trials, and leave a lasting impact on your bloodline and the world.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:12) - How Preparation Meets Opportunity in the Real World
(03:42) - When Life Knocks You Down
(12:44) - Mastering Chaos
(14:05) - The Secret Formula for Daily Success
(17:40) - Changing Your Bloodline's Destiny
(22:58) - The Call to Greatness
Transcription:
[00:00:00] You're the black sheep.
It's you.
You're the one that thinks this way.
You're the one that feels this way.
You're the one that can even fathom that it's possible.
Your family won't understand.
Your friends won't understand.
You might not even understand.
You'd be like, “Nah, I don't f*cking - that's a lot of responsibility, Phil.”Yeah, 100 f*cking percent.
But you're still here, aren't you?
You're still f*cking listening to this, aren't you?
When are you going to stop denying yourself?
When are you going to accept the fact that you're meant for something bigger than what you're already doing right now?
[00:00:30] But are you willing to walk that path?
Are you willing to be that person?
Are you willing to see if you can be?
What's going on you guys?
It's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
[00:01:00] And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
Here's the thing about opportunity.
Opportunity is not always going to wait for you.
A lot of people use this term called luck.
Luck is preparation meets opportunity.
That's luck.
[00:01:30] But what happens is, when the world, when people, when you are going through a hard time, you go into a shell.
You go into the safe place, emotionally safe place, where you think that, “If I don't see the problems of my life, if I don't see the things that are happening, then I can get through the day.”The truth is, all you're doing is burying things.
You're burying the emotions, you're burying the fear, you're burying all of the things that you need to process.Because what happens is, if you spend time in a shell, you're not preparing, you're not becoming better, you're not growing, you're not evolving.
At some point, opportunity will present itself.
And because you'll be in a negative place in your life, in your mentality, in your emotions, with your spirit, that opportunity will pass and that could have been a life changing opportunity.
So the thing about success that people don't really understand is it's not always going to feel like this upward trend.You don't always feel like you're winning.
[00:02:30] Success actually feels more like this.
And sometimes it's like way down and it's like, you're just down.
And then eventually you pick back up and you just quantum leap.
When you realize this, you'll realize that the most trying times of your life, that means that at that moment, when you're being tried the most, on the other side of that is your next evolution.It's the thing that you've been waiting for.
[00:03:00] But through the hard time where you're pushing through, pushing through, pushing through, you're becoming stronger.
Your mentality is more lethal.
You're filling up your spirit because now the sense of belief that you have in yourself that you can get through this is at an all time high.
So when the opportunity presents itself for you to finally break through, you're ready.
Most people don't realize this.
Most people get stuck in their life, and I'm talking about for their entire life, where this becomes a regret at some point.
[00:03:30] They spend their entire life hiding.
“I'm gonna be in a shell. I'm gonna protect myself. It's a little too hard. I don't have the time. I don't have the resources. All of these bad things happened to me.”Guys, I want you to understand something.
2019, global shutdown, started hearing the whispers.
Best time of my life, me and my wife's life.
We both just got promotions in our corporate job.
[00:04:00] We were both managers for a Fortune 500 company.
She was an operations manager.
I was a sales manager.
And life was about to be the beautiful corporate life that everybody dreams and hopes of.
And the only other variable to that was I had to leave because we couldn't be management and in a relationship under the same roof and another opportunity presented itself to me to be a business manager.
So I, that's what I became.
I became a business manager for a seven figure company to help them grow and scale all time high.
[00:04:30] That was still a promotion for me.
All time high.
The night of the celebration, we literally, we're very easy going people.
We went to go get steaks.
We celebrated.
We left.
On the regular drive home, on the regular freeway that we've always taken.
From the restaurant back home.
And in a 20 some odd minute ride.
Somebody else chose to text and drive on their phone.
[00:05:00] We weren't expecting it.
The moment our lives started going better, something brought us down.
We had to go through physical therapy for six to eight months.
One of my feet, my left side actually was higher than my right.
Maybe it's this way for you.
Higher than my right.
[00:05:30] Because the collision caused my muscles to contract so much that this side was basically like this, which pulled up all the muscles, which pulled up all the bones, and I was limping for months, half a year.
As we went up, life brought us down on top of this.
We tried to be very positive.
We said, “Hey, you know, like life can be taken from us at any moment, at any moment, you're my person. Let's just, let's do life together.”[00:06:00] And we decided before we even got married to have our child.
Pregnant now, and we decided we want to make sure that we create a household, and do things right, so we got married.
We got married on Zoom, to make sure we did it right.
During a global shutdown, we got married on Zoom.
It was me and her, in a previous office of mine, on my f*cking phone, somebody from Texas, was marrying us, legally, on Zoom.
[00:06:30] We thought that everything was gonna go good, and then the whispers of the global shutdown.
“Oh, people are losing their jobs.”We're trying to be as positive as possible.
Something brings us down.
So I want you to understand that every time something brings you up, something's gonna bring you down.
See, this is the little one right here.
This was the one.
[00:07:00] That at some point she was just a baby and she was the one that actually blessed us with everything because I had to perform.I had to make sure she was good.
I had to make sure I could provide.
So now we're starting a family.
Now we're doing things to create a household for ourselves.
Global shutdown, whispers, everybody's losing their job.
The world is going into chaos.
[00:07:30] As we started to hope for a better future, as we started to hope, again, we were brought down.
So, can you imagine what would happen if we decided that life is going to get better, we're going to start our family, we're going to do everything right.
And the news of what's happening in the world caused me to completely shut down.
[00:08:00] To fear everything in the world, like the rest of the world.
But it's not done yet.
Life isn't done testing me yet.
We had high hopes that the company needs their business manager.
My wife is going into maternity leave.
She's not going to be able to work for a while.
That's only going to carry us for so long, but this company needs me.
[00:08:30] What I found out was I needed to be cut first because I was the highest paid.
Again, brought down.
Every time I tried to rise, something brought me down.Hit after hit after hit after hit.
What I didn't do was break, because it wasn't about me.
[00:09:00] If I broke, my family would break.
If I didn't suffer, my family would suffer.
If I didn't sacrifice, my family would sacrifice.
Every time something brought me down, I chose to lean into it, to lean into the fear, to continue finding myself in those moments to see what do I need to do to adapt and overcome.
Everything that I've learned, all of the teachings of life culminated in that year.
[00:09:30] What is feel going to do?
That's when I chose to not go the traditional route and I went online and I've been online since.
Preparation met opportunity.
That was a blessing in disguise, what happened.
That has changed our lives.
My wife hasn't had to work for years.
I retired her many years ago.
I get to spend time, as you see, with my children.
They're part of my world.
[00:10:00] But can you imagine what would have happened if I did not have the operating system to persevere through the hard times, through the dark times.
I would have collapsed with hit after hit after hit.
I could have used every excuse.
“I don't feel good. I can barely walk. I feel pain in my hips, in my spine, in my neck.”Just so you guys understand, I'm 30 years old and I have arthritis in my shoulders, in my neck, in my back.
[00:10:30] I don't even know how that's possible.
I thought arthritis was only in your hands.
But life, the military, and this accident all broke the body down.
I could use every excuse not to win.
Not to survive.
I could say all of this is happening to me.
There's no way nobody else in the world is making it through.
Better off with all of this stuff happening.
I could have taken that ticket too.
I could have just done what everybody did.
[00:11:00] Get that check from the government and call it a day.
But I knew that if I did the same thing that everybody else was doing, I would not be able to yield any different results, not just for the now, but in the future.
I knew there was an opportunity that if I broke through all of the hard times, if I committed to the path, even if I couldn't see the results, I would figure out a way.
Every single day is a new battle.
I would figure out a way.
And I chose to figure out the path.
[00:11:30] I forged the path for myself.
I led my family through the times and most people when they're going through a hardship, they'll collapse, they'll break.
They won't find the operating system, the things, the support, the disciplines that get them through the day.
Guys, you, all you have to do is outlast the pain.
All you have to do is survive the day.
All you have to do is win today.
You don't have to win the week, the month, the year.
[00:12:00] You just have to win today, every day.
And if you do that, over time, you prove to yourself who the f*ck you are, and you actually start believing in yourself more.That every action that you take is, you're not guessing anymore.
It's calculated.
It's purposeful.
It's by design.But what happens with the f*cking weakness of the world?
[00:12:30] You guys are bred to believe that, in times of chaos, you have to bunker down and just get through it.No, no, no, no, no.
Please don't.
Please do not listen to the sheep of the world, who are not where you want to be in life.
Listen to the people that have forged the path for themselves.As you continue plugging in with me, in every area, in all my content, you will see remnants of my past, where I've come from, and where I am today, and where I'm continuing to go.
[00:13:00] And you will prove to yourself, through repetition, that somebody like me, can get to my level, and every other level after this.
From where I come from, so can you.
The only difference between us, is during times of chaos, I don't fall victim to the chaos.
I don't look at the chaos and say, “Oh, that's my life.”During times of chaos, I master myself more.
[00:13:30] I spend more time in meditation.
I spend more time in prayer.
I spend more time with self.
I spend more time battle planning.
Strategizing.
Thinking about the best course of action.
Thinking about the short term, the medium term, the long term.
I'm thinking about all of these plays.
So the question is, how, how do I continue to do it guys?
It's not anything complicated.
[00:14:00] It's the most simple path, but it's the hardest path because what it requires you to do is have the highest level of discipline.Here's the secret formula.
I teach this to clients.
You can have this for free.
Wake up earlier than you ever want to.
Go read something.
[00:14:30] Listen to an audio book, introduce new things into the mind every single day for the rest of your life.
Go to the gym or walk.
Be active every single day.
Eat right.
Learn to love yourself.
Treat yourself right.
Upgrade different areas of your life.
Because you're worth it, and your family's worth it.
Spend more quality time with your family.
[00:15:00] And end the days early, so you get enough rest to attack the hill tomorrow.
If you follow the battle plan, all you have to do is commit to it and not veer off the path.
That's what people do.
“Oh, it's so boring.”“Ah, I'm so tired today.”
“Ah, the weather.”
“Oh, I got to wait till the new year.”
“Oh, I got to do this other thing.”
“Oh, well, you know, business is going crazy, so I can't sleep.”
“Oh, you know, I got kids and stuff like that.”
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
“So I can't go to the gym.”
[00:15:30] So many different things will be in front of you as a trial.
Are you going to submit to every trial and say, “That's true. I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't. The perfect conditions right now do not exist. So, I cannot.”
If you believe that, then you are choosing the life that 99 percent of the sheep of this world have.
[00:16:00] To have 1 percent results, to actually maximize on opportunity, it's understanding that when you don't want to wake up, and you do, that's where you earn your spot.
When you want to hit that snooze where you're just like, “Damn, I just want to get some f*cking sleep today. Jeez, like, when can I just sleep in for like a week? When can I just like, catch up on rest?”
You don't.
Because to live a purposeful life, your purpose is not in your sleep.
You have it all backwards.
[00:16:30] Your purpose is found through the suffering, through the sacrifice that you experience on a daily basis, finding why the f*ck you would wake up.
That's your purpose.
Why would you?
Not, “Can I sleep in?”It's, “Why the f*ck would I? What's this bigger mission I need to accomplish in life, where I would know, in my heart of hearts, that I need to get the f*ck up right now?”
What is that for you?
What is your purpose on this planet?
You got one life.
You got one shot.
[00:17:00] What is this for?
Because I can guarantee you, it's not to wake up to go to a 9-to-5 job that you hate, working for a boss you absolutely despise and do not respect, just to commute 1 to 2 to 3 to 4 hours every single f*cking day, hating your life, and watching every disgruntled motherf*cker hate theirs.
Guarantee you that is not why you're on this planet.
Guarantee you that you're worth more than that.
That your purpose is a lot bigger than that sh*t.
But do you believe in you?
[00:17:30] Do you believe that you, your purpose, is something bigger than just that?
Settling for that f*cking life.
I can guarantee you, your purpose is something you can't even understand.
See, when I started saying that I'm gonna change the trajectory of my bloodline, I never said that years ago.
I would never have the confidence to say that because in my mind, years ago, I would be like, “Who the f*ck am I?”Now I know who the f*ck I am.
But you evolve.
[00:18:00] Your purpose continues to expand and evolve over time, but you've got to want more for yourself.
You got to dream bigger for yourself.
You got to dream bigger for your family.
You got to want more for all of them.
And you have to know that you're the guy, you're the person that's going to get that for them.
They're not doing it.
That's why you hear the calling.
Not that they can't, but it's your purpose.And you gotta understand that.
[00:18:30] And you gotta know that it's gonna be the hardest f*cking thing you could ever f*cking commit to, because this is your life's work.
Preparation in your life meets opportunity of a lifetime.
And every day there are so many people that leave this life, never knowing what it feels like to wake up with a sense of purpose.
There was hundreds.
[00:19:00] If not thousands of people that thought they were waking up today and didn't and they never got to find themselves
They never even knew themselves
They never even knew that they could be f*cking happy.They could be happy sacrificing.
They could put smiles on their family's faces.
They'll never know that.
Are you willing to sacrifice that?
Are you willing to regret that at the end of your journey?
[00:19:30] Are you willing one day to look down from the heavens and say, “F*ck, I should have learned my goddamn lesson. I should have tried. I should have failed. I should have known. I wouldn't have…”You gotta know you're meant for something.
You're meant for something bigger.
But every day are you battle testing yourself with every challenge that you face in life, in business.
Are you choosing the easy path of just complaining?
[00:20:00] Or are you choosing the hard path and saying, “I don't know why the f*ck this is happening to me, but it's happening for me. What is the lesson that life, God, the universe is trying to teach me right now, so I can become the best version of me?”What is the pain that you're gonna heal inside of yourself that you can then use to heal the world?
What is it?
Isn't that the purpose of this life?
Isn't that the point for you to become somebody you can't even f*cking think about right now.[00:20:30] You can't even imagine them right now to get to a level where your purpose in life is to serve people, to be leaders, to be seniors, to be mentors, to be guides for others who are lost in this world.
To teach them what you've learned, isn't that what we've always done as humans?
To teach the next person, to pass the torch of knowledge onto the next person, so they can live, so they can survive.
Isn't that why we do what we do?
[00:21:00] When has the world become so lost?
That it's about me, me, me, me, me, I want, I want.
Isn't the whole point of having family, having tribe, having community, so we can learn the lessons of life, distill that into books, into teachings, to then give to the next generation?Isn't that the purpose of what we're doing here?
[00:21:30] When did we get so disconnected from the purpose of f*cking life?
Have you forgotten that at some point, when you're no longer here, the generations that follow will look back on their timeline and they'll know your name.
You don't realize that you're an important factor for your bloodline?
[00:22:00] You don't realize that 50 years from now, 100 years from now, 200, years from now, somebody in your bloodline will be looking at that family tree, at the history of your last name, and seeing where the f*ck they came from?Do you not understand that you could be that pivotal key player in that timeline that changed everything for them, 100-200, years from now?
[00:22:30] Your bloodline will either thank you, or it'll no longer exist.
Because you didn't put your heart and soul into building the best version of you that can give to the world.
That can lead from the front, that can create a foundation, not just for you, not just for the world, but the generations that come after us.
You have to understand the opportunity of becoming who you need to be for your bloodline.[00:23:00] Do you realize the sense of purpose that you can wake up with every single day knowing that that is you?
That nobody else, you're the black sheep, it's you.You're the one that thinks this way, you're the one that feels this way, you're the one that can even fathom that it's possible.
Your family won't understand, your friends won't understand, you might not even understand.
You'll be like, “Nah, I don't f*cking - that's a lot of responsibility, Phil.”
Yeah, 100 f*cking percent.
But you're still here, aren't you?
You're still f*cking listening to this, aren't you?
[00:23:30] When are you gonna stop denying yourself?
When are you gonna accept the fact that you're meant for something bigger than what you're already doing right now?But, are you willing to walk that path?
Are you willing to be that person?
Are you willing to see if you can be?
Are you willing on a daily basis to prove to yourself that you are it?
That is the purpose of life.
[00:24:00] Every single day, proving to yourself you are who you think you are.
You are who you think you can be.
Whether or not you get results.
Whether or not things feel good.
Whether or not things feel bad.
Just continue to show up.
Every single day is a battle that allows you to prepare.
And one day you win all of these battles?
Without realizing it, you'll win the war.
An opportunity will be abundant.
[00:24:30] Not because anything really changed.
But you changed.
You finally know you.
And wouldn't it be a beautiful life?
To just know you?
To just look in the mirror and just be proud.
Knowing who the f*ck you are.
Think about that.That's the show.
[00:25:00] Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
-
In this episode, Phil discusses the true essence of success, focusing on selflessness and helping others. He shares personal experiences to show that success isn't about personal achievements or wealth, but about genuinely helping others without expecting anything in return. Phil emphasizes the importance of kindness and humility in all aspects of life, from business to personal relationships. His key message is that real success and fulfillment come from positively impacting others' lives, choosing a selfless approach over an ego-driven approach. Giving and treating people well is the fundamental secret sauce to true success.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:08) - How To Win In Business
(06:08) - The Secret Sauce of Success
(14:59) - Breaking the Ego Barrier
(19:00) - Defying Odds
(20:14) - Quantum Leaps Through Generosity
(24:22) - The Ripple Effect of Kindness
Follow Phil Bohol’s Socials:
LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Twitter | TikTok
Transcription:
[00:00:00] This is the secret sauce to success.
People don't want to understand this though.
People are like, no, no, no, no. I have to first be this rock star.
I first have to like be a millionaire.
I first have to have my first million dollar business.
I have to be this like high level person for people to give me the respect.
No motherf*cker.
That's called ego.
That's called pride.
That's called all of that bullsh*t that will never serve you.
If I thought like that, I would have never entered the rooms that I enter now.
[00:00:30] What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol, and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:01:00] If you want to be successful, I think a lot of people misunderstand what it actually means to win at this game of life.
Most people are in it for themselves.
Most people think that In order to win, you just gotta look out for number one.
You just gotta look out for this guy.
But the truth is, that is not the case.
If you believe that this life is a selfish life, and you serve nobody but yourself, then you will always lose.
[00:01:30] The most selfish people in the world are the losers in life.
The most selfish people in the world are the ones that never get ahead in life because what they do is they prioritize themselves versus helping the person to the left and to the right of them to win.
You have to understand, the more people that you help in this world, the more that you win.
And it's the act of giving.
So when we think about building massive successful businesses, it's about helping clients.
It's about helping people.
Because if you help them win, then your business looks really good.
[00:02:00] And that is how your business wins.
But there's some people out there, especially in the online coaching industry, that are just in it for themselves, in it for their money.
And if that's the case, then what happens is you create this terrible reputation for yourself that that's all you are.
You don't really give support to your people.
And your business will tank at some point, if not already.
[00:02:30] But the people that give and give and give to their community and to their tribe, the same way that I do, constantly get referrals, constantly have clients wanting to renew, re-enroll to be plugged into a tribe with a leader that genuinely gives a f*ck about them.And you might not have a coaching business, you might have a brick and mortar business, but isn't it exactly the same?
Let's say you have an appliance shop and you're, you're a mom and pop shop, right?
You're not a big box, but you're a mom and pop.
[00:03:00] If you were to care about your clients, make sure their deliveries were good, make sure their installations were timely, make sure their customer service and their sales experience was all 10 out of 10 good to go, wouldn't you have clients each year?
Even if they don't need to buy appliances all the time, wouldn't they come back for more?
Wouldn't they refer their best friend who's fridge just broke during the holidays to go talk to you.
That's a 3,000 deal right there.
What if, what if mom and dad's dishwasher breaks, but they had the best experience with you, don't you think you would get that referral?
What happens though if you do things different?
What happens if you don't care about people and you're just in it for the deal?
[00:03:30] You sell somebody some sh*t that they don't need.
Gave them a sh*tty experience, because you had a bad day and you spilled coffee on yourself, and somebody cut you off on the freeway.You're treated like some somebody like sh*t.
Do you think that they're gonna say, “Hey, mom and dad, hey, best friend, go to this f*cker that just treated me like sh*t.”?Absolutely not.
You think about any business that you have, any f*cking business model, the only way that business is going to win is if you help people.
Let's take this away from business.
Let's say you're not a business owner.
[00:04:00] Let's say that you just wanna get ahead in life.
You're not going to get ahead in life, just like bullies will never get ahead in life by bullying people.
Bullies are the biggest sh*tbags in the world.
And for a moment in time, that third grade level, they might win because they're the biggest and baddest.
But what happens over time is, the reputation follows them, their confidence gets shot, they don't have a lot of opportunities because they burned all the bridges of the people that could have probably got them set up.
And they lose in life the same way that happens in adulthood.
[00:04:30] If you're just in it for yourself and you want to get ahead of the game, but all you do is look out for number one and that's you, nobody's going to want to help you because you didn't help anybody along the way.
It's the people that understand that they want to get to the top of the mountain.
They know that they want to win at this game of life, but they also want to give value to everybody that they meet, everybody that they come across.
It doesn't matter at what level they're at, they want to help that they see a grandma crossing the street.
Don't want to help the grandma across the street.
[00:05:00] Who knows though, you help grandma across the street.
You might find that grandma is a multimillionaire that was just looking for somebody nice to give an opportunity to, and that was you simply by not asking her for an opportunity.
But being a kind, genuine f*cking human wanting to help her across the street.
You never know who people know, and you never know who people are, and you never know who people will become in the future.
So if you want to get ahead in life, the whole point is not focusing on getting ahead.
[00:05:30] The whole point is understanding that the marketplace, which is life, will award you.
For how much you put into the marketplace, how much energy you put into it, how much you're an asset to everybody that you come across.
Everybody that I meet, I try to give value to in any shape, way, or form.
And I don't try to throw up what I perceive as value to them.
I genuinely figure out what is valuable to them.
And I try to be that or deliver that or introduce somebody that can deliver that.
[00:06:00] When I first started in the online space, I didn't have any type of online presence, I didn't have, I f*cking didn't even have pictures.
I didn't even like social media.
I thought it was stupid and I thought it was for stupid people.
But the world is going to social media so you have to connect to people and I had to shift my perspective because me thinking that way was selfish.
Because I didn't want to give to people.
I wanted to protect my privacy and blah blah blah.
[00:06:30] And the reason why I went from having zero network, zero anybody that knew my name, to only being surrounded by multi millionaires, ranging anywhere between a million to a hundred million.
How did I go from this guy, from a third world country, barely graduated high school, did drugs, f*cking drank a lot, almost threw his f*cking life down the sh*thole, joined the military, still no f*ckin millionaires over there.
And then somehow now, all I am surrounded by are high level people.
That give me their cell phone number and say, “Bro, at any time, you need anything, you just give me a call.”
How the f*ck did I do that?[00:07:00] Well, I can guarantee you, I didn't get there by saying, “Hey bro, what can you do for me? Hey, you're a high level player, what can you do for me? Give me something.”
No.
At every level that I've met somebody that I've added to my network, my intention was not, let me do something nice for this person so they can reciprocate and give me something.
The intention would be so f*cking off, you can smell that sh*t from a mile away, and just so you motherf*ckers know, at a high level, we can sense that sh*t.
[00:07:30] If your intentions aren't pure, easily able to sense that sh*t.
Don't ever feel like you're gonna get away with it.
Don't try to charm your way through sh*t, because again, all of the red flags that we are aware of, you are not aware that we are aware.
The game is played at a different level.
So just understand that if your intentions are not pure.We can smell that sh*t from a mile away.
You just got to understand that.
And so for me, I've never really tried to take or receive from people.
I've always tried to give the best that I can.
[00:08:00] And sometimes that just means me being a good listener, me being a good student, me being a good human.
And just by being a good f*cking human to people and treating people, not like millionaires on the come up, but as human beings who have achieved a level of success and giving them that respect, and even once I started doing my first million online, or my second million online, still treating people like f*cking humans, whether they're above me or below me.
I treat everybody as equals.
We're all people.
[00:08:30] We all have blood in our body.
And we all have bullsh*t we have to deal with.
And we're all trying our best.
That is how I view the world.
And by doing that and treating people this way, not asking, but giving as much as possible, what happens is, it's the law of reciprocity.
You give something to the world, the world will give something back, usually tenfold.
But you don't say, in my timeline, you don't say, “I'm gonna give this to this person, so they give me something in return in the next five f*cking days.”
No, no, no, no.
[00:09:00] You give without ever having an intention to receive anything back because it might not be that person that gives something back in return.
You might throw some equity into the universe, and you might not get it for another month, another year, another f*cking decade.
You never f*cking know when you're getting it back.
But you will, because that's how the world works.
That's how the universe works.
And it might not be from the same entity you poured into.
You might give peace, joy, space to somebody.
[00:09:30] And that act of kindness doesn't come back from them, sometimes that act of kindness comes from somebody else.
That thing that the universe will throw back your way tenfold, sometimes may be an opportunity, a year from now, a month from now, a week from now, a day from now, who f*cking knows?
But that opportunity would have never presented itself if you weren't a good human to this other person over here.
I think they call that sh*t the butterfly effect.
You do something over here, it affects the rest of the timeline.
I don't f*cking know.
[00:10:00] But I want you to understand that in order to be successful in life, if you can just grasp this one f*cking thing, you will be successful, wildly successful, more than you can even imagine right now.If every person that you meet Instead of getting in your way about how you negatively feel about the world, instead of questioning or doubting, “What is this person's intention? Do they want something from me?”
[00:10:30] Instead of giving off that f*cking energy, if you were just to shake people's hand and really genuinely want to get to know them, and know that they're an awesome human, and that they've probably been through a lot of sh*t in their life, and that you've been through a lot of sh*t in your life, and that's what makes things, like, that's the commonality between you two, and then you go about your f*cking day.
And then you just say what's up, nicely, for the rest of time.
You do that with a thousand people, your entire life changes.
Because what happens is, they're gonna throw that energy back to you.
You give energy to them, they give it back to you.
And what happens is it starts creating like this storm of energy.
And then other people are gonna feel that, they're gonna sense that, they're gonna be like, “Oh, what the f*ck is this guy about?”
You know, this person's giving them good energy, this person's giving them good energy.[00:11:00] I'm gonna go check them out, and maybe that person was looking exactly for you.
What you had to offer, your skill set.
Your poise, your confidence, your ability, your f*cking availability, I don't f*cking know.
They're looking for something that you have to offer, but they would have never made that offer unless they felt your energy in these other areas of life.
So again, it's not the thing that you put energy into that gives you the energy back.Sometimes it'll come back tenfold from another source.
You have to remember that.
[00:11:30] And if you really, really want to crush it at this game, you have to have the long game in mind.
You can't have this immediate instant gratification bullsh*t where it's like, “I give now, I want now.”Give so much, become the most valuable person in everybody's f*cking life.
And just trust, have faith that that is going to turn you into the most successful person because the most successful people in the world are the most valuable, the most valuable people in the world give the most.
[00:12:00] And because they give the most, they're recognized the most.
The person that gives the least, nobody wants to f*ck with that person.
Everybody's like, “Ah, I don't f*cking know. Don't have my number. Not adding you as a friend. Blocked. Please don't show up to any of my gatherings or f*cking parties, you piece of sh*t. And anybody who invites them, you're exed too, motherf*cker.”Don't be that guy.
That guy f*cking sucks.
Nobody likes that guy.
[00:12:30] Everybody likes the guy that's like, “Oh yeah, I'd f*cking love to have you over. I would love, I mean, you don't really say much, but you're nice, and you're good people.”
And then eventually your confidence grows being in those rooms that you don't feel like you rate being a part of.
It's when you finally have a seat at the table and you're like, “Oh sh*t, I'm with the big dogs now, like Jesus Christ, I don't even know if I should be here.”I can't tell you how many rooms I've been in with the f*cking billionaires, with people doing high eight figures, f*cking people just everywhere in between.
And I'm just like, “Jesus Christ bro, I'm just like this dude that came from the gutter and like, I'm f*cking here.” Or something, I don't f*cking know.
[00:13:00] And I'm just smiling with my face looking like this.
And I was like, “Hey, what's up? I'm Phil I'm Phil I'm Phil. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. Awesome. Tats. Awesome. Awesome. Awesome. I hear a lot of great things about you. Awesome. I heard you speak. I heard this. I heard that.”
And I'm not saying like, ‘Hey, let me tell you about me. Let me tell you everything about everything that I've ever done in my f*cking life to make me look and feel like the part.’
I'm like, ‘If nobody knew about me, I don't give a two sh*ts.’[00:13:30] But what happens in those moments when I'm networking with people, and this is what's given me so many opportunities in life, is I'm so curious about other people that at some point they're just like, “Oh Jesus Christ, Phil, bro, like, you've been asking me about my life this entire f*cking time. What about you, bro? What do you do?”
And sometimes, all it takes is for you to care about other people.
A lot of the times care about other people more than you care about yourself and what you can get out of people.
Think about how that applies to business.
In business, if all you want to do is help people genuinely and they can feel that, won't they do business with you?
If you're in sales, and all you want to do is genuinely help solve people's problems, won't they do the deal with you?
[00:14:00] If, if you want to crush it in romance, let's say that you're not married yet, or you're trying to find your girlfriend, or, you know, you're courting your future wife, I don't f*cking know, you're super nice to them, and you want to be the best version of you for them.
Won't they do that deal with you?
Won't they say yes?
When, when you pop the question, won't they say yes, the date?
Won't they want to take you more serious because you're actually being the guy that they need in their life?
Think about any area of your life.[00:14:30] If you were just the most helpful f*cking person in every area of your life, wouldn't everybody give you everything that you could have ever possibly asked for?
And even if they didn't, wouldn't you do that so much in so many different areas that it wouldn't really matter?
Because if you don't get it from this area, you get it from another area.
You see what I'm saying?
That this is the secret sauce to success.
People don't want to understand this though.
[00:15:00] People are like, “No, no, no, no, no. I have to first be this rock star. I first have to, like, be a millionaire. I first have to have my first million dollar business. I have to be this high level person for people to give me the respect.”No, motherf*cker.
That's called ego.
That's called pride.
That's called all of that bullsh*t that will never serve you.
If I thought like that, I would have never entered the rooms that I enter now.
Literally.
The only people that I respond to on text are doing anywhere between 8 figures and 9 figures.
That's it.
Everybody else, you can wait because I got sh*t to do.
[00:15:30] How did I go from like, doing shady sh*t in the town in the middle of the f*cking night, doing f*cking drug deals over here to try to put food on the table, to like, doing things legit, and being a good person, and an ethical f*cking human being.How did that happen?
It's because I was over here all about me, all about my money, all about survival.
Doing whatever it took, no matter what.
And I had to do whatever I had to do.
It is what it is, I don't f*cking know.
But over here, you don't grow that way.
You burn bridges.
[00:16:00] And what you have to do in this life is understand that life, like, we're all f*cking connected.
We are all on this path.
We have one life to f*cking live, and if our timelines meet like they do right now, if you're watching this video, our timelines are meeting right now.
There's a bridge that connects us, and if you can see that in life, we're all connected.
We might not know each other right now, you might have just met me for the first time.
[00:16:30] You might have just bumped into my content for the first time, but our timelines were meant to meet at this point.
The question is, will our timelines part ways because you don't connect?
Or will you build the first step to building that bridge and have that bond forever there?
Do you see what I'm saying?
If you were to do that with everybody that you meet, you're going to create so much opportunity for yourself.
[00:17:00] And when you create opportunity and you prepare every single day, you wake up early, you go to the gym, you eat, right?
You do good things.
You're an ethical human being.
You have high integrity.
You put yourself in positions where it's uncomfortable, but you know, it's going to cause you to grow.
You're preparing for that opportunity.
So that way, once the opportunity presents itself, you're ready for it.
That's what's called luck.
When preparation meets opportunity and all of those opportunities, it's either going to be a little opportunity because you're a sh*t bag or a lot of opportunity.
[00:17:30] But what happens is sometimes people can create a lot of opportunity for themselves, but they haven't been battle testing themselves.
They haven't been preparing for it.
And because of that opportunity also passes.
It's kind of like that sushi buffet, right?
It's like on that f*cking turntable or whatever.
The sushi might go around, or f*ck, it might have been there for a couple days, I don't know, and they spray it with water to make it look good.
But it comes around, it might not come back around again, it might be gone forever.
So you have to understand, it's a balance, it's this art form to truly be successful, you gotta help people.
[00:18:00] And if you look at life that way, every area of your life, starting today.
You don't have to, like, wait till tomorrow, you don't have to prepare for this sh*t, you just choose to be a good human to everybody.
Choose to do it right now.
Emotional control, emotional mastery will help you with this because no matter how the f*ck your day went, you still treat people good, you're gonna get that back.
It's gonna completely change your life.
[00:18:30] See in your life where you might have been dropping the ball here, where you might have been doing life for you versus doing life to help people and to serve people.
And by helping other people get what they want in life, you ultimately get what you want in life, but you don't focus on you.
You focus on everybody.
Imagine what happens when you do that day in day out with everybody you f*cking meet.
You're gonna get hit with so much success, so much abundance, so much joy, so many opportunities, you don't even know what the fu*ck to do with them.
And you're just gonna feel blessed.
You're gonna feel grateful.
[00:19:00] And all of that gratitude, all of those good, positive emotions are coming from you just putting goodness into the world.
And the world is now giving it back to you.
So I want you to understand that this whole game of success has nothing to do with your level of skill set, okay?
I never had any formal training in a lot of the sh*t that I'm in now.
I never went to f*cking college.
I think I stepped on a college campus and I was like, “I don't even know how to f*cking sign up for this sh*t, so I'm out.”Like, I literally, remember, I spent like one hour trying to figure it out and I was like, “This is dumb.”
I don't f*cking know.
[00:19:30] I barely graduated high school.
I was truant in high school.
You never saw me junior year, you definitely didn't see me senior year.
Somehow I made it to prom, and somehow I got selected as the top three for prom king, even though I was never in class.
I don't know if people were just, you know, playing a joke on the staff and sh*t, but, f*ck, and it happened.
I barely graduated high school, because of how depressed I was.
How truant I was, because I was just like, “I don't f*cking care about the world anymore. I just wanna die.”
I went from like, the brokenness from 10 to 18 years old.
[00:20:00] If somebody like me can create the network, the opportunity, the success I have today, and I came literally from not a first world country but a third world country, and maximize on my opportunity by being a good f*cking human to people, I promise you your life can change.But I will tell you this, being selfless takes a lot more work than being selfish.
Because being selfish is easy.
[00:20:30] Just like, “I don't care about anybody. I don't want to deal with anybody's sh*t. I don't want to carry anybody's burden on my f*cking back. It's not my burden to bear.”
But when you start putting other people first, you start carrying that burden of leadership.Of, like, sacrificing.
You know, sometimes when I only had, like, 20 bucks, I'd give people 10.
That was 50 percent of what I had.
Some people would be like, “Oh, f*cking just 10.”
And they have like thousands, hundreds of thousands of dollars at that time.
Probably not, we were young.
But you get what I'm saying?
[00:21:00] And they give like 10 bucks and it's like, “But that's like a cent to you, bro.”I would give like half, sometimes I'd give it all.
Sometimes I give people my money and I'd have to figure out the money because I knew I had it in me, and I'd rather give it to themAnd that happened for f*cking years, guys.
And this is also when I was working like odd jobs and sh*t, you know, like making 600 every two weeks and sh*t.
I still have the checks.
I'm probably gonna, you know, do a video with it and like f*cking check it out, you know, and I just wanted to give.
[00:21:30] I just wanted to help because at some point I was like “You know, like, even though it sucks for me, I can handle it.”You know, like, “I believe in me. I'll figure it out. I just genuinely care about this person, though, because I feel like they're gonna break, bro. So I might as well, like, give them the last of me, and I'll go figure it the f*ck out.”
I've done that all throughout my life, and for many years, I didn't see anything come back to me.
I didn't see any, like, forward momentum.
I didn't get an opportunity.
But because of that, I spent time in self mastery.
I spent time preparing myself.
[00:22:00] Not because I knew something was coming, but I just focused every day to be the best I could be, to figure out the best course of action, and to execute on whatever I could.And over time, that started to compound.
And f*ck, I went decade after f*cking decade just going down more in the red.
And that sense of belief, having faith that all of this is for something.Going through your trials, accepting all of the sh*t that's happened and happening in your life.
That's all part of it.
[00:22:30] It's trusting this f*cking process that everything is built.
Like, the plan is already there and you just have to walk the path.
But you got to believe there's a high sense of belief there.
Most people start breaking on themselves because they're just like, I can't endure this anymore.
So the preparation stops.
So I want you to understand that it wasn't always easy for me.
There's many times, many times I didn't have any money.
Many, many times I was like negative, like big negative, negative a hundred thousand plus in the red.
And I still had to hold true that.
I was going to figure it the f*ck out.[00:23:00] And the only way I was able to do that, and to heal myself in those moments when I felt the weakest was, “Okay, things aren't going my way. F*ck it. I don't f*cking know. I'm going to go help somebody, bro. I don't know. Somebody needs help right now. I just need to distract myself from me for a minute. And I'm going to go help people.”
Every time I helped people, something weird happened.
My energy shifted.
I felt stronger.
I got to see things in life from a different perspective.
And that allowed me to just win for one more day.
[00:23:30] And all of those days stacked into weeks, stacked into months, stacked into years, and win after win after win just by showing up for me, myself, and people around me, eventually I just started quantum leaping.
And that's just been happening the past couple years, but if you saw my life, day for day for day, you would have never guessed that I would have made it out of that sh*t.
You'd have probably guessed that I'd probably end up dead, to be honest.
And I genuinely thought I was going to turn out dead too.
I never thought I'd reach a level of success.
[00:24:00] But the only way I was able to do that was to realize that the thing that healed me was helping people.
The thing that healed me was not focusing on me.
The thing that actually allowed me to have these quantum leaps in life, in business, and in family, was to stop focusing on me, my hurt, my pain, and all of the bullsh*t that comes along with it.
And wanting to protect myself from being hurt again in life.
I had to be open completely with life to receive life, to feel life again.
[00:24:30] So if you want to win at this game of life, if you genuinely want to be successful, help more people.
By helping more people, you help yourself because you heal yourself.
You become the best version of you.
You become the most valuable version of you.
And that version of you is the version of you that everybody wants to f*cking know.
And you might not feel confident about it.
You might be like, “Oh Jesus Christ, it's just me. I don't know why everybody wants to know me.”And that's okay.
Even at this level.
[00:25:00] I've had multiple conversations just this past week where I'm just like, “I don't f*cking know why people keep giving me their cell phone numbers. I don't know why all these f*cking higher level people are like, ‘Hey bro, if you ever need anything, just f*cking text me or call me.’”
Whatever the f*ck.
I still don't f*cking know till right now.
I don't get it, but I'm sharing with you exactly what's worked for me up until now, and even though I'm blindly just going like, “Okay, I'm just being super helpful all the time, I don't f*cking know, opportunities keep presenting themselves. I'm establishing deeper relationships with people because I'm authentically, genuinely just wanting to help people.”And if you become that person for everybody that you know in life, you're gonna have to go through your season of haters.
You're gonna have to go through your season of doubters.
And at some point, because you believe you and what the f*ck you're doing on this planet, the world will believe you at some point.
You just can't lose that belief in yourself.
All right, help more people.
Help one more person today.
Just see how that fills up your cup.
And then stack that, every day moving forward, help one more person every single day, and just see how that changes your life.
[00:26:00] And just see, the more work you put in, head f*cking down on just like, doing the work you gotta do on a daily basis, helping people on a daily basis, by the time you look up, your entire world f*cking changes.
This whole life that I have now, it's been built.
Nobody gave this sh*t to me.
I didn't have parents to help me with this sh*t.
I didn't have parents to f*cking guide me in this sh*t.
I had to figure all this sh*t out on my own, but, somehow I'm f*cking here.
I don't know.
I just f*cking do my best, and I give my best.
Daily.
[00:26:30] And apparently that's a lot.
But do you value you?
Do you value your efforts to that level?
If not, I would start there.
Because if you don't value you, then you're never going to put yourself out there.
You're never going to help people because you're not going to feel like you're valuable enough to those people.
But again, isn't that the most selfish act?
Being so worried about if you can help somebody versus just trying your best to help them.
[00:27:00] I didn't always know, always know the answers, but I always knew that my heart would want to help somebody.
And even if I couldn't personally help them, I point them in the right direction.And that's why people are open to talking to me.
So if you want to be successful, help one person today, prove to yourself that this is truth.
And then practice that discipline on a daily basis, you will reach a level of success you couldn't even f*cking dream of it.
I never dreamt of this life that I have today.
[00:27:30] And I was fortunate enough to meet all the right people all along the way, that I can give value to, and that are still very close friends of mine to this day, and we've only ever met through social media, online.
It's a very interesting thing.
So I want you to understand if there's ever a time where you just need to reach out and talk, never hesitate to reach out to me, even if it's just a conversation.I'll probably talk to you about some of my programs because that's how I actually will be able to help you, but if it's just a conversation you need, just a little pick me up, just tell me where you came from, tell me what's going on in your life, and let's have a chat.
[00:28:00] And then you go about your f*cking day, and you go do that for somebody else.
Pass that torch of knowledge, that experience to somebody else.
Give them that gift.
That's how you're gonna succeed in the world.
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said, and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:28:30]
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